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Sara Sampaio Shows Off her Pussy in Tight Pants Under the Guise that it is a Fitness Video of the Day
Sara Sampaio Shows Off her Pussy in Tight Pants Under the Guise that it is a Fitness Video of the Day
Industry Flesh Puppet Jessica Alba Propagandizes for the Machine of the Day
Industry Flesh Puppet Jessica Alba Propagandizes for the Machine of the Day
Sydney Sweeney is Glamour’s Woman of the Year of the Day
Sydney Sweeney is Glamour’s Woman of the Year of the Day
Paige Spiranac Feeling Herself Up of the Day
Paige Spiranac Feeling Herself Up of the Day
Margaret Qualley is Hot for an Ugly Chick of the Day
Margaret Qualley is Hot for an Ugly Chick of the Day

2008

04

Sep

Christina Aguilera’s Got Some Leggings and a See Through Shirt On of the Day

9 Comments »

Christina Aguilera is the kind of wife who you walk in on taking a pregnancy test, even though you haven’t fucked her the last 4 months because she can’t stomach your big monkey face and uses her pregnancy as a solid excuse that you believe and it’s okay because your big monkey face has been too busy trying to make money to keep her around a little longer because you know she is out of your league and you have a deep rooted fear that one day she will wake up the fuck up and ask herself what the hell she’s doing with a big monkey faced motherfucker like yourself and not having money will probably make that happen sooner than later, because money seems to be a pretty solid blinder.

So when you ask her why the fuck she’s taking a pregnancy test after not having sex with you for 4 months and she comes up with some silly excuse about how she masturbated wearing your her underwear that you’ve been jerking off on the last 4 months because you like lacey things since they are pretty and smell like this popstar’s cunt, but part of you just has trouble believing her because along with the rest of the world, you know she’s a slut.

Either way, here she is in a see through top and leggings, rockin’ her fake tits, fake hair, made up face and husband that’s gotta be fake, because I just can’t believe this union is real.

Posted in:Bra|Christina Aguilera|See Through|Tits

2008

04

Sep

Abi Harding is Someone You Don’t Know in a Bikini of the Day

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I was just in a coffee shop getting a coffee because I am lazy and sitting behind a table was a girl with a low cut shirt and amazing fucking posture. Her tits were just poppin out perfectly because her shoulders were pushed back so hard it was unnatural and reminded me of a teenage girl trying to pretend she actually has tits by stickin’ out her chest like a chicken about to lay an egg or some shit. The truth is it was impressive to me because I live with a dumpy sack of shit of a wife who can’t sit up straight no matter how hard she tries because she doesn’t have the strength to hold herself up and push her shoulders back, but in her defense either does any living man because she’s just that sloppy, but it’s still really unattractive and lazy lookin.

So I decide to tell this girl how impressed I am that her back is straighter than Justin Timberlake pretends he is and I say something along the lines that it looks like she’s got a steel fucking rod for a back and that is some serious talent and go on with my coffee drinking at the table facing her. About 5 minutes later, she packs up her back and rolls the fuck away in a wheel chair that I didn’t know she was in and I felt like a bit of a fuckin’ asshole because she probably did have a steel rod in her back from some injury that left her paralyzed from the waist down and despite not being able to jog, feel sex or walk up a flight of stairs, that girl could sit up straight and sitting up straight does things to tits that may make a gay man wish he was straight.

These pictures on the otherhand, may make a straight man wish he was gay, because they aren’t hot and are of Abi Harding, who is in some UK Indie Band that I’ve never heard of. She plays the saxophone because she has an oral fixation and here she is in a bikini showing off some small tits and a disgusting stomach scar and I’d say that all bitch needs to do is kick her shoulders back a bit to make it look like she has tits, or that she could use a good back injury to force her to sit up straight but it turns out that the scar is from a car accident where she coincidentally broke her spine but managed to walk again and that throws my back injury theory out the window. Thanks Abi Harding for making me look bad in front of my friends. Bitch!

