DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2007

18

Apr

I am – Ashlee Simpson’s Boyfriend is Bi-Sexual of the Day

Have you ever heard of the AIDS virus? It’s some fucked up shit that spread in the Gay community in the 80s. The Gay community of the 80s was about 10 percent actual out of closet fags who were hair dressers and fashion designers another 10 percent of them were dudes who thought they were chicks or dressed like chicks and the 80 percent that were a mix of married men with normal jobs and normal families and secretly ventured out at night to fuck other men in back alleys and bisexual weirdos who were into art, fashion and cocaine. Part of the allure of being so bad was to bareback and next thing you know AIDS hits the straight community. If you’re wondering why I know this, it’s not because I am gay,but because I knew a lot of seedy fags in the 80s, because they used to have the best drugs and always knew slutty fag hags.

Either way, I made a point of never slamming a chick who had slammed a bisexual dude because I knew bisexual dudes got their dicks all AIDSed up doing what they do.

Unfortunately, every EMO kid is swings both fucking ways nowadays and there are less straight people in the world than there used to be and getting with any chick probably means she’s fucked a bi somewhere down the line because those greedy fucks want the best of both worlds and the whole Gay is trendy movement, but that doesn’t change the fact that Ashlee Simpson is officially on my blacklist and you should watch out for her, Baptists with Bi boyfriends are at high risk.

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Ashlee Simpson's Boyfriend is Bi-Sexual of the Day

No Comments »

Have you ever heard of the AIDS virus? It’s some fucked up shit that spread in the Gay community in the 80s. The Gay community of the 80s was about 10 percent actual out of closet fags who were hair dressers and fashion designers another 10 percent of them were dudes who thought they were chicks or dressed like chicks and the 80 percent that were a mix of married men with normal jobs and normal families and secretly ventured out at night to fuck other men in back alleys and bisexual weirdos who were into art, fashion and cocaine. Part of the allure of being so bad was to bareback and next thing you know AIDS hits the straight community. If you’re wondering why I know this, it’s not because I am gay,but because I knew a lot of seedy fags in the 80s, because they used to have the best drugs and always knew slutty fag hags.

Either way, I made a point of never slamming a chick who had slammed a bisexual dude because I knew bisexual dudes got their dicks all AIDSed up doing what they do.

Unfortunately, every EMO kid is swings both fucking ways nowadays and there are less straight people in the world than there used to be and getting with any chick probably means she’s fucked a bi somewhere down the line because those greedy fucks want the best of both worlds and the whole Gay is trendy movement, but that doesn’t change the fact that Ashlee Simpson is officially on my blacklist and you should watch out for her, Baptists with Bi boyfriends are at high risk.

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Fergie’s Panty Leak of the Day

4 Comments »

Fergie isn’t a man because she has boobs and wears women’s panties. That’s usually the defining criteria I need before fooling around with what I think is a chick. Until I see her scrotum, I am sticking to the theory that she was born a chick, she’s just a little more muscular than most dudes I know, but I guess the dudes I know are lazy drunks who think standing in the shower is too much work, so they just avoid them all together. These are supposed to be panty pictures that leaked from her new music video. I am not sure if they really are, but they passed get posted anyway, I am not sure if that makes you lucky or not, but if you are reading this site, I’ll go with not….

Posted in:Fergie|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Fergie's Panty Leak of the Day

No Comments »

Fergie isn’t a man because she has boobs and wears women’s panties. That’s usually the defining criteria I need before fooling around with what I think is a chick. Until I see her scrotum, I am sticking to the theory that she was born a chick, she’s just a little more muscular than most dudes I know, but I guess the dudes I know are lazy drunks who think standing in the shower is too much work, so they just avoid them all together. These are supposed to be panty pictures that leaked from her new music video. I am not sure if they really are, but they passed get posted anyway, I am not sure if that makes you lucky or not, but if you are reading this site, I’ll go with not….

Posted in:Fergie|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Liz Hurley Hurts Kids of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t know what the laws are about posting pictures of celebrity kids, but I can only assume that I am not allowed to and if these pics hadn’t made me laugh then I wouldn’t have bothered because a kid can’t be responsible for his mother being a hollywood slut we all used to want to fuck and would still fuck if we were given the chance but the fact that we aren’t billionaires from India make it pretty much impossible to make happen because she likes to fuck wallets more than fucking guys who are good a videogames. Sucks for you.

