I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2010

17

Mar

Audrina Patridge’s Legs Look Better Photoshopped of the Day

Audrina was in a Bikini for FHM and I went off about how this was her calling. She had the fake tits, she wasn’t at and all she needed was a little fucking photoshop to clean her up a little so that she doesn’t look like the retarded pig she looks like on TV, Video or pictures. It just takes a little smoke and mirrors that make someone so irritating and average looking finally worth jerking off to…but instead she didn’t lock herself away until the next photoshoot, she’s decided to walk around in a pair of little shorts, I guess in efforts to remind us that she isn’t a bikini model and she’s not all that and actually has short shitty legs and a long torso, not to sound too picky, I just can’t seem to see past girls who look retarded shit and in my defense, no one calls you too picky when you notice the amputee is a fucking amputee even though you still tried to bring home because she was easy….you see cuz I notice the shit doesn’t mean I wouldn’t try to get the shit pregnant….if you know what I mean…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Legs|Shirts

2010

17

Mar

Amazing Teen Prostitution Story of the Day

Here’s a pretty fucking weird story straight from the fucking gutter. It’s got something to do with some dude who took in a teenage runaway in exchange for sexual favors who he dressed like a girl and sent to the streets when the teenager refused to turn more tricks for for free…and the whole thing is next level. I’m thinking about getting the picture of the uncle put on a T-shirt because he’s inspired me and given me some serious good times and I’ve never even met the guy, I’ve just seen this video…It is confusing but it is also that good. I want to buy the rights to this story for a couple of 40s of malt liquor. It is gonna be the sequel to Precious…just wait and see….only problem is if I write the script they’ll call me racist but if I was black, they’d call me a social commentary or my people cuz the Oscars are fucking racist.

Posted in:Teen Prostitutes|Tranny

2010

17

Mar

Andy Richter Gets Groupie Ass of the Day

It turns out that when you are Andy Richter, ice cream eating moms with hot asses in yoga pants stop to say hi, even though you are a worthless irrelevant, fat fuck, who killed the Conan show because you’re Conan’s friend Conan felt sorry for and decided to give a second chance to, despite the original Conan sucking with Andy Richter and Conan really only seeing any success without Andy Richter, when Andy Richter was cocky and thought he didn’t need Conan anymore so moved onto being on sitcoms no one watched and eventually retiring, until Conan made the stupid decision to give him work on his new show, only to alienate Conan’s audience and making the shit fail, while making Conan a ton of money, but probably making him feel rejected, like when you bang a hot girl when she’s drunk and she never calls you back, but instead mails you 500 dollars to never tell a soul, knowing it happened is good, but knowing she pretends it didn’t and is willing to pay for the mistake to disappear kinda hurts….Not that I care – I think all these assholes make too much money for what they offer society, get too much pussy and don’t do enough to society to deserve it. It’s like they are pulling some insane scam we should all get in on but they won’t let us in cuz they don’t want the world to know how easy what they do is, so they keep the circle tightly closed….motherfuckers….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Andy Richter|Ass|Yoga Pants

2010

17

Mar

Oliva Munn Exploits Virgin, Gamer, Geek Losers of the Day

I don’t like Olivia Munn at all. I don’t think she’s hot. In fact, I know she’s not hot, but for some reason she’s got a small fanbase and that reason is her serious aggressive hustle. Bitch tries so fucking hard to get noticed, constantly trying to get featured in magazines and shit and it all started one day when she realized that virgin loser gamer geeks who can’t get pussy are pretty fucking loyal to Star Wars and other Geek shit, that means they’ll be loyal to a girl they think they can relate to. So she moved in on a fucking internet generation of people who can’t get laid and became the half naked, fun, cool in the eyes of virgin losers character and the whole thing is exploitative….

Today she posted this picture with this statement on twitter:

Shooting Comicon skit this week… Why the hell does my costume have to be so tiny?!!

Shit is like moving in on North America and telling the natives to take this bottle of whiskey and gasoline to huff in exchange for their land. Or like Europeans showing up on a beach in Africa and asking all the tribes people to get on a fucking boat at gunpoint to become workers in fields and shit. It’s like recruiting Asian immigrants and their dynamite skills to blow the fuck up when building the railroad…It’s like paying Mexicans 2 dollars a day to clean up after your bratty fucking kids…

Virgin loser Geeks who are into comics, anime, computer games and other boring shit can’t control themselves when they see this shit and I think it needs to be stopped. They are going to give them a sensory overload and their brains are going to blow the fuck up, especially since they all they they have a chance with her if they don’t already think they are dating her because being accessible to losers is the only way an ugly chick can be confused for a hot chick….This will make them run out and rape the girl with Downs Syndrome down the street or someshit…

So I am starting an End Oliva Munn campaign that I will probably forget about in a few hours because I tend to never think of this twat. Targeting virgin loser guys to be your fans, is like me targeting homeless teen runaways and offering them soup. It’s too fucking easy.

Posted in:Geek|Olivia Munn

2010

16

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

The highlight of my day wasn’t when I asked Ken Paves, the gay guy who force feeds Jessica Simpson into fatness because no gay guys like to be the second in line if they don’t have to and all gay guys are strategic in their quest to the top, by attaching themselves to famous pussy as their “best friend” while loving every second on TV or in the gossip pages or whatever else he jerks off to, whether he fucked the Thai Lady Boys or they Fucked Him, that lead to him sending me a private message that I thought was pretty fucking erotic….maybe even flirting and playing hard to get…..homo.

The highlight of my day was getting a mom of two to offer me 3 solo sex videos for 50 dollars, I just don’t have the 50 dollars, but the potential gives me something to work for….