Posted in:Abi Harding|Bikini

2008

04

Sep

Selma Blair Rocks a Bikini of the Day

14 Comments »

I went to get a sandwich at my regular sandwich place because shit’s cheap. I am not sure the quality of the 3 dollar sandwich but I still haven’t died yet so I keep going back. One of the girls who works there is disgusting lookin’ and I hate when she gets down to making my lunch. She’s the kind of girl who looks worse than my wife, is greasy, unshowered and never uses gloves when working. I usually try to ignore the shit and eat the sandwich regardless, but today she walked out of the employee bathroom, told the boss she just used the last of the toilet paper and they need more. She walked up to the counter as I was screaming “please serve someone else first, don’t do this to me, please no” in my head and that’s when bitch started up on my order. Her bare fresh from the bathroom hands all over the little food I could afford. I paid, walked out and contemplated throwing it out, but realized it was probably my one meal of the day and people have probably eaten worse, so I ate it and with every bite gagged a bit as I fought to swallow it down. I just hope she wasn’t in there taking a shit before making my lunch, because I deal with piss a hell of a lot better than I do with shit, but it was still fuckin’ disgusting and reminded me of a time some obese dude got a nosebleed while making my Subway and didn’t offer to give me a new sandwich as his blood covered hand made my food, only this time I didn’t throw shit out the second I walked out the door.

Speaking of disgusting here are some pics of Selma Blair in a Bikini.It’s not so bad, considering she’s almost 40, but it is definitely not very good. Enjoy…

Posted in:Bikini|Selma Blair

2008

04

Sep

Sharon Stone’s Hard Mom Nipples of the Day

6 Comments »

* Access to material has been disabled in compliance with DMCA *

I used to own a piece of shit car. This was a few years ago when I needed it to get to work because I am too luxurious for public transport, despite being poor as shit. I just couldn’t handle being next to smelly immigrants who would rub up against me, or the 9-5 slaves that looked pale and exhausted in their boring fuckin’ lives. Shit would make my hangover induced anxiety ten times worse than just driving. Everyday, I’d wake up and go out to my piece of shit car and there would be a flyer on it saying “we buy scrap cars for scrap metal for 300 dollars or less”. Now I paid at least 2500 dollars of my wife’s money for the shit box that year and wasn’t about to give it up for a couple hundred buck, but I didn’t know whether I should take the eager scrap metal guy’s request as a compliment like my car is a hot piece of shit, or as an insult like my car was a piece of shit that deserved to be trashed, but I do know it’s probably the same feeling that Sharon Stone gets every time she leaves her house because despite being an old piece of garbage of a woman, someone out there’s probably willing to fuck her for a couple hundred dollars….

* Access to material has been disabled in compliance with DMCA *

Posted in:Hard|Nipples|Sharon Stone

2008

04

Sep

Miley Cyrus’ Mother’s Ass of the Day

14 Comments »

If you’re wondering where Miley learned all about boys and how to sleep your way to the top and suck dick proper, you’re lookin’ at her ass. I am not entirely sure if this is Miley’s hot mom who only married Miley’s father because she was a small town girl and it’s not everyday you meet a man you’ve once seen on TV and heard on the radio. She’s the kind of slut who climbs the ladder socially and is obviously easily impressed, because any self respecting person would just laugh at Billy Ray’s success like the rest of us, while she jumped at the opportunity and fucked him because he was way cooler in her town than every other guy she worked her way through with her vagina, from the local bar owner, to the local rodeo champ, to the highschool football quarterback and anyone who seemingly was more glamorous, connected and richer than her. I could be wrong, I usually am, but either way she looks like a fake titty slut and Billy Ray was her salvation from her miserable country life where she was known as Latiticia, a pretty solid stripper name, but now that she’s made it she just goes by “Tish” and this is her skinny Miley Mom Ass.


