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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

14

Nov

I am – Tara Reid Showing Up Late for Work of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

Here are some pictures of Tara Reid showing up an hour late for work in Vancouver probably from a late night drinking. I am running late today too and it’s probably for the same reason. Based on what she’s wearing, you’d think she was showing up for the afternoon shift at the strip club and not showing up to some movie set.

I used to park outside the strip club back when I had a driver’s license and my neighbor’s car keys, before getting charged with a DUI and losing that shit and leaving my neighbor’s shit box on the side of the highway, and all the daytime strippers would show up like this. They’d be wearing their club slut coat, with track pants and a haggard face from an abusive night before, only to get inside and take the shit off for a dude who pays them 10 dollars a song, which rarely happened because it was the afternoon shift. I guess there are a lot of similarities between Tara Reid’s career and an afternoon stripper, because makin’ money rarely happens which is too bad because she still owes money on her implants she bought on credit.

Either way, I am not a fashionable person. I don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong and I generally don’t give a fuck about what a girl is wearing, I am more into what a girl isn’t wearing and how I am going to get them to take off whatever they are wearing to do a little dance for me. But that’s just because I love dancing.


Related Posts:

Tara Reid Hot in FHM Magazine
Tara Reid’s See Through Shirt
Tara Reid’s Bikini Pictures
Tara Reid’s Old Man Ass

Posted in:Haggard|Late|Tara Reid|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I’ve been sitting in a Starbucks for the last 6 hours because my wife is having one of those days where she smells really bad and I can’t deal with it despite that fact that I married it.

I was hoping I’d see something interesting happen but then I realized that interesting people don’t do coffee shops. All I got was some girl who’s age I was betting on with some pervert who was lookin’ at her tits with me, I was aiming for 18 because it makes me feel less dirty but he was convinced she was 14 and was so into it.

Then I had to deal with pregnant couples make lame pregnant couple jokes, that made me realize exactly what their lives at home are like and their happiness was fucking offensive, I thought pregnant bitches were supposed to be hormonal and have some edge, not giving high fives to their baby daddy’s like they are the biggest fucking cunts on the planet.

Then some old creepy dude seemed to be chatting up this young dude by asking him what music he likes and asking him what websites he downloads shit from, then dude went into chatting about how he’s missing Law and Order SVU, because that’s his favorite but he also likes criminal minds and CSI, then he invited the young dude over for a jam session…which I can only assume in his mind meant cummin on dude’s ass before pullin’ the tricks he’s learnt on all his crime shows….I thought about calling the cops, but figured I’d write about instead, I don’t like cops that much and I also don’t like the staff of Starbucks, I saw them hand out at least 50 free drinks to their homies who rolled through, while I sat there like an asshole nursing my coffee for 6 hours, like I was an 18 year old punk in a strip club nursing my 10 dollar beer because I only had enough money for one beer and wanted to take in as much pussy as I could but was scared they’d kick me out if I was sitting there running on empty…

Fuck starbucks, here are my links….

Claudia Schiffer in a See Through Dress at the Beach
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A Bunch of Stupid Brown People Try To Flip Over a Car
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Some Sex Ringtone Prank That You’ve Probably Already Seen But is New To Me
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Some Indian Man Marries His Dog….
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Christina Aguilera’s Baby Shower Video….
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Some Russian Snowboarding Behind a Train Because Russians Are Insane
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Owen Wilson’s Dating Some Model Named Le Call(girl) here are her Lingerie Pictures
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Miss Nude World Girls Kissing Topless on Howard Stern
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A WHole Lot of Sluts at A Car Show
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Paris Hilton is Either Pregnant or Bloated but I think Neither Are Possible Since Her Lady Parts Fell Out a Couple Years Ago, So Maybe She’s Just Fat
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Sex in the Internet Cafe
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Chelsy Davy is Prince Harry’s Girlfriend Who Dumped Him For Texting Other Chicks…These Are Pictures of Her Emotionally Wrecked Over the Whole Thing…Dude’s a Prince and Could Easily Get Better Pussy….Or at Least Pussy That Doesn’t Dump Him For Talking To Other Pussy….and Joins In the Fun….
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More Pictures of the Sharon Stone Camel Toe
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Kelly Clarkson’s Been Emotionally Eating Her Body into a Fat Chick
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Meet the Gentle Giant – Who’s Pretty Fuckin Weird Lookin and Will Give You Nightmares
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Christina Aguilera All Bundled Up While Pregnant…I Guess The Air Conditioning in LA is Strong
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The Coolest Crazy Homeless Person I’ve Seen Today
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The Duffgusting Sisters Hang With Fat Dudes in a Purse to Make Them Look Skinnier
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Some Wardrobe Malfunction Business on Some Gameshow
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A Little More Haylie Duff Because Bitch is Fucking Weird Looking…
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Shakira is an Wild and Adventurous Columbian Because She Wears Animal Prints
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Boy George is Charged With Kidnapping Some Homo and Chaining Him To The Wall
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Sluts Getting Down and Dirty with Each Making Their Parents Proud
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Some Angie Harmon (who?) on the Cover of Shape Magazine with a Hot Photoshopped Body
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French Chicks Like Wine…A lot…
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Jailbait for You To Get Arrested Over of the Day
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Brooke Hogan Working Out Pictures
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Kristy Roche is Some Girl Who Is Posing Half Naked in Ralph Magazine
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The Karashians Are Signed for Season 2 – Exclusive – Thanks Ryan Seacrest
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Some Site is Name Dropping Me When Talking About Tits…Because I Am an Expert on Tits, I guess You Need a Set to Really Understand Them, Thanks Beer.
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These People are Turning into Trees and It’s Fucking Disgusting
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Sarah Silverman’s Aids Song is Offensive Because I Hate Her
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The Top 20 Side Boobs of All Time
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Battle Of The Bust
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Lohan’s Newest Addiction…Buying Expensive Purses…Look at Her Face…Looks Like She’s Scoring Crack
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Vivica Fox Showing Off Her Body in Some Half Naked Photoshoot
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Some Celebrity I’ve Never Heard of Steals Other People’s Tip Money…Because That’s the Way I Tip a Bartender….too
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Jonah Ray’s Freeloaders Guide To Internet Dating
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Reese Witherspoon is on the Cover of Southern Beauty Magazine
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Jordan / Katie Price Dresses Like a Nun For Her Husband in Bed Cuz She’s So Naughty
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Some Chinese Dude Cookin’ Rats for Dinner Because That’s What Hungry People Do
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Some Chick Named Gabriela’s Got some Big Fuckin’ Tits
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The Hottest Ass of the Year
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Dude With 8 Cocks Keeps Some Slag Busy….
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Kathy Griffen’s Husband is a Lookin’ Good Sweetheart…But Then Again So Is She…It’s So Nice When Ugly People Find Love…
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Some Webcam Chick Stripping
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Vintage Lesbian Video
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Mike Tyson’s Greatest moments:
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Anna Beatriz Barros Lookin’ Insanely Hot in These Posed Pics
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From Photobucket:

Some Dude Posts a Couple Pics of Some GIrls Taking Nude Pics Together on their Camera Phone For Him
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Some Girl Shows Off Her Nakedness
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From the Forum:

Some UT Drama Major – Acting Naked
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Some Chick Named Susanna is a Cocktease
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Some New Suicide GIrl Download
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Celeste Fox is a Porn Site that Does Good
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Ashlee Simpson’s Lookin’ Alright of the Day

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I have decided to make my site for hot chicks and only hot chicks so if you aren’t a hot chick, leave and never come back, this place isn’t for you. If you are a hot chick, then hey baby, what’s up? Do you come here often? You know I write this site don’t you? Does that make you want to shower for me? Let’s get busy.

That’s enough dreamin’, I know you are a dude and I am over it, but I am not over this Simpson sister because Ashlee’s lookin’ better than usual, I guess dating fags does good things for a girl. He probably does her hair and make-up and dresses her to look stylish, before crying himself to sleep and writing about it for his next Fall Out Boy song about how misunderstood he is. Or maybe the Botox she’s getting at 23 to make her eyes look bigger is pullin’ through. By the time bitch hits 30 she may end up doing Kanye West’s mother’s dance, I hear it’s like Souja Boy, but more dead.

Yeah, I know Soulja Boy is dying fast, but it’s still alive enough for my joke to make sense, even if my joke wasn’t funny.


Related Posts:

Ashlee Simpson Dates Bi-Sexuals
Some Ashlee Simpson Bikini
More Ashlee Simpson’s Bikini
Ashlee Simspon’s Nipple

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|cleavage|Hot|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Lohan is Hanging With Her Lesbian Cock Ronson of the Day

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So it seems like Lohan’s fallen off the wagon or is at least about to fall off the wagon and that gets me excited because she’s going to be more accessible. I don’t actually think she’s ever been on a wagon, but that’s only because her parents turned her into a money making machine when she was a kid and when you’re a money making machine, there’s not time to play and also because I am sure the rehab center she was at were letting her do whatever fucking drugs she wanted because she was a great marketing tool for them.

That said, she’s back with the Lesbian Cock Ronson and where there’s lesbian cock there’s cocaine, especially when that lesbian cock is a bad DJ, because she needs that shit to get the confidence to go on stage and make a fool of herself without realizing it. Powdered Courage baby…you should try it.

Bonus: Steve Aoki – Lohan’s Homey is in some videogame and it made me laugh


Related Posts:

Lohan Lookin’ Wrecked
Lohan is Partying Drunk
Lohan Lookin’ Wrecked
Lohan Doing Cocaine Screen Shots
Lohan is a Drunken Party Slut

Posted in:Lesbian Cock|Lindsay Lohan|Samantha Ronson|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Sarah Harding Nipple Slip from Yesterday of the Day

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So being the shitty blogger that I am, I posted all these pictures of a useless slut named Sarah Harding from some useless UK Spice Girls rip off called Girls Aloud yesterday and I didn’t post the nipple slip. Consider this a maintenance post for a guy who isn’t too good at fixing things I’ve fucked up because I’d be spending my entire day backtracking because I suck at life, but at least I am making the effort right now by bringing it to you now, because you like nipples in pictures since you can’t get nipples in life. Cuddles.

Posted in:Nipple|Sarah Harding|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Maxim Hometown Hotties Winner Erin of the Day

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So Maxim picked their hometown hotties winner and it’s some bitch named Erin. I am not sure if you bother caring, but I reviewed all the hometown hotties contestents and this is what I had to say about Erin….

Point of this is that she’s worth a round, but that’s not saying much to you, because the last time you ate a hamburger you got a boner just thinking about sliding your dick it it’s warm juicy goodness, you being blinded by your dick and sexual depravity makes you ignore that her tits are all wonky and she’s boxier than the trailer her Daytona Ass is from.

I guess that’s why Maxim hasn’t offered me a high paying job in New York that I would use to bag all the models and any decent lookin’ girl I run into promising them the chance at the cover, while knowing I’d never have that pull, but they wouldn’t need to know that until after they shower for me, because showering for me would obviously be the auditioning process.

Check out all of Erin’s Slutty Winning Pictures
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Read my hometown hotties reviews
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Posted in:Erin McKinnon|Hometown Hotties|Maxim|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Nicole Scherzinger’s Trying Too Hard of the Day

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I just got this email:

hello, i love reading your site.. laugh my ass off

im thinking of starting one myself. do you have any advice? where do you find photos?

thanks
youre super funny

Sure dude, why don’t I just start your site for you and have you not pay me a fucking cent, because I’m an asshole and can only hope that my hard work makes your site bigger and better than mine, because let’s face it, I have a pretty shitty fucking website, but at least you think it’s funny, even though it’s not meant to be.

