I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

26

May

Some Exclusive Rihanna Pics a Week Late of the Day

I have been in situations where I’ve been sitting in the park and some young student in summer school comes out to tan in her bikini while reading her text book. I have seen her breast fall out of her bikini top like she was at the fuckin’ beach and not at a fuckin’ public park in the middle of the day and I wanted so bad to take a fuckin’ picture, but was too scared of getting busted. The other day I saw a bitch balancing a book on her head while walking in some kind of posture testing stunt or something, but I was too scared to take a picture and getting busted. I’ve seen couples fucking, from their fire escape windows and I’ve been too scared to take pictures, I guess what I am trying to say is that I fucking suck at documenting my life, even the hotter situations I’d like to reference at a later date for masturbation purposes, because I am a fuckin’ pussy.

But this person who was tanning behind Rihanna at some resort in Hawaii wasn’t a pussy, he say Rihanna and took a fuckin’ picture like a real fuckin’ man, where as all I woulda done is tried to rape her with my buddies, not a hateful rape, a sensual rape just to show her how much I fuckin’ love her while my friends restrain her, not because I believe in rape, but because I believe in tough love and it’s fuckin’ obvious she wouldn’t let me up in that willingly.

These are from a week ago, you’ve probably seen them, but I am posting them anyway.


To see the rest of the pictures – Follow this Link
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Posted in:Bikini|Exclusive|Rihanna

2009

26

May

Katy Perry Does Complex Magazine, Unfortunately of the Day

I think I have a keen eye to spot the imperfections in people. It’s kind of a curse because it makes appreciating a girl talking to me next to impossible, which is okay because girls generally don’t talk to me.

So unlike other men who see a half naked busty chick in lingerie doing a photoshoot, I see a busted faced, sloppy bodied, pig with a dumpy ass and double chin, who despite having been made up for hours upon hours before the shoot, looks like fucking shit.

I’d like to give Marc Ecko some shit for giving this whore a fuckin’ cover with his magazine, but then I remembered they are targeting white suburban kids by pretending they target black dudes, when we all know that black dudes are too busy being hood, rapping and gangbangin’ to care about buying magazines, but no matter how busy they are, they will always fuck white chicks, even if they look like Katy fuckin’ Perry and to back-up my theory, her on and off boyfriend is a black rapper, cuz all it takes for a black dude is white skin.

Check out the Photoshopped Katy Perry Gallery – Of Her in Her Lingerie – Because You Have No Fucking Standards and Just Need Tits

Posted in:Complex|Katy Perry

2009

25

May

stepLINKS of the Day

People ask me why I never started a news site. They ask why I write about myself and not about what celebrities are doing. I guess the answer comes in two parts. The first is that I don’t give a fuck about celebrities, but I do give a fuck about shit I see and do and experience and like to document it, because I drink too much and forget things after they happen. Second, I hate uneducated idiots who start up these sites and report the news that they didn’t create, make or break, and add their idiotic commentary to it, like they expect us to fuckin’ care. Not that it matters.

What does matter is that I just cast myself in the next season of The Hills as Heidi and Spencer’s murderer. I don’t get paid for the part, but I am pretty sure it’ll be fuckin’ rewarding, maybe even my life work.

That said, I hope you remembered your troops, or the poor hacks that got suckered in and died for an oppressive government who masked what they did as fighting for freedom when they already had real freedom back at home playing with their dogs, fuckin’ their wives, buyin’ their kids birthday gifts, fixing up an old boat or car, spending the afternoon with thir dad’s, watching superbowl with their friends and living a fuckin’ life that didn’t involve getting blown up in the fuckin’ dessert, while the top level government are flying around on private jets sipping champagne at your fuckin’ expense and I can only blame Heidi Montags.

While you were remembering that, I remembered my stepLINKS.

