I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

09

Jul

Alicia Keys and Her Thick Legs of the Day

My wife told me i am getting fat and that when I walk, my tits bounced. I asked her if she’s looked in the mirror over the last 5 years, because she’s so fucking fat, she’s got tits growing on the back of her fuckin’ knees. She then told me that she was at a friend’s house watching Oprah and they said that for every 30 pounds you lose, you gain an inch on your cock. That way when I fuck her, maybe I’ll be able to make it past her labia and she’ll feel something. I told he that her fat herpes ridden pussy is the last thing I want to make it into and that I am going to go out and try to gain another 60 pounds so that I don’t even have a penis anymore because that’s what she fucking does to me, she started to cry, but not as loud as Alicia Keys’ piano stool, she looks heavy and I assume shit is reinforced, otherwise it’d be trying to kill itself by breaking in half. Here are some pics of her thick legs performing recently because you’ll take what you can get.

Posted in:Alicia Keys|Fat Legs

2008

09

Jul

I Have No Idea Who Loui Batley is But She Is in a Bikini of the Day

Hollyoaks is some UK soap opera and Loui Bately is some high school drop out who is on the show. These are some pictures of her in a bikini for some calendar shoot that may be old, but are being posted because they are bikini pics and it’s my only way of dealing with the fact that somehwere out there, girls are out in their bikinis, having a good time and lookin’ good while I sit here waiting to die. That’s all I have to say about that.

Posted in:Bikini|Loui Batley

2008

09

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

I am not a racist!!! This email proves it….

Hey Drunken Stepfather.

I really like your blog. I’ve been reading it regularly for like a year or something. So I remember when you were posting about how people were emailing you saying that you are racist against black people. But I’m black and I never really thought you were racist. Well now these jews wanna jump on the bandwagon. Don’t they know that the beauty of ur site is that you offend equally? They need to stop. Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I don’t think you’re a racist.

So there, I am not a racist, brought to you directly from the horses mouth…..if I was racist, I wouldn’t have posted her email because I’d just be amazed that a non-human learned how to type to me, but instead I respect what she has to say and think she’s very lovely.

Here are my links:

Mariah Carey is Photoshopped Hard in her Bikini for Elle
GO

Guitar Hero Bikini Girl Video
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Jennifer Ellison Topless In Nuts
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The Tara Ried Grossness Tour 2008
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They Can Take Her Unborn Baby – But They Can’t Take Her Nipples
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The World’s BEST Boob Jobs
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Erik Estrada Got Jumped by a Midget on Camera
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Porn Stars That Would Make Movies Better:
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10 Dopest Kicks Ever Homies….
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100 Celebrities Arrested for Drugs….
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10 Hottest Lingerie Models
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Kate Hudson Sluttin’ It Up On The Tennis Court
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Liv Tyler is Topless in Denmark…..
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Celine Dion Bathing Suit Pics….
GO

A Couple Having Sex on the Roof
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Flavor Flav boned a girl in the bushes at age 6:
GO

Somaya Reece is in the Tub
GO

Freestyle Basketball
GO

Web Sluts That Are as Dependable As Your Mom, Who Is Also a Slut
GO

Prank Call Gone Bad Ends Up Being Hilarious
GO

Find Girls To Fuck, Because Pretending Your Sister is Your Girlfriend is Pretty sick Dude
GO

Victoria’s Secret Backstage Shots
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And That’s Why Girls SHouldn’t Ride Bikes Off of Ramps
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Evenging Dress Strippers
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Italy’s Channel 5 Bombshell Newscaster Tit Video Compilation
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Lucy Pinder’s 2009 Calendar is Complete
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Amy Reid Uber Glam NAKED as FUCK
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Name and Number Please
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Lohan Showing Off Her Lesbian Tits
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Paris Hilton Comes Up With the Worst Idea Ever
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Porn for Days
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6 Skirts Fighting the Wind at the British Grand Prix
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Some Israeli Model Gets Paparazzi-ed on the Beach in Her Bikini
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STDs on the Rise for Old Folks….
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Kanye West’s Daily Cry Baby Post From His Web Site
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Men’s Suit Ads…with a babe in lingerie being strangled:
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Cold War Cheerleader Showdown
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Day Shift Hooker Alert!
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Kate Moss is Single Again
GO

