Legs Archives - Page 10 of 22 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2009

22

Jul

Lindsay Lohan’s Happy Legs of the Day

So I emailed Samantha Ronson asking for her BBM because I was given a Blackberry last week, she told me she didn’t use BBM, so I’m on facebook and her status is asking whether she should download the new BBM 5.1, so not only does bitch use BBM, she also knows the fuckin’ version of software she uses, and when I called her out on it. she just ignored me…..Lesbians….They are such penis haters….If I had a pussy, she’d be all up on this like she was all up on Lohan back before she was famous.

Here is Lohan and her legs lookin’ happy to be alive, look at the smile on her face, the same face that lets vagina get smeared all over it, and for some reason I find that such a hard thing to visualize, despite Lohan’s sexually history, I just can’t see her fuckin guys or girls, she’s more of the passed out in the corner puking kind of girl….

I wonder why she is so happy, I guess she got her STD tests back and she passed, because it is hard for lesbians to transmit the HIV virus to each other unless they have cuts in their mouths.

Or Maybe it’s just a beautiful day in Hollywood….

Overall, I really don’t give a fuck…..

Posted in:Happy|Legs|Lindsay Lohan

2009

17

Jul

Cheryl Tweedy Cole Getting Out of Cars for the Takeover of the Day

2 Comments »

Cheryl Tweedy Cole is on some solo missions. She figures she’s got enough talent to drop those leeching cunts she’s been forced to rise to the top of shitty pop music in the UK with and take on the USA on her own. So she’s covered up her prison tattoos and put on some wholesome 1950s housewife dress that she manages to use to cover her dirty whore pussy when getting out of a car and I’m hoping this is just a tease to get us watching her and noticing her before she pulls some kind of massive vagina stunt before the album drops, like popstar whores are supposed to do to sell records and have staying power in America….I guess only time will tell…..but if you happen to be working with her on this new career move, you may want to tip her off and let her know we’re expecting labia, cuz none of us give a shit about her music….

Here she is wearing a different colorful dress from the other day…I know…Exciting isn’t it…

Posted in:Cheryl Tweedy Cole|Legs|Solo Career

2009

17

Jul

Marisa Miller’s Not As Hot as Her Body of the Day

9 Comments »

Marisa Miller is a bikini model because of her body so that’s what we should be focusing on because whatever the fuck is going on with her hard, leathery, old lookin’ face, reminds me of some ex-prostitutes I was in NA with a couple of years ago. It’s like this bitch started out with a set of fake tits, two 10 pound dumbells, a tanning machine and a fuckin’ dream and she made it, but time isn’t on her face’s side, shit is melting into some kind of weird, but I’m definitely on her body’s side, shit is done proper, so she needs to embrace her place in the world and get in a little less dress and a little more bikini, but at least we get a taste with them legs…

Posted in:Legs|Marisa Miller|Model

2009

10

Jul

Lindsay Lohan’s Legs Keepin Busy of the Day

6 Comments »

I like tracking Lohan’s whereabouts because I feel a connection with her, you know we both like pussy, we both have rancid genitals and neither of us have work or anything to do with our time, or anything going for us, I am a waste of space with no talent, while she’s just had her time to shine and the only real difference between us is I am broke and too lazy to wander the streets, so I turn to the internet to post random shit no one reads, while she goes out and spends all her child star money on useless shit.

Posted in:Legs|Lindsay Lohan|Shopping

2009

09

Jul

Emilie De Ravin Shows Off Her Legs of the Day

2 Comments »

I don’t know who this is and I don’t know why I am posting it, but from my extensive research that I did on her, I discovered she is recently single as her 3 year marriage just ended and she is not wearing her wedding ring in this picture. I also discovered that she is from Australia and I think I have a soft spot for Australian chicks. Ever since I was younger I’ve crossed paths with a few, since they are nomadic and travel the world, and they have all consistently been way cooler than me, which isn’t saying much, but they are always down to party, always easy going and down to fuck, and just last week I was at some after party with an Australian chick I met at 4 in the morning and drank with her until 7 in the morning because she kept feeding me shots until I couldn’t walk, but for some reason she could, like some kind of machine sent from heaven. Unfortunately, I didn’t fuck her, mainly because despite being cool and down to fuck, she wasn’t blind, retarded or desperate, but I part of me wishes that she was…..and that part of me is my penis.

