I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

13

Nov

I am – Sarah Harding Nipple Slip from Yesterday of the Day

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So being the shitty blogger that I am, I posted all these pictures of a useless slut named Sarah Harding from some useless UK Spice Girls rip off called Girls Aloud yesterday and I didn’t post the nipple slip. Consider this a maintenance post for a guy who isn’t too good at fixing things I’ve fucked up because I’d be spending my entire day backtracking because I suck at life, but at least I am making the effort right now by bringing it to you now, because you like nipples in pictures since you can’t get nipples in life. Cuddles.

Posted in:Nipple|Sarah Harding|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Maxim Hometown Hotties Winner Erin of the Day

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So Maxim picked their hometown hotties winner and it’s some bitch named Erin. I am not sure if you bother caring, but I reviewed all the hometown hotties contestents and this is what I had to say about Erin….

Point of this is that she’s worth a round, but that’s not saying much to you, because the last time you ate a hamburger you got a boner just thinking about sliding your dick it it’s warm juicy goodness, you being blinded by your dick and sexual depravity makes you ignore that her tits are all wonky and she’s boxier than the trailer her Daytona Ass is from.

I guess that’s why Maxim hasn’t offered me a high paying job in New York that I would use to bag all the models and any decent lookin’ girl I run into promising them the chance at the cover, while knowing I’d never have that pull, but they wouldn’t need to know that until after they shower for me, because showering for me would obviously be the auditioning process.

Check out all of Erin’s Slutty Winning Pictures
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Read my hometown hotties reviews
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Posted in:Erin McKinnon|Hometown Hotties|Maxim|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Nicole Scherzinger’s Trying Too Hard of the Day

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I just got this email:

hello, i love reading your site.. laugh my ass off

im thinking of starting one myself. do you have any advice? where do you find photos?

thanks
youre super funny

Sure dude, why don’t I just start your site for you and have you not pay me a fucking cent, because I’m an asshole and can only hope that my hard work makes your site bigger and better than mine, because let’s face it, I have a pretty shitty fucking website, but at least you think it’s funny, even though it’s not meant to be.

I don’t understand why anyone would want to start a website, people who own websites are losers. The internet was made by losers for losers, like FUBU but different. There was a time when I’d go online just to mess around with socially awkward fuck ups lookin’ for like minded socially awkward fucked up people from other towns, because I guess there’s only so many losers in one zip code. It was a time when online dating was for obese people and virgins and not for the college frat boy to land hot pussy on myspace or facebook, or even for you to go home after getting wasted and being able to stalk the girl you just made out with. It was a better time with more person to person contact, and less talking to screens.

I remember when I first started doing this garbage 3 years ago, no one was really doing it. Perez didn’t exist, TMZ didn’t exist, the ones that did exist were just virgins and fags posting pictures and obsessing over how much they loved celebrities. No one was ripping into them or laughing at them and now new fucking websites pop up everyday and are all a lot more successful that I’ll ever be….within their first week.

Reality is that Internet is still for fucking losers, because hot and cool people are out living life and are too busy being hot and cool to care about sitting in front of a fucking computer all day, unless they are at work, but hot and cool people don’t work and hot and cool people who do work are usually running shit and are too busy loving themselves and their businesses to waste time on the net. So reality is if you are hot and on the net from work, your job is obviously insignificant making you a loser, but send me nudes, I’ll make you feel better about yourself, even though we all know what you are, if you’re reading this. So we don’t need to give the internet back to the losers, the definition of loser has just broadened its scope.

Speaking of try hard losers, here are some pictures of Nicole Scherzinger’s busted face giving the peace sign that is so fucking played out by now that every time I see it, I get flashbacks of high school girls at starbucks posing for their myspace profiles, and let’s face it, Nicole Scherzinger hasn’t been in high school for at least 2 decades and is trying a little too hard to be a high school girl. The only cool thing about high school girls are their school uniforms…and anal sex parties that I heard about on Oprah, that I never seem to be invited to.

