My friend is obsessed with tits. All her talks about is tits, tits and more fucking tits. I can’t walk down the street with him because every girl we walk by, he turns to me and asks if I like her tits, or what I think her tits would look like naked, and if I thought her tits were saggy and if he sees tits he really likes he just stops in his tracks and kinda grunts an “those tits were amazing”, and the shit never fucking ends, so I asked him to do a list of his favorite tits this year and this is what he comes up with. Pawning my work onto other people is my New Year’s Resolution. Seriously….
Scarlett Johansson Really Ain’t Much to Look At Without Those Tits
The Only Thing More Irrelevant Than Shauna Sand’s Tits is Shauna Sand
Katie Price’s Fake Tits Could Sell Bread to a Baker or Raw Fish and a Can of Gas to Huff to an Eskimo
Some X-Tina Pregnancy Tit Insanity…
Cindy Margolis Needs to Use Her Chest to Get Her Career Back on Track
Jodie Marsh’s Balloon Tits Are Fine By Me
A Braless, Lesbian Lohan is the the Only Lohan I Don’t Hate…
Co-Co’s Tits Are Just a Fucking Joke…
Paris Hilton Fakes Her Tits Like She Fakes Not Having a Herpes
Finally Something More than Just Rhianna’s Music Speaks to Me…Yes…I Sit Alone Crying as I Listen to “Living My Life”…