I am posting these pictures because the kid is making funny fucking faces like it has to pee or something, I don’t really understand little kid language because I am one of those old bitter fucks who find kids scary. Either way, his mom is just ignoring the motherfucker, because it is the nanny’s job and her phone call is more important than the pain in the ass that came from her womb.

Posted in:Liz Hurley|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Genius Radio Contest of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t know if this has really made the Internet rounds yet, because it was emailed into me, and I never do background checks, but it made me laugh because it’s some kind of twisted shit that I wish I had come up with or wish I had executed for the website instead of some shitty radio show.

I have never made a mother and daughter make out. I have never fantasized about a mother and daughter hooking up in front of me, but I did used to think about one of my girlfriend’s daughter who was in college and would wear her panties around the house like I was in that movie Lolita. I did know a guy who used to to slam his girlfriend’s daughter when he would show up for dinner a couple hours early, but that shit is standard and probably happens all the time, but making out for shitty tickets to a shitty white trash comedy show is pretty much next level and only happens in places where shitty white trash comedy show tickets are considered a prize, a white trash place we should all move to, if ugly fat sluts who like donuts is your thing.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Dita Von Tease Performing of the Day

61 Comments »

I did a post on Dita Von Tease performing at some point last week that you can find HERE . I don’t really have much to say about this, other than the fact that her shit is dull, burlesque is dull, and her lame nipple tassels are dull. I just thought that it was funny that she did a performance a couple of days ago that was pretty much exactly the same as the one from 2 weeks ago and the pictures are pretty much the exact same as they were 2 weeks ago, which makes this post as dull as Dita Von Tease.

It makes me realize that if I could come up with one post that I could re-use with every set of pictures I post, I’d have a much easier life, especially since you don’t actually read this and come for the pictures.

Bonus: Dita Von Tease Nude Photoshoot
GO

Posted in:Dita Von Tease|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Paris Hilton’s Fake Tits of the Day

60 Comments »

The funny news of the day is that Perez Hilton was paid by Paris Hilton’s people to not talk shit about her. I think that’s called selling out, but that’s not really surprising considering this fucker was hated so much growing up that he was a gun short of a school shooting. instead he took the high road and through years of self-hatred ended up with a shitty site that everyone started reading, god fucking knows why, because it was pretty clear to me that motherfucker was too ugly to listen to, but on his quest for acceptance he took the first offer than came his way from a real life celebrity and that was to pay him to keep his mouth shut. He’s a fucking pussy, even though he doesn’t have one, he’s just rocking a man cunt that I am sure a whole lot of young big dicked fags have cum inside many times, while doing meth they bought with Hilton’s money.

Point of the story is that I’d probably take Paris’ money too, but only because I am poor but I’d still say she was a worthless washed up cunt subliminally. Censoring yourself for dollars is pretty fucking weak and since I hae no respect for motherfucker, I guess I couldn’t lose respect for him, but I did get to remind myself why I have no respect for him.

Either way here are some pictures of Paris Hilton that made their rounds yesterday, I guess it’s the only way her herpes ridden ass can stay in the public eye, because it seems like mainstream guys like big tits enough to ignore a busted, broken down haggared face with nothing to offer, but a weight gain, a muff gut and face that’s going to look like a fucking catcher’s mitt in a couple of years, cuz cocaine’s no substitute for Oil of Olay, not to mention her push up bra with rubber inserts to make her look like she isn’t as flat chested as her fat ass is.

I am nice, now go fuck yourself, if you’re a chick, do it on camera, I am a dirtbag and have no standards.

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Unsorted

2007

18

Apr

I am – Paris Hilton's Fake Tits of the Day

No Comments »

The funny news of the day is that Perez Hilton was paid by Paris Hilton’s people to not talk shit about her. I think that’s called selling out, but that’s not really surprising considering this fucker was hated so much growing up that he was a gun short of a school shooting. instead he took the high road and through years of self-hatred ended up with a shitty site that everyone started reading, god fucking knows why, because it was pretty clear to me that motherfucker was too ugly to listen to, but on his quest for acceptance he took the first offer than came his way from a real life celebrity and that was to pay him to keep his mouth shut. He’s a fucking pussy, even though he doesn’t have one, he’s just rocking a man cunt that I am sure a whole lot of young big dicked fags have cum inside many times, while doing meth they bought with Hilton’s money.

