I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

23

Jan

Kim Kardashian’s Driver Never Shows Up of the Day

I guess I was wrong about KIm Kardashian, it turns out that she does know how to walk. Sure she only takes a couple of steps while looking for her driver, because even he knows she’s a useless nobody, not worth being on time for, but that’s more exercise than this pig has had all year. This is like running a marathon for her and you can tell in her panting that she feels the fucking burn.

Now let’s just hope the rest of the world takes her driver’s lead and forgets about her, because that is the only way to make this whore disappear. You got that? So stop jerking off to her fat ass, fat tits and fat head that you helped create. It is just that simple.

Posted in:Forgotten|Kim Kardashian|Whore

2009

23

Jan

A Tribute to Mariana Bridi da Costa’s Hands and Feet of the Day

Some Brazilian Model/Miss World contestant was misdiagnosed for some infection and the doctor’s ended up wrongfully amputating her hands and feet. That’s some pretty scary shit. You know you go to the hospital to get fixed up and they end up fuckin ruining your life, or at least the life she knew. I feel bad for her and that’s saying a lot because I pretty much have no soul.

On a side note, I remember the first and last time I met a guy with an amputee fetish. It was in the mid 90s and the guy used to hang around the same bars as me. After he got a few drinks in him, he’d start to open up about how the thought of rubbing his dick on an amputee’s stump is the single hottest thing to him, and at first I thought he was joking.

But after 6 months of being slowly eased into his weird world by hearing the same fucking lecture, he started to open up a little more and talk about the hot amputees he found and seduced and had sex with. He then started bringing in amputee erotica and pictues of amputee porn that he found or took himself. The whole thing started becoming an obvious obsession. He got a job working at some rehab clinic for amputees, fitting them for fake legs and shit, and he would tell us about how fucking hard he would get if the right girl came in, sometimes rubbing her more sensually than his bosses would like, but a lot of amputees fell for him. Maybe it was because they felt disabled and unable to get a man, so they lowered their standards, or maybe he just had good game, but I do know that it was getting a little creepy after getting in a huge fight with a group of girls at the bar about how they may have all their parts in the right places and how obvious and inadequate that makes them…it was weird, but not as weird as when he disappeared and came back a year later on crutches because he decided to self-mutilate/amputate because he couldn’t go on with life, or get off lookin’ at his whole self, or some other crazy shit.

All this to say, that this Brazilian chick will have no problem finding some sick fuck to push her around and help her get her life back on track by using her stumps as sex toys or some other crazy shit that she can’t protest because it’s pretty hard to call for help with no fingers….or run away with no feet, if you know what I mean….

Either way, I found this funny tribute video I had to post because it’s some site just trying to get traffic and it’s badly done making it amazing…maybe I am just getting won over by the song choice….watch it.

Here’s a link to the story if you’re interested in never trusting doctor’s again.
GO

Posted in:Amputee|Mariana Bridi de Costa|Medical Malpractice

2009

23

Jan

Shaia Lebouf Rocks’ My Wife’s Sex Hat of the Day

I am not going to spend too much time on this craziness, but I figured since I just posted Pete Wentz dressed in furry boots, I figure I should post a little Shaia Lebouf brown paper-baggin’ himself because it’s kinda the same clown behavior.

I assume this little cunt is letting celebrity get to his annoying little head, making him pull some kind of a Michael Jackson move, only instead of being scared of air and sun, this motherfucker is scared about bad press and us judging him for being drunk/high in public mid day, after losing his license for drunk driving, so he figures wrapping his hand in a plastic bag and his head in a paper bag will divert our attention from the stumble in his walk. I mean there is no other explanation for why someone would do this, unless he’s having a bad hair day, which is probably something vain celebrities stay inside for under normal circumstances, because they are soft little pussies, but not the kind of soft little pussy I want to fuck.

I know trying to mask myself because I was overcome with shame, I used to pull this same stunt everytime I jerked off in front of the mirror, or date raped a girl in front of a mirror, or on camera, you know I just couldnt stomach seeing my cries of pleasure, while knowing what I was doing was against god’s way.

Here’s a video from him later in the day showing how tough his is by calling the paparazzi fucking assholes after they prank him. Good times. I don’t really get why he’s still wearing a cast from an accident that happened in July, that’s pretty fucking weak of him, obviously it’s a cry for attention, like people who claim they have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, or some other made up disease. I guess they real tragedy is that his car accident back in July didn’t kill him, or leave him brain damaged and in a home, I figure he was driving drunk so he deserves it but more importantly, we don’t need these kind of people in the world, especially when they are shoved down our throat in the media and on TV.

Posted in:Paperbag|Shaia Lebouf

2009

23

Jan

Pete Wentz and His Furry Boots of the Day

I don’t know what’s mo’ gayer, Pete Wentz pushing the boundaries of gender by wearing a pair of furry boots he bought because they reminded him of the first time Ashlee’s fucked his black furry cunt, or the fact that I am posting pictures of it because they made me laugh.

Speaking of laughing at gays, Ronson has a big night here in Montreal that I’ve been asked to not attend directly from Lohan, so I sent her this email.

Subject: Ronson in Montreal

Aren’t you excited?! Samantha’s playing in Montreal and I’ve been training my penis to look like a vagina all week. Between you and me, it wasn’t that hard. 

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

She didn’t answer, but I expect to be arrested tonight because she’s crazy and has more pull than me on the socio-economic ladder, so cops side with her, even though she’s fucking jacked on drugs and insane, while I’m just a normal nice guy…

Posted in:Furry Boots|Gay|Pete Wentz

2009

23

Jan

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Bikini Pictures Cuz That’s What She Does of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio was out in her bikini. I don’t really give a fuck, because this is like watching a postal clerk applying a stamp, or like watching a janitor take out the trash, or like watching a chamber maid getting an abortion after getting a little too close to a vaccuum salesman, a nurse changing bed pans, an orderly raping the patients in comas, a retail store clerk pocketing money from the till, an executive sleep her way up the corporate ladder, a chef spitting in food, a stripper rubbing on your dick in a booth, or greasing up a pole with her skank ass, and a prostitute suckin’ dick. Watching a bitch at work and getting paid for it just is’t as inspiring or interesting as when she does it from the bottom of her slut heart….that’s all I feel like saying about this….

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Bikini

2009

23

Jan

stepLINKS of the Day

So I put my facebook profile up on the site and 20 people added me. That means 20 people read my post and clicked on the link. I guess I was wrong about only thinking 15 people read the site. Even Michael Norton, Edward Norton’s asian brother from New York added me. Sure they may not be related, but let me live the fucking dream because if I think I’m moving up and moving on, I won’t kill myself, motherfuckers.

Here are my links.


For the Love of Christ, Please God No
GO

Rachel Stevens, WTF Are You Wearing?
GO

When Arnold Made an Energy Drink
GO

In Case You Haven’t Had Enough Marisa Miller in a Bikini This Week
GO

Keep Me Alive While Keeping Yourself From Raping an Innocent Girl
GO

The Hottest Miss America Contestants Of This Year
GO

I Wish Kim Kardashian Would Let Me Make Her a Special Milkshake
GO

I Really, Really Need a Secretary
GO

If I Was Ten Years Older, and She Was Ten Years Younger, I Would Be All Over Bethany
GO

Hene is Some Kind of Wonderful
GO

Fun With Porno
GO

Bianca Beauchamp is All Oiled Up
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Find a Girl to Fuck, Because If Anyone Know Having Sex Alone Sucks, It’s Me
GO

Oh Yeah, Heath Ledger Died One Year Ago Today or Some Shit
GO

Lily Allen Talks About Making Out With Lesbian Twins Because She is Becoming Irrelevant
And Wants People to Pay Attention to Her
GO

I Can Think of Some GOOP I’d Like to Shower on Gwenyth Paltrow
GO

HOlly Valance Gallery
GO

Introducing Vanessa
GO

Jesus, And I Thought I Was a Bad Parent…
GO

This is Your Mouth on Meth
GO

Evolution of Dance Part 2
GO

Kayden Cross Has Got Something to Show You
GO

Audrey Bitoni is My Idea of Heaven
GO

Found My Wife’s New Haircut
GO

Sponge Bob is Now Rated X
GO

Katya Has the Kind of Body Your Pig of a Girlfriend Can Only Dream Of
GO

You Can Use This to Help You Get Sex
GO

Lindsay Lohan is Going to Take All of Sam Romson’s Trust Fund Money She’s Been Living Off For Years
GO

Remember That Slut Sarah Larson
GO

This ‘Real Housewives’Shit Just Keeps Getting Better
GO

Elle Macpherson Needs to Get a Wax
GO

Rhian Sugden Nude Calendar
GO

They Are Finally Making a Movie of The Rum Diary
GO

Fox News is Having a Cry Over Jay Z’s and Little Waynes Lyrics
GO

Stop Motion Sweet Dreams
GO

Lookin Good Sweetheart
GO

Krystal Steal is Naked!
GO

Love Hurts…
http://www.sexyandfunny.com/watch_video/love-hurts_37861.html

Her Name is Natalie McGhie and She’s a Slut – here’s Her Gallery
http://gorillamask.net/gm_media.php?show_page=gallery&page_id=21327

Some Drunk Dude Catching a Serious Beating From His Girlfriend Video
http://www.machovideo.com/video/Drunk_dude_gets_beating_from_girlfriend_13137/

Natasha is My Kind of Myspace Slut
GO

Fix Scratched CDs with Bananas and Toothpaste
GO

Wino Saved Some Bitch From Drowning or Some Shit
GO

The Five Best Black Dudes Who Ever Made Movied
GO

The American Idol Chick Putting Those Big Tits To Use
GO

Some Girl Gets Publicly Jizzed at Some Street Festival By Some Really Weird Man
GO

Some Bianca Beauchamp Latex Pics
GO

Fat Brazilian Ass Shake Video
GO

Some Sneaky Stripper Pole Dance Accident
GO

Gisele GQ Photoshoot Video
GO

Amy Winehouse Shows Pamela Anderson How It’s Done
GO

The Pigs Take it Too Far…
GO

Some Meat Bikinis
GO

Some Sexy and Revealing Red Dresses….on Sluts
GO

Christina Milian Getting Taken By Behind….Sounds A Lot Better Than it Is Trust Me….
GO

Old Jennifer Connelly Upskirt Video
GO

Some Crackwhores Beating the Fuck Out of Each Other…One of them Has See Through Panties On….Sexy
GO

I Lost My Cellphone in Your Vagina
GO

Life Through the Eyes of a Vagina
GO

101 Celebrity Cleavage Pictures
GO

Some Hot Twins Get Naked Together…
GO

Some Party Girls Making Out and Shit
GO

Half Naked Sluts Taking Their Slut Tits Out
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S SLEAZY FIND

Some Emo Sluts Naked….A Whole Lot of Them…
GO

Can Boobs be Emo?
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

22

Jan

The Secret to the Success of the Obama Relationship of the Day

Now I can only assume that this is doctored because I can’t imagine this actually made it on the air, but scroll to the 1:55 mark. I don’t know where this Love Doctor’s been hanging out, but I assume it’s the Lohan/Ronson crack den. I like to keep my relationship alive by not hanging out with my wife and stealing money out of her purse to spend on getting drunk enough to touch young hot girls inappropriately then coming home and telling my wife how inadequate and disgusting she is, so that her self esteem becomes non existant, she gets fatter and has less confidence to leave me, and eventually dies when her heart explodes leaving me with her pension. It sounds a lot less romantic than it actually is.

This was sent in by Anorak , check them out….

Posted in:Barack Obama|Michelle Obama

2009

22

Jan

Lindsay Lohan’s Girlfriend Looks Like Her Dad of the Day

I got this email:

this is why lindsay and sam are together…because sam looks like lindsay’s dad.

i’m no scientist…but i think lindsay might need some therapy to heal her issues with her dad…so she doesn’t date chicks that look like him.

that’s sick babe.

comparison pic attached…

Now I am no a scientist either, but I don’t think this is an issue of science, I mean it’s definitely not the cure to addiction or HIV, but it is common for girls to date dudes who look or remind them of their fathers. I guess when their dad’s are total fucking fuck ups who I hate and don’t even know, they turn to pussy, but I guess they just can’t break free from going for what they know.

It’s no secret that Lohan is hopped up on the booze and drugs she snorts as a result of having horrible parents and no childhood making her this weak scared victim, it’s also no secret that Sam Ronson looks like a man, but I wouldn’t go as far as to say that Ronson looks like’ Mike Lohan, but it wouldn’t be a shock if we found out she was one of his many love children he doesn’t know exist because he was blacked out from substance abuse and Dina Lohan’s annoying demands.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Mike Lohan|Samantha Ronson

2009

22

Jan

I am – Daydreamin’ of a Tied Up Bitch of the Day

I used to do a feature called “Day Dreamin'”, I haven’t done one in a long time because I was watching TV at a friend’s house and some motherfucker used the song I used in a TV commercial, leaving me at a loss about what to fucking do about postin’ these videos, but I’ve got over it and had this video from the Adult Expo that happened a couple weeks ago of some girl and her handler with ropes….cuz there’s nothing like day dreamin’ about a tied up bitch, because you know it’s harder for her to escape.

Posted in:Bondage|stepDAYDREAM|stepTV

2009

22

Jan

Zelda Williams and the Paparazzi of the Day

I have officially decided to follow Zelda Williams around because we go way back. I was trying to seduce her when she was just a private school girl in San Francisco on Friendster 5 or 6 years ago. She never bit, so I can only assume she’s a lesbian, especially when going shopping for moisturizer with your arm around some slut while wearing plaid. I am sure you would be a lesbian if you’re dad was Robin Williams too, I mean dude’s fucking annoying as shit and having him as the predominant male figure in your life, would probably lead you to other side. I just hope she inherited his hairy gene, because if her pussy looks anything like her father’s chest, she’d pretty much be my dream girl, but that’s just cuz I like Bush and am over this whole Obama thing.

Posted in:Zelda Williams