Bonus that’s not really a bonus – Miley on a Date, which thew me off a little because I expected the only guys she’d sleep with to be a little older, like in their 40s, balding, Jewish and in a suit rockin’ the Disney corporate credit card like nobody’s business, but maybe this is her way of telling us that she’s normal and dates other rich kids in her neighborhood along with the executives at Disney. Who knows or cares, because at least she’s living up to her slut reputation and I should be more supportive of that, even though I don’t think it will last, his car doesn’t even have a leather interior.

Posted in:Ass|Miley Cyrus|Mom

2008

04

Sep

Ashlee Simpson and Grimace Were Separated at Birth of the Day

13 Comments »

McDonald’s has ruined many people’s lives by jacking them up with shitty processed high calorie food that has caused premature death and obesity related diseases, but to make things worse, they have also alienated any of the obese people they have made from wearing purple because shit just makes them look like Grimace and leads to lots of pointing and laughing and making little kids cry.

Here are some pictures of Ashlee Simpson in a purple outfit lookin’ like her and Grimace are cut from the same cloth, but purple doesn’t make a monster, being Ashlee Simspon does. So as she peddles her low quality garbage clothing line at low income clothing stores scraping the bottom of the celebrity barrel, she can swing by McDonald’s to see how her old friends at McDonaldland are holding up since she left them many years ago, I hear Ronald’s a convicted pedophile and Hamburglar has changed his name to Hamburgerapist, but neither as bad as this Grimace, who went onto marry a gender bending weirdo who knocked her up and did this to her….

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Grimace

2008

04

Sep

Kardinall Offishall Parties with the Pussy Cat Dolls of the Day

5 Comments »

Kardinal Offishall is a Canadain rapper who is about to drop his new album and make himself famous on the international level and you’ve probably heard his song with Akon. Now I don’t know Kardinal personally just because we live in the same country, but I do know that some dude who works with him hooked my stepdaughter up with amazing seats at an amazing concert with Wyclef and Akon a few months ago and he sent me this video of them in Malaga, Spain for a massive music festival, having dinner with The Pussycat Dolls & Louis Hamilton (Tiger Woods of Formula One), where they film some crazy Spanish homeless lookin’ dude dancing, before the redheaded Pussycat badly dances with him semi erotically, like she used to back when she was a stripper. So since I just woke up and I am behind on the latest celebrities doing boring things in pictures, I figured I’d throw it up for you and remind you that Kardinal Offishall’s team is nice to me and that’s more than I can say with every other company I have ever contacted, so support him if you can.

Posted in:Kardinal Offishall|Pussycat Dolls

2008

03

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

7 Comments »

I managed to get invited to some Chrtistian potluck dinner party and I am not sure why since I don’t know the people hosting and I am not Christian. It’s facebook and maybe they think I am some other Jesus Martinez that is part of their Church or something, but the picture of the old man lickin’ the panties would normally red flag someone into thinking that maybe I’m not the kind of guy they want at a Christian potluck, a Catholic potluck, I’d understand since priests have been licking the skidmarks out of 10 year old boys’ tighty whities for generations, but Christians are too fuckin’ scared of God to be accepting of that.

Anyway this was the message / group email I got about the event:

Hey Fellow Followers!

I wanted to do an inventory of food for the Super Potluck we’re doing Saturday at the church. We’ll be providing the drinks, hot dogs and burgers and Bill will be running the corn roast like he does every year. There will be lots of fun activities and games for the kids like the annual Bible Track and Field and the Father / Child relay race and we will be sure to make time for announcements, prayer and some bible readings. We are just asking for you to bring 10 dollars to donate to the Church and a really yummy dish. So Please let me know what you’re bringing. God will be watching over us and the weather should be great and so should the day. I will be there but will you?