Not that you care about my pathetic internet life….here are my stepLINKS…

Heidi Montag Stupid Tits Whoring Some Bullshit Product
GO GO

15 Of The Worst Scifi Movies Ever (That You’ve Actually Heard Of)
GO

The 50 Sexiest Redheads of All Time
GO

Because It’s Like a Money Tree, But With Pussy
GO

Marta Works the Beach – VIDEO
GO

The 20 Worst TV News Fails – VIDEOS
GO

ROSARIO DAWSON DOWN BLOUSE
GO

Top 5 Lady Gaga “Telephone” Parodies Because I Hate HEr – VIDEOS
GO

I Don’t Care If She Has an Army of Children, I Still Wanna BAng Angelina Jolie
GO

Looks Like Your Paula Abdul Fantasy’s Wil Be Back for Another Round
GO

Lesbian Titty Suck
GO

Kate Gosselin’s Vagina is An old Atari System, Whereas Marisa Miller’s is Like a 250GB PS3 Made of Platinum.
GO

The 60 Hottest Women In Sports Movie Histor
GO

Zuzana is Oh So Sexy
GO

Check Out These Asses…
GO

Mischa Barton: Almost An Upskirt
GO

Oooookay, Mike Tyson Has Officially Lost His Fucking Mind
GO

Crystal Wants to Get Penetrated
GO

A Little Vintage Jessica Alba
GO

Kate Bosworth is Lookin’ Good in Short Shorts
GO

Man, Everytime I Think I’m a Horrible Parent, Some Fucking IDIOT Tops Me
GO

Some Cheryl Burke Bikini’s
GO

Hayley and a Dilson
GO

It’s a Loveable Bra – VIDEO
GO

Gwen Stefani is Lookin’ Good
GO

Ring Girl Passes Out – VIDEO
GO

Striptease of the Day – VIDEO
GO

Paris Hilton Topless Anyone?
GO

Tory is On the Rocks
GO

Petra is in Playboy
GO

It’s Amazing How Terry Richardson Can Actually DO the Things I TALK About Doing and Not Only Get Away With It, But Get Fucking Rich At the Same Time…He’s Still a Hack…
GO

Follow Me, Im Begging You
FACEBOOK and TWITTER

Posted in:stepLINKS

2010

16

Mar

Bonus Wife Swap Video of the Day

This is seriously worth watching…there’s not much more to say about it because I don’t feel like being on the computer – just watch it motherfuckers….Life changing.

Posted in:Wife Swap

2010

16

Mar

Rosie Huntington-Whitely Topless Picture of the Day

Here’s one of the newest models to sell her soul to Victoria Secret because that stamp of approval is serious and means she’s got it going on in a big fucking way. She’ only 23 and she doesn’t mind getting topless making her pretty much my kind of girl. Not to mention I’ve been following everything she’s worn this month in this What She is Wearing feature on Vogue, cuz I’m creepy but not quite as creepy as the guy who came up with this concept….

Posted in:Model|Rosie Huntington-Whitely|Topless

2010

16

Mar

Mischa Barton Still isn’t Dead of the Day

I guess it’s only fitting that a dying Mischa Barton would be at a make a wish foundation and not because kids are wishing to see her but because she’s wishing to get relevant work before she dies of a drug overdose or whatever the fuck it is she’s into that makes her look like serious fucking shit….and here are the pictures because I guess we should all take her in before she Corey Haims / Brittany Murpheys herself cuz sometimes celebrity life just gets you self destructive….

On a side note, I figure it’s worth mentioning that her ex-boyfriend seems to be doing fine without her – even though the fact he gets any pussy always amazes me – because here he is with his groupie pussy and her hot cleavage – I guess that’s what happens when you make teenage girl accessible music with the whitest most non-threatening suburban black guy around….and in all honesty Cisco Adler doesn’t irritate me at all – even though most people do….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Cisco Adler|Mischa Barton

2010

16

Mar

Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Getting Fat Again of the Day

Jennifer Love Hewitt is playing with fire. She recently broke up with Jamie Kennedy Experiment and now she’s out getting fried chicken or whatever kind of chicken this chicken place serves cuz I know isn’t skinless chicken in a low fat salad chicken…She came so far in her happiness with Jamie Kennedy Experiment…he put her to work because I guess he was a fan and she shed the pounds and started looking more like her small-headed busty on a skinny frame self, but now they’ve split and she’s hit the fast food to eat her emotions…and shit’s a real tragedy. I really thought she had another run in her, another chance to get jerked off too, but I guess people are just gonna have to stick with the blue tank top in Can’t Hardly Wait, since it’s done.

On a sidenote, Jamie Kennedy was in Montreal for the comedy festival a few years ago and I know at least 4 girls who were his groupie and hooked up with him and I couldn’t really understand why, dude’s so second rate, but it turns out if a motherfucker is on TV that’s all it takes to get pussy…so if you’re smart, you’ll start going to auditions for TV commercials looking for useless, fat, virgins who smell like cum, cuz even that will be enough to get a girl wet, she just has to notice you. Remember that and remember I always give the good advice….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Emotional Eating|Jennifer Love Hewitt

2010

16

Mar

Amazing Fat Chick Story of the Day

Here’s a 550 pound woman getting paid to hit 1000 pounds. She’s some idiot who thinks there are no health risks to being a fucking pig of a woman but more importantly, she’s pretty much an internet pornstar who takes pictures of herself in her panties and people pay to see the shit. Now she’s addicted to the fame like she was Lindsay Lohan and now she’s trying to get more attention and her fans are sending her food to make her fucking fatter.

I am married to a fat chick, it’s a disgusting fucking thing that I write about daily, so I will never understand the fetish, but can only assume her fans are black dudes….

Posted in:Fat Chick