I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

16

Apr

Elisha Cuthbert Does Maxim Topless of the Day

Elisha Cuthbert did Maxim and looks good but I pretty much have no interest in this Cuthbert. She’s from Montreal but has denounced Montreal, which I totally understand but since she thinks she’s too good for the city, whenever she comes back to visit her family who still lives here she acts like she’s god’s gift to the city, like she’s the biggest export that everyone should acknowledge when all she’s really done is one stupid teen move and a job on 24 which to me is substantially less successful than other Montreal exports like Celine Dion that bitch is my hero.

What I was trying to do was reach out to her sister because I heard she was worth fucking and more accessible since she’s trying to break free from her sister’s shadow. Girls her feel less relevant than their sisters are always willing to suck dick because they feel they deserve the attention. I once knew these sisters who were both pretty slutty, but the one who killed herself was the one who wasn’t molested by her father. She always felt like a second rate citizen to her sister who was obviously more desirable, at least in her mind because their dad chose her and that left some serious emotional trauma. I like the think that the Cuthbert sister is up on the same shit, but instead of their dad choosing Elisha, the rest of the world has and that’s some pretty serious shit to try to live up to and that’s why I am willing to hold her hand through the hard times.


To Read the Article on Cuthbert
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Posted in:Elisha Cuthbert|Maxim|Topless

2008

16

Apr

Kim Kardashian Takes on the Paparazzi of the Day

These are the fuckers I am up against and I am really not all that worried about taking each and everyone of them out. I am not threatening to kill them or anything psycho, cuz the photographers are not my enemy, it’s the people who they are working for who I don’t like. I figure the best way to ruin the paparazzi agency is to start up some kind of union to protect the workers rights as paparazzi photographers. I figure they are freelance, don’t have medical insurance and work long hours for shitty pay while making the same fuckers who run after me rich by giving them the rights to sell their photos. I know you don’t give a fuck about this quest to take these fuckers down, but I do know that I messaged Kim Kardashian awhile ago to help me take out these fuckers and it looks like she’s partnered up with someone else to do it because no one likes me.

At least she’s found a use for the cheap video camera skills that got her famous in the first place. This could be a glimpse into the future of Kim Kardashian when her 5 minutes of fame have dried up and the only person left caring about her is herself. That way she can feel like people still think she’s relevant by being her own paparazzi. I don’t know if she’ll be too good at running after herself without running out of breath and passing out from her emotional eating obesity, but it would be funny to watch her try to jump over a fence to get an exclusive picture of herself in her backyard, but that’s just cuz it’s always fun watching a fat guy struggle….

On a side note, it looks like she’s got some hip hop bling around her neck, and I guess her future also involves dating and getting knocked up by rappers (not rapists) and pro athletes….she’s got a fat ass like that.

Bonus – Paris Hilton’s Apology to Kim Kardashian for Saying Kardashian’s Ass is Fat
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Posted in:Kim Kardashian|Paparazzi

2008

16

Apr

Aubrey O’Day’s Got a Proper See Through Shit On of the Day

Aubrey O’Day is another slut who thinks she’s more important to the world than she actually is. She’s the kind of girl who catches her boyfriend watching some kind of Jenna Jameson porn and figures she can do that shit too, only instead of porn she does pop singing. She’s the kind of girl who all her life was told she was good enough to be the next Britney Spears but just couldn’t land a break until she saw the casting call from Making of the Band 3 – and then it all fell into place and by fall into to place I mean she’s got a D-List career that she tells herself is a stepping stone but will fizzle out as soon as Making of the Band 4 hits, but at least she knows to not wear bras to get more attention to herself. So maybe I’m wrong, maybe she’s here to stay, but that popularity or success won’t change the fact that she’s useless.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Nipples|See Through

2008

16

Apr

Kelly Ripa Is a Coke Slut of the Day

I am dying of some kind of cold that I don’t really understand where it came from, but seems to be the story of my fucking life. I think living amongst filth and rotting garbage is just not good for me and the last 5 years, I’ve had more nasal issues than a ratty coke slut who’s been railing lines of blow cut with shards of glass. I don’t know what it is but my sinuses bleed, are constantly congested and leave me with a more nasal voice that a Jewish kid with asthma, allergies and a deviated septum. I can’t ever speak properly and sound like a cross between a gay dude and duck and I’ve gone to the doctor with no real solution, so I just live with it.

What’s happened with this disability, is that I have found beauty in girls with no sinus problems and who have clear breathing passages. It’s my fetish. It’s like the fat chick dating the skinny dude, the short guy dating the tall girl, the white guy dating the black girl. It’s the whole opposites attract shit and there’s no website offering that kind of porn…but here is Kelly Ripa doing a close enough job for me to fall in love with her clear her sinuses, that little slut makes me want to fuck my chronic sinusitis into her and by chronic sinusitis, I mean semen.

In less interesting news – Heidi Montag was on the show dressed like a cheap fucking horse-faced prostitute wearing her very own line clothing.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

16

Apr

Nicole Scherzinger and Her See Through Shirt of the Day

Nicole Scherzinger See Through Bra

Bras are like outerwear now and sluts are paying big money for bras to wear as shirts under sheer shirts when they used to be something of function that few people actually saw. I guess since they are sluts, now bras are something of fashion and should give the world a taste of what they are convinced is their hot bodies. I am the kind of guy who hates bras, sure the shit makes tits look more full, bigger and gives the fuckers some serious cleavage, but I find all that a distraction of what’s actually worth lookin’ at and that’s hard nipples.

I don’t know when this whole wear lingerie as outerwear started, but I was at a party and saw some girl in some kind of lace corset the other day. I asked her why she was wearing her underwear as clothes, because everytime I go to the store in a pair of soiled underwear since I am too lazy to find pants to put on, I get dirty fuckin’ looks, but when she does the shit no one complains cuz she’s got big tits and guys just pretend they are sharing a private moment with her despite the fact that there are 1000s of people around them….and she just told me to fuck off and walked away.

The only real problem with her outfit was that she was wearing a bra under her see-through corset so that we wouldn’t be able to see her nipples. I figured if you’re going to wear it out in public, you gotta wear it how it’s meant to be worn. You shouldn’t do this half assed cover-up bullshit because you’re out in public, It is more of a fuckin’ headache and cock tease and makes me fucking hate you. It’s almost as bad as getting a stripper who has a g-string under her boy short underwear like some kind college girl who is insecure playing strip poker for the first time so she puts on the fuckin’ layers, only the stripper does it to keep the smells in.

I guess none of that really matters, and here’s Nicole Scherzinger in a see through top showing off her expensive bra intentionally……

Posted in:Bra|Nicole Scherzinger|See Through

2008

16

Apr

From the Forum of the Day

My stepLINKS were getting retardedly long – so I decided to split up the shit that was goin’ on in the forum and the shit that’s going on on other websites, they don’t belong together, like 2 men, it’s just unnatural. So I’ve decided to do this From the Forum post whenever I have enough shit going on in the Forum.

Everyone says I always have bad ideas, that I am redundant and a waste of motherfucking space, but today is the day I prove all those people wrong with this kind of genius, life changing idea for a post…

In case you hate Forums, because they aren’t Facebook or Myspace, they aren’t easy to navigate and they are for virgin losers with no friends, you’ll be surprised to find the good looking bunch of people who are already up on that shit and uploading tons of shit for your entertainment and shit. So check it out…

Here’s what’s going on in the Forum:

Pre-Release Melvins
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Interpol Black Sessions
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Stevie Wonder – Songs in the Key of Life
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The Edge of the Eighties
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Hyde-Out Productions Hip-Hop
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Gorillaz – Greatest Hits
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Kelly Rowland – Ms.Nelly 2007
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The Killers – Read My Mind
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Chingy – Hate it or Love it
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Interpol – Fukd ID #3
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Douglas Adams – The Salmon Of Doubt
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Give Us a Kiss
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Young with big knockers 1
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Young with big knockers 2
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Crissy Moran is not too shabby
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ASSSSSSS
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Flexible?
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Got MILF?
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NERO 8
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Starcraft Brood Wars
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Agent Orange Thread
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Monica Sweetheart is a Sweetheart
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More of the Raven Riley Mega Thread
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Chingy – Hate It or Love It
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Cat Power Thread
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The Milf Thread
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Hyde Out Productions – Hip Hop
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Lucy Thai
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Users Fight to Save Windows XP
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Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!
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Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

16

Apr

Kristen Bell is Boring on Letterman of the Day

I got so much hate mail about this Forgetting Sarah Marshall shit that I wish was actually about forgetting Sarah Silverman because she’s a fuckin’ stain on my brain that I’d love to forget….I got hate mail because I said that the only reason to see it is because Mila Kunis is hot. The hate mail came in from every loser who is hooked on Heroes and thinks Kristen Bell is the hot chick in the movie and that Mila Kunis is nothing compared to her.