Point of the story is that I’d probably take Paris’ money too, but only because I am poor but I’d still say she was a worthless washed up cunt subliminally. Censoring yourself for dollars is pretty fucking weak and since I hae no respect for motherfucker, I guess I couldn’t lose respect for him, but I did get to remind myself why I have no respect for him.

Either way here are some pictures of Paris Hilton that made their rounds yesterday, I guess it’s the only way her herpes ridden ass can stay in the public eye, because it seems like mainstream guys like big tits enough to ignore a busted, broken down haggared face with nothing to offer, but a weight gain, a muff gut and face that’s going to look like a fucking catcher’s mitt in a couple of years, cuz cocaine’s no substitute for Oil of Olay, not to mention her push up bra with rubber inserts to make her look like she isn’t as flat chested as her fat ass is.

I am nice, now go fuck yourself, if you’re a chick, do it on camera, I am a dirtbag and have no standards.

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Unsorted

2007

17

Apr

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t really see anything as being very funny or entertaining today and I can’t even make awkward jokes about the whole thing because they aren’t even coming to me. The whole shooting is too fucked up, but a friend of mine said that this Korean had no Seoul and I thought that was a pretty appropriate ironic t-shirt for the events that happened, but it didn’t really make me laugh. I am not trying to be a downer because I know that is the last thing people need, so here are some links for you to distract yourself with!

Kellie Picker Vs Carrie Underwood
GO

Paris Hilton is Scared of Jail
GO

Raging Hipsters Trash an Abandoned Building in NYC This Weekend Video
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Centrum Silver Makes You Feel Young – Funny Ad
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Fast Forward Blowjobs – NSFW but FUnny
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Man Gets His Dick Stuck To His Car Video
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Here’s a Little Air Sex, You Don’t Need to Take Your Clothes Off Yet
GO

Big Berlin Tits Video
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Naked Chick Shows Off Her Tampon
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The Twisted Stories of the Virginia Tech Shooter.
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Billie Piper Nip Slip
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Kelly Brook in The Book of Kelly
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Elisabetta Gregoraci Topless
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Joe Pesci is Fucking Insane
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Heather Mills Dancing With the Stars Wipeout
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Matthew McConaughey Trailer Park Living
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Some Idiot Playin’ Chicken with a Train
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Jessica Simpson’s Big Old Titties
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Danielle Lloyd Wants New Breasts
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Chicks With Black Eyes Compilation
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Sienna Miller Turns Me On Because She Doesn’t Wash
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Ron Jeremy: If the Hybrid is Rocking:
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Small Tit Flash
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Cock Rock is Better When It’s Hard – Homo
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Drunk Girls Shower Together and That’s My Fetish
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Weirdest Party in the World
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Brazilian Beach Ass from April 2007
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Ass Face – Something Stinks on Capitol Hill
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Here’s Carson Daly Taking a Shower
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Big Brother Argentina Chick Naked, her Name is Griselda Sanchez
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Forest Whitaker Gets his Star of Fame and This Excites You Cuz You are a Loser
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Beckham’s Cock
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Nude Photos from NYC
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This Site Has Weird Porn Moments in Porn
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Fat Kelly Clarkson Video Shoot
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Kirsten Dunst at the World Premiere of Spider Man 3
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Paris Hilton is a Fucking Busted, Washed Up Cunt and Here are Her New Big Tits
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Shakira Posing Doggystyle
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Kelly Ripa Leaves Late Night with David Letterman Looking Hot
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Songs of Praise, What People Are Really Singing in Church
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Keeley Hazell Does Benny Benassi
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Jaime Hammar Has Some Big Ol’ Titties
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The Sexiest Assassins
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Husband Tells Wife Why He Cheats on Her on National Radio
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What’s Ashy Smoking?
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You don’t get laid, I don’t make money, this will help us both
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted