I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

29

Sep

Latoya Jackson is Some Kind of Monster I Wanna Bang of the Day

There comes a point in every chronic masturbater’s life where porn just doesn’t work anymore. That’s when people turn to freakish shit, whether it is joining the boy scouts as a team leader to see little boys naked, or sitting on public transit all day waiting for the school girls to get out of class to expose themselves to them. Some guys go gay or bi to open up the possibilities in the bedroom, since their luck with girls never really counted as luck and was more disaster and figured dudes with AIDS would be less picky. Some guys explore trannies, while others do fat chicks and there’s really no science behind it. Just last week I was talking to a girl who masturbates to anime and another dude sent me a link to his sex doll shaped like an anime, and here is Latoya Jackson who hardly looks like an alien or cartoon, but I know at least one person out there would still fuck or at least jerk off to her fake tits.

On a side note, I have this theory that Michael Jackson was an alien, he did have a weird obsession with space and moons and moonwalking and he did end up lookin like some kind of monster who’s human disguise withered away so I guess it is only natural for his sister to age the same way. I also have a theory that Michael Jackson in collaboration with the middle east staged his own death to distract the public from the Iranian election, while solving his own problems like a tour he didn’t want to do, debt he couldn’t pay and selling more albums and movie tickets from generating a whole new level of interest in him, but who cares about what I think…just think about cumming on this Latoya face.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Alien|Latoya Jackson|Monster

2009

29

Sep

Puerto Rican Day Parade 2009 of the Day

As Americans you have no excuse for living in whatever shitty small down you live in and not down in the Caribbean island that your people own, cuz shit seems like it is just the right amount of gutter that makes you feel like you are in the projects, but the climate to remind you that you are in some kind of paradise So here are the trashy Puerto Rican girls and their asses, the trashy Puerto Rican guys and their pit bulls, gangster clothes and pick up trucks, all celebrating being not quite American and it is hot.

Posted in:Gutter|Puerto Rico Day

2009

29

Sep

Sophie Monk’s Still Seducing Us in Her Little Black Dress of the Day

Sophie Monk is still crying for attention and I like it. It’s like my very own Katy Perry song only way more interesting to look at. I only woke up a few minutes ago, I have no stories for you just now, I just spent the last 20 minutes listening to my 58 year old, crazy immigrant coffee and sandwich man tell me about how he was up all night and didn’t have a chance to shower because he just figured out what the internet is and spent the night jerking off to gangbang porn. Not normally a conversation you wanna have before eating a sandwich he made you for free, but beggars can’t be choosers and it was a great sandwich in case you were wondering. A lot like Sophie Monk’s pussy, you know it has herpes thanks to Paris Hilton, but that’s not gonna stop you from smelling it’s aroma or tasting it’s lovely sauce…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Publicity Week|Sophie Monk

2009

28

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

It is a Jewish holiday today, so everyone wish my one self hating Jewish reader a Happy Holiday. You can also try to telepathically communicate with all of Hollywood and wish them a happy Jewish holiday, because, maybe they will hear you and sweep you out of your shitty life and give you a new gig where everyone will be taking your pictures and asking for autographs like you were Annalynne McCord the one hit wonder. Or you could just drink yourself stupid, strip down naked and break into your neighbor’s apartment and surprise them with your pathetic boner because the fat bitch is frying fish right now and my whole house smells like rotting pussy, my favorite kind of pussy and I feel like she should celebrate this erection with me, unfortunately I’ll probably pass out before that magic moment.

Here are my stepLINKS, don’t pass out before clicking this magic.