Posted in:Emilie De Ravin|Legs

2009

09

Jul

Lindsay Lohan Getting Out of Cars of the Day

4 Comments »

I don’t give a fuck about Lindsay Lohan anymore. It was fun while it lasted but I think she’s pretty much dead now or at least a few hauls of her cigarette away from being dead…she doesn’t do anything stimulating anymore, you know like fuck dudes, or show off her suffocating pussy as she gets out of car, you’d expect the thing to have a mind of its own after all the dickhead it’s eaten, and make a fuckin’ move or plan a fuckin’ escape from her host body, but instead shit stayed boring, something I am accustomed to.

On a sidenote, I am just bitter she stopped following me on twitter, her follow really validated my life, like a cosign from a fellow addict,

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Legs|Lindsay Lohan

2009

08

Jul

Some Lindsay Lohan Legs in Shorts of the Day

2 Comments »

Lindsay Lohan has a skinny useless ass and I am not just saying that because she doesn’t work, or because she blocked me on Twitter, or because I like booty, but I am saying it because her ass has essentially been sewn the fuck up as it has rejected penis and turned to bumpin up with vagina, leaving it with no real purpose for me or any other guy, other than being a place her anorexic, drug addicted ass secretes whatever the fuck kind of feces anorexia and addiction produce….shit that I assume wouldn’t make the cut and get cast in a scat porn, not because it came out of Lohan and her and everything about her can’t get work, but because it would lack the talent needed to be smeared on a whores face while getting fuck. If that makes sense. Which it probably doesn’t.

BONUS – Here’s Her Skinny Person Belly While Hiding Her Face….

Posted in:Legs|Lindsay Lohan

2009

06

Jul

Charlize Theron and her Legs of the Day

1 Comment »

Everyone loves Charlize Theron, mainly because she’s hot, but I like to think it’s because she’s a white chick from Africa, you know something seemingly rare to an ignorant fuck like me who thinks all of Africa is a series of huts and villages filled with black people and AIDS babies, making Charlize seemingly exciting to fuck because the possibility of her African HIV pussy, without actually getting HIV because white people don’t get AIDS, at least that’s what I tell myself everytime the condom breaks when I used to fuck dirty French Canadian street whores.

Posted in:Charlize Theron|Legs

2009

30

Jun

Rihanna is a Robot of the Day

2 Comments »

If reading this site is as boring as writing it, I feel bad for you for constanly coming back, hoping that maybe things will change, that I’ll get inspired and that I won’t be repetitive, even though pictures of celebrities get fucking borin, you know same people, doing the same thing, wearing different clothes, on fuckin’ repeat, like groundhog day without the funny or “Instant Classic” appeal or the groundhog, making me sit down and reflect on the fact that I should be wherever Rihanna is sticking my fingers inside her, and not sitting here writing about her lookin’ like a robot I wanna fuck, because robots don’t get fat, talk back or ruin my fuckin’ life on all fuckin’ fronts, whether it’s lecturing me about drinking too much, or lecturing me about fuckin’ other chicks, or lecturing me to get a fuckin’ job, unless the robots go crazy on some world takeover, like we livin’ in a Will Smith movie, but that shit’s too Sci-Fi for me to think about, I’ll leave that to you, because Sci-Fi is all you know…

Posted in:Legs|Rihanna|Robot

2009

23

Jun

Kristen Bell and her Cellulite Ridden Legs

4 Comments »

The media puts so much focus on being perfect, not having cellulite, being fit and it makes girls crazy, insecure and a lot easier to fuck, so it can’t be a bad thing.

The only thing bad about it is when you date/become friends (try to fuck) one of these girls and she becomes comforable enough to only talk about that, because it’s really all that’s on her fuckin’ mind until it drives you fuckin insane, because hearing her ask if she’s fat, or talk about how she threw up dinner and did speed to stay awake, is desperate and annoying to put up with, especially when all you’re lookin’ for is pussypretty much every chick has cellulite.

Just yesterday, a 15 year old 5 foot 11 model lookin’ chick walked by me and I noticed her legs had dimples on the shit, and I guess that goes to show us that it’s just something that women get, whether skinny or not, it’s normal to fuckin’ have, and to hate it, makes us faggot.

That said, Kristen Bell is a sloppy fuckin’ bitch and if her legs are this wrecked, I’d hate to see the condition of her pussy.

Now, we can all understand why she’s dating a cunt like Dax, and that’s because she’s a second rate, low grade, garbage quality pig.