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Dua Lipa Simulates Bouncing on Cock on Stage of the Day

Ozempic Katy Perry Still Gross of the Day

Sydney Sweeney Riding a Paddle Board Erotica of the Day

Dora Madison Burge Nipples of the Day

Britney Spears Dance Video of the Day

2020

Aug

Blonde Alexis Ren Booty of the Day

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I don’t know if Alexis Ren invented the slutty arm candy in paradise / travel influencer shit….but I know she was one of the first to go viral with her boyfriend at the time.

They would basically go to epic places and do epic things that looked like they were trying to recreate travel brochures for the instagram generation….you know hot young couple jumping into the waker, under water, creating some fantasy for old ladies who read romance novels, or who used to have screensavers in their shitty menial jobs of epic places…those empty soul bitches who just crave romance, beach, sex…all that good stuff…

I do know that Alexis Ren went legit viral, even got on Dancing with the Stars, sure, it was in part because ABC wanted to get young viewers, which didn’t work because these huge media companies think casting an influencer people see streaming 24/7 will be enough to get them to tune in on TV, when really no one is that involved in any of these people, except maybe the Kardashians, and just watch their lives because they have nothing else to do or because they don’t know who else to follow on social media…but she went viral enough for the producers of the show to be like “We need her”…

I also know local girls who saw this girl as someone they could emulate, so they’d book their all inclusive resort trips to capture as much content of slutty girl posing on the beach and shit became a default vacation picture….so whether she invented the romantic slutty influencer travel blogger or not doesn’t matter…she got the most coverage for it…

I don’t know what Alexis Ren does now, but I assume she’s got money, still gets paid for this nonsense, at least enough to get fake tits, and she’s still out here being slutty, but not overly slutty, to maintain that low level celebrity that is I guess high level celebrity now that celebrity is a vague concept since everyone is famous or pretends to be or thinks they are…you know what I mean.

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Posted in:Alexis Ren

2020

Aug

Camila Mendes Twerk Workout of the Day

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Camila Mendes is Hollywood taking extreme liberty with the Betty Character from the Archie Comics you may have been into because she was the rich one with the awesome house….because Hollywood is trying to be inclusive and they can’t just have white people on the show…especially when they re-work the Lodge Family to be a criminal family….you know put the HISPANICS in there, or are they called LatinX because some entitled white person decided to call them LatinX, remove the gender because gender is wrong, weirdness I am sure 90 percent of Latinos don’t appreciate…but that the media runs with because inclusivity or some shit…

Well, in being a young girl in Hollywood trying to stay relelvant on Social Media, the typically chubby, neckless and unattractive on the Show has brought a twerk in leggings…and this is probably the best we’ve seen her, at least enough evidence of why or how she got into the show…something I’ve been confused about since seeing the first episode….but if the LatinX can shake that ass…give her the part…

Then she posted a pretty racy ass pic because girls are fucking mental in their shameless self promotion and exhibitionism…I mean…this is a crazy angle for a bikini pic from an actress…I mean a Cam Girl, and IG girl, but a working actress…I guess all those lines are blurred.

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Posted in:Camila Mendes

2020

Aug

Ariel Winter Hot Tub Porno of the Day

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Ariel Winter is rocking the crop, not the crop top, but the cropping of the photo that showcases her already cut off at least once titties, because she experienced trauma at a young age and went through puberty early enough to need to cut the titties off at 16….I remember when that happened, not because I ever watched Modern Family, the only acting job Ariel Winter will ever have, but because the tabloids loved talking about her 16 year old tits being cut off…which was weird but Hollywood…ya know….

So yeah, the anchor scar titties with the properly placed re-sized nipple probably hang better than whatever terrifying mess was there before the surgery…..but unfortunately Ariel Winter, tits or not, is just troll-like…even when trying to be cute…cropping out her gut because she eats shit and is fat again…you know because her parents sold her to the industry as a kid making her a victim you should all feel sorry for because it’s a sad storyline even if it made her a lot of money and I for one hate parents who push their kids into this garbage industry for their own dreams of fame and personal gain… when you stop looking at her tits.

