DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

Celine Farach is the Instagram Of The Day

Sydney Sweeney Life Jacket Suffocated Tits of the Day

Delilah Belle Hamlin’s Bikini. Taking Over Canada of the Day

Michal Idan is the Instagram Of The Day

Old Lady Heidi Klum Tries and Delivers but is Still Boring of the Day

2021

Aug

Miley Cyrus Ass of the Day

No Comments »

I will look at Miley’s pussy from behind, whether in panties, or leotard any fucking day of the week, because I don’t think there’s anything I like more than Pussy from Behind…even if it is clothed pussy. Big fan over here and I am a fan of nothing, I am unimpressed by everything, I’ve only asked for an autograph once, and it was some Olympian who was at a bar about 20 years ago surrounded by chicks and I pulled my fat tit out and insisted he sign it….I’ve done weird things…that was one of them…BUT I WOULD ASK MILEY’S PUSSY for an autograph…

Whether that would involve putting a paint brush up inside her where she tries to write out “MILEY PUSSY”…kind of like when they give Elephant’s paintbrushes to make art with ideally more tightness even though this pussy has fucked….or just taking the simpler cover her pussy in finger pant and smash it against my face….repeatedly so that I don’t miss any of her pussy ridges….maybe even get some anus on my forehead in the mix….so that I can take it to the tattoo artist to trace it so I forever have Miley’s pussy on my face…..I’m into it.

She’s racy, she’s inspired a generation of girls to get naked on the internet thanks to her Disney Handler seeing a need for that…for whatever reason…they’re perverts too…clearly…and I’m a forever fan because we need puppets in the mainstream to jerk off to. It’s just fucking science bro….believe all science.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2021

Aug

Madelaine Petsch Got Them Tits On of the Day

No Comments »

I FUCKING hate Riverdale…

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, it was likely designed to be a made for TV movie, they dragged it out into a series, the series hit, so the writers with no real back-up plan thinking it was a one a done…a PUMP and DUMP…a fuck her and leave her were faced with a “oh shit, we have 5 more seasons of this shit to do”….it got popular, thanks to the generation of people into this being full fucking retards with no standards and no interest in good writing…because they are too busy not paying attnetion….the show makes no fucking sense….

The only thing that does make sense is the casting of Madelaine Petsch, a rich kid with South African roots who decided to take on the entertainment industry cuz she’s a rare and beautiful jewell….a hot redhead who despite all the bad press redheads have got since the dawn of humanity…whether being seen as Vampires thanks to Judas being a redhead who killed Jesus..to other interesting Redheads being left in the woods when they were born like in Willow…they are a feared and weirdly strong species….but sometimes a hot one surfaces and must be celebrated.

Everyone else cast on the show is dog shit, ARCHIE is a queer, Jughead also a Queer, Betty is a monster sized nightmare and Veronica is some neckless MAYAN who as of recent paparazzi pics, seems to have a great ass, but for the first 4 seasons was a fucking disappointment…but this one, CHERRY BLOSSOM as they call her, sings, dances, which I hate, but can handle when a hot chick is doing it, and along with a fit tight body, also has some titties…she’s great…the show that made her is not..and here are those tits.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Madelaine Petsch

2021

Aug

Cara Delevingne Nude of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t know what these Cara Delevingne selfies are from, they’re circulating in some clickbait to get attention, because all press is good press, whether she masterminded it or some hacker weirdo figured out her twitter password was “LoveEatingPussy”…or some other lesbian reference becuase in the event you didn’t know…she is a pussy eater….usually pussy that is more important than her, it’s all part of the social ladder climb….

I do know that I don’t find Cara Delevingne to be as ugly as her attention seeking makes her, I’m more into a chilled out approach to fame, not a “people notice me, so I’ll make them notice me all the fucking time, until they can’t fucking stand me, but will still hire me, cuz if they don’t they’re not hip to the trends”….

I don’t think she deserved all the traditional model hype she got, maybe she was better suited to being an influencer by my useless standards no one cares about….you know the party girl who is fun to have at your party because she’s wild, silly, and eats pussy….but that doesn’t need to be taken seriously in other aspects of what she does…not that anyone takes models seriously, even the people who hire them are like “We pay this idiot how much to do what?”…..

The fact is that she’s skinny…and that Ashley Benson has eaten her ass to get some of her fecal bacteria, which has in-turn helped Benson get skinny, and that’s probably her most important legacy, because Benson may only have half the followers Delevingne, but I’ll assume dating Benson still elevated her profile, because Delevingne has 40 million followers, Benson 20 million, but Benson is far less try hard for followers…and as far as I’m concerned more important in the system than Cara is…but what the fuck do I know….she’s naked, hiding her vagina, that despite being lesbian…..

Now the important question is, has the secret vagina behind the heart emoji seen more dick than most, because it was a party girl vagina….or is it a virgin to dick because she’s so committed to the pussy, just not committed to showing hers outside of being an emoji….who fucking cares.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Cara Delevigne|Cara Delevingne

2021

Aug

Milf Monday of the Day

No Comments »

I am a firm believer that 100 percent of the population will be vaccinated, despite any protest and resistance, in part because they got over 60 percent of people to already hop onto the shot that’s not even approved by the people involved, which is pretty weird, you’d think they’d fake that or hyperloop speed that approval process, since it not being FDA approved is a huge fucking red flag…

I do believe that with 100 percent of the population being vaccinated, there will be the fun of getting booster shots every 6 months or else your vaccine passports will be invalid and you won’t be able to earn a living or buy essentials….you heathen killing the world with your unvaccinated blood……

But yeah, I’ve heard the conspiracies about the current vaccines causing women to get weird periods, even some 80 year olds started getting their periods, which I don’t think means they are fertile, and may just mean they are bleeding from their cunts….but yeah…if the whole mass sterilization side effect is actually fact, only time will tell, we may be in our last generation of MILFS….new babies will be made in labs and raised in the institution…families won’t exist but maybe we’ll get to still have unprotected sex like champions knowing there will be no unwanted pregnancy…CUM IN EVERYONE….get that VACCINE so you can CUM in everyone….unless of course it makes your dick fall off…

I mean who knows what’s going to happen, but there is a chance that the idea of MOMS posting nudes to get some sexual attention because their husbands want nothing to do with them thanks to seeing a BABY THEY LOVE CLIMB out of their cunts, coupled with low testosterone, using the MILF thing to find a group of people not repulsed by that ALIEN concept of babies growing in the motherfucking women, who may not have moms of their own and love the maternal energy, or maybe just like fisting an unresistant vagina….who knows…these are MILFS….look at them hopw they want to be looked at…SEXUALIZE THEM like they want to be sexualized…

(more…)

Posted in:Milf

2021

Aug

Wet Anne Winters of the Day

No Comments »

Anne Winters is some hot skinny blonde 27 year old actress who has won a Daytime Emmy, which is apparently still an actual Emmy, they just like to segregate the Emmy’s based on time of day the TV show airs, because you can’t have those heathen daytime actors, like SOAP STARS, pollute the talent poll of the nighttime sitcom, that’d be OUTRAGEOUS…you need to give those Daytime TV people something to strive for, maybe one day their fake Emmy will become a real Emmy, if only they get cast on an EVA LONGORIA or ELLEN backed show….

She’s also one of the girls in 13 Reasons Why….which was a show that sensationalized suicide for young people, because the girl who killed herself made a tape for all the people who drove her to suicide, you know…the ultimate revenge…which in real life would likely never happen because if someone is dumb enough to kill themselves because of other people, maybe those people would be more on the “survival of the fittest and that shit is weak”…I saw the series, but I love the 25 year old playing high school kids shows to see how stupid they are making the next generation that watch that shit passively when taking selfies…

Anyway, Anne Winters made a decision to kill it on instagram, knowing she had some fame, but needed more fame, and fame comes to those who get half naked on the internet…she was probably like “I can take slutty pics half naked, I am fit, I am hot, let’s do this”…and she’s done it.

I don’t use social media, it’s the garbage that is destroying society, but when I check her feed for content to post, there’s ENDLESS supply of photoshoots with her half naked…and this is a taste of that…

I mean if you have to make yourself into a Glamour Model to become an hireable actor in this weird fucking world, it makes for good times for the people like us, who are into Glamour models and the reduction of all women to their sex appeal….only for them to cry feminism and down with the patriarchy….while FEEDING the people they would call misogynists for objectifying them…because it’s all bullshit, they just want likes and follows and run with whatever strategy that works…TITS getting HITS…

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Anne Winters

2021

Aug

Hailey Clauson Cleavage of the Day

No Comments »

I used to shit on Hailey Clauson, despite her big hipster tits, that have since gone mainstream, but at the time I used to shit on Hailey Clauson, her tits were hipster….and the reason I’d shit on her is because when she was underage, she got some corporate job for Urban Outfitters, doing some campaign for them, which in and of itself is pretty creepy, you know get a bunch of 16 year olds half naked and humping motorcycles, but her father was on set and together they decided they’d use this opportunity to get fucking paid…so girl sued her client….and settled for what I’ll assume is a lot of fucking money…she was asking for 28 million dollars…so she probably got some lifehanging settlement….