Kate Beckinsale is All I Want in Life
GO

The New Nightmare of Elm Street Pretty Much Looks Like the Worst Movie Ever
GO

Brazilian Girls in Bikinis
GO

Sofia Vergara’s Sluttiest Pics
GO

Because There is No Fucking Way You Got Married This Weekend Anyways
GO

Tawny Kitaen Got Arrested for a DUI
GO

Hooters Slut Shows Off Her Skills
GO

The Olden Days Were Creepy as Fuck
GO

Lily Allen Pantyhose Upskirt Will Probably Make You Puke, But Here It Is Anyways
GO

How Elephant Shit Can Save Your Life!!!
GO

How Awesome Would It Be If Courtney Love and Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez Start Bangin’?
GO

Jessica Biel Looks So Gross Sometimes
GO

The 7 Deadly Sins of Sharing a Bathroom
GO

Stripfilm of the Day
GO

Michael Douglas Looks Like He’s About 300 Years Old, But Catherine Zeta Jones is a Hot Piece
GO

I Know I May Regret Saying This, But Rumer Willis is Looking Kind of Hot Here
GO

Juliette Lewis is Completely Off the Deep End Insane and I Love It
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

How About Some More Sophie Monk?
GO

Time to Step Your Game Up – VIDEO
GO

Let the Divorce Watch Begin!! I Give it 4 Months
GO

The 12 Sexiest Counties in Sport
GO

Webcame Cyber Sex Prank – VIDEO
GO

Big Titted Asian Squirter
GO

Bobbi Star and the Fucking Machine
GO

Tis the Season for Oktoberfest Sluts
GO

Fall in Love With Dani Woodword
GO

How Awesome Would It Be Watching Lohan on Celebrity Big Brother?
GO

Janet Jackson Topless Throwback
GO

A Naked Babe, a Toy and a Webcam
GO

Shailene Woodly is the Jailbait of the Day
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Aria Giovanni and Jelena Jensen Give Each Other Rub Downs
GO

VIVA VIAGRA!
GO

Beyonce Hates Lindsay Lohan!! Amazing!!
GO

The North Carolina Education Lottery – VIDEO
GO

Party Time?!
GO

Some Sexy Ads You Will Want to Check Out
GO

10 Celebrities Sluts Whose Tits Are Way Too Big
GO

Camwhore with a Perfect Rack
GO

Of Course Japanese Infomercials Are Amazing
GO

NOW HERE’S A STORY THAT IS JUST AS GOOD AS A BOTTLE OF VIAGRA, A JAR OF LOTION, AND A NICE WARM TOWEL TO CLEAN YOU OFF!
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

28

Sep

Ashley TIsdale Brings the See Thru Shirt for her Ugly Watch of the Day

I have a thing I do called Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch because one day I decided I hated her for no reason other than the fact that she had an ugly face. I think it happened after she got the nosejob because I figure she probably had a new found ego even though her face was just as ugly as it was before. A lot like the bitch I knew with breast implants who went from being this mouse-like quiet girl in the corner, to a slut who flashed her tits and fucked every guy she could, all because she got fake tits. It’s this false confidence that encourages girls everywhere to get expensive plastic surgery and it becomes this never-ending cycle of making asshole doctors richer when all these girls need to do is post pics of their pussies, cuz when they get down like that, bitch doesn’t even need a fuckin face like the face-transplant chick, or a masked muslim girl to get male attention or acceptance and the last time I checked taking pussy pics was a lot less expensive than plastic surgery and a lot more rewarding…

Here are some pics of Tisdale at some event with a see thru shirt showing off what may be a bra that leads me to think she may have been better off if she opted for the breast implants instead of the new nose, but I guess she’s enough money and the rest of her life to make that happen, since we all know she’s a useless, superficial dog.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|See Thru

2009

28

Sep

Janet Jackson and her Shitty See Thru Shirt of the Day

For those of you who haven’t been able to jerk off to pictures of Michael Jackson like you used to, because he was porn to you, now that he’s dead or at least pretending he is dead because it makes you feel fucking awkward, here’s a safe alternative, in the form of his sister and her fat tits in a see thru shirt with a bra on, not that anyone who spent the last few years jerking off to pictures of Michael Jackson because he was porn to them really cares about feelin’ awkward or lookin’ for safe alternatives, because clearly anyone who does that is just not right.
Sure some of you are thinking that no one jerked off thinking of Michael Jackson or lookin at pics of Michael Jackson in the last 5 years,, but you’re giving the human species too much fucking credit, since I’ve discovered first hand that the most vile thing you can think of, at least one motherfucker out there has done it, I’m talking things that make cumming on print outs of MJ seem normal.