I Would Totally Stick My Falcid Peen in Miley Cyrus’s Whore Mother Just to See Fragments of the Shit the Made Miley Dried Up and Flaking Off My Shit….
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Here’s a Little Miley Vagina Peaking Out of Her Shorts to Show You How Fucked Up A Uterus Can Be
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Anya is About to Give ScarJo a Run For Her Money
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Alicia Keys Hottest Pics
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Okay These Infomercial Products Are Just Getting More and More Retarded
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Personally I’d Rather Work Out and Get a Giant Penis
But Let’s Laugh At These Self Absorbed Workout Assholes Anyways
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Evening Dress Thong Show
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I Still Wanna Bang Angelina Jolie
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Alessandra Ambrosio is Flawless
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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And The Shit From Japan Just Keeps Getting Weirder
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And While I’m At It, Probably Throw It In Camila Alves
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Go On Easy, Easy Rider!
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Fun With Music Videos
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Who the Fuck is January Jones and Why Isn’t My Penis In Her?
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Lookin Good Sweetheart – Audio Edition
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Kate Hudson Looks Kind of Disgusting with Dark Hair
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I’d Lke to Fuck MAry Kate Olsen in that Hate Fuck Kind of Way
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The Critics Are Stomping All Over Heath Ledgers Grave
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Striptease of the Day
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Just Say NO to Online Dating!!
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Man, Kevin Bacon is Having a Bad Few Months
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Simi’s Got Some Sweet Tits
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Spoiled Teen Crys Rape – VIDEO
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Because Weekend’s Aren’t Always What They Are Cracked Up To Be
Sometimes You Gotta Start the Week Off Right
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What Do You Think os Megan Jones’ Hairy Pussy?
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Shower of Puke – VIDEO
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Just You’re Every Day Typical Naked Girl Next Door
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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What Can I Say? Jean Claude Van Damme Has Still Got It
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Enjoy All You Can of Gisele – Heard She May Have Ruined Her Vagina With a Baby
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Rebecca Romijn is Topless
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Vickie is a Lady in REd
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And That’s What Friends Are For
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My Penis Just Went From 6 to 12 Thanks to Jessica Szohr
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Ariel in Blue
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I Would Kill Myself Too if I Was Second Rate to Kristen Dunst
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Keyboard Cat: True Hollywood Story
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Lookin Good Sweetheart
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Clay Aiken Has No Balls
I Know, I’m No Surprised Either
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The 24 Types of Pot Smokers
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Girl Masterbates – Nuff Said
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Can You Guess What the Backwards Song Is Before The End Of the Video
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

25

May

Pam Anderson and her Pink Bikini Remember of the Day

If you’re wondering why Pam Anderson is wearing a pink bikini on memorial day, it is in memory of her pink vagina, that has over the years got greyer, thicker skinned, callused and diseased.

You know, remembering a time she was more desirable, a sex symbol and a woman other women aspired to be like because they knew their boyfriends and husbands were jerking off to her. Someone who helped build the fuckin’ breast implant industry.

Something I think deserves a fuckin’ parade and day off for.

Here are the pics.

Posted in:Bikini|Pamela Anderson

2009

25

May

Heidi Klum for McDonald’s of the Day

I was walking by a McDonald’s earlier today and saw the skinniest girl I have probably ever seen walking towards the door. I was thinking to myself that to have a body like that, there is no way a motherfucker eats that shit, but I was wrong, she walked right in. Maybe she was a heroin addict or bulemic and I was dealing with her on a binge, but I think she was just a skinny girl who got down with disgusting food every now and then, so I asked her to let me take a picture of her, so that I’d post it on the site and maybe get her a job as their new spokesperson, because McDonald’s needs someone who isn’t fat and dying of liver failure from eating the shitty processed food, you know a poster girl who doesn’t need poster sized paper to print up pictures of themselves because normal cameras can’t take it all fuckin’ in, especially since bitch was worth a fuckin’ round, but then she just told me to fuck myself and I guess you can’t really help someone who doesn’t want to be helped, or maybe I just shouldn’t have bothered a binging girl, eating away her sadness despite her eating disorder at her darkest time.

So when I saw these pics of Klum promoting some McDonald’s shit, I got excited because I knew my vision was on the right fuckin’ track and that it must have been a sign from fuckin’ God telling me I’m a fuckin’ genius, but I doubt it.

Posted in:Heidi Klum|McDonalds

2009

25

May

The Kardashian’s in Some Scripted Miami Bullshit of the Day

Here are the Kardashian sisters bullshitting the world in Miami while filming their bullshit show. I am not sure what went on in their mother’s womb when that bitch Khloe was developing but I assume it involves living next to powerlines, or even steroid treatement for asthma or something that seeped into her placenta. What I am sure of is that this bitch is a fuckin’ monster and the fact that dudes fuck her confuses me, but not as much as it probably confuses them, you know with trying to hide their tranny porn obsession from their family and friends and shit, cuz only getting off to tits if there is a dick attached is nothin’ but confusing, hell that shit isn’t even made in fuckin’ nature, it’s some futuristic sci-fi shit and I’m sure you know all about that.

