DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

25

Mar

Fiona Gubelmann Nipples for TV of the Day

Fiona Gubelmann is an actress, but her name sounds like someone excited for thanksgiving dinner….you know ready to gobble up the meal….gobble gobble…

Her name doesn’t sound familiar though..but it is one of those moments where you may want to take Olivia Wilde’s lead and give yourself a stage name…

The history of Hollywood is based on Jewish people giving themselves non Jewish names to manipulate the media and the audience into not being racist against them….because the audience was racist against them….if they knew what they were dealing with….it was America after all…and the changing of the name didn’t compromise anything for anyone, it was just basic marketing to not alienate yourself….and to let your true self not be lost in superficial shit with a name…..

She’s out there with her tits out for TV…but not out there with some fucking name that makes her tits for TV more appealing….

Strippers have been doing it forever, built that character, that celebrity version of yourself…no one cares about GUBELMANN….give us something hotter to fall into….basic fucking marketing…that clearly she understands since her tits are out…no one needs to be faced with the name GUBELMANN when looking at tits…Seriously.

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Posted in:Fiona Gubelmann|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Ireland Baldwin Still Trying to be Hot of the Day

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Ireland Baldwin called her a pig when she was a little kid. It was a public statement that was released during his divorce to her mom Kim Bassinger…and it circulated around the world in an era when calling a woman, and a little girl a pig, didn’t ruin your career. He went on unscathed to play Donald Trump on SNL…amongst other hit roles in hit shows making stupid money….even though you’d think if he was to do that today…he’d be blacklisted…even if you look at Ireland Baldwin in these slutty content pics she’s been producing to get noticed…because even at 6 foot 5 and 240 lbs….she has a hard time getting noticed….you’d have think maybe her dad, who knows her best, was speaking truths and facts…and she is the pig he said she was…I mean that’s the story these pics are telling me…and pics don’t lie…unless they are slutty selfies on instagram which they are probably a lie thanks to photo retouching apps that help girls recreate their body shape.

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Posted in:Ireland Baldwin|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Kendall Jenner Bikini of the Day

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I got my twitter suspended because I made a comment about trans people not being women, but being dudes who cut off their genitals doing their best woman impression, and the whole thing is pretty offensive for women, to allow a man to think the complexities that make her a woman are as simple as not having a dick….it’s undermining and reducing the beauty of womanhood by some people with mental illness claiming to be a woman….I believe that is a FACTUAL statement…and twitter I guess wants no transphobia, when I am not transphobic, I just don’t think trans and being an actual woman are the same thing….

I don’t buy into Kendall Jenner’s dad cutting off his dick and all of a sudden being a woman….

I think there are so many levels of disgusting to the kardashian / jenner empire and that is one aspect..

That’s not even the whole point of the post, the point is I created a new twitter – not that anyone cares – called @drunkenstepfat ….and the first recommendations they sent me were Kim K and the Jenners…based on nothing at all other than that they are the clickbait that all platforms rely on to stay in business I guess…or they have a deal to keep the relevant…and the whole thing annoys me so much I can’t appreciate Kendall’s young, fit, plastic surgery body backlit so I don’t need to see her cunt face…

Garbage is Garbage is Garbage…

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Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Katy Perry Cameltoe of the Day

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Katy Perry is looking like a Twink from the late 80s who just found out he got The Gay Cancer…too fat to be full blown AIDS…but he just found out about the Gay Cancer….there’s plenty of time left for him to waste away…

You see, this bitch looks unhealthy, sloppy and out of shape…dumpy in her athletic pants that she’s clearly not wearing cuz she’s athletic….a popstar who was really fucking lucky to have a career..thanks to a viral song that happened at the right time and a series of moves that kept her earning….

It’s a story of the least compelling act, with the lowest level of talent, from an inability to sing and dance…to a look an style that was really just badly executed…who thanks to the naivety of the audience…the stupidity of the audience…the lack of taste of the audience…was able to cash the fuck in….

I will never understand her celebrity…and I will never believe she has a vagina…cuz it’s against my policy to think of ugly thing sexually, at least on the internet…in person…I’d stick my dick in dock shit if I had to….and I have had to. You know…in order to cum.

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Posted in:Katy Perry|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Irina Shayk Almost Naked for Glamour Italia of the Day

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I don’t know why Irina Shayk’s nipples are aiming in different directions, like some cockeyed retard with brain damage…

I just know that despite having sold herself off to Brad Cooper…Irina Shayk is still one of the hottest models out of Russia – as far as I’m concerned.

She’s old, she’s a mom, she’s probably had a lot of work done, lots of face injections, probably not entirely a naturally hot Russian model…but she climbed her way out of communism…through the Siberian mountains…or maybe it was by fucking some Portuguese Soccer Player…either way…she made it to America. Did Sports Illustrated and then finally existed in the world…so Brad Cooper, some whining bitch of a celebrity manipulated her in and as a Russian who doesn’t know better, I mean they used to wait in line for black market Levis Jeans..she figured he was a good option to breed with and secure her future. Smart Russian…they are trained spies and know how to manipulate men with their vaginas…they were bred that way and the ones who didn’t excel were killed off…leaving us with great Fem Bots like Irina Shayk….and her cockeyed drunk retard nipples.

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Posted in:Irina Shayk|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Sailor Brinkley Cook Self Breast Exam of the Day

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Sailor Brinkley Cook is a fine example of diluted genetics thanks to the hot mom marrying rich ugly dude who charmed her with his money….lifestyle and kindness…because dude was an earner and ready to buy himself a model wife after years of hard work and buying everything else for himself…

Sailor Brinkley Cook is skinny, she’s in a bikini often, but she isn’t hot…and we can collectively blame her mother for that…

Already rich Christie Brinkley didn’t think to just be satisfied with all her money, and breed with someone who would create a good looking child…she was instead charmed by the money…and forced to create this…

Diluted Genetics…but she’s rich and will be fine..not everyone is cut out to be a model, not everyone needs to be a model to feel good about themselves, some people are fine looking average at best, knowing their piss is worth more than you, without ever having to work a day in their life.

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Posted in:Sailor Brinkley|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Kelli Berglund Naked Again of the Day

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Kelli Berglund.. the Disney Kid starring in the Gregg Araki TV show….that is about young people fucking, something he’s been documenting for literally 25 years, and that for some reason got him a TV show finally, which is pretty much a sign of the times, because when I rented his movie, on VHS I think, back in 1995, from some fringe videostore, which is something that used to exist, in all my pervert well versed in porn glory, I knew I saw he fucking future…

I knew that eventually, nudity and sex would be accepted by TV….because it is human fucking nature…not to mention all the people in entertainment are godless perverts….and people at their core are all fucking perverts…and when the masses were ok with sex, the ads would be ok with sex, and everyone would be able to jack off together in peace….while monetizing sex….like they are Kelli Berglund, the Disney Kid reinventing herself by being cast in a Gregg Araki show…masturbating to The Happy Hooker…naughty…

It took 25 years, well a little less…but it is only logical that if you’re paying a bitch a day rate and her character masturbates, that she better fucking masturbate on camera, it’s called acting..

The grey area of “is it porn, is it mainstream” is here…and eventually it will all just be porn…cuz porn always wins…I should have got into porn production instead of blogging….but here I am blogging instead cuz I haven’t had to leave my couch, which is far more convenient than actually trying.

All this to say, I am into porn on mainstream. It’s a passion of mine. I am into Disney Kids like Kelli Berglund going porno in the mainstream. It’s a good look for her.

Here she is doing what I thought was lesbian sex..

and here she is pissing …

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Posted in:Kelli Berglund

2019

25

Mar

Elizabeth Turner Tits of the Day

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I am not trying to attach myself to this Elizabeth Turner girl, but I will say that when she first started at this big titty modeling thing, right when she finished college, whoever was doing her hustling on her social media, likely a boyfriend reached out to me to promote her slutty photoshoots with her big natural tits…..because big natural tits get noticed, people get excited….

I figured if they were reaching out to me, they were fucking reaching, and probably got through to every other website who decided to promote her big tits…..getting her a following but never really breaking through in my “world”….which isn’t a very dialled in world, but I never see her name come up….

Now, 4-5 years later, her tits have been leaked, took fucking long enough, that would have been step one in the DrunkenStepfather – Jesus Martinez – School of getting famous…

Who needs a bitch 4-5 years later topless…when 4-5 years ago was her time..

I do think that great big natural tits are timeless, until they sag into a pile of slop as they do….so seeing them is good….not a too little too late situation….but a situation…a nude selfie situation that is perfect to help her go viral cuz there is nothing scandalous….just tits…and tits are great…

Posted in:Elizabeth Turner

2019

25

Mar

Bebe Rexha Erotica of the Day

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Good ol Bebe Rexha…the Albanian who is disappointing her dad with her slutty porno behavior that doesn’t seem like slutty or porno behavior to her or her peers…since this is the norm…but to old timers like me, and I guess her dad…it’s just trashy shamelessness that we’d expect from some attention seeking whore…not from every single woman everywhere…without remember that ever single women everywhere is an insecure attention seeking whore…and now that it’s normal and mainstream for them to behave like this, they all do it, hoping to fit in..

They call it the patriarchy, but they do it to them damn sense…the mainstream competing for eyeballs with the porn scene cuz the porn scene is more rewarding cuz you get to see cunt.

The point is that this fat chick is near 30, and has been in the industry ignored for years, only to come out tits a blazing for the world to see her and it was only when her tits were a blazing…whoring out all over the place that she was noticed…cuz tits get hits…

It doesn’t mean her hit songs are of value or actual hits….but people don’t care about quality anyway so she’ll bank money with her masturbatory low quality fodder….and feel good about her fat self as she makes all the money she needs to eat all the bad foods her fat ass wants…you know like the next Christina Aguilera.

The whole thing is pretty gross…but it’s busty gross.

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Posted in:Bebe Rexha|SFW

2019

25

Mar

Carolina Marie Bikini of the Day

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Carolina Marie is some model who has practiced her model face and went with it.. in every single photo.. her she is for a swimsuit photoshoot.

Is she a robot, I don’t know…I’d assume she’s void of most substance, except maybe the substance of casting directors and producers who she lays down for as their sex doll…cuz that face…is fucking dead…but still interesting enough to stare at when cumming inside her I guess…

Her face is always looking the fucking same, but new tits for us, are new tits and in her quest to bring her one facial expression to the top of the charts, it is our duty to supper her as the new tits we’ve never heard of…follow her…and encourage her for more…

I did my part, and SMASHED that follow button….and you should too…cuz one look can be fun when it’s half naked…in different poses…selling bikinis….or whatever the fuck is going on here.

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Posted in:Carolina Marie|SFW