I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

26

May

Pink is a Lesbian on a Motorcycle of the Day

*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*

It’d be obvious to talk about how girls with motorbikes are all lesbians and that Pink isn’t actually a lesbian but a man on a motorcycle because she likes the way it vibrates on her balls, but I don’t think there’s any proof that this bitch eats pussy, other than the way she looks, and who really cares if she fucks girls with her oversized clit, it doesn’t really change anything in my life.

The truth is that I love girls who ride motorbikes, they look like they’d be down to fuck, it’s the kind of roughness you want in a woman. I am not talking about 300 pound women in chaps who scratch their asses, I am talking about the ones in tight leather catsuits with their tits busting out of her top while riding their bikes. That’s the masculinity you want in a woman, not only can she fix your carb and likes adventure, but also likes to fuck because of the constant vibration on her cunt making her always horny. Women are the keepers of sex and usually not always horny and need to be stroked the right way to get up in them, and I guess if they are more like dudes on the inside and not at all like dudes on the outside the relationship will involve beer drinking, lots of sex and a lot less headaches.

Here’s Pink riding her bike, lookin like a man.

*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*
*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*
*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*
*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*
*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*
*Images removed in compliance with DMCA*

Posted in:Lesbian|Motorcycle|Pink

2008

26

May

Lindsay Lohan’s in France with a Little Up Her Pants of the Day

I was hanging out at the coffee shop because I had no money to go out and do anything worth doing and felt like watching teenage girls drink their 1000 calorie blended coffee drinks knowing that if they keep up that habit they will be 200 pounds by the time they are 20 so that they better fuckin’ enjoy their Chocolate Chip overpriced Frap now, while their rich skinny teenage asses can afford it because it’s all down hill for them

There was a group of insecure 15 year olds, the kind of girls who don’t get much male attention because they are slow developers and not really down with cock but are instead down with studying and watching Will Farrel movies. One was complaining about how her shirt is lowcut and how she never wears shirts that are that revealing, another one was complaining about how her hair always looks stupid. Then the one in a short skimpy dress, who I labeled the Lohan of the group came in with words of encouragement when she said that “boys love tits”. It’s that kind of inspirational words of wisdom that come out of a teenage girl that make me feel like Lohan’s done her job right.

Here are some pictures of her having an upskirt

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Panties|Upskirt

2008

26

May

The Baldwin Brothers are Drunk of the Day

You know – bros who shave together – stay together. I decided it was time to take out the camera this weekend while drunk. I haven’t done one of my legendary, academy award worthy stepTV clips in a long time and I realize I gotta bring that shit back to the site. In future, I hope shit’s a little better than this, but I like to think it’s part of the charm.

These are two bald guys getting pizza after a night drinking together, I wonder if they do more than just rock the same hair style together, like maybe they shave each other’s hard to reach areas because only they truly understand each other.

Posted in:Baldwin Brothers|stepTV

2008

24

May

stepLINKS of the Day

I was planning on doing more posts today, but I got distracted and thought it’d be funnier to leave you with my drunken Christian charity response making you wonder if I got killed by some fundamentalists, I didn’t despite knowing the dude who send me this email today probably hoped I did….

your life is crap

My response:

Thanks for the tip, I had no idea…it’s all I’ve ever known so I just thought everyone’s life was this bad, you’ve shown me the light and now I know that I should have jumped in front of traffic that time I contemplated doing it. Lucky for you, I enjoy this crap life because I always have something to laugh at. Today, that thing is you. Send Nudes.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

Here are some links to all things good on the internet today:

Watch Ninja Babe in Space Episode 3
GO

Terrance Howard Threatened to Kill His Daughter’s Boyfriend
GO

Teach A Slut a Lesson For Trying to Seduce You With a Lollipop to Get Her Way…
GO

Kim Kardashian Ralph Magazine Outtakes in Her Fat Chick Underwear
GO

Being in a Bikini is the Only Way Jennifer Aniston Can Keep a Boyfriend
GO

Krisztina Lajtai is Foreign and Fucking Hot
GO

Prank a Computer and Disable It Desktop Icons
GO

Nick Hogan’s Faggot Ass Prison Phone Call to His Mom – Cuz He’s a Bitch in More Ways than One
GO

The 10 Hottest Redhead Slut Topless Scenes
GO

Ana Nikolic Panty Upskirt On Stage
GO

Friday is as Good a Day For Live Sex on Webcam
GO

Kobe Bryant Dunks Over a Poll Full of Snakes
GO

Well, I Can Officially Say I Love Morgan Freemon
GO

Joanna Krupa Swimwear Gallery
GO

Charlotte Mears and Bianca Gascoigne are Sluts in their Bikinis
GO

Derek Jeter’s Long List of Sluts Who are Now His Sloppy Seconds…
GO

Here’s a Wet T-Shirt Special
GO

Photos of the captain of the Detroit Pistons Dance Team in College Smashing Tits and Kissing with her Slut Friends.
GO

Madonna Thinks of Herself as Handsome and Useful and by That She Meant Old and Ugly
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Naomi Campbell is Crying on her Birthday and It’s All Diddy’s Fault
GO

Ashley Tisdale Hits the Bottle
GO

Paula Abdul’s Jiggle Wiggle
GO

Your Friday Striptease
GO

Star Jones Suckin’ the One Thing She Likes Better than Gay Dick
GO

Ira Is From Russia and Shes 21 Years Old
GO

Brazillian Hottie with a Bangin Ass Body
GO

Vite Christopher Knight!
GO

Aishwarya Rai is Hotness
GO

Let’s Laugh at Japanese People Because They are Different and That is Funny
GO

Shay Laren Hangs OUt by the Stairs
GO

Tara Reid Dirty Bikini Throwback
GO

Shauna Sand TAkes her Ugly ASs for A Walk. Nice Legs Tho
GO

Cell Phone in a Microwave
GO

Pussycat Dolls on Jimmy Kimmel
GO

So Long As She’s Still Hot, Vida Guerra is Completely Relevant to ME
GO

Bandwagon Blues?
GO

Creepiest PSA Ever
GO

Naked Naked Girls Gallery
GO

Fox News Reporter : Courtney Frielís Sexy Bikini Photos
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Some Dude Talking about Anal Sex With Cars
GO

Water Bottle Woman Gets Water Bottled
GO

Find the Best Ass Sites on the Internet
GO

Cow Woman Gets Milked
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Some Hot Cleavage and Sheer Panties in Hot Suggestive Pics…
GO

Some Staged Tits
GO

Some Chick and Her Silk Nighty….
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

23

May

Juliette Lewis is in Her Bikini of the Day

I was talking to some dude about Juliette Lewis last night because she is his favorite celebrity. He finds her the most interesting, crazy and hottest chick out there. I argued that she’s just some art fag hipster but at least she’s not fat, then I realized that I was talking about celebrities in my spare time and realized that this shitty website has followed me into my everyday life and that annoys me.

I ended up at some club filled with 18 year old girls and found myself waiting in line, where some dude grabbed me and said “hey, it’s Jesus from the internet”, I instinctively punched him in the stomach because I didn’t know what his intentions were, but I do know that getting recognized by 19 year old dudes in clubs was not the purpose of starting this shit up, the purpose was to get hot chicks to email me compromising positions and I guess that makes me a failure.

Speaking of failure, here’s Juliette Lewis in a bikini for the dude I met who thinks she looks a lot to hang out with because she’s totally insane.

Posted in:Bikini|Juliette Lewis

2008

23

May

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are Friends of the Day

I don’t understand why people give a fuck whether these two are lovers or not, if anything it’s hot as fuck and not something to get all pissed off and punch the wall over, it’s not like you ever had the opportunity to get with Lohan in the first place and the truth is if you really believe, as you print off ever picture you’ve ever seen of her to staple on your wall, and watch every DVD she’s ever been in every night before bed, you can still live out the fantasy of that when she goes back to men, you’ll be the one she chooses.

The point is that seeing a girl with another dude leads to a girl getting married and pregnant and leaving no chance for you to move in, but a girl with another girl always leaves the dream of an open door for another dude to come in and sweep her off her feet. Unfortunately, for me, that guy won’t be me, but I am fully supportive of this union but that’s just because I love watching girls go down on each other. I’m a guy like that.

I feel like I should be the dude getting off (the plane) with them, but that’s not going to happen because apparently the guy I met last night who looks like Sam Ronson thinks I have no chance and I believe him because he seems like an authority on tight jeans, sneakers and funny hats and knows what his people like.

Posted in:Friends|Lindsay Lohan|Samantha Ronson

2008

23

May

Petra Nemcova’s Got Some Big Aids Tits of the Day

Petra Nemcova brought her tits out to an Aids charity because she knows the one thing people with Aids want to see is a hot set of tits they can’t fuck because girls like Petra don’t like having sex with dude’s who have Aids. Not to mention most dudes with Aids are gay and those who aren’t are for the most part stuck banging the ex-heroin addict crackwhores no one wants because hot put together chicks Aids are hard to find.

Not that Petra really needs to worry because no one with Aids will actually be at the event. Their disease just funded it for celebrities to show off how much they care and probably cost millions of dollars to produce all paid for with money donated to the chairty that would probably be better suited going to the cause than throwing parties for people who don’t eve have Aids, but do have a lot of unprotected sex. I guess it’s because celebrities don’t want to go to Aids parties with Aids patients because it’s a bad look for them, even though someone like Petra is from the Czech, which probably has the highest Aids rate in Europe since it’s got a pretty heavy sex and porn trade goin’ down there.

Either way, here are her tits.

Posted in:cleavage|Petra Nemcova|Tits

2008

23

May

Miley Cyrus’ Slutty Personal Pics of the Day

I still get hate mail every couple of days for calling this product of Disney a little slut who is lying to us because she doesn’t want it to ruin her career. So while she’s tingling in the pants to show all the cute boys in her class or neighborhood all the really exciting things the produces of Disney taught her how to do with her mouth every time she went to their office after hours to collect her paycheck and talk about future mutually beneficial endeavors, she has to pretend that she’s a church goer and when she’s retaining her virginity because it’s in her contract with Disney, she’s letting homies do her up the ass because it’s the grey area that won’t get her fired and taking slutty pics of herself for her internet boyfriends.

These are the pics and I am posting them because they aren’t naked and won’t get me arrested. It’s news motherfuckers, just call me Annie Lebovitz…because it’s safe to say that those half naked pics she took of Miley were Miley’s idea.

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|Personal Pics|Slut

2008

23

May

Sharon Stone’s In a Bikini of the Day

I was at a bar the other night and I suggested to the bar owner that we throw a weekly stepPARTY where we rip off the girls gone wild concept and market it as Spring Break beach party where girls show up in bikinis, have wet t-shirt contests and get it on with each other all while I drunkenly watch as the leader of the night because it’s my fuckin’ party.

The owner was interested but told me that it probably won’t be a hit because the only girl who goes in her bar is this one chick named Alice and she’s about 65, 300 pounds and is missing teeth, but bitch has no problem having drinking contests and showing her tits with the promise of a free shot and I told him that that sounds like a hit to me.

Here are some pictures of a thinner lookin’ 65 year old who still gets naked for money, but I doubt she’ll be coming to my party.

Posted in:Bikini|Sharon Stone

2008

23

May

Lindsay Lohan on Ugly Betty of the Day

You know what it comes down to is that I fucking love Lindsay Lohan and feel bad she had to embarrass herself by taking a job on Ugly Betty to satisfy her cocksuckin’ management and publicity people. The whole concept of Ugly Betty is completely against everything I stand for and I am not even that superficial of a person, proven in the fact that I have fucked really ugly girls, but seeing really ugly ethnically confused woman with big teeth on my TV just really fucks up my shit. I can’t really explain it, but I think the uglies should be saved for the bar when I am drunk and lonely and willing to take on any pussy and not or network television. The worst thing about this is that there are a ton of ugly girls in the world and they are supporting this show hard, because they can related leading to this bitch winning awards when she should just be winning herpes from the horny men who fuck them with a condom because they know they can’t get shit from their untouched pussies.

Either way, I support all of Lohan’s decisions, and despite this clip sucking, at least she got the ugly chick beat up from some balls, because let’s face it, these are probably the only balls smacking her in the face for a long time and Lohan is doing her a favor because she is a modern day saint in my books….

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Ugly Bety