Striptease of the Day
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Get Help Finding Sex Today, Because We All Need a Little Helping Hand, But Not in The Masterbation Type of Way
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A Very Busty Marta
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Guy Falls Through Hole on a Bridge
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More of How to Make a Girl Cum
GO

A Drunk Redneck Beatdown is the Best Type of Beatdown There Is
GO

The Yankees Are Better Than You
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How To Lose a Baseball Contract in One Easy Step
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Miss Ghetto of the Year
GO

Beatrice Borromeo Bikini Pictures From Tuscany!
GO

Corey Haim is Still All Sorts of Fucked Up
GO

Cynthia Rodriguez Knows How To Play
GO

Shyla Jennings Dances on Webcam
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Italian Babe Monica Bellucci Does Elle France
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Michael Vick is Back in the News
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Extreme Prank from Venezuelan TV
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British Toddlers Are Racist
GO

Zlex Rodriguez Loves Strippers, So I Guess We Have that in Common
GO

Keeley Hazell is Naked in French Maxim
GO

Playboy Babe – Laura Croft
GO

Why Computers Were Invented
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Spycam Bathroom Fun
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Big Boobs Give You the Best Point of View
GO

Hack Digital Pics and Send Secret Messages
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

08

Jul

Amy Winehouse Shows Some Bush of the Day

Everyone gives Amy Winehouse a hard time about having disgusting teeth, disgusting hair and pretty much disgusting everything. They think she doesn’t wash, they think she’s just given up, but when lookin’ at these pictures of her bush slowly growing in, it looks like something that’s barely been neglected for that long. I know bitches who are hairier than this who wax once a week and I know bitches who never shave or wax and look like they have a pillow in their panties, a very crusty, smelly pillow, but a pillow none the less. The point is that this skinny, dying, walking corpse’s pubic hair is a serious turn on, especially in a world where bush is pretty much going extinct because girls claim they don’t like how it feels but in reality think that guys hate bush and are just trying to please us, when guys would really fuck anything thrown there way, and sometimes even pay for it from bitches on street corners who look like Winehouse. I am in love.

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Bush

2008

08

Jul

Jaime Pressly and her Black Bikini of the Day

Jaime Pressly is a hot mom out in a bikini. Sure she looks like she’s had a ton of plastic surgery, but I am all for people trying to better themselves by hiring a surgeon to play God on their faces. I am not one of those people who is out lookin’ for natural beauty, sure I hate fake tits, but I just like lookin’ at skinny chicks, even if they have faces that look like they crawled out of the septic tank, or an eating disorder, but that’s just because I’ve been so absorbed in obesity all these years that I am earning to rub my balls against a hot pertruding rib cage and spine on the back of a girl so hungry she can’t resist my sexiness.

Posted in:Bikini|Jaime Pressly

2008

08

Jul

Victoria Silvstedt Isn’t Topless in a Bikini in St Tropez of the Day

Here are some pictures of slut Victoria Silvstedt in a bikini again. I know I get repetitive about this whore being a whore and that’s only because she tried to take me down with a lawsuit when I posted pics of her getting eaten out by some married Greek midget billionaire. I don’t have the pictures up anymore, and usually I don’t get mad when girls attack, I figure it’s their weird way of flirting with me and I always try to reverse it so that I end up being the Mexican broke ass midget eating her out in the next set of pics that hit, but it never really works out like that.

I wasn’t going to go up against her, since her pockets are a lot deeper than mine and that is a huge part of my depression. All I needed to make this life a better was to be born a skinny blonde chick with fake tits who everyone wants to fuck, not only would I be able to afford a TV, but I’d also be able to go around suing random people to keep me entertained in my dull, useless, silicone filled life.

Posted in:Bikini|St. Tropez|Victoria Silvstedt

2008

08

Jul

Tara Reid’s Weird Stomach in a Bikini of the Day

Party girl Tara Reid was out in a bikini with some gay dude who I have seen in other pictures of her. He is latching the fuck onto her as hard as he can because he wants to get some exposure and figures that since Tara Reid is slowly fading away and too drunk to realize who she is hanging out with, it’s a great stepping stone that may lead to bigger or better things, and that even if it doesn’t will land him on TMZ and other celebrity blogs, which is a big deal to an attention craving gay dude and that’s why he did his hair for the occassion.