Bonus – If You Think Nicole Scherzinger Music is a Bonus –

Preview of Her Baby Love Song Remixed and Featuring Will.I.Am
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Related Posts

Nicole Scherzinger’s Got Some Cleavage
Nicole Scherzinger’s Baby Love Video is Hot
Nicole Scherzinger’s Nipple in a Video
Nicole Scherzinger Tight Bodied at some Event in Jeans

Posted in:Busted Face|Legs|Nicole Scherzinger|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Demi Moore Bikini Pictures of the Day

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I once randomly met a dude who decided to open up to me about how he fell in love with a girl in a picture. I am not talking about you perverts who print up these celebrity pics and scrap book them to cum on at a later date when your mom’s out of town on business, I am talking about a girl who was on a picture at a bed and breakfast he was staying at in the South of France, I guess he’s a romantic like that and I joked about whether his picture went to the beach and got topless with him and if they had sex while having a picnic eating baguette and cheese while drinking cheap bottles of when and he wasn’t laughing, he was lookin’ traumatized.

He went on to tell me that day after day he would see this picture of a beautiful girl and he would obsess over it, like lying in bed at night thinking about who the mystery girl was. By the fourth night he cracked, and snuck down and got the picture and jerked off to it, because he was in love and wanted to consummate their relationship. The next day he had decided to ask the woman who owned the bed and breakfast who the girl in the picture was and she said it was her daughter when she was 20, the summer before she died in a car accident 10 years earlier.

I feel like that jerking off to dead people, is kinda the same feeling you’d get having sex with Demi Moore. Here are her bikini pictures.


Related Posts:

Vintage Demi Moore Nudes Before She Launched Her Career Cuz Naked is the Way to Fame
Ashton Kutcher’s Mustache
Demi Moore’s Nipple
Rumer Willis is Lookin’ Good Sweetheart

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Demi Moore|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Petra Nemcova’s Doing Good in Haiti of the Day

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I’ve decided that Haiti is my kind of country. Not because I am black or because I speak their obscure language, or because I am a taxi driver, but because motherfucker’s are poor and I feel like it’s a place I could feel like Kanye West on my wife’s disability check.

Either way, they recruit a hot washed up model to do charity because she’s only washed up from being caught in the Tsunami and shit killed her boyfriend, it’s pretty obvious that she’s still got it going on in a mail bride kinda way, unlike me, which is why I’d do good in Haiti. I feel like they’d appreciate my work ethic.

I was lookin’ at the pics of Petra Nemcova propped up so everyone could see her hot Eastern European ass pretending to support them, because it’s a good PR move for her celebrity and they are using collapsable chairs as the stage because that’s how classy Haiti is. It’s more ghetto than the shit I used to sit on in AA and broke through because I am fat, or the milk crate I use as a desk, or the box I use as my dinning room table next to my stained mattress I found outside 2 summers ago.

Either way, it’s nice to see her supporting black people with her charity that she started, I am sure more black people will bust nut thinking of her than ever before and there nothing wrong with using your money for good, because I know, if I ever had money, I’d only help myself get more drunk than I already do and on a more regular basis while sitting on a beach surrounded by hookers, but I’m just not a good of a person and karma likes to remind me of that every chance it gets, by never giving me money to get drunk on beaches with hookers….


Related Posts:

Petra Nemcova is Cleopatra on Halloween
Petra Nemcova’s Upskirt
Petra Nemcova’s Got Some Hot Naked Tits
Petra Nemcova’s Got Hot Clothed Tits

Posted in:Legs|Petra Nemcova|Short Skirt|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – The Victoria’s Secret Angels Fly Virgin Airlines of the Day

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I guess the best thing about the Victoria’s Secret Angels flying Virgin Airlines, is how many virgins jerk off to their pictures everyday. Yes, I am talking to you.

Speaking of talking, I was trying to seduce some model who is in Tampax commercials that I came across on the internet, because I feel like despite having the shittiest website on the internet, models in Tampax commercials should try to get all the free publicity they can get, even if it means letting me watch them shower on webcam to reachout to 6 masturbating dudes, so I figured I’d ask her on a date, not that I’d ever leave my house, but it felt like she’d respond better than asking for nude pics, as I often do and never get. When she rejected me I wrote this:

You weren’t going on a date with me regardless, because I don’t do dates, they are a waste of time, and I don’t leave my house, but I used to fuck wannabe models and they were also a waste of time, but at least I get to see them doing things they wouldn’t want their father seeing, unless they were from a dirty family….which sometimes happens because I met them at the bus stop and they were teenage runaways, who weren’t really wannabe models, but didn’t seem to mind the camera when they were sleeping….

