DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

22

Mar

Constance Jablonski in a Bikini of the Day

Constance Jablonski is one of those well known models no one actually know or cares about, but she gets fucking paid, stealing your American jobs, not interested in making America great, just leaching off the system……

Not that this shoot is for an American brand, it’s for Zara, straight from the slums of europe, which is also just stealing American dollars, but infiltrating their malls….

This isn’t really something you can jerk off to, at least not top level, but I think you have the ability jerk off anything and part of my job is throwing masturbation obstacles at you…

Posted in:Constance Jablonski|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Barbara Palvin See Through Photoshoot of the Day

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Barbara Palvin has nipples…fascinating…considering she’s a human and they all have nipples.

You perverts need to stop sexualizing women, and you need to realize that this slut shaming girls who are too hot to fuck you, is outdated and your body shaming these women who objectify themselves and get paid tens of thousands of dollars a day to be a body that sells product is not progressive at all. It is outdated thinking that goes against supporting women, or allowing them to be empowered while brands pay them a lot of money to be the body that sells product for them…not that Palvin gets that much work, she’s too big…but she is in the media in this shoot and that counts for something…only because of the nipples…..because I sexualize nipples…thanks to being a man.

Posted in:Barbara Palvin

2017

22

Mar

Bella Hadid Shows 10 Percent Maybe 15 Percent of her Tit While Selena Gomez Dances of the Day

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Overrated Bella Hadid – the model who everyone likes to work with except The Weeknd because he upgrated to a SELENA Gomez….who can be seen here with her new face that he fucks…which is substantially hotter…

While Bella Hadid posted a picture of her overpaid tranny looking face to her social media – without turning her back to what she’s got going for her – because there’s 10 – 15% of her tits….which some may find exciting…if you’re really into cleavage…like a 7 year old boy who’s never seen porn….

I guess this is her low level attention seeking, cuz she’s a basic rich girl who is randomly celebrated because her sister went VIRAL with the Kardashians and this is the trickle down effect of LAZY bookers booking…

“We can’t get a Jenner, or that other Hadid, they are too expensive, go with her straggler latch on sister, riding the coattails and taking the spilloverwork”……because we live in a world of groupies who just want to be as close to whatever is deemed the action….

Posted in:Bella Hadid|Selena Gomez|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Slutty Model Sisters Leveraging that they are Sisters to Make Their Topless Shoot Go Further of the Day

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Sarah Halpin and Joanna Halpin are sisters…who are making moves, very slowly, as models who get naked – both doing the same hustle because both come from the same household and have the same moral and value system – but who know above all and most importantly – as the Budwesier Twins and the Playboy Twins of our era….knew…that two is better than one – and when girls get naked together – while related – even if it’s not a big deal – and they aren’t eating each other out…magic gets set off in our soul….

This is as trashy as all the other TWINS….but it’s the instagram era…where the quality and posing of images is less trashy…it’s soft lit, soft focus, posted romantically but the underlying message is still the same…trash…and if this is TRASH I am happy to be both the garbage man picking it up, or the homeless man digging through it for food scraps to sustain….

Posted in:Joanna Halpin|Sarah Halpin

2017

22

Mar

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Hard Nipples in a Bikini for Love Magazine’s Spring Video of the Day

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Love Magazine had so much success with their YOUTUBE channel – that they finally decided to go POOTIE PIE…and create more hot content for YOUTUBE….fashion porn that GOOGLE can run ads on…because that’s where the eyeballs are and the idea of trying to trick people to go to your site to run ads….is a dying art…while giving into the corporate monster by giving them your content to make money off you is the only answer…or way to get famous..

So what was once a fashion magazine, is now a Youtube / Google employee…./ Instagram / Facebook Employee…because the WEB is dead….but youtube is the fucking answer….at least when they get their March “Spring Break Series” up with Alessandra Ambrosio and her big old fake tits and hard nipples..

She also did a photoshoot…for some other bullshit…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Kate Hudson Photoshoot of the Day

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Kate Hudson – the vagina that attempted murder Owen Wilson with her slutty, spoiled and entitled brats raised in hollywood vagina behavior…is in a Magazine posing slutty enough for me….because she’s photoshopped…

I watch her Facebook lives where she pretends to be a wholesome fitness chick who owns some fitness brand because she does…that’s the beauty of being rich and famous, make money from all kinds of places, all thanks to making money from your allowance, before your parents make their friends hire her in their moves that require zero to no acting talent…but rather just being the body needed to drive the shitty storyline home…

She ignores my questions on Facebook live….because she’s an asshole – she’s also looking real haggard, she’s looking real old, she’s got the botox and fake tits but it’s not working on her live streams…but shit’s alright in Harper’s Bazaar….young mom bounced back when she was young – but it looks like shit’s caught up to her…as she nears menopause….but not when she’s professionally shot, lit and made up….she can still push this..

Posted in:Kate Hudson|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Bojana ‘Bo’ Krsmanovic for Maxim of the Day

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Bojana Krsmanovic is a 25 year old Serbian model with big tits – who could be or could have been a sex worker – because of the whole Eastern European hot thing – but who cares if she is or not – because all girls are sex workers in their own right – they just won’t admit it – but will instead claim to be empowered – because it is empowering to get paid for being hot – whether as a model – or in SI Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue 2016…

Well now Maxim has taken her over to say “huge tits on a skinny frame from Eastern Europe”….must be celebrated in their photoshoot for a magazine that also covers Dax Shepard….TOP NOTCH.

I lost my virginity to a Serbian prostitute who couldn’t speak English but who was somehow here and she didn’t charge me…so I have a soft spot in my heart for these kind people…even though I didn’t cum when I lost my virginity. Something VERY important to this post – because Human Trafficking and Serbians is all I know…

I just checked her INSTAGRAM and I’m in love….

It’s too bad she only hit at 25…I mean that’s retirement age for models…but we got a good year in her…

Posted in:Bojana ‘Bo’ Krsmanovic|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Megan Fox Photoshopped to Shit Mom Butt Shot of the Day

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Megan Fox the TRANSFORMATIVE TRANSFORMER ACTRESS who looks TRANS thanks to all the PLASTIC surgery…..who has 12 kids with A-Lister Brian Austin Green…is the face of Fredrick’s of Hollywood, or the ass, because they’ve been bought from an out of touch brand that doesn’t realize a trashy plastic surgery ridden mom – who was once the hot chick in movies…a decade ago…isn’t the best face / or booty / or implants but I guess the brand director thinks she is. The kind of pervert still jerking off to old photoshoots thinking “this will be great, we’ll do the alba with her”…..when really, there are 100,000 instagram sluts you can give 100 dollars to do to the same thing…and get far more relevance…but cutting this twat a check…that makes total sense..look at all the press they get from it….as we look on confused as to why trashy lingerie….like hooker sex shop lingerie that will give you yeast infections….but that can’t give Megan Fox yeast infections…her pussy’s too scarred…at least according to the research I’ve done….

Posted in:Megan Fox|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Ashley Graham Fat Chick Making Fat Chick Erotica Out of Carbs Cuz She’s Fat for Breakfast of the Day

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Ashley Graham is a fat chick and as a fat chick she gets really fucking excited about carbs…it’s the reason she’s fat in the first place….it’s like fill that belly up with as many baked goods as possible…two bagels…fuck yeah…let’s do a titty dance for my feeder fans…and for myself…and then eat two more…because bitch is a big…fucking pig…and now all the fat chicks can celebrate this fat chick and her fat chick scamming trying to prove that she’s empowered and loves being fat by playing with her one true love that will kill her….food…

Breakfast with Ashley Graham gets more intense when the cameras turn off and she shoves bananas in her asshole…because FRUIT….EWWW….use that to reverse feed myself…