Posted in:Fake Reality TV|Kardashians|Miami

2009

25

May

The Reason You Should Be a Successful Film Producer of the Day

If you ever had doubts about you capabilities of getting a woman. You know because you have a small dick, or because to date no girls have really given you much attention, you need to brush your loser shoulders off and figure out a way to make money. I’m not telling you anything you didn’t already know, but pussy likes cash, they claim it is instinctive because of some survival about bringing a baby into the world, but I think it’s got more to do with hot bitches being lazy and used to getting everything they want and unfortunately the things they want cost money, because they feel like they are celebrities or at least deserve a celebrity lifestyle, so that’s why this big studio exec, and I mean big in his jean size, who’s made his fortune off making a ton of huge movies, has a bitch who is substantially better lookin than his fat, bald, jewish ass, I mean sure she may be with him for his great sense of humor, but I’m going with that she isn’t.

So get off the computer and figure out your hustle, while I stay on the computer, cuz I don’t need a fuckin’ hustle, I’m comfortable in my serious unhappiness and very lazy, unless it comes down to showing the kid in the wheelchair how good my quick my tap dancing feet are to make me feel better about myself…..

Posted in:Bikini|Georgina Chapman|Harvey Weinstein

2009

23

May

stepLINKS of the Day

It’s the long weekend. That means the only people who will read this are lonely losers with no family, friends or money to get the fuck aways from their computer for the weekend. Welcome to my life.

The good news is that in efforts to get wasted last night, I fell asleep at 9 pm and only woke up an hour ago. Thank you Oxy, or whatever the fuck that pill the sketchy skinny convulsing dude gave me was, you and pussy are by far my favorite addictions.

I don’t think I am hungover anymore, but I do think that these are my stepLINKS.

Lookin Good Sweetheart The Hayden Panettiere Vagina Edition
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Because There Is No Fucking Way You’ll Meet a Real Girl Tonight
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Fuck World History, check Out the HISTORY OF WEEEEEEED!!!
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Get YOUR Swine Flu Shot
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Liz Hurley is All Her MILF Glory
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What the Fuck is Paris Hilton Doing in Cannes?
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Can You Say Death Wish?
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The Celebrity Gender Switch Experiment
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Mariah Carey is See Through!
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Ready For a Dirty Joke?
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When Will Ferrel Interviews Dustin Hoffman…
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Striptease of the Day
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Well, I Just Threw Up in My Mouth a Little
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what the Fuck of the Day
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Dita Von Tease Dresses Like a Dirty Whore in Cannes Cause She’s a Class Act
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I Kind of Have a Thing For Zhang Ziyi
You Know, The Hot Bitch From Crouching Tiger/Hidden Dragon
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Taylor Momsen is a Hot Mess
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Mischa Barton is On Meth or Something
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Quentin Tarantino Drugged Brad Pitt
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Christina Julie is Totally Nude
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The Ass That Broke The Window
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Amy Winehouse is Still a Fucking Mess
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Hannah Hilton Does What She Does Best
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Eliza Dushku Does Maxim Magazine
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AHHHHHH Dani Woodword
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart Part 2
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India Reynolds Is Naked
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Slut Gets Naked In Nature
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Jon’s Wifes is a Fucking Cunt and I’m Glad He Hates Her As Much As I Do
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Sit Back, Relax, And Enjoy The Show
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Pheobe Price is Disgusting and I Wish She Was Dead
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Watch is There Darlings, Looks Like You Lost Something
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56 Insanely Hot Indy Car Grid Girls
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Mommy Wants to Play Too
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Notorious B.R.A.D.Y
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Hot Chicks Get Naked and Rub Themselves Down. God Bless Spring Break
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Retard Tits Anyone?
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I Spy With My Little Eye, Paris Hilton Doing Something Illegal
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Cookie Monster Metal!!
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Cleveland is the Worst Place to Visit Ever
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Site of the Day – MSPAINTPORN.NET

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

22

May

Hayden Panettiere is Still on Vacation of the Day

Hayden Panettiere is still on vacation, or maybe this is working, considering celebrities live the laziest fucking life, unlike me, who is up all day sitting on my couch, taking beer bottles back to buy more beer, or maybe even a can of beefaroni, because like a celebrity I need a personal chef, unfortunately my chef is named Chef Boyardee and he makes his mass produced shit with the most ghetto ingredients to make it affordable, I suck at life and here’s Hayden ownin’ hers in a white bikini, which coincidentally is my favorite color bikini because I am ususally able to spot pussy and I am sure I’ve said this before, but I am a fan of pussy.

Posted in:Bikini|Hayden Panettiere|Vacation

2009

22

May

Blake Lively in her Romper of the Day

Blake Lively was out in a romper last night, which is a coincidence because so was the girl I followed home to jerk off on her fire escape watching her make dinner.

Posted in:Blake Lively|Romper