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Posted in:Ariel Winter

2020

Aug

Halle Berry Bikini of the Day

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I guess I should rename this site “aging celebrities you once jerked off to dot com”…because it’s just a constant series of disappointments as every girl I post on here is some “once hot 10 years or more ago”….from Mischa Barton’s spilling out of her bikini bottoms as much as her bikini top…to Heather Graham…all while there’s so much new pussy out there, more new pussy than ever out there, but because celebrity has taken a whole new meaning, don’t have the legacy these ones have…even though none of this shit really means anything….a half white, raised white, suburban girl playing black people for a Racist Hollywood because she could easily speak their white language thanks to being white, while just as easily mocking the black people she related to on a white suburban level…because I am sure she was teased for her darker skin, but that’s a little different than growing up poor as shit turning to the streets or whatever…

What I am saying is that before white people did the whole Black Lives Matter nonsense to fight systemmic racism, and before Zoe Saldana cried about not being black enough to play Nina Simone, I was there saying “Halle Berry is white as shit and her playing black people is racist shit”….well she’s posting up some bikini pics like she’s not 50…because I guess her black genetics are a reminder that Black don’t Crack….while white does..so that deadbeat black daddy who donated his sperm to her pervert BBC mom gave her those superior black genes that allow her to have a hot body into her senior years…and I appreciate more than she probably does, you know all those daddy issues…

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Posted in:Halle Berry

2020

Aug

EmRatCow Pussy Hole Playing Ball of the Day

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Em Rata is getting pretty brave, I mean she’s going out there for her hired paparazzi to get some legitimate press in the legitimate tabloids who like to post up celebrity bikini pics to their sites for the views…..I can relate.

I know what you’re thinking, how could that be bravery, all she’s doing is going out there in a bikini, which as a nude model who is known for being nude, is actually more clothed than she usually is when trying to get attention.

But the reason it is brave is because all these girls photoshop the fuck out of themselves, even when playing the whole feminism card, or the whole down with the patriarchy despite having had sex with Kanye but more interestingly David Fincher AND Ben Affleck to get in the movie she did with them….a rumor that I’ve been told is truth from an industry insider…and I wouldn’t care if it was true or not…I mean I’m sure you’d even fuck Ben Affleck for a part in a movie…and you’re a dude…because that’s life changing shit, stamp of approval shit, plus he’s Ben Affleck and we all need to get AIDS at least once….right?

Anyway…she’s out here in a skimpy bikini that from my perspective looks like her pussy may be sticking it’s tongue out as us, as pussies do when they are saying “you can’t have me, but you can jerk off to me, just use google”….some school yard mocking you’re likely used to because the hot chicks don’t like you…

Now, I am a firm believer that EmRata is a lot of hype, a lot of legacy of going viral early on IG and no one cares about her, but I can see her ass from the front and that’s always a way to redeem yourself….the only downer is that she’s not rocking a full fucking bush like she should be after all those feminism claims…but yeah, for not being photoshopped, this is the best she’s looked in a while, so she’s bringing it…or maybe she’s just looking good from far….but far from good…distorted by the zoom lens or whatever…either way….good old fashioned bikini paparazzi pics for you…

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Posted in:Emrata

2020

Aug

Heather Graham Bikini of the Day

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Heather Graham posted up a bikini pic because she’s got great tits that have been very kind to her over the years, in part because they haven’t got cancer yet and killed her, but also because she got some pretty amazing movie parts because of the tits, from Boogie Nights, which is really what put her on the map….and I guess Austin Powers which I only saw once back when it was a thing….and left it at that…because it annoyed me then and I am sure I’d fucking hate it now…but Heather Graham is amazing even in her old age.

Coincidentally, my friend Steve sent me the Heather Graham origin story this weekend, which was basically that her dad was an FBI agent, her mom a school teacher and Children’s book author, and by 9 they ended up in California.

So dropped out of college to pursue acting full time and in 1988 she was in Corey Haim (RIP)/ Corey Feldman – License to Drive, a movie I last saw in 1988 and didn’t realize she was the “babe” in it until today…I’m not a very good celebrity blogger because I really don’t care…

The interesting part of this is that her strict parents forbade her to accept a role in the black comedy Heathers which had an expletive-rich script….and which became Heathers….an iconic and still referenced movie even on TikTok today….good job FBI AGENT narc dad….who if he’s still alive and he may be even though she’s so fucking old…could probably come after me in ways I’d rather avoid…because unlike the TikTok generation, I am not into this whole internet privacy / tracking situaton, so we’ll just leave it at that…

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Posted in:Heather Graham

2020

Aug

What is Wrong with Emilia Clarke of the Day

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Emilia Clarke looks like she’s channelled some of that Game of Thrones sci/fi fantasy shit and glued it to her damn stomach, because there is some lizard skin going on here and I don’t know how hot that is to the non Game of Thrones fans, since you’re likely like me and don’t find Emilia Clarke anything special…

But the funniest thing about this bikini pic is not even the aligator skin on her midsection, it’s her lack of neck that makes her look like some kind of dwarf preemie freak with a massive head ready to do that cerebral palsy walk off the boat that she’d blame on “sea legs’ but that is actually dude to a genetic disorder of sorts…

There’s nothing hot going on here….but this is what high paid celebs look like in their luxurious lives…pretty shit.

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Posted in:Emilia Clarke

2020

Aug

January Jones See Through of the Day

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January Jones is probably best known for being the single mother to Jason Sudeikis’ kid, has found social media, and like all the whores who climbed the ranks of hollywood being whores, she’s found it an easy transition from actress who was lucky enough to land one solid role, to self obsessed selfie taker who gives a bit of skin to her pervert fans, knowing it gets more likes and follows, which is a currency especailly to the already rich…and bored…because celebrities just sit around their houses all day when they aren’t working, which in January Jones’ case is all the fucking time….and there’s always a pool to press the mom pussy up against the jet….before or after taking a bikini tit shot for the fans.

This is not a bikini tit shot, it’s a see through dress kind of thing that you know is equally an attempt to get some praise or at least get jerked off to by the fans, because like cam girls, pornstars and basically all women, they like being jerked off to…even when they claim to hate men, the patriarchy and all that misogyny shit….they actually fucking love it and get off to it.

The latest January Jones news is that she was flirting with NBA player Kawhi Leonard, who I think was the guy that made Toronto Raptors win the NBA championship, despite Kawhi having a girlfriend because that’s just how a woman who would end up a single mother behaves “put the dick in me, figure it out later”…

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Posted in:January Jones

2020

Aug

Jordyn Jones Biker Babe of the Day

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Jordyn Jones must be pretty excited that the world, or at least America, which I guess defines what is popular in the world, at least Americans would like to think that, you know the whole being the center of the world and shit….but yeah, Jordyn Jones must be excited that the world is into dancing at the level they are into dancing…because like Julianne Hough, she should have ended up a stripper, like most professinal trained dancers who don’t come from money, but instead she’s a trending dancer doing dumb choreography that I find embarrassing or at least stupid, mainly because it doesn’t end with girl getting naked at the end, or girl available for private shows at the end.

ANYWAY, she’s some Michigan trash, she’s going to end up 300 pounds with heavy metal poisoning because of that whole Michigan water system, but for now she’s making money in California, more than stripepr money, otherwise she’d be a stripper…

People seem to like her, she’s a young, fit, blonde chick…so here she is in some leather looking biker looking outfit for South Dakota Bike Week…

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Posted in:Jordyn Jones

2020

Aug

Mischa Barton Bikini of the Day

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I used to do a Celebrity Death Watch post that no one gave a fuck about because I have zero influence and you’re just here for the tits….but it was about 10 or 12 years ago and for a while I focused on Mischa Barton because she looked like fucking shit.

She’s 34 now, so she would have been 22 or 23 after her success from The O.C. that basically ended with the O.C because she could barely act and no one gave a fuck about seeing her in anything but the O.C….I guess.

Anyway, she was clearly on drugs, she was fat as shit, she looked like fucking death and she was involved in a few episodes that were some crackhead level episodes of causing scenes outside her apartment and other things that you’d expect her to be dead from…however the body clearly a resilient thing and she survived….barely…considering the only work she’s got was on a Reality Show that didn’t recast her for Season 2….but she’s not officially dead…and as it turns out she’s enjoying life in 2020, I guess they have her on the right anti-depressants, and she’s got her chubby tits out in a bikini which is probably the best she’s looked in a while because who knew she had tits…not me….I was too busy waiting for her to die in one of her episodes to notice…

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Posted in:Mischa Barton