Katy Perry claims she has DD tits and I’ve had DD tits in my mouth a few times and I think it’s safe to say that these aren’t DDs, not that a girl’s tit size really matters, because every DD I’ve had have been offensively big and pretty much hung like you’d expect them to and had an ass to match, so instead of getting excited enough to play with them, I kinda just went through the motions and would fake orgasms to end the aubse to myself. Now, maybe Katy Perry’s was a fat chick with DDs, because she looks like she’s got that kind of potential, but the touring, partying and pressure of the media’s keeping her in check, but when the 5 minutes are over, I figure she’ll slow down and go back to the couch to eat bag after bag of chips where she belongs because she’s not hot and her songs are irritating…..

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Katy Perry is a pig. I don’t care if she’s got tits and that’s her only claim to sex appeal or if she talks about kissing other girls because she knows it is marketable, I have heard her in interviews and she sounds like the type of messy girl who breaks a stool, tries to make out with the bar tender, but ends up making out with some fat dude in the corner, before puking all over the place and running out embarrased. You know the sloppy girl who you see crying at a pizza place after a night of drinking, with a ripped dress, stuffing her face knowing that she sucks at fucking life and that is because she does suck at life and no matter how much she tells me she’s got hot tits, or how often her song bounces around inside my head like a viral infection, we both know that she is the ugly friend nobody wants and no matter how drunk I am, I stay as far the fuck away as I can because despite being easy, she comes with a very persistant attitude and would show up on your doorstep at 4 am begging to suck your dick, which isn’t a bad thing, but can be a pretty fucking annoying thing, because she always seems to smell like french fries and she never really goes away, but she does flip the used condom inside out, hoping to keep you around for the next 18 years, because she’s just that desperate.

Bonus – More Pics of Her Being Ugly….

Posted in:Katy Perry|Tits

I hate being fat. This morning i was walking around and saw a plastic bag filled with sloppy fucking pizza. I assume it was someone’s lunch that they accidentally dropped, or it was some kind of predator hunting for fat people, but shit almost worked on me. I saw it, and despite not knowing who it belonged to, where it came from, how long it had been there, and whether it was poisoned, my initial instinct was to bring in home, brush it off and give it to my wife to test before eating it myself. The I realized that my paranoia would have me in the corner hugging my knees thinking I was drugged and dying or self-induced hallucinating, that would probably lead to me running down the street naked, then getting arrested and institutionalized after they realize that it was all in my head and not actually the affect of a drug and picking up food in plastic bags, no matter how good it looks, is disgusting, and it’d be better to just order a pizza with my wife’s credit card, but I decided to bring it up for my wife, put it on a plate and stick it in the fridge so that when she gets home it’ll be the first thing she eats, without asking, because she’s a sneaky fat girl like that, who thinks if she hides the cookies and eats them without anyone knowing, it’s like she didn’t actually eat them at all, one of those tree falling in the forest situations, only she still gets fat regardless….and I will be very happy when she asks where the pizza came from, after eating half of it, to tell her I found it on the street corner next to a pile of dog shit….she’ll freak.

Speaking of fat, here’s some pictures of Katy Perry showing off her tits, because like all fat chicks, she like to show them off and draw attention to herself, so guys notice them and makes her feel like they are noticing her making her think they she has some value, instead of the looks of disgust she used to get growing up every time she was seen eating in public, before she undeservingly got famous….

Bonus – Here’s a Picture of her a some Perez Hilton lookin’ motherfucker in his underwear because a Katy Perry show is the equivalent of seeing Perez Hilton in his underwear…

On a side note, Katy Perry is fake friends with Perez because she like the media attention and being written about by him, like a slut dating a man with a fat wallet, Katy Perry is an opportunist, which is pretty obvious if you look at where she’s got based on what she’s produced, it just doesn’t make sense…without sucking the right dick, or being a lonely man with a powerful website’s friend…here’s the video.

Either way, I hate this cunt. I hate that she is famous and I hate the song she sings that haunts my dreams….

Here’s her Hot n Cold Video being annoying…

Here’s some 16 year old girl making her own Hot n Cold Video because I make people famous sometimes….

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If you read this site, which you don’t, but I pretend you do, I mean that’s why I write these stupid things, it’s not for me to keep track of my bullshit that goes on in my mind, that is pretty fucking repetitive and uninteresting, it’s to entertain , even if there’s no fucking audience. A juggling man on the sidewalk that no one notices, is still a fucking juggler, right?

I don’t know where I was going with that, but I do know that I hate Katy Perry, her song, and if you read the site, you know I constantly write about it. I think she fucked the media by taking a cliche fantasy guys and girls have and singing about it in a bubble gum kinda way, making the shit way more pedophiliac, until seeing the girl who sings the shit, and realizing she’s some chubby, unattractive chick, making the whole young girls experimenting turn into two lonely girls who can’t land a date because no guys want them, turning to each other while watching old Ellen reruns or some independent film, and tonguing each other to really feel what love and using each other to show them….

Anyway, she has big tits, at least she always talks about the, donates them to charity and claims they are bigger than they are, like they are some kind of achievement, or trophy, despite the only achievement being on the pill and being able to emotionally eat 8 Big Macs in one fucking sitting…Don’t let her recent weight loss trick you, that’s smoke and mirrors, cocaine and performing, this dumpy bitch only focuses on her tits, because they were the only thing that got her male attention growing up, and she’s still living that fat girl life….because she will always be a fat girl and her tits will always be her only talent…..that’s why her dress has eyes, because they are the only place people look when they talk to her and she felt it would be smart to accommodate because it was starting to make her remember that her tits are all she’s worth….right.

Posted in:Katy Perry|Tits