Now I hate these kinds of debates because they make me realize how pathetic my life is, you know arguing about which girl I don’t know is hotter, it’s on some lame virgin shit that probably causes many debates in their virgin chat rooms online because they can’t focus on real girls but instead can invest all their time into fighting about sluts they see on TV.

That said, Kristen Bell was on Letterman last night and she’s nothing special. I tried to understand why you fuckers bothered sending me death threats over her, but all I could see was a normal lookin’ blonde chick who looks like every other blonde all American chick. She doesn’t have an amazing body and listening to her run her mouth off made me want to punch her in her thin barely there lips. Her sex appeal is not as high as whoever the fuck says she’s a better catch than Mila Kunis…and took the time to emails .it is however reminiscent of a 12 year old girl on the soccer team with the face of a 30 year old who is related to Kelly Ripa. I’d totally let her get naked for me, if it ever came to that and I’d watch her sex tape, but that’s not saying much considering I’d do the same for Whoopi Goldberg and pretty much anything disgusting with a Vagina because I am a pervert.

Posted in:Boring|Kristen Bell|Letterman

2008

16

Apr

Bill O’Reilly Goes After Bill Maher of the Day

I don’t watch TV because I don’t have a TV and can’t afford and TV and if I could afford a TV, I wouldn’t buy a TV because I’d rather put it in a savings account so that one day I’ll have enough money stashed away to escape this life.

People keep sending me clips of shit from TV and since I like to run my mouth about everything, I have no choice but to post them here.

I know nothing about BIll O’Reilly, but I do know about Bill Maher and he’s some dude who dates dirty black sluts like SuperHead, who he apparently treated like shit because he’s on some kind of power trip and thinks he’s so fuckin’ smart and she’s just nothing but a whore who sucks off basketball players and rap superstars, but that doesn’t matter, what does matter is the he rips into the Catholic church about being pedophiles on a huge scale and it’s kinda funny in an obvious way, but still funny.

I met a priest the other day because I wanted to repent my sins and figured what better way to beg for forgiveness than to try to find Jesus like most recovering addicts do. When I got there, I couldn’t help but ask him where his mustache was. I figure since he only really works on Sundays, he’s got a lot of downtime that could be used to tutor kids, coach little league since he’s not allowed to jerk off, which is something most guys do whenever they have a lot of downtime. He didn’t laugh but still told me the Jesus loves me which made me feel ok about making fun of everyone.

This Bill O’Reily dude is kind of right about the double standard and that the white Christian man is subject to a lot of abuse because they are the norm, but the second you rip into Jews, Fags, Blacks, Spics, Terrorists, Women, Native Americans, you have all these fuckin’ groups on your ass trying to shut you the fuck down for being an asshole. I firmly believe that we should be able to call Catholics pedophiles, White people boring, Black people criminals, Hispanics Lazy, Natives Gas Huffers, Jews Dog Faced Money Grubbing Accountants, Fags Unnatural, Lesbians Bitches who Wish They Had Penis so Instead Hate on Penis, Muslims terrorists and whatever other stereotype that makes you laugh. This shit isn’t hate, it’s just mass-generalizations and people need to stop taking themselves so seriously, including O’Reilly.

Posted in:Bill Maher|Bill O'Reilly

2008

15

Apr

stepLINKS of the Day

So I am at the grocery store buying my fat wife some chips because bitch is on some kind of diet that she pretends she saw on Oprah but is probably some kind of lie, because she’s been on it for 10 years and she’s fat as hell, so I guess it’s really just some kind of fat person diet which makes sense that she saw it on Oprah but that’s not the point.

So I run into my old neighbor’s daughter who I haven’t seen in years and she’s with some kind of lesbian now and she’s hanging with her lover and introduces to me as her lover, so I awkwardly slap the lover on the back and tell her that I could always tell she was a lesbian by the way she licked her ice cream….she just liked it too much but then again she was 4 and that’s when they gave me a dirty look and walked away.


Jodie Marsh Takes Off Layers of Sperm and Poses Without Make-Up
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Britney Spears May Release Her Video Diaries
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Don’t Worry, These Half Naked Party Sluts Won’t Talk to Me Either…That’s What GHB is For….
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Jenna Jameson’s Zombie Strippers Exclusive Clip
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Cheryl Tweedy’s Rack is Smokin’
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Use This To Get Laid, Because It Won’t Happen On It’s Own
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Hypnotize Chicken…Then Fuck it After
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In Case You Need a Little More Kim Kardashian
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A Gallery of Peeping Thongs, Because I know Shit Covered Pieces of String Get You Off
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Download Stills From the Marilyn Monroe Sex Tape HERE!
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Hours of Web Cam Fun with Webcam Sluts
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So This is What Girls Do For Fun? Kinda Gross…If You Ask Me…And I’m a Gross Motherfucker…
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Rock of Love Reunion Went Wrong…Or Right, Depending How You Look At It
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Pam Anderson Showing Off Her Huge Tits
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Some Sienna Miller in a Romper Like a 2 Year Old…Slut….
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Snoop Dogg is in Love With Leanna Rimes
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Some Vintage STD Ad….Syphilis is NOW Curable…
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Lucky Lucy is Some Blonde Slut Posing In Her G-String
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Paris Says Kim Kardashian Has Cottage Cheese Legs…and The Fight Begins….
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Pam Anderson Reading Some Kind of Corporate Porn….
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Miley Cyrus Jail Bait at the CMT Awards
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Lopez is Losing the Baby Weight Fast. Now If She Could Only Do Something About That Ass
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Mother of the Year
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Rio Heroes Ring Girls
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One More Chick That Could Kick Your Ass
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Spring Break Sluts
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Calandar Girls
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Some Mischa Barton Semi-Topless
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Micah Moore’s Gallery
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Lesbian Sex Fantasy of the Day
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Your Tuesday Porn Fix
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Well, It’s Official. Alba is Never Going to Be Hot Again…Here She is Sucking….
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Some Self Defense Bullshit Video
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Some Girl Attacks a Guy For Asking Her IF She Took Her Pussy to the Vet to Get Its Shots Video
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Some Insane Street Illusion Art
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2 Girls, 1 Cupcake
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Jelena Jensen Takes a Bath
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Brooklyn Decker’s Hot Gallery
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Naked on Ice
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Some Dude VIolently Attacks His Ex in Front of his New Girlfriend
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Some Dancing Cop Caught on Video
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Heidi Montag Thinks She’s a Rapper
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Irina Voronina Gallery
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That Amazing Scene From Showgirl
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The Sexiest Topless Babes
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Lily Allen Gets A Post-Miscarriage Haircut – It’s a New Trend
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Find Girls To Fuck You in the Way Your Own Hand Can’t
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Some TNA Wrestling Bitch Named Velvet Sky Lookin’ Like a Pornstar
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Some Girl Takes a Shower For You in Her Clothes
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Some Jojo Gallery for the Perverts
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET

Some Slag in her Underwear and Posing And Shit
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Some Breast Feeding Video
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BONUS – Dark Knight Alternate Ending I Didn’t Watch

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

15

Apr

Sophie Monk’s Got a Dumpy Ass of the Day

I guess I should have known that something wasn’t right with this Sophie Monk character. I was all excited about her a couple weeks ago but never even thought about the condition of her ass. The fact that she was with Good Charlotte was the worst I thought it could get, but I was able to pass that off as some kind of mistake since she’s a foreigner and maybe Good Charlotte is a big deal in Australia…like Hasselhoff was huge in Germany and I figured I couldn’t blame her for falling into a culturally confused decision…but now I see her ass and whatever the fuck she’s doing to it. It looks like she’s trying to hold in her shit by clenching and that’s making it look she’s already dumped out some mangled ground beef already and it makes me cry on the inside. You know, I don’t expect anyone to be perfect, but when you look this tight from the front, it’s a total downer to catch yourself wondering if that shit’s a tall skinny 95 year old from the back.

I still will say she’s a better catch than Paris Hilton and bad ass or not I’m still a fan, but now that she’s onto Ryan Seacrest, I think it’s safe to say that Sophie Monk is dead to me.

Bonus – Sophie Monk Showing Off Some Tit to Distract Us From Her Dumpy Ass

Posted in:Ass|Sophie Monk