DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

29

Jul

Dylan Penn for Some Catalog of the Day

Dylan Penn is average at best…you know if you were to find her standing randomly on the street somewhere…

But when you factor in that her dad is Sean Penn and her mom Robin Wright….all of a sudden that is what takes over…and average looking turns into modeling contract, and modeling contract turns into campaigns, because idiots like me, think people care about celebrity kids, their spoiled brat, raised by monster self involved rich cunts because people do care…people have nothing better to do that obsess over these idiots who have become the icons, or cool kids of our generation, when they are really just rich, scam artist garbage…

Either way, here’s the campaign..if you’re into that shit, and you are, because she’s the in to that world…and didn’t have to suck dick to get there…which I guess is boring…but can balance out when you think of all the dick she probably has sucked thanks to being a fucked up rich kid in a fucked up rich world…

Posted in:Dylan Penn|SFW

2015

29

Jul

Chrissy Teigen is a Pig in Women’s Health UK of the Day

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This bitch does anything for attention…she’s the fucking worst…pile of useless, uninteresting, unaccomplished, wallet fucking garbage out there…

I don’t hate Chrissy Teigen, she’s loyal to her employer John LEgend, she sits around like a medicated rich wife, and posts shit on twitter while doing it, she’s overly sensitive because she know she’s just a sugar baby, who hasn’t really accomplished much at all, but she’s figured out if she gets naked, people will celebrate her big ethnic ambiguous “bikini model” who probably makes 100 dollars a year, tits….it distracts from her old, botox, filled, pug-like face…

I don’t know why she’s still at this, instead of just getting pregnant and completing the sugar baby cycle…so that when the divorce happens, she gets child support money…but before that, let’s do some shoots that don’t matter, that no one cares about, because this whole world is oversaturated with naked pics, and the world doesn’t fucking even notice….

Posted in:Chrissy Teigen

2015

29

Jul

Beyonce’s Big Cleavage Tumblr Hipster of the Day

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Beyonce isn’t hot…

Beyonce thinks she’s the hottest fucking shit…and she’s producing pics like she’s a hipster chick, when she’s actually a 30 something year old mom who doesn’t understand that she’s a 30 something year old mom…

This is what happens when people make too much money, and spend their entire lives being sucked up to by a crew…

This is also what happens when your husband is surrounded by groupie pussy, and makes millions a year of Bajan pussy, who can pull the sex thing, because she’s broken and from an island and it makes sense…she’s sucked some dick to this…While Beyonce was in Fucking Destiny’s child..But she does have tits, and makes fun Miley Gifs…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Beyonce|SFW

2015

29

Jul

Olivia Culpo for TREATS! of the Day

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Olivia Culpo was Miss USA, and Nick Jonas’ girlfriend…and I guess now naked in a magaizne…that is hardly a but rather an excuse to get girls naked….thirsty fucking girls…who want to look and feel beautiful…like a wife on her 30th wedding anniversary in the mall photo studio trying to be sex for her husband..only this is to lure rich husbands, as the magazine is produced by rich dudes…and the girls are in LA, from LA and want as much as attention as possible to get noticed amongst all the hot fucking chicks..

Here are the pics…of her getting her ass sniffed by a dude…looking like some cheesy fucking catalog shoot…but it’s “high end” to LA people…while the rest of the world doesn’t give a fuck…

Posted in:Olivia Culpo

2015

29

Jul

Dita Von Teese is Still At It…of the Day

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Dita Von Teese is a case study for girls doing internet porn…you can do it….

She was some garbage lesbian pornstar who wasn’t even cute….but for some reason understood a few important things…

The first is technology…or the internet when it was dial-up, rocking your own fan-site or members site to get an audience…and the second is Pin Up, people, especially fat chicks, fucking love Pin Up and the “Glamour” aspect of it…

Pin Up, a place for fat chicks everywhere to try to look sexy…and Dita..managed to turn her concept shoots people were paying for to an empire, endorsing brands and make-up companies, making millions a year…

Not because she’s the hottest or best, but because she was first…to the game…

ANd now, she’s jerking off champagne bottles…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Dita Von Teese

2015

29

Jul

Rita Ora’s Men’s Shirt Porn of the Day

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Rita Ora wore a men’s shirt and fuck me boots while leaving a hotel or brothel or whatever this is…

Mens Shirts with party footwear, like heels or fuck me boots are the number one walk of shame solution for girls who don’t like walking around in last night’s party dress because it is covered in cum and vomit…and stale beer…

If this was a girl, who I worked with, not that I work with people, but you know what I mean, my neighbor or the coffee shop employee or really anyone…I’d be all about this..

Since it is Rita Ora who only exists because she’s a whore, it’s not all that interesting..but in her defense, none of these idiots are…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2015

29

Jul

Anais Pouliot for Some Magazine of the Day

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I have spoke about this ANAIS POULIOT before….she is some French Canadian I’ve never met, but should have met, but probably is best I didn’t meet, because French Canadian girls are the fucking worst level 9 crazy there is, and those are the ones stripping and thinking they are the shit, not the ghetto bitches who ended up being huge models..that aren’t that huge but huge enough to be living in NYC doing NYC things..

All this to say, french girls have anal on the first date that doesn’t even need to be a date…

She’s not as naked as she normally is, I guess she’s going legit..and mainstream…

Posted in:Anais Pouliot|SFW

2015

29

Jul

Lily Donaldson for The Telegraph Bikini Shoot of the Day

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Lily Donaldson is going through a mid life crisis…at least that is what I assume is going on with this 30 year old model who didn’t maximize her career when she was at her peak, she took it for granted, and I guess things are just slowing down for her and it’s time to call on her friends to get her press…

Because Lily Donaldson, a British model who was a Victoria’s Secret contract worker that they pushed under the rug and forgot about in 2012, as they do…because these girls are replaceable, especailly the uneventful ones….

Maybe she’s just looking for a rich husband, and the 2012 VS girl isn’t good enough for the billionaires, they want to marry something current..

Either way, she’s in a standardized bikini shoot, that bores me, but that is a half naked model for you…because I prefer girls naked, on my floor, doing iphone shoots….

Posted in:Lily Donaldson|SFW

2015

29

Jul

Photographer Arnaud Lajeunie for Odiseo No. 6 of the Day

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Arnaud Lajeunie is a photographer…but then again, who isn’t a photographer, cameras are so affordable, and we have them in all of our phones…it’s like does the world actually need a photographer…is calling yourself a photographer anything but laughable…it’s one of those obsolete talents…technology destroyed…

Maybe we should start calling photographers “Technicians”…who just put a button…because under the current situation, I’m a fucking photographer, just based on my instagram pics of my dog…I am also a director, producer and writer….

When anyone who knows me, knows that I am a fucking hack..

That said, thie Arnaud Lajeunie dude is my jam, he takes average, even ugly girls, Amanda Smith, Celine Bjornlund Mortier, & Agathe Rousselle, gets them naked, in masks, being weird, under red lights, because #art..

And I get to see their pubic hair, and I fucking love pubic hair..