I don’t understand why anyone would want to start a website, people who own websites are losers. The internet was made by losers for losers, like FUBU but different. There was a time when I’d go online just to mess around with socially awkward fuck ups lookin’ for like minded socially awkward fucked up people from other towns, because I guess there’s only so many losers in one zip code. It was a time when online dating was for obese people and virgins and not for the college frat boy to land hot pussy on myspace or facebook, or even for you to go home after getting wasted and being able to stalk the girl you just made out with. It was a better time with more person to person contact, and less talking to screens.

I remember when I first started doing this garbage 3 years ago, no one was really doing it. Perez didn’t exist, TMZ didn’t exist, the ones that did exist were just virgins and fags posting pictures and obsessing over how much they loved celebrities. No one was ripping into them or laughing at them and now new fucking websites pop up everyday and are all a lot more successful that I’ll ever be….within their first week.

Reality is that Internet is still for fucking losers, because hot and cool people are out living life and are too busy being hot and cool to care about sitting in front of a fucking computer all day, unless they are at work, but hot and cool people don’t work and hot and cool people who do work are usually running shit and are too busy loving themselves and their businesses to waste time on the net. So reality is if you are hot and on the net from work, your job is obviously insignificant making you a loser, but send me nudes, I’ll make you feel better about yourself, even though we all know what you are, if you’re reading this. So we don’t need to give the internet back to the losers, the definition of loser has just broadened its scope.

Speaking of try hard losers, here are some pictures of Nicole Scherzinger’s busted face giving the peace sign that is so fucking played out by now that every time I see it, I get flashbacks of high school girls at starbucks posing for their myspace profiles, and let’s face it, Nicole Scherzinger hasn’t been in high school for at least 2 decades and is trying a little too hard to be a high school girl. The only cool thing about high school girls are their school uniforms…and anal sex parties that I heard about on Oprah, that I never seem to be invited to.

Bonus – If You Think Nicole Scherzinger Music is a Bonus –

Preview of Her Baby Love Song Remixed and Featuring Will.I.Am
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Related Posts

Nicole Scherzinger’s Got Some Cleavage
Nicole Scherzinger’s Baby Love Video is Hot
Nicole Scherzinger’s Nipple in a Video
Nicole Scherzinger Tight Bodied at some Event in Jeans

Posted in:Busted Face|Legs|Nicole Scherzinger|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Demi Moore Bikini Pictures of the Day

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I once randomly met a dude who decided to open up to me about how he fell in love with a girl in a picture. I am not talking about you perverts who print up these celebrity pics and scrap book them to cum on at a later date when your mom’s out of town on business, I am talking about a girl who was on a picture at a bed and breakfast he was staying at in the South of France, I guess he’s a romantic like that and I joked about whether his picture went to the beach and got topless with him and if they had sex while having a picnic eating baguette and cheese while drinking cheap bottles of when and he wasn’t laughing, he was lookin’ traumatized.

He went on to tell me that day after day he would see this picture of a beautiful girl and he would obsess over it, like lying in bed at night thinking about who the mystery girl was. By the fourth night he cracked, and snuck down and got the picture and jerked off to it, because he was in love and wanted to consummate their relationship. The next day he had decided to ask the woman who owned the bed and breakfast who the girl in the picture was and she said it was her daughter when she was 20, the summer before she died in a car accident 10 years earlier.

I feel like that jerking off to dead people, is kinda the same feeling you’d get having sex with Demi Moore. Here are her bikini pictures.


Related Posts:

Vintage Demi Moore Nudes Before She Launched Her Career Cuz Naked is the Way to Fame
Ashton Kutcher’s Mustache
Demi Moore’s Nipple
Rumer Willis is Lookin’ Good Sweetheart

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Demi Moore|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Petra Nemcova’s Doing Good in Haiti of the Day

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I’ve decided that Haiti is my kind of country. Not because I am black or because I speak their obscure language, or because I am a taxi driver, but because motherfucker’s are poor and I feel like it’s a place I could feel like Kanye West on my wife’s disability check.