Here are the pics…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bra|Janet Jackson|See Thru

2009

28

Sep

Lala Vasquez is Washing Her Car Put Still Smells Like Trash of the Day

Here is some fat pig attention whore named Lala Vasquez. She hangs out with Kim Kardashian and her vile sisters and I don’t know what she does, but it seems like she’s tied into VH1 as they are probably the only people willing to give her work because she must be blackmailing an exec there as she looks like fucking garbage you expect working the street corner and not on your TV.

In typical fucking trash styke, she went out to wash her car in her Ed Hardy clothes, I guess in efforts to get some paparazzi pictures taken of her, because when you’re a fat attention whore pig and that’s what you live for. She even went on to pour a bottle of water on tits her in attempt to be sexy or shocking or playful with the camera but It just looks like a joke to to me. She should probably just stick to eating, her body leads me to believe she’s real good at that and leave the sexy car wash to the highschool girls raising money for their graduation party in the gas station down the street from me.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Attention Whore|Car Wash|Lala Vasquez|Trash

2009

28

Sep

Daisy Lowe Forgets Her Pants of the Day

Her name is Daisy Lowe and she has a really fascinated story, if hearing about the hardships of useless rich kids is something you find fascinating. At 20, she is a model who dated such legendary figures like Samantha Ronson’s annoying musical brother, she spent the first 15 years of her life not knowing her dad was Gavin Rossdale from Bush and Gwen Stefani’s vagina fame and all that stress has made her forget her pants, unless this is supposed to be fashionable, which based on the racks at my local American Apparel, the Beyonce video and Lady Gaga, the general public is following their fuckin’ lead and walking around in what would looks like their one piece bathing suits and I figure even when it is on disgusting bitches, it’s still more entertaining than regular pants for a pervert like me because the more people adopt this trend, making it mainstream and luring the hot 9 to 5er girls to adopt the trend substantially improving walking down the street.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Daisy Lowe|Pantsless

2009

28

Sep

Kelly Rowland and Her Breast Implant of the Day

When Destiny’s Child disbanded, Beyonce the Ego who felt she carried the band because her dad was their manager and he obviously favorer her and went and launched a solo career that has led to acting jobs, solo careers and awards while Kelly Rowland her partner she came up with, went out and got implants.

That’s like when my friend I used to party, drink, do drugs and pick up girls with feel off the scene and got a job, eventually leading to making millions with his own company, while I just stuck around and got herpes only the herpes didn’t cost me 5000 dollars like Rowland’s tits, they were only 60 bucks, she was a cheap whore and I guess you get what you pay for, so take that all you assholes who landed with the shit for free, my strain is by far more luxurious.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Breast Implant|cleavage|Kelly Rowland

2009

28

Sep

Kelly Brook Slutting Out for Heels that Heal of the Day

I am a fan of charities that pressure women to get naked or half naked for the cause in efforts to generate buzz. The ones that real strike a chord with bitches and makes them think they are heartless cunts if they don’t get naked for the cause. At least that’s what the pervert who runs the shit tells them, when in reality he’s just some foot festishist who jerks off to the pictures too racy to make the campaign and pulls a huge salary off his “Not for Profit Organization” cuz everyone knows charities are a fucking money makin’ scam that works because veryone is too nice to question their intentions or target them as being con artists and the people behind charities are usually smart enough to keep the books clean as to not ruin a good thing they have running, like having the power to get celebrities in lingerie.

The highlight of this Kelly Brook campaign is that she brags about being a gold diggin’ whore who dates a rugby player who pays her for sex with expensive shoes, I mean besides the latex thigh highs…..

Posted in:Heels that Heal|Kelly Brook|Latex