She never responded. Either way, marrying a lingerie or bikini model’s always been a dream of mine that I kind of fell short on, like I have with most of my dreams. I never thought I’d end up with someone you’d think would be a good spokesperson for Dunkin’ Donuts, until we got our rejection letter from them because despite bitch being a great customer, her morbid obesity takes away from the message they are trying to get out to young mother’s on the go. Apparently fat doesn’t sell, but it does kill, just not fast enough, not that I want her dead, but it’d be a nice vacation….but not as nice as one on a plane with these bitches, because I hear there are no laws once you’re off the ground….and exposing myself vagina shaped penis, because I am an inny not an outty and that would be the best way to convince them that I am one of them and that they can trust me enough to show me their vaginas and let me watch them pee. When I do it in the park, I always seem to get in trouble.


Related Posts:

Heidi Klum is a Cat on Halloween
Alessandra Ambrosio is a Playboy Bunny on Halloween
Alessandra Ambrosio is a Slut
Adriana Lima is Hot of Pirelli in a See Through Outfit

Posted in:Adriana Lima|Alessandra Ambrosio|Heidi Klum|Unsorted|Victoria's Secret

2007

13

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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The older I get, the more confused I get when drinking. I try to keep up with the college kids and finish a 26 ouncer on my own but it always ends up messy. I just got an email from some girl saying how we made out multiple times in the night and that I wouldn’t stop chasing her around the club so she did it to get me to go away. I guess persistence is key and it’s really not cheating on my wife because I don’t consider making out cheating to begin with, but also because I have no fuckin memory of any of this. I seriously thought I was sober the whole night, but now that the stories are coming in, I just think I was amazing.

Here are my links:

A Paparazzi Is Seriously Injured While Chasing Britney Spears, Unfortunately I Don’t GIve a Fuck Because the Paparazzi Treat me Like Shit..and I Hope Someone Sues the Asshole Company He Works for Costing them A Lot Of Money So they Leave me the Fuck Alone
GO

I love the Rad Girls – Watch the Wheel of Puke Video because They are Classy Like That
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Mayrin Villanueva is the new Bond Girl and She’s Hot
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Some Webcam Girl Gets Caught in the Act By Her Dad, it’s fake.
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Janice Dickinson’s New Model Did Porn Before He Did Her Show…Check the Pics…
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Rosario Dawson Lookin’ Fuckin Hot in this Photoshoot
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Britney Spears Runs Red Lights Video Because She’s Above the Law
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Some Dude Gives His Gf a Bikini Wax
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LA Ink’s Kat Von D Interviewed
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Some Chick Named Maggie Q Wears her Bra to an Event
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Angelina Jolie has a Rip in The Ass of Her Leather Pants
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Some Winona Ryder Sex Scene I Think I Posted Last Week…But Don”t Remember Cuz I’ve Been Drinkin’
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Audrina Partridge Has an Upskirt Moment because She’s Single Now
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The Spice Girls do a Commercial for Some UK Wal Mart Because they Take All The Work They Can Get
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Audrina Partridge and Her Rebound Because She Just Broke Up With Her Boyfriend
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Girls With Hourglass Figures are Smarter then Girls Without….
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Nicole Sherzinger’s Got Some Hot Maxim Pictures
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The Megan Good Tit Flash I was Too Lazy to Post About Today
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Furries Attack In Japan
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Some Crazy Japanese Game Show Contestant Molests The Audience…
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Maria Sharapova May Not Know How to Dress But At Least She’s Got Insane Legs
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Some Girl In a Short Skirt Prank
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Real Prison Chicks Getting Down and Dirty
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Drunk Girls Grinding on the Floor Video
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James Woods is Robbin the Craddle with this 21 Year Old Girlfriend
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Paul McCartney Calls Heather Mills a One Legged Bitch Because She has One Leg and a Vagina….
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This is What Britney’s VMA Performance Was Supposed to Look Like
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Heidi Montag Backin’ Her Thang Up Like She Knows How to Dance in Vegas
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Paris Hilton’s Got Period Teeth
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Elisabetta Gregoraci is Fuckin’ Hot in Her Bikini Bent Over
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Kelly Brooke Does Some Nude Flower Pictures
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Hayden Panettiere Beefs Up at the Gym wearing Shorts
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart the Diana Ross Edition
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Some Extreme Caterpillar Dancing Video
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Some Road Raging Dentist Caught on Tape
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Lesbian Video of the Day
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Lots of Slutty Girls Gettin’ Busy in the Clubs Video
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Paris Hilton Looks Better in Black and White
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Beth Ditto Throws Up on Homophobes…because They Throw Up on Her First…
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Some Assholes Let His Friends Shoot Him With a Potato Gun
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Some Busty UK Chick Named Seren Gibson is Topless for Front Magazine
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Penis Enlargement Spam is Poetic
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Behind the Scenes with Sofia Margarita Stuff Magazine Photoshoot Cuz It’s Hot
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Some Girl’s Vagina on Photobucket
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some Girl Gets Naked for Someone on Photobucket
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Photobucket Allows People to Post Lesbian Shit Because They are a Fuckin’ Porn Site
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Some Midget Wrestler Gets Knocked the Fuck Out
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Some Amputee Erotica Video Because Sometimes One Leg is Better than 2
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The Worst Acting in a Porn Video Ever
GO

