People are so unappreciative…. You offer them a vibrator you found in a box in the corner of the basement of your apartment – where the trash used to go – and they get all offended – even though the thing still works… Like soak that shit in bleach girl and be a little socially […]
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2018
31
Jan
Pam and Tommy 20 Year Sex Tape Anniversary of the Day
The Pammy and Tommy sex tape from 1998 was a huge fucking deal, in an early internet era, when celebrities, even Playboy models turned huge titty stars, were not putting out homemade porno…it was cutting edge, it paged the way for all things good in the world like PARIS HILTON and KIM KARDASHIAN…but more importantly, […]
2018
31
Jan
Morning Hangover Dump of the Day
Last night, I learned that Coal is Clean Energy…not that I watch Presidential Speeches for countries I don’t live in…but sometimes accidents happen…and who knows, maybe Coal is clean and I’m just a racist against that black gold and the black lung it caused miners and the cloud of green air around china… I also […]
2018
08
Jan
stepLINKS of the Day
I saw someone complaining that a man should not have hosted the Golden Globes last night, which is a nice a reminder that women are totally reasonable in this social justice we’re all victims movement, where there’s no room for men anywhere because they are all rapist perverts, and because they all feel victimized or […]
2018
04
Jan
Lady Gaga Got that Thong On of the Day
I wonder who told Lady Gaga that because she’s able to sing, and manipulate the human race with her song, like some kind of computer program that knows exactly what rhythms or sequences of sounds the brain responds to, because I have never actively listened to a lady gaga song but could probably sing ever […]
2018
02
Jan
stepLINKS of the Day
I used to get excited when people would block me on social media, like I was doing something right…I remember I live tweeted the Michael Jackson funeral and lost what I think was 5000 followers on twitter, in what I felt was a success, without realizing then, or even now, you only matter if you […]
2017
28
Dec
stepLINKS of the Day
I know how irritating it is to talk to people about the weather, it’s the small talk that translates to go fuck yourself, I don’t care about you, I don’t care about what you think, or what you have to say, it’s just a polite way to say “you’re nothing to me, but we’re forced […]
2017
27
Dec
Morning HAngover Dump of the Day
The older I get, the less perverted I get…I used to just think of the most rank, offensive, terrifying, disturbing things…I would think and talk dirty to everyone…making them all feel uncomfortable in what I would deny I ever did because the key to all sex assault charges is to DENY TIL YOU DIE…you know […]
2017
09
Dec
stepLINKS of the Day
I try to get girls to send me nudes pretty much all the time. Sometimes I pose as a potential agent or producer who can give them that jumpstart to their careers, other times, I play the victim loser I am who just needs to get laid but can’t get laid so I take the […]
2017
08
Dec
Morning Hangover Dump of the Day
Don’t bother following your dreams…it’s a waste of time. Send Nudes… Here are some stepLINKS in the Morning… Check Out My Holiday Gift Guide DON’T CLICK HERE Useless Celebs at ARt Basel DON’T CLICK HERE Taylor Swift in Leather Poem of the Day DON’T CLICK HERE Hiding the Side Chick in the Dryer DON’T CLICK […]