DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2021

28

Jun

Ariel Winter Lubed Up of the Day

I guess Fatty Ariel Winter the Emotional Eater that no one’s really paid attention to the last year she hasn’t been on TV is realizing all the hard work and marketing money that Disney /ABC has put into her has gone to waste and the only way to get people to give a shit about her again is to show off the tits she cut off, the ass she likely got filled with fat from her stomach, cuz girls don’t need to do fitness or be healthy anymore, you can buy that shit….or use a filter to create that shit…not really that impressive at all….

What is impressive, but not really, is how she’s zooming in on her cameltoe, like she wants you all to know she’s got a cunt…and as a pussy wedgie fan, I like it….even though i am not an Ariel Winter fan, since I think she looks like a Garden Gnome, but the pussy wedgie outweighs the Garden Gnome qualities, in that I guess I should go jerk off on my neighbor’s garden gnome..to really make this moment come to completion…

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Posted in:Ariel Winter

2021

28

Jun

Alison Brie Bikini of the Day

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Alison Brie Cheese Pussy….is what I call Alison Brie….because what the fuck else am I supposed to say about Alison Brie since I don’t really think I’ve seen her in anything I’ve ever liked, I feel like that’s something I’d remember…but people are big fans of hers, including but not limited to her husband and oftentimes the guy who hires her for movies…Dave Franco…Creepy James Jr…is what I think they called him when he was coming up…

I guess she’s here soaking her pussy, we can call it a boiled Brie, maybe because she baked the brie laying out in the sun and had to cool it off, since all the crustinis dipped in the Brie Cheese Pussy started to sting…and nothing like CHLORINE to make shit right.

I don’t really know where I am going with this bikini pic from a mile away, but like Brie and the mouldy rind it comes with, in this case Dave Franco, or not, you can always appreciate middle aged tits in a bikini crying for attention while showing off her epic life as families throughout the world have gone broke in the biggest change of money to ever happen from the middle and lower class to this 1 PERCENT.

The good news is that people don’t give a fuck about celebrities anymore, because people realize they are cunty brats who are paid too much for nonsense…

BUT THEY SURE AREN’T CANCELLING THEM FAST ENOUGH….

Make them know you don’t give a fuck about them, UNFOLLOW ALL.

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Posted in:Alison Brie

2021

28

Jun

Milf Monday of the Day

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The older I get, the MILFS stay the same age, is probably not the direct quote from Dazed and Confused when the 25 year old fuck was talking about the high school girls he fucks, but it applies to this post…because I am in grandparent age so MILFS are like jailbait to me….even though they’ve been destroyed by baby making, both on a physical level and in their soul, they’re still better than a 50+ year old bitch….by far…

So when I was starting the site, MILFS were in their 30s and 40s and I thought that’s disgusting, since there are plenty of 20-29 year olds who don’t have the worst STD around, the parasite the grows in your and rips out of your cunt, only to mooch off you for life….so let’s focus on that…yet HERE we are now….

So I still don’t have a MILF fetish and I still feel the same contempt towards MILFs even though mother’s are no longer a thing, as they try to kill them off and label them birthing people for the 10 moms a year who are THEYS or TRANNIES…you know inclusivity….but I do think that the more shit in our air, water and food, the less fertile the women will be and we’re prepping for a babies made in lab future…so no MILFS anywhere…so MILFS may be a fetish then, but they aren’t now at least not to normal people, but will archive this post for when they are.

(more…)

Posted in:Milf

2021

28

Jun

Ashley Benson Titties of the Day

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Since Ashley Benson’s lesbian stint with Cara Delevingne, she’s become substantially hotter. I don’t know if they did some fecal transplants while licking each other’s asses before peeing on each other’s vagina in some masculine inspired CLIMAX…since a woman can’t orgasm on the internet without a SQUIRT…so you know it happened….

But I have done some reading on gut not gunt but gut biome and it’s pretty interesting, they call it your second brain, but it’s actually got more receptors than your first brain, even though you consider your penis your first brain, which makes sense because since it’s so small, it’s likely more substantial than your actual brain….

But yeah, GUT BIOME….where the good bacteria leads to a healthy you, and the bad bacteria leads to an inflammation filled you…and when you eat sugar, grains and dairy you feed the bad bacteria inflaming you…when you eat other shit it feeds the good bacteria making you healthier….fascinating right….

Well, even more fascinating they have found bacteria in skinny people that differ from obese people, and if you can get that skinny bacteria in your gut, you can get skinny too…since you digest based on your gut bacteria…fascinating right….

So it’s safe to say I’ve eating the shit of fat women for too long and now that Benson has eaten the shit of skinny women, she’s dropped 40 pounds, must be feeling good, cuz she’s posting hot pics of herself…and the good news is that weight loss didn’t affect the titties!

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Posted in:Ashley Benson

2021

28

Jun

Eva Amurri Bikini of the Day

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I don’t know why I like Eva Amurri, but I fucking like Eva Amurri….I think her body is fucking awesome, she’s got a good energy, her tits are amazing, and she’s in her underwear all the time, all while being some failed actress, who brought those tits to TV to either spite her mom to prove she could do it on her own…or with the help of her mom….since her mom is Susan Sarandon….

I remember her on Californication and I barely watched that show, but I did have cable I was stealing in that era..unfortunately, instead of becoming a Kate Hudson that is actually hotter than Kate Hudson, she went onto have at least 3 pussy wrecking kids…but she’s looking fucking great, almost like no pussy wrecking went on at all…I guess that’s what happens when you have that trust fund, divorce settlement, child support, so that you don’t need to waste your time working, but instead you can waste your time being hot as shit doing this….

Maybe I’m over hyping her, but I don’t think I am.

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Posted in:Eva Amurri|Eva Amurri Martino

2021

28

Jun

Halle Berry Topless of the Day

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Halle Berry is in her mid 50s, but still hot as shit, which may sound disgusting, small disgusting, and potentially be disgusting, but I’m ok with whatever’s being sold to me with her instagram content that is barely racy, but racy enough for me to see her asshole tattoo, while topless, that’s gotta be an asshole tatto…right?

Do you think it’s a dragon, or a butterfly, is it an EXIT only sign by your homophobic friend who is just THAT straight that he needs warning signs to not get fucked in the ass, cuz getting fucked in the ass torments him that much…it’s the whole jock thing…”what are you a faggot, let’s fuck him up the ass and teach him a lesson in being a faggot”….uhhhh….I don’t think it works like that..

Anyway, Halle Berry, the whitest black girl in Hollywood, who made a name for herself because she was raised in white suburbs, never met her dad, and Hollywood liked they could cast her for the black parts without having to leave their comfort zone…those racists…I mean I don’t actually know if that’s true, but that’s the angle I’ve run with all these years..WHY STOP NOW….

You’d gotta wonder why she posts slutty content for attention, when she’s already an icon, and I guess it’s because she can….or because celebrities are slutty that’s how they end up celebrities and now that they don’t have handlers…we can see the reality we already know cuz were not as dumb as our writing makes us out to be…I SWEAR!

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Posted in:Halle Berry

2021

28

Jun

Jordyn Jones Underboob of the Day

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Kalamazoo Michigan is an actual place, which I remember discovering was an actual place in my 20s, because fuck Geography and the lessons taught in school designed to make us complicit fucks who are rewarded for reciting the bullshit they teach us, that for whatever reason don’t actually involve any real life skills, or knowledge of how to survive out there in the world, but instead some revisionist history shit….like in Canada, there was a 100 year period where they were assimilating the Native Americans by taking them from their family, not letting them speak their language, abusing them…that was never taught to us…but it went on until 1996…and that’s fucking crazy…I am sure in the USA there’s plenty they didn’t teach you when training you to be good little citizens, I mean most Americans I know don’t know where Canada is on the map…so they didn’t teach you that…

Anyway, Jordyn Jones, was of white trash, possibly inbred, alcoholic, farm laboror stock…but instead of working the brothel in the family barn like she was Britney Spears, they sent her off to LA to be some bullshit child reality store dancer….and now she poses in bikinis on the beach lookin hot..

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Posted in:Jordyn Jones

2021

28

Jun

Milky Boobs Monday of the Day

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I wouldn’t say that the highlight of my weekend was seeing at least one new mother in a romper with her huge milky tits without a bra, her nipples aiming in places they probably shouldn’t with no respect to the damage of the sag since the world’s going to fucking collapse and bras are uncomfortable, do it tribal style like we used to jack off to in National Geographic…you know culturally inspiring masturbation when tits weren’t readily available to be jerked off to…

I don’t have a milky tit fetish, but assuming people will still be able to breast feed in the future thanks to all the hormones they jack us up with, this could be an archive of all things human that we no longer do…BABIES ARE MADE IN A LAB…

I do think people probably have a milky tit fetish, maybe not breast fed, maybe because the highlight of their lives were when they had a family and got to suck their wife’s tits whilst Milk Fed, before she found her high school boyfriend on FB and fucked off on you,0 maybe tits doing what they are designed to do, when we’re so used to seeing tits not doing what they are designed to do, fascinates us…who fuckign cares, they are milk filled tits doing titty things…for empowerment or some shit..

Posted in:Lactating

2021

28

Jun

Bebe Rexha Got Them Tits On of the Day

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I don’t know why Bebe Rexha is in some slutty Space Slut from the Future, who is coming to eat your ass because she hasn’t had human food in a long time, and that’s how they do it on whatever colony they’ve dropped her off at to work the fucking pole….

It’s some big titty armour that I am sure the space nerds out there can’t get enough of…you dreams of sex colonies in space have been a life long passion of yours…even though you know deep in your soul that if it actually happened, you probably wouldn’t make the cut to get on the ship to the new colony as earth was about to implode….and if you did…it’d be to be the sex worker yourself…you know…you’re not the emperor with the sex slaves…you’re the one doing the sex work…or cleaning up after feces were sprayed everywhere….space feces….from space food…all in your mop…a fetish in and of itself.

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Posted in:Bebe Rexha

2021

28

Jun

Halsey Ass in See Through Pants of the Day

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I guess Halsey hasn’t shat out her shitty child yet. but she’s still fucking white trash and disgusting, despite having a black dad and identifying as black, in this world where we have to where our race on our label like we’re at an AA meeting or porn conference so we know who’s fucking who…which as far as I’m concerned is fucking racist…

I guess she’s like all pregnant chicks….Fat….

I guess she’s also like all pregnant chicks because her hormones are all fucked up and she feels the need to show off her fat ass for the people, cuz she knows as soon as she fucking can, that baby weight is getting sucked out of her…or danced off of her…which is convenient, since I just saw her trending on twitter because her fans are pumped she releasing some fourth studio album produced by TRENT REZNER…edgy…

Halsey’s always annoyed me because I saw her as a DJ WHORE who fucked the right DJ after being in the VIP room with him and thanks to her fucking skills, the kind that would eventually get her knocked up, potentially cuz she wants the kid, or maybe cuz she can’t afford another abortion if she wants a kid….he let her lay down a vocal track and they all got rich…

I don’t hate other people’s successes, because I’ve come to terms with people being undeserving of their successes….most of the rich people I know are idiots who fell into it because they are idiots…so it’s not really a measure of much besides MONEY…but since money controls the world, I guess it matters more than being interesting, smart, hot, etc.

Point being, she pulled this whole story about being a homeless drug addict living the streets for the party, who almost got raped, any angle she could to get people talking, so posting her fat ass in sheer pantyhose is pretty on brand…

I am typically scared of asses too big, but I can handle looking at them…and so should you because you’d rather handle handling them….

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Posted in:Halsey