DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

26

Feb

Dakota Fanning in a Tight Dress of the Day

Here’s some Dakota Fanning getting some free shit because OSCARS!!

Good thing she doesn’t need to spend that hard earned money on buying her own shit…good thing she can focus that insane amount of money she has for doing very little of substance for herself…and just use her celebrity as a currency to get free shit…good thing she gets paid stupid amounts of money so that she doesn’t need to spend it on useless CHANEL things…because that would be wrong to pay her all this money and expect her to carry a brand’s bag for free…

I understand why celebs don’t pay for shit, because shit like Chanel actually costs very little to produce, a 30,000 dollar purse costs that brand 300 bucks, so to give a bitch like Dakota Fanning a 300 dollar purse that they pretend is 20,000 dollars, sells a lot of purses, and even if it’s just one, they’ve already made 100 times their money..

I just think it’s funny that rich people get everything for free, but not as funny as the faces that Dakota Fanning…CHILD OSCAR NOMINEE is making…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Dakota Fanning|SFW

2016

26

Feb

Shay Mitchell in a Bikini of the Day

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Canada’s very own cunt, Shay Mitchell is in a bikini for her social media because if you’re in Miami doing some bullshit campaign, you might as well get into a bikini selfie, because that’s what being a vapid cunt is about…it’s like there’s so much you could be doing, but instead I’m going to pose for my fucking self….form 1000 different angles to get the perfect one…because I love being in pictures…because I’m a vapid cunt..

I just can’t imagine this girl having an ounce of anything good to offer the world…I think she’s just garbage…garbage that would be polluting the ocean…if she wasn’t so busy taking iphone pics…

She does FITNESS Porn too – Obviously

A video posted by Shay Mitchell (@shaym) on Feb 24, 2016 at 3:08pm PST

Posted in:SFW|Shay Mitchell

2016

26

Feb

Kerris Dorsey Is 18 and 1 Month of the Day

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Kerris Dorsey stars as Bridget Donovan on the Showtime crime drama series Ray Donovan. I’ve never seen the show, I’ve never even heard of the show, so I can’t imagine her pervert fan base coming from there, I will assume that it is from all the work she’s done with Disney, because that’s where the Perverts find their new jailbait to jerk off to….

Not that Kerris Dorsey is considered Jailbait right now, she’s 18 and month, and that’s legal and far less creepy than when she was 17 and 11 months…

Right?

She’s not that cute…she’s not that slutty…which is probably why no one has heard of her…but the good news is that she’s 18 and 1 month and has at least 3 – 5 more years to start leaking nudes…

I mean – I have a bigger follower on social media and I’m not some jailbait teen from TV…with a team of PR people and an innate teen skill to rock out on social media and get famous in 6 second clips…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kerris Dorsey|SFW

2016

26

Feb

Victoria’s Secret Shoot of the Day

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Victoria’s Secret released some really exclusive, next level, innovative, different, unique, creative, amazing, pictures promoting product that are exactly the fucking same as they’ve always fucking been…because that’s how you build a brand…just keep repeating and repeating…for some reason, it doesn’t work for me, since every post I do is the goddamn same…but I guess I’m not some immigrant half naked pussy…right

Posted in:SFW|Victoria's Secret

2016

26

Feb

J.Lo Robot of the Day

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I saw this video of a fat and pregnant Kelly Clarkson singing some shitty fucking song about her kids or her dad or some nonsense…to celebrate being the first winner of American Idol in their final season, since it’s holding on by a thread….

She ended up crying mid song, which made of noise because people love when people cry, and I’ll I could think was “this song is obviously about a burger, she’s singing about that time she dropped a burger on the floor”…

The highlight of the video wasn’t about her losing her burger, but having it come back to her life when she got rich and famous, it was not Keith Urban forcing a good cry because singers are unstable…or Ryan Seacrest’s plastic insincerity…it was J.Lo’s lack of emotion, her bitterness that she wasn’t the one singing on stage, it was the fact that her BOTOX hasn’t been able to make her show any signs of emotion, it was the fact that she’s a fucking ROBOT….and here are her ROBOT Tits…

I mean – this J.Lo bitch is everywhere.