Brenda

I wrote back saying:

I’m bringing my rock hard cock for your mouth, it may not be the yummy dish you were hoping for, in fact you may hate it but I promise I’ll only stick it in your ass, you know to keep your vagina virginity for marriage like you’re supposed to. Remember anal sex is just one of God’s great creations. I won’t be bringing the 10 dollars but I will totally jerk off on your face while God is watching over both us and the weather!! You have no idea how much of a blast this is going to be.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

It wasn’t a proud moment, but my links are and here they are….

Anna Lynne McCord is the New 90210 Slut and Here are a Bunch of Pics of Her
GO

Slick Chicks Oil Wrestling
GO

Here’s a Clip From Lohan’s New Oscar Winning Role
GO

I’d Still Totally Bang Liz Hurley
GO

Johnny Knoxville Kicks Steve-O In The Nuts Video
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Canadian Women’s Wrestling
GO

Keeley Hazell is Topless Again. I AM SHOCKED!
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Sharon Stone’s Pokies Say How Do You Do
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I’d Rather Be Bald, Then Have Shitty Hairplugs
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The History Of Hollywood’s Sex Addicts:
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John McCain is a Weightlifting Champion
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The 10 Hottest Fart VIdeos in Internet History
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Jessica Simpson Calls Tony Roma Her FBD (Future Baby Daddy), That Would Scare Me the Fuck Off
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Hello Seren Gibson
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I Mean, Who Doesn’t Want to 69 It?
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Get Her Done!
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Now Here’s an Episode of Cribs I Can Relate To
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Mena Suvari Gallery
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And That’s Why You Need to Keep Your Cool
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Elton John Hates Lily Allen
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Triplets, Ain’t Nothing Wrong With That
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Somehow, Diving Boards Always Go Wrong
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Pretty Pool Babes
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Marry Me Martina Warren
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The Lovely, Lovely Kira
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Okay, Well This is the Scariest Thing I Have Ever Heard In My Life
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Shut the Fuck Up Jessica Simpson
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Jennifer Lopez Looks Hot On the Cover of Elle, and By Hot I Mean Completely Photoshopped so She Looks Nothing Like Her Real Self
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Christina Auilera Tranny Clown As Per Usual
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Striptease of the Day
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Fat Mom Ruins the Party
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Lookin’ Good Sweethearts
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Bathroom Honesty
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I Loe You Miranda Kerr
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Who Knew World Cup Was So Amazing?
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Find The Best Jerk Off Material
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Sadie Jones and Her Water Pipe
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Madonna Hates Her Tour Crew
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Please God Let This Be a Trend
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So That’s How the World Is Going to End
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Kocsis Orsi is the International Babe of the Day
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Funny Translation Guide for Stupid and Slutty Women
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Keely Hazell Topless in NUTS Again of the Day
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X-Tina and Her Tits Posing With Her New Smell
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Katherine Heigl Scares Puppies
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Blow a Job Interview on Purpose
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Asian Girl Getting Fucked
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Some Dude Who Thinks He’s a Pimp Gets His Co-Workers in Lingerie
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More of His Co-Workers in Lingerie
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Some Girl Shows Her Tits
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Some Vegas Whore Wearing 2 Bras…Because One Isn’t Enough for this Small Breasted Slut
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

03

Sep

Sarah Palin’s Politician Slut Daughter of the Day

43 Comments »


Governor’s Shirt that Reads “Broke but not Flat Busted”…Classy….

So there is some huge scandal about the Republicans and their whole pro-life and teaching abstinence in schools bullshit, because the Governor of Alaska and McCain’s Vice President candidate, Sarah Palin, who is a pretty hot fuckin’ politician and grandmother and ex-beauty queen has has a 17 year old daughter who just finished being teen pregnant out of wedlock and may be pregnant again despite having a baby and is rumored to be marrying her baby’s daddy or some shit to justify the moral fight her mother is fighting and make it look less fucked up than it all is….