Use this Spray to Get Laid
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

12

Nov

I am – Sarah Harding at some Lingerie Store Opening of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Sarah Harding doing the Paris Hilton at some store opening, because I guess when you’re some washed up popstar from the UK, Paris Hilton seems like some kind of success story that’s making all the right moves, so bitch goes out and does her hair like her, and shows up at events and poses like her, and even has the wonky eye shit going on, when all she really needs to do is take the free lingerie she gets from hosting this shitty Mall-lookin’ event, and make a fucking video for us all to dance to and by dance I mean masturbate, like I used to do to her shitty UK pop music, it just touched me in all the right places. But that was a long time ago, when masturbating was the only thing I had going for me…and now God’s even taken that away from me.

Speaking of loss, I know that girls aren’t as influenced by Paris as they were a few years ago because she’s old. Now they are all doing the Soulja Boy dance, when 5 years ago they were saying “that’s hot” and weren’t wearing underwear while suckin’ off their boyfriends on video. It’s kinda sad to have lost that too. I guess what it comes down to is that the world is a cold dark place but at least we still have our tears to cry with…


Related Posts:

Sara Harding Flashing Her Tits
Cheryl Tweedy Cole’s Animal Print Bra
Cheryl Tweedy Cole in a See Thru Shirt
Cheryl Tweedy Cole in a Bikini

Posted in:Lingerie|Sarah Harding|Unsorted

2007

12

Nov

I am – Sarah Michelle Gellar Maxim December 2007 Preview of the Day

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So I got an email saying that Sarah Michelle Gellar is the Maxim December 2007 covergirl with a link to some of the previews. I was pretty surprised because I feel like she’s fuckin’ washed up and that I have a better chance being a Maxim Covergirl than she does, but that’s only because I have hot tits, for a dude, and that shit should be fuckin’ acknowledged because I’ve spent a lot of time sitting and drinking and eating bad foods to make this shit happen and that’s all I have to say about that.

Check Out Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Magazine Preview
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Posted in:Lingerie|Maxim|Sarah Michelle Gellar|Unsorted

2007

12

Nov

I am – Pam Anderson’s Insane Tits of the Day

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I was at a bar drinking my life away, as I sometimes do and this busty middle-aged hooker Pam Anderson is her idol bitch sat down next to me. She was wearing a “Guess” t-shirt, so I said 36 D, and instead of slapping me, she liked the attention and said 36 DD. The sad party of this story is that this pick-up line is fucking genius, but the only bitches who rock “Guess” t-shirts are trashy older ladies that buy the shit at the discount center. There was a time when every chachi motherfucker girl and cheap french slut rocked this shit in this city. It’s not the cool choice anymore because all the bitches are into American Apparel or designer clothes, but if you’re from some trashy town, you may have the chance to drop this line and should, because a girl in guess is a girl who likes talking about her tits.

Here are some pictures of Pam Anderson’s ridiculously huge tits and hard nipples in some parachuting outfit, lookin like every cheap stripper who still thinks Guess is cool.

I think drinking has ruined my ability to tell stories. I’ll work on that for later today, when I sober up, or get more drunk that shit makes more sense to me.


Related Posts:

Pam Anderson’s Vagina Exposed
Pam Anderson’s Vagina Puppy
Pam Anderson’s Shitty Nipple Slip

Posted in:Implants|Nipples|Pamela Anderson|Tits|Unsorted