I tried the same strategy to make myself famous in the past, because I figure famous dudes get hot pussy, make good money and can sit by the pool all day while the rest of the world works their 9 to 5 grind to pay for their kids Nintendo Wii, but the closest thing to Tara Reid fame that was accessible for me to entourage was this really colorful homeless dude, who dresses like a clown and does juggling tricks while rapping and dancing. It didn’t get me much exposure, but I did smoke crack for the first time and that’s almost better than being famous, except for maybe the realization you can’t afford another hit….

Either way, Tara Reid’s stomach has Aids.

BONUS – It Looks Like People Still Think Tara Reid is Relevant Enough to Ask for Autographs on Out Dated Sexy Pics of Her, That Must Really Boost Her Self Esteem….

Posted in:Bikini|Tara Reid

2008

08

Jul

Jessica Simpson and Her Cougar Cleavage of the Day

It was Jessica Simpson’s birthday get together, at least that’s what people are saying, because her birthday is in 2 days. If you are wondering why I know that, which I am sure you are, because I don’t even know my own birthday, it’s because I looked it up because she looked like she was getting on in years. It turns out that she’s turning 28, so that means she’s only a few years away from being a dried up cougar at the end of the hotel bar, licking her lips for some college kids in her cleavage shirt, trying to cover up her muff gut, in hopes of getting dick and encouraging the kids to cum in her, or on her face so she can artificially inseminate herself, only to find out she’s waited too long and is barren.

It’s a sad lonely life for such a hot set of tits.

Posted in:cleavage|Jessica Simpson|Tits

2008

08

Jul

Ashlee Simpson’s Got Hard Pregnant Nipples of the Day

I heard when girls get pregnant, their nipples turn dark brown, so it’s safe to say that Ashlee Simpson has herself some African nipples and shit are hard while she’s out shopping with her fat baby filled uterus while Jessica sits at home crying and eating a container of ice cream because no one she wants is willing to knock her up, which is unfortunate because I know I would. Shit’s a pretty solid retirement plan, one better that knocking Ashlee Simpson.

The only mystery in all this is who knocked up this Simpson and why is Pete Wentz taking the blame, because everyone knows he’s scared of vagina, mainly his own.

Here’s some bonus pictures of Ashlee Simpson yesterday dressed like a french painter or someone married to a commerical Emo sexually confused asshole or a sailer at the ragatta lookin’ fat and fat tittied because she’s pregnant and not because she’s wearing horizontal stripes. See, I know fashion.

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Hard Nipples|Pregnant Nipples

2008

08

Jul

Perez Hilton’s New Body Offends Me of the Day

Here’s a pretty repulsive video to start your day of Perez Hilton showing what working out with a celebrity trainer can do for you, because now that he makes 50,000,000 dollars a year, more than most celebrities do, he can afford to get help. At first, I was thinking dude had Aids, but remembered that he’s too ugly to get laid and instead has turned to the computer to fill the void that is his unattractiveness.

Truth is that I think dude probably should have waited another 6 months of working out before showing off his progress, because right now all I see is one too many boxes of donuts while motherfucker sits at home writing teenage girl stupidities about Hollywood. Sure,t I may still be fatter than Perez, but I’m not about to get topless on camera to not only offend the Gay community, but also the world.

I will say that there’s no way this fucker is really gay, sure he’s got pretty homo hair and dresses pretty homo and speaks with a lisp, but no gay dude would ever look like this and the gay dudes I know on cocaine and laxative diets, not just because it cleans the passage for better smelling bum fucking, but because gay dudes are vain as shit. There’s reason why every time I go to gay clubs in hopes of getting free drinks I end up getting nothing and that is because fat is worse than Aids in the gay community and I’ve even heard of some dude intentionally getting aids so that they can lose weight easier than diet and exercise with the added benefit of bareback sex with other fags without concern of landing Aids because they already have it….

Either way, dude’s trying to get words of encouragement from his fat readers who find his quest to get in shape inspiring, because people in his real life don’t answer his calls….Even his parents.

Posted in:New Body