I wasn’t siding with Urban Outfitters for being creepers who deserved to be sued, fuck the corporations and their money grubbing, give the girl what she deserves, I was just amazed that she didn’t get black listed by the industry for doing that…but instead she has been able to work consistently….

In 2014 she made the switch from hipster fashion model, to mainsteram model with Sports Illustrated, probably Victoria’s Secret, and it’s been good and throughout it all, she’s had big tits…

So I got nothing but good things to say about Hailey Clauson….because tits but I will look at her tits.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Hailey Clauson

2021

Aug

Helen Hunt Tits of the Day

No Comments »

When I clicked the link that read “Helen Hunt Tits” I was not expecting to see Helen Hunt’s actual tits…I am still shocked…

This is from some show she’s on called Blindspotting, which has the compelling premise of:

“As Miles, Ashley’s partner of 12 years and father of their son, is suddenly incarcerated, she is left to navigate a chaotic and humorous existential crisis when she’s forced to move in with Miles’ mother and half-sister….and in episode 8…Helen Hunt will flash her tits”….

I am not one who jerked off to Mad About You, but I didn’t have cable in the 90s, so I watched all the hot sitcoms of the time when I wasn’t eating stripper pussy at the grossest stripclub down the street from my apartment….it was the shit that will cause my throat cancer….the pussy eating…not Helen Hunt…

When watching Mad About You, I didn’t think “let’s see Helen Hunts Tits” in any way beyond my typical and basic “I want to see all girl’s tits”…or “this would be better if that bitch was naked”….which was not quite the same level of wanting to see Jenifer Aniston’s tits….you know cuz her nipples were hard and ready to cut glass every episode….

I’ve seen Helen Hunt’s other work…like Twister…and didn’t have a hard on for her, so I don’t even know if she’s ever been naked before, but she’s flashing her tits like she’s at Mardi Gras or heading to a college girl volleyball tournament on a long bus ride, and it’s weird…but amazing….shocking even….and I never get shocked…

So maybe the future of these old bitches competing with young bitches will involve these old bitches fisting themselves in video since they’ve got the experience, the weak pelvic floor, aged.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Helen Hunt

2021

Aug

Medical Worker Monday of the Day

No Comments »

All I know about Covid is that in the beginning they played up the medical workers as heroes, the medical workers loved the hype, it fed their egos which allowed them to get on the narrative, even medical workers at dental offices and in the non COVID wards would cry about hot much stress COVID has caused for them….changing in the car before being hosed down in the backyard where they live in their fifth wheel trailer instead of in the house because they don’t want to kill the family….YOU HEARD THE STORIES…fear mongering bullshit based on fiction not fact.

That led to these medical workers, or at least some of them to see opportunity, fuck “WE CAN GET TIPPED BY PEOPLE AT HOME FOR OUR NUDES”….ride that guilt like sick opportunist fucks. I mean COVID did really launch Onlyfans to the mainstream, it became the goto money maker to people bored at home with credit cards unaware that nudes are free if you DO NOT BUY INTO IT….

So all these opportunists everywhere lying to the public to push their agenda or because they fear being cancelled, misleading people….obviously are now no longer the HEROES they were for a year, because they are pushing the mandated vaccine and the medical worker heroes are resisting, you know since it’s not approved, or since they had covid, or worked on the front lines for a year and didn’t die, so are willing to take their chances…

So no longer heroes, but still nude, and I’ll endorse that….

(more…)

Posted in:NURSES

2021

Aug

Demi Rose Nude of the Day

No Comments »

Demi Rose is a sex worker….she’s been a sex worker since before she fucking started the whole social media thing, but thanks to the vapid and disgusting nature of social media, where it celebrates the low hanging fruit that is slutty content like it’s some big deal and not clickbait….she’s been able to get fucking paid by all kinds of people we’ll assume shit on her….what do they call it…a HUMMUS PARTY…where the influencer gets sent to an Arab country, to lay down in a luxurious setting, maybe on a billion dollar ship, and get that BUKAKE the way nature intended because that’s how sex work works…and pay goes up the more followers you have….it’s quite the achievement…

We get it, you show your monster tits and silly ass on social media, that’s all it takes for the media to call you the next Kim K….or the UK’s Kim K….but it’s too bad that we’ve been rewarding these people instead of people with actual marketable skills….it just dumbs down society and that’s too bad…but at least it does it with TITS.