DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

22

Jul

Lindsay Lohan Bikini Video of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is the kind of walking corpse pussy that if I found it on the side of the road, I would make a weekend at Bernie’s out of her…until I couldn’t take the smell anymore…

I just like her that fucking much….

Whether swilling / swimming in her lace outfit with those big tits in Mykonos…with rich people she probably works it for…or being half dead, almost forgotten celebrity…who will always be lindsay Lohan…

She’ll always be perfect to me…and not just at swimming and blowing her nose…but at everything…

For Pics of Lindsay Lohan in a Bikini for Love and Life While Half Dead… CLICK HERE

I will always love her.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2015

22

Jul

Irina Shayk in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Irina Shayk is one of the best love stories to happen in modern times…

You know just some Russian girl who got swept off her feet from a possibly gay superstar soccer player…

Allowing her to move to America without him, while remaining his girl for public appearances, because that is love, not escorting….before eventually securing an A-Lister…

Modern day romance…all while being one of the hottest girl’s out there….

I am a fan…but only because I know Russians have no souls and are out for themselves after decades of communist rule, they feel like they deserve it..and in Irina’s case, she does…because less hot girls are Sugar Babying just as hard…it’s just the world we live in…

Here she is in a bikini..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Irina Shayk|SFW

2015

22

Jul

Richard Kern for Purple Magazine of the Day

No Comments »

Richard Kern is an old creep that hangs out with young girls and shoots them naked for a bunch of things, like his own pervert “art” books and Vice Magazine, before it became part of MTV or FOX or whoever the fuck bought VICE from those creepy Canadians…but not nearly as creepy as Richard Kern comes across…like he comes to his own pics…because when you get young babes naked, why wouldn’t you…

The models are:

Ali Michael, Heaven Baize Garcia, L.H. Guillaud, Hannah Mensch & Jordan Robin

This is for Purple Magazine…

And for those of you who know creeper nude photographers, and I do, because I like fashionable porn better than porn, Kern is pretty much a legend…so here are those pics..

Posted in:Photos

2015

22

Jul

Charlotte McKinney’s for GQ of the DAy

No Comments »

Charlotte McKinney, or as I like to call her, one of Stephen Dorff’s hookers, because let’s face it, she looks like a Florida Hooker, who was lucky enough to have a tax evading father to send her to LA to be “Famous”..instead of working at some bootleg hooters, or as a Gogo Dancer… because she’s got big tits…

What isn’t clear is how a girl can do one photoshoot with Guess, and then end up cast on a TV show, but why bother looking into that, it’s Charlotte McKinney, just look at her tits…it’s all she’s good for…

I guess as she fades out, as the TITS of the minute….Stephen Dorff…gets to play with…I’ll leave you with a Stephen Dorff story I was told yesterday about when he was in Montreal…and he told a girl close to my heart that he will eat her ass until her legs shake….leading me to think…he probably eats McKinney’s ass till her legs shake…because eating ass is how he locks them in…I guess…

Well, here’s GQ a little slow on the draw, because they don’t realize she’s done…because it takes time to take things to print, especially when those things are being shoved down their throat by her team that created her..

Posted in:Charlotte McKinney|SFW

2015

22

Jul

Nina Dobrev in Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t know who Nina Dobrev is, but I think she’s a Canadian who is on TV, and who has had some success on TV, and figures she might as well show off to her fans, and say “fuck you normal people working in an office, you fucking suck at life and will never be as important as me”…until her show gets canceled, she spends all her money, and all she has to show for it is a child support check from a rich producer who knocked her up accidentally, as she medicates and tries to go to castings, and get work, but is too old to be noticed amongst all the other girls who want the exact same thing as her…so I guess just taking it all in and living it up is the best thing for her to do right now…live it up now, because like all girls, you’ll get old and forgotten…

HEre’s her friend being silly.