Now I am one to blame a parent for the way their daughters act, except when it comes to teenagers fucking because I am a fan of that and it’s kinda just the way things go. You can blame Sarah Palin for is thinking that abstinence is a possibility and not a dated ideal or myth that never really worked since we all are horny and like fucking and always have been horny and liked fucking and it’s hit her family directly. You can also blame her for the fact that she is anti-abortion and her teachings lead her daughter to bring a baby into the world, making her pretty unattractive to future men who don’t like a chick with baggage as much as they don’t like a chick who is anti-abortion for fear of knocking her up and being stuck to her for life, when all they want to do is get off. I guess in a lot of ways it is hypocritical to stand there preaching one thing, while the product of your household have turned your family into some kind of Jerry Springer Baby Daddy episode, proving that your thinking is not relevant to the world since it didn’t even work in your own home.

Either way, it’s stirring up some shit and I got this email:

Bristol Palin. That’s the name of the daughter of the lady that wants to be Vice-President of the U.S. I want to know if she’s hot and I want pictures (non nudes you know – she’s only 17)

She’s 17 and pregnant which means she fucks – but if she’s going to be spending any time in the White House she ought to be hot. That Clinton slag was awful and I don’t want a repeat of that shit in my country. It’s already bad enough without more ugly sluts in DC.

Jesse

P.S. Find out if the mom (Sarah Palin) has any sex tapes/photos? If she doesn’t I suspect there will be tons of them if her party is elected. She looks just as slutty as her daughter.

Then I got this email:

here are some pictures from the Myspace page of a girl named Mercede, who happens to be the sister of the father of Bristol Palin’s baby.   (or both babies??)

They show underage drinking, guns and all things that make this Sarah Palin republican kinda full of shit, but in their defense, if I grew up in Alaska, I’d be drinking and fucking and shooting things all the time too since there’s not much else to do, not to mention with a name like Mercede you’re kinda setting her up to be a drunken party slut at birth, but I wouldn’t be trying to enforce lies that got her family into this whole mess to the rest of America because it doesn’t work.

Sure you can’t judge her family life and her kid’s decisions in regards to her political talent, but I tend to blame the parents when they have fuck up kids for fucking up somewhere down the line and so does the rest of the world. Maybe her real life experience will provide some insight to how the world actually works when she’s in office and I don’t care either way, since I am in Canada and whether you are an Obama or McCain supporter or not, you can still look at this and say shit’s a little fucked up and that’s all I have to say about that.
Here are those myspace pics of Bristol Palin’s baby daddy’s teenage sister, I expect a lawsuit soon.






Posted in:Governor Sarah Palin

2008

03

Sep

Jordan Sells Horse Products of the Day

8 Comments »

Jordan was out promoting her newest business venture with her newest set of small tits, because I guess she figures that her tits have got her about as far as they can and it’s time to get rid of the freakshow fantasy she’s been inspiring because shit causes back pains and just accept the fact that she’s done really well for someone with no skills other than having no shame and no fear of the scalpel.

Her new product is clothing for horses, because I guess she’s trying to class up her image or maybe it’s just a retaliation to not being allowed in any of the equestrian clubs because she didn’t meet the dress code and is starting up her own for the other trash with enough money from being whores and a dream of wanting to be a professional horseback rider and up until recently were forced to practice on men, many men on their rise to the top because she couldn’t afford a horse of her own or some shit. Maybe she just sees the opening in the market that sluts can’t slut up their horses like they were grown up Barbie Dolls and all the other horse products out there are traditional, boring and stuffy. She’s innovating, trendsetting and keeping it classy by taking a classy thing and bringing it down to the stripclub level and it’s all pretty entertaining because I heard she did it because horse dick is the only dick that touches the walls of her huge vagina when they fuck and it’s her way of guaranteeing cock as she ages and no one wants anything to do with her since horses are way less judgmental about fucking a herpes outbreak.

On a side note, it looks like her horse has colored contacts in and that freaks me the fuck out.

Posted in:Horse Cock|Jordan|Katie Price