Either way, they recruit a hot washed up model to do charity because she’s only washed up from being caught in the Tsunami and shit killed her boyfriend, it’s pretty obvious that she’s still got it going on in a mail bride kinda way, unlike me, which is why I’d do good in Haiti. I feel like they’d appreciate my work ethic.

I was lookin’ at the pics of Petra Nemcova propped up so everyone could see her hot Eastern European ass pretending to support them, because it’s a good PR move for her celebrity and they are using collapsable chairs as the stage because that’s how classy Haiti is. It’s more ghetto than the shit I used to sit on in AA and broke through because I am fat, or the milk crate I use as a desk, or the box I use as my dinning room table next to my stained mattress I found outside 2 summers ago.

Either way, it’s nice to see her supporting black people with her charity that she started, I am sure more black people will bust nut thinking of her than ever before and there nothing wrong with using your money for good, because I know, if I ever had money, I’d only help myself get more drunk than I already do and on a more regular basis while sitting on a beach surrounded by hookers, but I’m just not a good of a person and karma likes to remind me of that every chance it gets, by never giving me money to get drunk on beaches with hookers….


Related Posts:

Petra Nemcova is Cleopatra on Halloween
Petra Nemcova’s Upskirt
Petra Nemcova’s Got Some Hot Naked Tits
Petra Nemcova’s Got Hot Clothed Tits

Posted in:Legs|Petra Nemcova|Short Skirt|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – The Victoria’s Secret Angels Fly Virgin Airlines of the Day

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I guess the best thing about the Victoria’s Secret Angels flying Virgin Airlines, is how many virgins jerk off to their pictures everyday. Yes, I am talking to you.

Speaking of talking, I was trying to seduce some model who is in Tampax commercials that I came across on the internet, because I feel like despite having the shittiest website on the internet, models in Tampax commercials should try to get all the free publicity they can get, even if it means letting me watch them shower on webcam to reachout to 6 masturbating dudes, so I figured I’d ask her on a date, not that I’d ever leave my house, but it felt like she’d respond better than asking for nude pics, as I often do and never get. When she rejected me I wrote this:

You weren’t going on a date with me regardless, because I don’t do dates, they are a waste of time, and I don’t leave my house, but I used to fuck wannabe models and they were also a waste of time, but at least I get to see them doing things they wouldn’t want their father seeing, unless they were from a dirty family….which sometimes happens because I met them at the bus stop and they were teenage runaways, who weren’t really wannabe models, but didn’t seem to mind the camera when they were sleeping….

She never responded. Either way, marrying a lingerie or bikini model’s always been a dream of mine that I kind of fell short on, like I have with most of my dreams. I never thought I’d end up with someone you’d think would be a good spokesperson for Dunkin’ Donuts, until we got our rejection letter from them because despite bitch being a great customer, her morbid obesity takes away from the message they are trying to get out to young mother’s on the go. Apparently fat doesn’t sell, but it does kill, just not fast enough, not that I want her dead, but it’d be a nice vacation….but not as nice as one on a plane with these bitches, because I hear there are no laws once you’re off the ground….and exposing myself vagina shaped penis, because I am an inny not an outty and that would be the best way to convince them that I am one of them and that they can trust me enough to show me their vaginas and let me watch them pee. When I do it in the park, I always seem to get in trouble.


Related Posts:

Heidi Klum is a Cat on Halloween
Alessandra Ambrosio is a Playboy Bunny on Halloween
Alessandra Ambrosio is a Slut
Adriana Lima is Hot of Pirelli in a See Through Outfit

Posted in:Adriana Lima|Alessandra Ambrosio|Heidi Klum|Unsorted|Victoria's Secret