A video posted by Nina Dobrev (@ninadobrev) on Jul 21, 2015 at 11:46am PDT

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Nina Dobrev|SFW

2015

22

Jul

Rihanna in a See Through Dress of the Day

No Comments »

Yesterday, or the other day Rihanna wore a see through top…and I wrote:

My friend from Barbados who I drink with claims that she was a hooker at 14 at the karaoke bars that line the main street….but he also claims he was abducted by aliens, which is possible, because obviously aliens exist, but that is almost certifiable insane coming from him, because if aliens were going to abduct anyone, he’d probably be at the bottom of their fucking list…but I choose to believe that Rihanna used to fuck white dudes in Barbados, she wasn’t a “sensation” that needed to be scooped up from there, you know like “Let’s bring this foreign top selling artist to a bigger market”…. and I know girls from the US who have more talent than her who never had a record deal….whether they fuck the executive or producer or not…

So from teen hooker, in a small island, where everyone knows each other, to a 100,000,000 dollar a year, if not more, act…that is extremely famous…that’s just a level of crazy that can make a girl crazy…

So here she is walking around with her nipples out…because she’s liberal, free, has a hooker mentality, and has sold her soul and body to the media long ago…so keep on taking it..

I figure if all these idiots can sing the same song over and over again, I can say the same thing over and over again, it’s not like much has changed in my opinion or knowledge of Rihanna…or her tits in a see through top…it’s the same shit on a different day…which I guess is the basis of that bumper sticker..

It all makes sense now…even if Rihanna’s career doesnt..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rihanna

2015

22

Jul

Hipster Photography is Getting Weird of the Day

No Comments »

Sometimes, I look at hipster instagram photographers like Marie Tomanova , who probably doesn’t like being called an instagram photographer…..like her friend in the photos E_Lizabeth doesn’t like being called an instagram model….but to me, with technology, we’re all fucking photographers and models if we really want to be, we’ve given ourselves and our lives to technology like a bunch of idiots, so even if these girls are paid big money to do shoots for magazines, which I doubt…they’ll always be low level, like everyone else to me…

But unlike everyone else, I feel like they are trolling us, pretending to be artistic, or like this is art, even though art doesn’t exist, because I guess it gives them more purpose to what they do..and purpose, even when stupid or delusional is all that matters..

Posted in:Photos

2015

22

Jul

Monica Bellucci for GQ Italy of the Day

No Comments »

I used to get my haircut, back when I had a job, probaby 10 years ago, before I threw in the towel on a regular life, and decided to be as homeless as possible, because when I had a job, and I’d walk by homeless people, I would envy their existence, but in my filthy, perverted, ways, I couldn’t commit to living on the street, so I figured just stay with my fat wife who paid the rent on our shitty apartment, but at least I won’t be cold at night, except when she forgets to pay the electric bill, but that’s better than lviing on a bench, for a reclusive person with a blog..

That said…

My barber was this Italian, because I guess italian’s don’t find running their hands through another man’s hair gay…even though I felt being touched like that a little too romantic..for man on man action…which I guess is why I’m posting these pics of Monica Bullucci…for my Eduardo or whatever the fuck his name was…it was 10 years ago…who had pictures of her all over his shop and would talk about her to a creepy level…

Because I guess, my barber married a fat hairy Italian, probbaly one who looked a bit like me, which is why he was so gentle with his touch…

And Monica Bellucci was the beacon of hope…the reminder than not all italian women are disgusting..

Posted in:Monica Bellucci|SFW

2015

22

Jul

Aubrey Plaza in a Bikini of the DAy

No Comments »

People fucking love Aubrey Plaza…

I still don’t know who Aubrey Plaza…

But based on her bikini pics…

I don’t fucking love Aubrey Plaza…

She’s terribly fucking average looking, even boring looking, and her ass doesn’t inspire me…

I don’t care about her work, because I’ve seen none of it…her comedy because I’ve seen none of it, or really anything about her…because I’ve seen none of it….

Allowing me to be absolutely objective, the way I am supposed to be, in my analysis of her boring bikini ass..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Aubrey Plaza|SFW

2015

22

Jul

Kim Kardashian for Vogue Spain of the Day

No Comments »

Here’s some Kim Kardashian in Vogue Spain, because like Rolling Stone, and so many magazines before them, they figure, the world is obsessed with this whore family, let’s all milk them like the cows that they are, even though we all collectively agree that we want them to disappear…and die off…rich kid groupies with sex tapes shouldn’t be this “important”…

That said, the marketing hook on this one is that she’s got no make-up on, something that I don’t believe, because she’s put on so much make-up over the years, that she’s always got make-up on, not to mention all the plastic surgery and fillers and other bullshit like her Kanye cum soaked face…and retouching…there’s absolutely no such thing as a Kardashian that is “natural”….or “pure”…

These are the garbage hookers of our generation…and they need to be killed off…

Nice diaper trick..

Posted in:Kim Kardashian|SFW