: celebrityflow.ru

: celebrityflow.ru

: celebrityflow.ru

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:J.Lo|SFW

2016

26

Feb

Melina Dimarco is the Nude Model of the Day

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Her name is Melina Dimarco. I’ve never heard of her, but she probably already knows that, which is why she’s doing nude shoots…or maybe she was lured and tricked into the nude shoots due to a drug and alcohol induced psychosis that will only end when she meets a Christian guy who hates that she’s topless on the internet, which will lead to her having her images taken down from all the sites that posted her on her quest to be famous…or maybe…she’s in law school or will be when she doesn’t make it, decides to use her legal knowledge to erase her past….but right now…right now..she’s topless, in men’s underwear like she shit herself at a dude’s house and had to wear a pair of his… showing tits….in some morning sun…all filtered and romantic…and boring…as fuck..

Posted in:Melina Dimarco

2016

26

Feb

Shakira Butt Shot of the Day

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This is what Shakira’s ass has become…

This is what Shakira’s ass was….

Or This one…

I guess this is growing up….making babies….depressing for girls…not so depressing for guys since there are always hot 20 year olds down to fuck an old dude to be freaks…that piss off their parents…even when you’re 70 there will be 20 year olds you can buy…with bodies like Shakira has…especially in third world countries…

I guess this patriarchal regime isn’t so bad…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Shakira

2016

26

Feb

Emily Rat Cow We Can See Your Bush of the Day

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Emily Rat Cow is the fucking worst, the kind of cunt with zero level of “maybe this is going to end”…because for some reason…she think she’s fucking amazing…despite never really doing anything amazing….all while looking ok…but not that amazing…she’s two years of hype in a fast moving world where people forget about people…even ones they are emotionally attached to and Emrata isn’t one anyone is emotionally attached to…she’s just a set of tits…but a great set of tits…maybe not tits that aren’t even .

But she’s got some great fucking tits, and more interestingly, she’s wearing panties where I can see her bush…and I fucking love bush…even on girls who are garbage…

Posted in:Emily Rat Cow|SFW

2016

26

Feb

Cheryl Tiegs Gets it Of the Day

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Cheryl Tiegs was a legendary Sports Illustrated Swim model, back when SI SWIM actually mattered, and like me and pretty much everyone I know, she’s wondering why the brand would put a fat chick on the cover, because no one wants to see a fat girl at a bikini, in fact it’s what ruins hotel pools and public beaches…always making me ask “WHY ISN’T SHE IN A SNOW SUIT”…

I mean, I’m sure she understands that in a world of PC social justice warriors who are fucking reactive as fuck and annoying, putting a fat chick on the cover, is the “i have black friends”….get out of jail free for the rest of the magazine being misogynistic despite the editor being a chick and the chicks in the magazine being chicks who own their sexuality and monetize it via their sex work….

Either way, she’s right, fat girls are vile…here’s her quote…

“I don’t like that we’re talking about full-figured women because it’s glamorizing them because your waist should be smaller than 35 [inches]. That’s what Dr. Oz said, and I’m sticking to it. No, I don’t think it’s healthy. Her face is beautiful. Beautiful. But I don’t think it’s healthy in the long run.”

She got slaughtered by fat girls not working out but instead eating sugary treats at the computer and went onto say that she’s not into anorexic chicks either, because guess what, just because you find fat disgusting and unhealthy because it has been PROVEN to be, doesn’t mean you are into Anorexic chicks either, yet that’s how the world processes “how can she hate fat people”…even though EVERYONE hates fat people – EVEN FAT PEOPLE…THAT IS WHY THEY ARE FAT…because if they didn’t hate themselves, they’d take care of themeselves…Jesus…

Here’s a retrospective of her work..the funny thing is if she was a model today – I’d fucking slaughter her….oh Internet…why do you make me so mean…

Posted in:Cheryl Tiegs|SFW

2016

26

Feb

Bella Hadid for Korea of the Day

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Bella Hadid may not be as hot as a K-Pop band’s insane music video featuring Korean girls twerking and dancing like strippers…but she’s got more Plastic surgery than those girls, who are trying to whitify themselves to look more Hollywood, only she’s doing it to be more like a model…and people are buying into it….

She is more North Korean and robotic than K-Pop..and here she is in Bootleg Vogue, you know Korean Market Vogue, because she’s the Bootleg Hadid sister, which is pretty bootleg, considering the one she’s a bootleg of is still only a model because she’s a rich kid…

I guess what it comes down to is – who cares..

Posted in:Bella Hadid|SFW