I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

28

Sep

Alba Bending Over in Shorts of the Day

Do you ever look at mother’s of pretty much any age and wonder what position they were in the night their baby daddy’s sperm stuck. You know whether they were in doggy or missionary, or if they were on top. Were they doing something freaky or even the star pussy in a gangbang, cuz you know whatever it was left them filled with cum and that in and of itself is hot, at least before they find out they are pregnant and decide to keep the fuckin’ thing, and long before they ruin their bodies or in Jessica Alba’s career by having the fucking thing, because there was a time she was the talentless Megan Fox with a lot of sex appeal of her generation, but the second you pass the throne by knockin’ yourself up I guess people forget about you, unless you wear shorts and walk around with hard nipples and without your baby, because out of sight means visions of a ravaged vagina are out of mind….

I think she may have a hard nipple, but I can’t really tell, maybe you can and even if it’s not hard, you can pretend, since pretending is the basis of your sex life the last 5 years….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bending|Jessica Alab|Shorts

2009

28

Sep

A Romantic Story About a Man and His Small Penis of the Day

Here’s a story of a man who wanted to have a bigger penis, so he decided to attach a weight to the shit and it swelled 5 times its original size and turn black like he was a rapper or some shit, but instead of getting a fat white girl, he got an embarrassing visit from the firemen who had to cuz the weight off his dick and I have a feeling this motherfucker reads my site, because that kind of desperation for an average sized dick is only something I’d expect from you.

On a sidenote, I used to follow the Circumsized Support Group, because I thought it was funny that people actually had a support group because they were circumsized without their consent as kids and part of their recovery process was to attach weights to their dicks to stretch the skin out and give the illusion that they were never hacked the fuck up. But I guess that’s got nothing to do with anything, I just thought it was funny, so watch the video.

Posted in:Penis Enlargement. Fail

2009

27

Sep

Sophie Monk Bikini Titty Slip of the Day

Sophie Monk released some posed bikini pictures with her nipple exposed. Her quest to fame is getting more and more desperate and that is a good thing because it means more and more nudity.

This is the kind of post that is pretty much hot enough to make my day and I don’t mean make my day in personal celebrity sexual fetish satisfaction, because I hate celebrities, but in terms of posting pictures of celebrities on the internet for idiots who still like reading and seeing pictures of celebrities, because apparently there are still some of you out there. Meaning I don’t have to post anything else today because we’ve got pretty much all we need with Sophie Monk tit.

This post may even be the post of the fuckin’ week since celebrity nudity is drying up almost as fast as Sophie Monk’s career, but before it fully fades into obscurity, she’s willing to pull all kinds of stunts, trying all she can to remind us she is still around, and it is workng because with a dry career comes a wet pussy in effort to lube up opportunities and by opportunity I mean producer cock.

I guess I technically never have to post, it’s not like this is my fucking job or anything, it’s just what I do to remind myself that living my own life is a waste of time when I can post pictures of other assholes who I fucking hate, despite the fact that I’d totally fuck….

Pics via FAME

Posted in:Bikini|Nipple|Sophie Monk

2009

27

Sep

Rap Music Video of the Day

The biggest travesty in the world isn’t that we all hate each other and are killing each other. It isn’t AIDS, or Cancer, or the obesity crisis. It isn’t that we are in a recession or poor, and it’s not corrupt governments or global warming. It is that this video on had 161 views at the time I posted this. Sure it could be from another site and it could be a joke and not for serious, but I think this prophet’s word needs to be heard, it needs to be on the radio and TV and sure I don’t really get it, but this is me doing my part…

Posted in:Killing U Fagas|Rap Music

2009

26

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

I spent a solid 4 hours in a bar last night trying to convince this one really decent lookin college girl who was probably new to town as she was alone at a pretty shitty bar cuz she didn’t know any better, to let me take nude pictures of her for an art project I was working on. I tried all angles for promises of stardom and fame, to bullshit art fag rationale you hear when idiots spend too much time analyzing something that wasn’t supposed to be analyzed in the first place. I told her shit like her body reminded me of the possiblity of a brighter tomorrow, shit like that her natural beauty brings hope in this culturally void, sleazy and disgusting society because it reminds us that something so pure and beautiful can exist. I said shit like that I was inspired by her and pulled every possible trick I have learned in the years of trying to get girls naked and really didn’t hold back on making myself look like a total asshole. I was making moves. I saw in her eye that she was about to bite and then I must have pushed shit too far cuz she ended up going home with the bass player in the houseband who she had met 5 miuntes earlier, when no one goes home with the bass player ever. Reminding me that I suck at life…

