I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

30

Jul

Britney Spears Riding Horses of the Day

The funny thing about seeing Britney riding a horse in Cabo has nothing to do with beastiality, but more with her finally knowing what every guy that fucked her in the fat, depressed, unwashed years felt like, if anything the only difference about the Horse and Britney at her worst is that when the horse pisses and shits itself, it doesn’t make a mess of the bed sheets.

These pictures reminded me of something that happened yesterday. I was sitting on the stoop minding my own business and some chick rides up to me on a bike. She tells me that she forgot her lock and needs someone to watch her shit. I told her that I would be sitting there for a while, because I have nothing better to do, but I am not someone she should trust, because if the offer comes up I will sell it for drug money. She left it with me anyway and I thought of all the different ways I could get back at her for giving me this repsonsibility. I could give it away or put a sign on it that says “take me”, I could hide it, or I could take the air out of the tires to just be a dick. Instead I convinced my pervert friend who I was with to sniff the seat when she came to get the bike, just to make her feel awkward about the whole thing so he did it and I laughed.

Posted in:Britney Spears|Horses

2008

30

Jul

Whoopi Goldberg’s Erotic Moment of the Day

Some people like porn to get off, other people need to get off doing werider things like parking their cars outside of the park, some lonely people may like phone sex and girls tend to like lay in bed at night before bed with all their erotic fantasies rolling through their head to get off, but I need The View to get me going….the reason is simple, that goddess Whoopi Goldberg is on it and she always brings the sex. She is open, honest and confident about her sexuality which is amazing considering no one else in the world is comfortable with her sexuality. We never quite know what we are looking at or whether she is a she and not a he and if she is a she than does she get down with other girls or does she get down with dudes and with every day she spends on The View, the more we get a glimpse into her magical panties.

Today she tells the world that in her lifetime she’s had 50 cocks, that probably sounds worse than it is. Because to conservative America, you know people who like to look down on other girls who like to have fun by havingsex with a bunch of people, because they were too busy getting married to their high school sweetheart only to pop the cherry on their wedding night, because they are traditional like that and believe that’s how God wants it, only to live a miserable repressed life with an abusive husband who fucks hookers every chance he gets because he committed to this boring, fat woman who dreams about sex with her favorite soap stars because she never expected shit to get as bad as it did, but the truth is that I know girls who are 19 and have had more partners in a week than Whoopi has had in a lifetime.

That doesn’t really take away how fuckin sexy it is to think about Whoopi’s thick hair, dry hands and purple tongue running up and down each and every one of those cocks, only to slowly take off her jeans and sneakers to let them in her magical place that is a mystery to the rest of the world. Those 50 men are like the first people to explore the North Pole, or the first people to the moon, because her genitals are one of the world’s great mysteries.

NOTE: I don’t have the video because the Networks are all suing the company that used to send me the video because they don’t like that people are monetizing on their shit, even if it’s just writing about a segment that we saw on TV or something funny that happened on their network that they pollute our homes with. It’s like we can watch the shit, talk about the shit, but we can’t share the shit or ABC, FOX, NBC, CBS get mad and sue with their deep pockets, pockets made deep because of us, the same people they are suing…cocksuckers.

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Whoopi Goldberg’s 1st Erotic Moment
Whoopi Goldberg’s 2nd Erotic Moment
Whoopi Goldberg’s 3rd Erotic Moment
Whoopi Goldberg’s 4th Erotic Moment
Whoopi Goldberg’s 5th Erotic Moment

Posted in:Erotic Moment|Whoopi Goldberg

2008

30

Jul

Marisa Miller is Greasy in a Bikini of the Day

I don’t have a thing for greasy girls who sweat. Sure there was a time when there was nothing more that I wanted than to have hot sweaty sex in the middle of the summer with a tight bodied blonde bikini model, but I am older now and I am more into girls who shower and look clean. It’s probably got to do with having an obese wife who always sweats and it’s come to the point where the list of top 5 things she does on the daily are eating, sweating, sleeping, sitting, shitting and making a fuckin mess in the process that’s lead to bugs in the shit hole apartment, something we’ve avoided up until now. So there’s really nothing inspiring about any of those things except to other fat people who see it as encouragment to not finish that extra large pizza for fear of dying and missing out on those 5 amazing things that got them in this mess in the first place.

The truth is that her greasy skin glisten wouldn’t be so vile, if it didn’t smell like feces, but it does, so seeing Marisa Miller, someone I am not even that in to, greased up makes me think of my wife eating french fries and a burger and breaking a sweat from the strain it’s putting on her heart as the juices drip down her cleavage and that doesn’t turn me on but it probably turns you on because you love cleavage.

Either way, here’s Marisa Miller greased up like a fat chick. I feel like I’ve already posted these pics.

Posted in:Greasy|Marisa Miller

2008

30

Jul

Carmen Electra is the Grandma Stripper of the Day

In my worldly travels to the local strip club, I once met a 65 year old strippers with massive tits who was still working the pole. Her shit was pretty boring, her ass was flabby and her flexibility was barely there, but she had hot old lady tits that I knew had seen so many hands and mouths that I just had to have a run with her. I decided to take her into the booth and grab her tits and do what you do, maybe because I don’t have a grandmother or maybe it was just because I wanted to see how a seasoned veteran performs. It turned out to be a fuckin’ disaster. She couldn’t get into any hot positions because her body wouldn’t let her and she she was too busy struggling to get her clothes off for me to get hard for those ridiculous tits only menopause could make and the whole thing reminded me of a fuckin’ old timers softball/hockey/basketball game where these old pros come out to play with everyday people and end up suckin’ harder than the everyday people suck because they are tired and sore. I guess the highlight of the whole thing was when her incontinence lead her to squirting piss on my legs after squatting over me, I didn’t get mad because bladder control’s totally overrated anyway…..

Point is that I predict a similar future for Carmen Electra, but at least she’s doing her best flaunting what she’s still got….

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

30

Jul

Adriana Lima Poses with Bras of the Day

Adriana was kidnapped from her tribe in Brazil by Victoria’s Secret who have people recruiting models from all parts of the world and by recruiting I mean kidnapping, which is pretty smart considering tribes don’t have phones or internet to contact the outside world and file a missing person’s report.

I was told that her deal is going to spend as much time with the brand as she can before she gets old, battered and they send her back to where she’s from. I guess it’s a good trade off, because she gets to travel the world, live in luxury and have guys everywhere masturbate to her and that’s a whole lot more appealing than dancing around a fire eating bananas, even if shit’s not forever it’ll make for exciting stories for the tribe’s people when she comes back in a few years with her grass skirt and coconut top on, that Victoria’s Secret has put aside for her so that it looks like she never left but I predict that she sneaks in one of her bras for them to worship as some kind of icon sent from above.

Either way, here she is doing what she was kidnapped to do and that’s promote everything and anything Victoria’s Secret.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

30

Jul

Heidi Range Rocks a Bikini of the Day



Some average at best popstar from the band Sugarbabes in the UK was out in a bikini and was shameless pullin’ a Lohan by having her best friend undo her bikini top because it’s just so fuckin’ hard to reach it herself, then pulled a Miley by taking slutty pictures of each other posing in a pool for the boy she is seeing and it all went over pretty well with me, because I come from the school that all girls are into pussy and all girls and their best friends moderately dyke out and are in love with each other, I’m talking gentle touching and kissing and showering together, and checking out and comparing their naked bodies with each other but never fully embracing the double sided dildo and lesbianism, but still doing things that make their boyfriends’ masturbation fantasies more believable.. I don’t say that because it’s a fantasy, I say it cuz it’s the truth.

Speakin of fantasies, I decided to go to the rich part of town to see what rich girls look like in person. I walked into the coffee shop where they all hang out and this dude who I see in my neighborhood begging for change was sitting at a table reading Wall Street Journal and sipping expensive italian coffee. I was fuckin’ mad that I’ve been throwing quarters his way the last 4 years, thinking he was more hurting than me, and in all honesty was doing it for selfish reasons, like it made me feel good that someone was worse off than me and throwing money at him, even though it wasn’t much was probably the same feeling a rich person gets when they buy a Bentley with cash. So I go up to him and call the fucker out and it turns out motherfucker’s just a con artist from a rich family who panhandles for entertainment purposes and really lives in a big house and drives a nice car and it made me feel like a fuckin’ asshole, but the good news is that he gave me 20 dollars for always hookin’ him up and asked me to keep things on the downlow and I am really that inexpensive to win over…..

Here’s this Heidi bitch and her bikini.

Posted in:Bikini|Heidi Range

2008

30

Jul

Bar Rafaeli is in a Bikini of the Day

On the surface Bar Rafaeli is a good looking, bikini ready and bikini wearing model with a pretty hot body, but that’s all white wash because under this pink bikini lives a Jew. I love how everyone thinks I am an anti-semite because I say that Jewish girls aren’t hot 99% of the fucking time. Even Jewish guys I know agree with me and their own mother’s are Jewish so I don’t really get what the big deal is.

Speaking of Jews, a Jewish friend of mine, yeah I know, no Jew is a friend to anyone, told me today that he just got out of the Hospital for mennigitis, which is a pretty serious thing to come out of the hospital for. I went on to tell him that he didn’t get that shit from drinking out of puddles or sleeping with dirty girls, but because it’s God’s wrath for being a Jew. He didn’t find it funny and went on to call me an anti-semite too. You just can’t win with these people, one minute they are trying to rip you off and the next are crying about the holocaust, get over it people, if it wasn’t for the Holocaust, Israeli Bar Rafaeli wouldn’t exist so you can thank Hitler for these titties…

Posted in:Bar Rafaeli|Bikini

2008

30

Jul

Necro’s Who’s Your Daddy Video of the Video of the DayNecro’s Who’s Your Daddy Video of the Video of the Day

A few years ago, I posted a Necro in Montreal Video , where he pulled a girl from the audience up on stage and took her shirt off in front of the crowd then humped her o while her boyfriend watched.

Dude’s music was almost appealing 8 years ago when I first heard it and I thought it was funny, he was vulgar and said some pretty disgusting things that made me laugh, but his shit got tired fast and I couldn’t even stomach to hear his voice and lame rhymes about making vaginas bleed with his big dick. Then I found out he was just a Jewish kid from New York crying for attention because his older brother was more successful than him and this was his lame attempt to get noticed.

Either way, I guess I wasn’t the only one who felt like Necro was bullshit, because he pretty much fell off the map, got fat and continued to do shitty projects no one cared about.

Here is his video for a song called Who’s Your Daddy, a song I feel like I heard when I listened to his shit for a week 8 years ago, but I guess it’s never too late to make a video…. It has some cameos from Ron Jeremy and Max Hardcore and some porn sluts and it’s obviously one of those “get girls naked and people will watch” videos that brain washes us into listening to shitty songs just to see the pussy.

The funniest thing about the whole thing is how much of a pussy Necro looks in it. He sings like he is so hardcore and misongynistic and demented and as he drops lines about shoving a gun in a cunt and accidentally shooting the bitch, shitting on a bitch and pissing in her mouth, fucking a bitch in ass til her colon falls out all while calling himself the sexxxorcist because he’s so crafty, motherfucker is all while gently touching, rubbing and french kissing hired pornstars like they were his fragile virgin girlfriends and virgins I know have been more aggressive with sluts they are paying to fuck…

The whole thing reminds me of this really lonely friend I had, who treated actual prostitutes like he was in love with them and we’d laugh at him because he’d be giving them massages and shit while the rest of us were trying to convince her to let us all cum her face at the same time. All this is to say, that Necro’s lyrics are lies, his video is bullshit and his career is a fucking joke but all music videos that show vagina get posted here so enjoy.

We can only hope this kinda shit slowly makes it into the mainstream because watching Ashley Simpson or Miley Cyrus or High School Musical sprawled out, sucking dick and topless would be the only thing that would make their next videos worth watching….

Posted in:Necro|Video|Who's Your Daddy

2008

30

Jul

Judge Judy’s Earthquake Reaction of the Day

I used to watch Judge Judy when I had a TV, I don’t know why because she’s kind of an irritating Jewish woman who is too judgmental to be a judge, that may not make sense, but bitch would bring her own bias and opinion about the cases to the courtroom making the entire case a fucking joke and it was fun watching her and her unjust courtroom. The cameras were rolling during the Earthquake and this video is funny.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

30

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

I decided that I want to go to the MTV Awards in September, if you or someone you know work at a hotel, airline and most importantly MTV, email me because I think it would be a good opportunity to suicide bomb and by suicide bomb, I mean have sex with some herpes ridden celebrities and video tape that shit. I know you are all useless, but I figured I’d put it out there, I’d only like to put my links for the day out there, even though I am slow moving tonight….

Tila Tequila in a Cover Release Party Video
GO

Shia Lebouf’s Mom is a Hot Piece
GO

Some Stills From Jenna Jameson Having an Abortion
GO

Kim Kardasiahn Accused of Being a Dirty Whore Because She Fucks Black Dudes….
GO

Joss Stone Flashes Her Panties Because She Nees to Sell Records Somehow
GO

Superhero Fight of the Century!!! – VIDEO
GO

Rihanna’s New Hot VIdeo for Disturbia….
GO

10 Hottest VIdeos of Boobs Rubbed in Oil
GO

Michelle Trachtenberg Flauntin’ Her Tits
GO

Porn Stars Enjoy Sitting In Bed Talking About Video Games
GO

Top 50 Universities Based on Looks….
GO

Blake Lively Shows Off her Gossip Girl Tits Again…
GO

Which Comic Slut Would You Rather Bang?
GO

Fuck with the TSA.
GO

My Favorite Reader performs for you:
GO

CHRISTY HEMME IS A SLUT….
GO

More Israeli Famous Sluts in Bikinis for the Jews
GO

Some Canadian Brown Chick is a Slutty Model
GO

David Beckham Molests Kids
GO

Ana Lucia Dominguez Will Make You Cause a Mess In Your Pants
GO

Bowling Ball Versus Car = Epic
GO

All the Women You Need Are Right Here, And It’s 100% More Than You Are Getting Right Npw. Fag.
GO

The BEst Porn on the Net, Period
GO

Policeman Owned at Soccer Game
GO

Piece of Shit Video From Girlicious, But They Are Half Naked, So Whatever
GO

A World Where Skaters MAke All Their Tricks Is Nor a World I Want to Live In
GO

Naked Summer Fun At a Party That People Like You And I Don’t Get Invited To
GO

Find Girls to Fuck, Because Sex is More Fun When Someone Else is There
GO

Evelyn Lory = Boners
GO

YES MAN Looks Like It Could Be a Pretty Sweet Life to Lead
GO

Teen Hotties Get it On
GO

Ryan Seacrest Gets Attacked By a Shark at a Gay Club…
GO

Linda Hogam is Most Probably The Worst Mom Ever
GO

Mortal Kombat VS DC Universe Game Play
GO

Vintage StepTV You Should Watch Because It Is Amazing
GO

Rachael Ray to Come OUt With Line of Gourmet Entrees Inspired By Her Own Diet
GO

Don’t Gamble with Marijuana!!!
GO

Leighton Meester Needs to Pull That Dress Up Just a Little Higher
GO

Thanks God Pam Anderson Wasn’t Cast in the Role of Scully
GO

Cute Teen Amateur
GO

Erin Avery Shows Off
GO

Use This to Get Sex, and Lose That Pesky Viginity Once and For All
GO

And Now, The Biggest Vagina in Porn
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Gabriela Vergara Looks HOT In Her Yelloow Dress
GO

Charity Babes Make You Wanna Join the Cause
GO

JLO Needs to Learn That It’s Time to Hang Her Saddle Bags Up for Good
GO

Shyla Jennings Plays with Herself
GO

Luz Elena Gonzalez is Fully Bangable
GO

In Case You Missed It – Bert and Ernie GEt Gangsta On Your Ass!
GO

If My Local Church Was This Exciting, I Would Go There Everyday
GO

Fuckin Hippies
GO

Patrick Swayze – “I’m Not Dead Yet!”
GO

Michelle Marsh is Naked
GO

The NYPD Needs to Relax a Little
GO

If Only Going to Work Was This Much Fun Everyday
GO

Remove scratches on an LCD or CD with an egg
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Some Girl Masturbates for You in VIdeo
GO

Some Slut
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS