I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

30

Sep

Britney Spears and Her Tits in White Cuz She’s Pure of the Day

You know a tit’s not too perky when shit hangs in a shirt like some kind of half-full, or half empty, depending on whether you are an optimist or pessimist. You know when it looks like her tits are spread on her chest like fuckin’ peanut butter on toast. Shit’s straight out of an African tribe, or the pages of national geographic, or what is better known as my masturbation material before the internet, making this some kind of throw back porn for those of you into African tribal tits, but not so into the Africa part.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Britney Spears|Tits

2009

30

Sep

Alyson Hannigan Grabbin Tit in Video of the Day

Here is some bullshit Funny or Die video, even though I hate Funny or Die, but it’s a lot easier to post than pictures cuz I am lazy.

The video is about a group of almost celebs talking about breast cancer and giving themselves self checks, and the whole thing is fucking boring, even when Alyson Hannigan feels up one of the bitches. You could just press play to find all this boring out for yourself, instead of making me do this recap cuz I am lazy….

The joke is weak as fuck, but I like celebrating tits and saving girls everywhere from having to chop them off, because I am a fucking hero when it comes to tits, so I figure I’ll post it for you to masturbate to.

Posted in:Alyson Hannigan|Jaime King|Katherine McPhee

2009

30

Sep

Rachel Stevens and Her 2010 Calendar of the Day

I feel bad posting these calendar pics of Rachel Stevens cuz I know that no one is going to go out and buy her calendar and it was her last attempt to make some money to pay for her luxurious life thanks to getting into the industry at a young age and becoming famous and capable of buying anything she wanted, until that whole S-Club 7 show I used to jerk off to fad died the way it was supposed to.

I don’t feel bad, because any idiot who releases a calendar is just too behind the times to deserve making any money. They do deserve to be ripped off. I also don’t feel bad because I don’t really have a soul, but I do have the closest thing I’ve felt to a boner in a long time lokin at this girl. She may be my soulmate who I’ll never get to be with becuase society has put her where she is and me where I am but I’m thinking that’s probably not it and it’s more to do with how good of a fuck she would be, even if she was sleeping thru the whole thing….I mean ideally if she was sleeping thru the whole thing…that way she can’t tell me to stop or call the police….

Posted in:Calendar|Rachel Stevens

2009

30

Sep

Michelle Hunziker is Acting of the Day

There’s some Italian piece of shit movie called Christmas in Beverly Hills that I’ve written about before, because the paparazzi agencies are posting pics of these random stars I’ve never heard of, but would want to seduce with my boyish good looks and by boyish good looks I mean my penis the size of a 3 year old’s penis, not that I know what I three year olds penis looks like, but I do know what my penis looks like.

I have heard of Michelle Hunziker, she’s some hot 30 something european bitch who has posed naked and shit, and apparently she acts.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Actor|Michelle Hunziker

2009

30

Sep

Heather Locklear is Lookin’ Old of the Day

I know Heather Locklear was once a hot piece of woman and if you like zombie lookin’ bitches who look like their faces belong in an open casket cuz the botox puffed shit out and left it lifeless, she still is, but all I see is a drooping mess buried in a lot of fucking make-up and a shitty body, making me wonder why she gets work. Oh right, because of her phenomenal acting skill also knows as sucking the producers dick cuz she’s a whore not that that’s a new concept or anything, I just think it’s the only explanation.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Uncategorized

2009

30

Sep

Miranda Kerr and her TIts Fly to Paris for Fashion Week of the Day

I am not in Paris for Fashion Week because fashion isn’t really my thing and Paris is pretty faggy and romantic and made for rich people, give me a full tank of gas and a shitty RV and I’m happy, but Miranda Kerr is and as she walks thru the airport she looks like she’s staring in some kind of old movie that is all glamorous and classy and that kind of refined look makes jerking off on her face a lot more fun. I’ve always loved the uptight girls who you’d expect to see with their napkins on their laps eating at fancy restaurants drinking expensive wines and talking about current events or in the park having a picnic with herself reading some smart person book like this was 1940s let loose, so to any guys out there who are friends with this girl, or see her in a bar, do your best to treat her like a lady and by lady I mean whore and camera phone that shit.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Fashion Week|Miranda Kerr

2009

30

Sep

The Producers of Gossip Girl Dress Taylor Momsen Like a Whore of the Day

If I dressed my teenage girl like a little whore and sent her to school, or staged photoshoots with her in the park, the police would pull me the fuck over and arrest my ass for being some kind of sex offender, but for some reason the producers of Gossip Girl not only get away with dressing this Momsen 16 year old like a whore and making money off of her like she was their ho, but they also send a bitch in to play with her vagina in front of the world and no one is doin’ shit about it cuz they are all Hollywood and shit, proving yet again that life’s just not fair.