With all that work gone to waste, I decided to try it on some homeless woman, but she just answered in a series of yelps, beeps and grunts that I think translated into “I’m fucking crazy, I will bite your fucking dick off if you don’t give me a quarter”, which scared me nicely and saved me from having to try to scrub the smell of her rancid homeless cunt out of my couch.

I should have 10,000 Followers on Twitter, But I Don’t, Help Change That
GO

Here are my stepLINKS


Holly Madison + Aubrey O’Day = Silicone Explosion
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Randy Quaid’s Mug Shot is All Sorts of Awesome. What a Profile!
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Because Your Web Came is Good For More than Just World of Warcraft
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Hayden Panty-Airs is Banging the Midget From Entourage
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Bear Grylls Ain’t So Tough Afterall
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80’s Toys That Should Be Movies
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Nicole Richie Upskirt Throwback
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Mayor Eric Brewer Seems to Love Dressing Up Like a Washed Up Hoe
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Who Wants to Fuck a Muppet?
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Where the Fuck Has Jessica Biel Been Anyways?
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Check Out the Legs on This Bitch
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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30 Shots of Awesome Bathroom Graffiti
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striptease of the Day
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Here’s a Video Called the Sex Lives of Robots
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Amanda Seyfried is Way Hotter Than She is Given Credit For
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I Have No Idea Who Tinsley Mortimer is, But She is a Blonde Slut Getting a Reality Show So I’m Sure We Will Be Seeing More of Her. Hopefully Naked At Some Point
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Ahhhhhh Halle Berry!
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Jude Law is Father of the Year
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Ashley Simpson Needs to Stop Getting Plastic Surgery For Fuck Sakes
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A Sitdown Segway is a Nerd Virgin’s Geeky Wet Dream
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Nadine in the Dungeon
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Girl Beats Up Her Loser Boyfriend
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These Sluts Use Anything and Everything to Get Off
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Bree Olsen Rides a Sybian
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Alice Goodwin is Worth a Wank or Two
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Random Photos of the Day
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CANDICE MICHELLE NAKED WITH ANOTHER PLAYBOY PLAYMATE … DAMN, THEY LOOK LIKE THEY ENJOY EACH OTHER’S PUSSY, DON’T THEY?
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Lohan May Be in Some Deep Shit
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Bianca Gascoigne
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Striptease in the Kitchen
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Sexy Candice Swanepoel Throwback
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Julia Crown is a Swedish Blonde
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Naked on the Radio
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College Footbal Cheerleader Fun
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Gotta Love Gymnasts
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Vanessa Hudgens Photoshoot
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Rugby Match Turns Into a Fucking Brawl!
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This Guys Dick Quite Possibly May Be Smaller Than Mine
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Here’s a Video of Lady Gaga Before She Turned Into a Fame Whoreing Self Absorbed Cunt
Girl Has Real Talent, Too Bad It’s Clouded By Her Stupidity
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Sand Animation is Pretty Awesome
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YOU’VE SEEN THE PICTURES, NOW HERE’S THE VIDEO OF CRAZY FUCKIN’ PAM ANDERSON GETTING NAKED ON THE RUNWAY IN NEW ZEALAND
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

25

Sep

Phoebe Price in a See Thru Shirt of the Day

I have no idea why Phoebe Price is invited to all these hollywood functions, or why the paparazzi know who she is, or why people write about her in tabloids and on the internet. I just know she has been in one or two things as an actor, she probably comes from a very rich Southern family and I guess is just one of those Socialites who spends her days getting ready for the red carpet events she’s addicted to, when she’s not staging photoshoots with herself in her bikini. I also know that I have a red carpet addiction of my own, just not the conventional red carpet but the red carpet in a redheads panties, making me a Phoebe Price pretty much one in the fuckin’ same. Unfortunately, she’s not 18 anymore, but she is wearing a see through shirt and that kind of effort’s gotta count for something, I’m just not sure what….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Phoebe Price|See Thru

2009

25

Sep

Kelly Brook Naked for Ralph Lauren of the Day

< Kelly Brook got some gig posing naked for Ralph Lauren, the downside is that she's covering her pussy with a bunch of flowers, which is a bit of a stretch because I hear her pussy hasn't got anything in common with flowers, despite what she wants people to believe, and more in common with rotting meat in the dumpster outside my butcher shop down the street. I don't know if thst's true, I just had nothing to really say about her since I know nothing about her or pictures of naked bitches with flowers, I just know that I once bought my wife roses and tried to convince her to let me fuck her with one back in the day, but only cuz I thought a "thorn in her pussy" would be a hell of a funnier expression that a "thorn in her side" and knew she needed to feel it first hand to really have conviction when dropping that line in public. Unfortunately, shit never came to fruition cuz she ruins all my fun. I have no idea what kind of drivel I am talkin' but I do know that Ralph Lauren photoshopped her pussy out, defeating the whole point in having her fucking naked to begin with, assholes.... .

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Ralph Lauren

2009

25

Sep

Edyta Sliwinska is Some Dancing with the Stars Bitch of the Day

< Here is a prime example of a hot body ruined by a really big fuckin' head. Seriously, this bitch looks like a caricature you get done of yourself on the boardwalk in Jersey but her body is fuckin' killer. She's a polish sex worker who took up ballroom dance in hopes it would take her to the internation dancefloor and I guess it did, because now she's on TV in what I call a cocksucker Hollywood attempt to prevent strippers from being fucking strippers by giving them mainstream work. If you notice the level of skill she has to be good enough to be on the show, it's safe to say that with a little more desperation and a lot less money and opportunity thanks to this new fucking interest in dancing, she probably would have had an amazing fucking strip show. So fuck you people for making dance mainstream and taking the talent off my local stages and lapdance booths.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Dancing|Edyta Sliwinska

2009

25

Sep

Pam Anderson’s G-String on the Runway of the Day

I don’t know when these pictures were taken, they were just emailed to me. So they could be old or they could be new, I just know that I don’t remember seeing them before and based on how her asshole seems to be sucking her ass cheeks in, making her booty look like some flat, indented, sagging sack of fuckin’ jello you’d expect to see when changing diapers at the old folks home, I’m gonna go with that they are recent enough. I gusess what I’m trying to figure out is what happened to her youth, sure she’s partied hard, fucked hard, had two kids hard, got plastic surgery hard, but is no longer getting me hard. Does that mean I’m getting old too? I guess these Pam pictures are meant to inspire us all to embrace what we have when we’ve got it, otherwise life will just run its course right past us. So here are those inpsiring pictures of an era coming to an end…….but on the positive side of things, her tits are only a few years old, so despite how disgusting the rest of her gets, she’ll at least have perky tits.

Posted in:G-String|Pam Anderson

2009

25

Sep

Very Pregnant Heidi Klum Nipple of the Day

Heidi Klum and Seal are serious fucking breeders. I’ve heard about couples wanting to have a kid or two, but she seems to be constantly pregnant and lookin at the size of her now really scares me, not only because I can’t stand the idea of a baby growing inside another person like some kind of virus or STD, like the girl who makes me sandwiches who told me she had to take the day off to get pre-cancerous cells burned off her cervix because she had sex with dirty people in her youth and had HPV making me want to fuck my sandwich instead of eating it cuz it was just that fucking hot, only in Heidi Klum’s case shit does a lot more damage to her pussy…not that Seal hasn’t already done an amazing job massacring that thing, I mean she’s definitely not married to him because of his boyish good looks, since he looks like something out of a horror movie, which may be something German’s like since they are a sick breed of jew killing monsters, she’s married to him because of his massive dick.

Here are pics of her hard nipples and her massive belly that I am pretty sure she will bounce back from….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Heidi Klum|Pregnant