I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

22

Dec

Samantha Ronson Makes 3 Million Dollars a Year of the Day

Everyone is freaking out about Samantha Ronson making 3,000,000 dollars a year as a DJ and claim that she’s only getting the 25,000 dollar a gig price because club promoters think she’s going to be carting Lohan around with her and is pretty much using Lohan to get the big payout, but bars and clubs are fucking sketchy business, run by the mafia to launder money and there’s tons of cash that needs to go around and get accounted to prevent people from going to jail, so people in the bar industry have always spent tons of money on various DJs, acts, parties, hosts, whatever, because they have tons of cash to do it, whether celebrities are involved in the mix or not….

Sure, more mainstream people know who she is now and care about who is DJing the party more than they used to, but that’s why these celeb DJs exist. People don’t know if someone can mix a record together well or not, they care about who is mixing that record and if they recognize any of the songs the DJ is playing so they can get on the table and dance around like idiots while singing along….

I snuck into a Ronson party last year when they were just rumored being together and shit was fucking packed with chachi motherfuckers who bought bottle after fucking bottle in some sea of cheese that made me want to kill myself, and that made the club a couple hundred thousand dollars, so why shouldn’t the DJ who people came out to see, see some of that money since the club was pushing her as “Lohan’s possible Girlfriend” to sell tickets. Seems fair to me….

A few years ago, DJ AM was in town and he got paid over 100,000 dollars to play one night with Nicole Richie when they were fucking, and he also has a million dollar deal with a Vegas club to play on a weekly basis. That’s 1 million dollars to work one day a week for a year. He also owns two night clubs and a management company that represents a bunch of these celeb/mainstream DJs who all get paid between 10k and 30k a gig, depending on when and where. So he laughs at the 3,000,000 dollars Ronson makes, while counting the 15 or 20 million dollars he probably makes doing the same thing….

I know this because a promoter wanted to organize a birthday party for the site, and I wanted celebrity DJs there because I thought it would be funny to throw shit at them while they DJed and not getting kicked out since it was my fucking party and I’ll throw ice at the overpriced celebrity DJ if I want to, so I reached out to the booking agents, and the cheapest quote I got was 15,000 dollars for any of them on an off night, like a Sunday or Monday. So instead of getting the funding to throw pies at AM while he Djayed, the idea was flushed down the toilet.

So these people make fucking bank,they party and drink all night, play music, fuck hot chicks and travel the world and people come out to dance to their boring, sweet sixteen, mainstream sets, but at least they are doing something for the party, unlike the time Paris Hilton came to town, she got paid 80,000 dollars and a bunch of coke to show up to an event, Hilary Duff, Christina Aguilera, Tila Tequila, Kim Kardashian, Pam Anderson, Marissa Miller, P Diddy, and a lot more celebs have rolled through here and they all cost more than 25,000 dollars a night and they just sit around for an hour pretending to drink before heading back to the hotel, so to put it all in perspective, it’s really not all that crazy, even if 95% of their sets is playing other people’s music….and what it all comes down to is that we’re idiots struggling to pay our rent because we didn’t have the foresight to get on this DJ train and date a celebrity of our owne, while Ronson laughs her way to the bank….

Posted in:DJ|Samantha Ronson

2008

22

Dec

Pam Anderson’s Short Shorts at the Airport of the Day

So Pam Anderson was at the airport this weekend, but I don’t really know whether these pics are actually recent or not, as I gave up on tracking Pamela Anderson’s activity a solid 10 years ago, when she was still solid, and not slowly melting away, like she is in these pictures. I do know that her shorts are pretty fucking short, like she’s trying to squeeze into her favorite pair of white pants from 6th grade, but I haven’t really got any problem with it, because unlike the 6th grade, I know she doesn’t have to worry about getting her period in front of everyone in a pair of white pants, scarring her, because her menopausal vagina doesn’t it’s period any more….

Not that it matters, what does matter is that Pam Anderson isn’t the only one going on vacation for the Holidays, because these shorts seem to be doing a little traveling of their own, only instead of visiting family or a tropical beautiful place, they are visiting a third worlds, diseased, polluted hell…one I wouldn’t mind getting knee deep into because when push comes to shove, I don’t really mind aging cunt as much as I pretend I do.

Posted in:Ass|Pam Anderson|Shorts

2008

22

Dec

Rihanna and Chris Brown and Their Matching Star Tattoos of the Day

Chris Brown and RIhanna have pretty similar tattoos of stars near their ears. From my experience it’s always a good idea to permanently stain yourself with something that will always remind you of the glorious time you spent together, especially after you get your fucking heart broken and even the most simple things remind you of how much of a fucking cunt that bitch was for leaving me alone to fend for myself after I gave her my heart and everything else I possibly could, but that wasn’t good enough for her, a hotter, richer, more interesting person with a promise of a better life came along and left me in the fucking gutter with no choice but to drink and hate. You know, leaving you alone in the bathroom with a knife to your ear about to Van Gogh your motherfucking self to show that fucking cunt you don’t need them anymore, it’s a hell of a lot more dramatic than burning their belongings.

Posted in:Chris Brown|Inked|Rihanna

2008

22

Dec

The Sham-Wow Guy’s Got a New Commercial of the Day

This guy’s a fucking legend and that’s all that needs to be said about him. I can watch his informercial dance for days on end, it never gets dull, so I got pretty excited when I was emailed his new informercial, because I don’t have a TV so I can’t stay on top of his beautiful career. Sure he doesn’t yell at the camera guy this time around, but he does tell us that we’ll love his nuts and that’s good enough for me.

Posted in:Infomercial|Sham-Wow

2008

22

Dec

Alicia Keys Rocks a Bikini of the Day

I was with a guy this weekend who wanted to sew his girlfriend’s pussy shut because he was going out of town for a week, he actually showed me a print-out on how to do the stitches that he found in some medical journal, his only concern was that when he was away, she’d cheat on him with a doctor, who could re-stitch her up and he wouldn’t be the realzing that her shit was tampered with, so I spent an hour listening to him craft a signature knot no one would pick up on but him..not that Alicia Keys has to worry about that because I hear she has testicles, but for some reason insists on wearing a woman’s bikini….I’ll never really grasp this cross dressing shit, but I will suck on cross-dressin’ tits, or get cross-dressing blowjobs, but only if I’m drunk and don’t realize a dick’s attached. True story.

To See the Rest of the Pics Because I Don’t Want to Get Sued Over This Beast…Follow This Link…
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Posted in:Alicia Keys|Bikini

2008

22

Dec

Stephanie Seymour is One The Beach Showin’ Off Her Ass of the Day

Sure Stephanie Seymour is a bit of a slut. She’s dated married men since she was 16, she has kids with different daddies like she lives in the projects, but along with using her pussy to get ahead, to get what she wanted and to feel validated, she also used it as some kind of weapon or martyr to destroy Guns N’ Roses and for that, she’s a fucking hero.

I hate Guns N’ Roses, they are one of the most over-rated bands, especially if you’re talking to a 30 year old who hasn’t broken free from the High School glory days and while working as a septic tank cleaner or heating/air conditioning repair man, or some other menial shit he hates doing and doesn’t understand how he got there, who sneaks out to the garage or the compay truck on break to crank up Appetite for Destruction where he closes his eyes, remembering a simpler time, before kids, mortgages, work and a needy wife, you know when all he needed to be happy was just his long hair, a case of beer, a pack of cigarettes a couple buddies, some titties and some Guns N’ fuckin’ Roses on the stereo.

I hate those people, because they don’t realize they are idiots, who fell in love with this band because of marketing and not because they are a good fucking band, and if Guns N’ Roses were legends like these assholes I meet all the fucking time, with the ROSE tattoo on their chest claim they are, and weren’t just a commercial mainstream band like they actually were, their careers wouldn’t have ended in ’92.

So to those people, I think it’s time for you to move the fuck on, and the first step in recovery is forgiving this bitch for what she did to you by taking away your one true love…

To the rest of you, just remember she is the mom of a 16 year old, and your mom didn’t look like this when you were 16 and that’s the whole reason her pussy is a weapon.

To See the Rest of the Pics Because I Don’t Want to Get Sued Over This Slut…Follow This Link…
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Posted in:Ass|Bathing Suit|Beach|Stephanie Seymour

2008

22

Dec

Amy Winehouse Topless on the Beach of the Day

I love Amy Winehouse. Mainly because she’s the only living celebrity I can actually imagine fucking because she looks like most of the whores I’ve been with. I also like that she’s down to get fucked up and have a good time, and most importantly, I like that she satisfies my necorphilia fetish by making me feel like I’m jerking off to a rotting dead person, without actually having to jerk off to a rotting dead person, because that would be weird, like all those lonely nights spent getting laid in the Coma ward at the hospital…

Not sure where I’m going with this, so go check out Winehouse’s Talented Jewish crack-tits because they are pretty jacked for someone who’s got an Ethiopian starving baby belly and a serious drug addicted-concentration camp – emaciated – self-destructed physique, which is a miracle just a little less impressive than the fact that she’s still alive.


To See the Rest of the Pics Because I Don’t Want to Get Sued Over this Slag…Follow This Link….
GO

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Topless

2008

19

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

So I went Christmas shopping today it was fucking crazy. People everywhere and by people I mean girls in leggings. It was a good time and I got myself an amazing gift…2 cans of beans. I have a limited budget and she loves eating so I’m sure she’ll be disappointed like every year, even though I put so much thought into the shit. I am joking, I don’t bother getting my wife a gift, I just went shopping to scope out young pussy and it was a success…

Here are some links to get you through this cold, dark, lonely Christmas season….


Personal Pornstars Who do What You Tell Them…
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Lisa Rinna To Do Playboy…
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A Wii Idiot….
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Jennifer Ellison is Topless in Nuts
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Katie Holmes Has Herpes on her Face Again….
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Jennifer Aniston Semi Panty Upskirt on Letterman
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Mariah Carey Braless Throwback
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Hugh Jackman Talks Wolverine
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Miss England Does a Striptease
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Star Wars vs Bush vs Shoe Throw-gate
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Best Bikini 2008
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These Babes Wanna Show You Their Happy Home
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The Macelet!!
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The Art of Meeting Men
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Find a Girl to Fuck, Because, Well, Why Not?
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This is My Wife’s Real X-Mas Gift
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Christina Agilera, WTF Are You Wearing?
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Here’s a Bunch of Sluts at Some Event or Another
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Pete Doherty’s Arm Exploded…Thanks Heroin…
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Some Naked Shaved Girl With Big Tits Takes a Shower…
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Paris Hilton Gets Robbed of 2,000,000 Dollars Of Stuff Because She Doesn’t Lock Her Front Door Ever, Hoping To Get Raped
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December Music Reviews in 20 Words or Less
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The Cheetah Lady is Fucking Crazy
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Merry Christmas You Fucks
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Slumber Party Cat Fight
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Zip Line Fail
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Tabitha Tan is Lovely
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Who Wouldn’t Want to Dry Hump Their Teacher?
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Bad Santas
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Cheryl Burke is Nasty and Not in a Good Way
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The Price is Exactly Right….
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The Gayest Moments in Sports
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This WIll Get You Laid…It is That Simple
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A Dog Jerking Off Weirdness
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A Burger King Christmas Carol
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Lovely Lovely Teen
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Brooke Hogan is Just Trashy
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Christina Milian Gets Her Fake Tan On
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Tanya Robinson is Naked
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Here’s a Stampede of Dolphins…
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Meet the Governer (Some of You May be Too Stupid to Get This)
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Anyone Can Get a TV Show
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Just Plain Sexy
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Playboy Babe Will Make Friday Better
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Cop Hits Deer
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Marisa Tomei’s Greatest Nude Scenes
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Some Video Game Girls You’d Probably Fuck if they Were Real People and Not Videogame Characters.
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Shannen Doherty Looks Like a Fucking Mess With Hairy Arms…
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I get harassing emails from this record label to promote their artist, here’s a link to their myspace, listen to it
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Count the Titty Bounce On an Israeli Beach
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Hilary Duff is Not a Virgin
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Plane Hits Cow Video
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There’s a Cockberg Right Ahead
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Titty Boxing
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS…

Oh Shit…Fat Chick Erotical Amazingness…
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Some Power Cleavage….
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Dog Does the Beyonce Dance Better than Beyonce….

Some Girl With Big TIts Playing with her Big Tits….to make up for that Beyonce Shit…

UPDATE – VIDEO OF SOME GIRLS FIGHTING, LOSING A WEAVE, AND SHOWING A BALD HEAD….


Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

19

Dec

Some Katy Perry Cleavage of the Day

Katy Perry claims she has DD tits and I’ve had DD tits in my mouth a few times and I think it’s safe to say that these aren’t DDs, not that a girl’s tit size really matters, because every DD I’ve had have been offensively big and pretty much hung like you’d expect them to and had an ass to match, so instead of getting excited enough to play with them, I kinda just went through the motions and would fake orgasms to end the aubse to myself. Now, maybe Katy Perry’s was a fat chick with DDs, because she looks like she’s got that kind of potential, but the touring, partying and pressure of the media’s keeping her in check, but when the 5 minutes are over, I figure she’ll slow down and go back to the couch to eat bag after bag of chips where she belongs because she’s not hot and her songs are irritating…..

Posted in:Katy Perry|Tits

2008

19

Dec

Lily Allen in a See Through Stomach Exposing Top of the Day

So Lily Allen decided to bust out her classiest Jackie-O outfit and hit the streets showing the world her barren stomach. I get a lot of hate for laughing about her miscarriage because I don’t think she actually had one and if I am wrong, which I don’t think I am, she was drinking and smoking and pretty much was responsible for that shit. So when I say things like “here she is walking without her baby because it was never born”, or if I say “here are her nipples making an appearance hoping to find the baby they were hormonally ready for before it was rudely taken from them”, or when I say “her body still looks 4 months pregnant, maybe she pulled the miscarriage out of the toilet and stuffed it back in her because she can’t accept the loss just yet”, I don’t mean to offend all the people out there trying to have babies but instead are dealing with constant disappointment and sadness because their bodies aren’t taking shit well, I do mean to offend Lily Allen for being an irresponsible fat chick who would have made a horrible parent and probably made the right choice, but we can still laugh about it because I know no tears were shed over this, maybe just minor inconvenience.

Either way, here she is showing off her body and I must be horny becaue I find these pictures kinda hot, but in my defense, I find a lot of disgusting things hot.

Posted in:Lily Allen|See Through|Stomach