Here’s a picture of what I assume is a maxipad slip because she’s too young and virginal for tampons…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Taylor Momsen|Whore

2009

30

Sep

Drew Barrymore Unfortunately in a Fetish Lookin Dress of the Day

Drew Barrymore premiered her Charlie’s Angel 4-The Rollerskate Years movie staring the cunt I can’t stand from Juno because Drew Barrymore milks this whole Girl Power bullshit that gives girls everywhere the wrong idea about their place in the world, fucking up the whole balanace of the world and more importantly works against all the hard work men have put into keeping their bitches their bitches, if you know what I mean. When the reality is that roller derby chicks, like suicide girl chicks, are fat, lesbian, rockers with tattoos who no one really wants to see naked, except maybe other roller derby chicks, you know after they finish beating each other up oin the rink.

She wore some fetish dress that would look great with my cum dripping off it, provided it was on another chick, we’ll just leave this pig-face for the Mac guy.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Dress|Drew Barrymore|Leather

2009

30

Sep

Rosa Acosta and Tammy Torres Behind the Scenes of their 2010 Calendar of the Day

Rosa Acosta is one of those pieces of gutter trash girls who I guess is in Hip Hop videos or some shit because I’ve been hearing her name a lot all because she’s got a stupid fuckin’ ass. It turns out she’s got a friend named Tammy Torres who is equally gutter trash who also has a crazy ass and since I was drinking til 6 am, this is an easy post for my hangover because I like ass, even if it’s on girls who the rest of them reminds me of whores at a bad 80s heavy metal show. They are shooting a 2010 Calendar because I guess their target market are really into Calendars because keeping track of dates is really important when you’re street hustlin’ and have 3 different blackberries, one for your baby momma to call you, one for your jump offs to call you and the other for bidness…..

Posted in:Rosa Acosta|Tammy Torres

2009

30

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

The paparazzi remain cocksuckers…I got this email yesterday from a big paparazzi agency who I was legally getting pictures from:

I was asked to disable your account by upper management.  I believe your postings have pushed the boundaries of “Good taste” 

So I wrote:

I played by the rules, I respected your limits you instilled and now you are shutting down my account because my content pushes the boundaries of good taste? I didn’t realize Splash was Emily fuckin’ Post’s rules of etiquette in how you conduct yourself or your business following celebs in their most intimate moments…and killing Princess Diana. Cocksuckers.

When the paparazzi say you are pushing the boundaries of “Good Taste” you know you are fucking gutter.

On a more interesting note I got this spam and it made me laugh….

Dear Sir/Madam,
 
I am pleasure to know you from Internet ! 
If this email disturb you, Please ignore or delete ! Thanks !

On a more interesting note, I need a monkey to affectionately hold my thigh……my wife isn’t as cute….

On an even more interesting note, Here are my stepLINKS….

Katie Cassidy is my Celebrity Slut Obsession
GO

If You Didn’t Hate Your Life Already You Will After This
GO

Mary Louise Parker is a Home Wrecking Whore, and I Like It!
GO

Toni Brakton Wind Blown Panty Upskirt Throback
GO

BEST WINDOWS AD EVERRRR!
GO

Man I Would Really Love to Bang George Clooney’s New Girlfriend, Way More Than That Other Stripper He Was Fucking
GO

Madonna Sexy Hall Of Fame….I am not joking….
GO

Because I Know Your Moms Basement Ca Probably Get Pretty Boring at Time
GO

The Eiffel Tower Explained – The Sex Position That Changed History
GO

100 of the Greatest You Tube Videos in 4 Minutes
GO

Mel Gibson Is Making This Way to Fucking Easy
GO

Next Time, Write an HONEST Letter to Your One Night Stand
GO

Tila Tequila is Fucking Weird Looking And These Freaky Contact Lenses Aren’t Helping
GO

some Young, Blonde Amateurs
GO

Rihanna is Wearing More Crazy Shit But I’d Still Stick It to Her, So Whatever
GO

Courtney Cox is Slidin On Up That Cougar Ladder Nicely
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Brynne Gordon is a Hot, Gold Digging Piece, You Go Girl!!
GO

Ahhhhhhhhhh Shakira
GO

Eva Habermann Gallery
GO

Rima is Nude in the Mirror
GO

Ninja Idiot
GO

Lesbians Stay After School for Detention
GO

Bree Olsen Gallery
GO

Meet Jessica Canizales
GO

Britney Skye Wants You to Want Her
GO

Fuck What’s Wrong With Brook Hogan’s Music, WTF is Wrong With This Bitches Face?
GO

Jo Hicks Nude Black and Whites
GO

TWINS!!!TWINS!!TWINS!!
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

I Don’t Give a Shit What She Has Growning Inside Her, Jennifer Ellison is a Fucking Whale
GO

Mandy Michaels Rubs Herself Down with Lotion
GO

Mindy Vega Love’s Lollipops
GO

Playboy Mexico is Like the Welfare Version of Playboy, But Here’s Some Slut Named Jillian on the Cover Anyways
GO

Okay, Here’s the Trailer for The Gorssest Movie Ever
GO

Let’s Play Guess That Ass
GO

Bitch Gotta Tail
GO

Some Throwback Cameron Diaz THong Pics
GO

Hot AIDS Ads cuz AIDS is Hot
GO

ROMAN POLANSKI’S PIRATE DAYS
GO

ICE-T’s WIFE COCO HAS A SISTER … WITH HUGE TITS … AND SHE’S BISEXUAL, TOO!
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS