Desperate Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2009

07

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Cry for Attention of the Day

Lohan is really trying to stay relevant in the art and fashion scene since the mainstream celebrity scene turned its back on her when she went dyke, which the art and fashion scene gets boners for faggots, but I think it’s safe to say that if a magazine, like Muse for example, says that they are THE “Fashionart Magazine, they are obviously pretty full of shit, like Lady Gaga calling herself an artistic performer and the followers believing her bullshit, but at least they managed to trick Lohan into getting naked and sexual in this photoshoot, despite how lame of a magazine they obviously are….Lohan just doesn’t know any better…so to her this keeps her credibility and makes sense, to everyone else it’s a few years too late…

Posted in:Desperate|Lindsay Lohan|Photoshoot

2009

19

Nov

Tila Tequila is Naked on Ustream and only 1000 People Watch of the Day

10 Comments »

Internet Marketer Tila Tequila is desperate as fuck for attention because the world has caught onto the lie that has been fed to them by the media and realized she’s nothing more than a fake titty whore who was in the right place at the right time and has no business being on TV or in Movies or really to have any celebrity. She is just a bitch who played the interenet properly by getting the most myspace friends, since people on myspace approved her friend request cuz she was half naked, and when mainstream media moved onto the internet and didn’t understand the internet, they assumed she was marketable and not just a useless idiot. They thought she was the fucking internet and they made her famous…..but thankfully that came to an end and now bitch is just alone and struggling, delusional about her celebrity and fanbase.

Most importantly she is getting naked live on webcam, doing what attention craving whores do before they forget that their purpose in life is nothing more than a webcam girl pretending to pay her way through college and the funniest thing in all this is that only 1,000 people bothered watching her.

I think more people would watch me naked on cam, just proving how fucking useless and irrelevant this bitch is despite how many “Twitter” followers she “has”….I think live feed of her killing herself is going to be her grand finale….

Here is the video…

Posted in:Desperate|Naked|Tila Tequila|Ustream

2009

10

Nov

Tila Tequila in Yankee Lingerie Pics on the Only Place that Cares of the Day

7 Comments »

I am assuming Tila Tequila put these pictures up on twitter, the only place that barely cares about her because the people on the shit have nothing better to do with their time that read drivel about other people’s boring fucking lives, updated 50 fucking times a day, especially when the person you happen to be following was the original myspace fake celebrity, who the media ate up and gave a couple trashy TV shows to, because America is desperate and falling apart at the seams, but not quite as desperate as Tila Tequila because she knows no one gives a fuck about her anymore and that her ride from the top is going to be a steady fucking slope down and I’m happy about that…

With any downward spiral especially one of someone who was only famous because of her slut outfits and behvavior, this chessy trash whore is going to keep getting more and more naked, eventually ending up in porn or dead in one of her fans trunk who approached her as a “producer” interested in giving her work and her excitement that someone still cared made her forget a background check….

Here are those pics of her supporting the Yankees with her lame tits.

Posted in:Desperate|Lingerie|Tila Tequila|Twitter|Yankees

2009

16

Jul

Kristin Cavallari is Fucking Desperate of the Day

1 Comment »

I am pretty upset. My angle on this Kristin Cavallari chick was mocking the fact that she thought she was too good for The Hills after Laguna beach because she had an inflated ego and thought she’d get other work and not be typecast as the trashy rich kid on a shitty scripted show that is polluting our generation as pretty much the worst possible thing to come out of television in the history of television.

I just found out that she crawled back to MTV with her tail between her legs because she realized what a poor decision she made and is back on what we hope is the tail end of the show and since there is no future in the past and since I have no respect for girls who make these bold moves only to pathetically crawl back to the good thing they so emotionally and boldly walked away from. Not that I respect women. But you get what I mean. Cunts…

Here she is at some Malibu Beach House not wearing a bikini…but loving the attention she’s getting on her “Comeback” tour…that is almost as boring as her….

Posted in:Desperate|Kristin Cavallari

2009

29

May

Playboy is Desperate for Money of the Day

8 Comments »

I guess Playboy is struggling and in efforts to keep their advertisers coming back – they decided to get two of their hookers to eat a Quiznos sub erotically in their lingerie. I guess they are hoping the power of media will make people who watch it, get hungry and run out to the closest Quiznos to re-enact this performance on their desk at work, until the boss has to fire them, because men in women’s lingerie, sucking off a sandwich is inappropriate office behavior.

The whole thing is shameless, obvious and I am posting it because some of you like to jerk off to women and food, when I try to avoid that shit, because food is what killed my wife or at least her sex appeal.

Posted in:Desperate|Playboy

2008

15

Oct

Jennifer Aniston’s Desperate Nipple Cries For a Baby To Suck It of the Day

6 Comments »

In case you were wondering, Jennifer Aniston’s nipple is still acting up and not accepting the fact that it will never have a baby of it’s own to feed an is doing everything it can to escape her shirt and find one of her own. I guess the real fear people have about all this is that her expired maternal clock tit is going to take over her rational thought and leave her running around the streets, malls and coffee shop grabbing other people’s babies and shoving her dried up, dusty tit in their mouth, only to upset a lot of people and end up institutionalized. I guess what it all comes down to is that it’s times like these that Jennifer Aniston really regrets having those abortions when she was younger, because she didn’t want motherhood to get in the way of her career….if only you could turn back time Aniston….you know if only you knew what you know now, when you were younger, you know hindsight is 20/20….I don’t know what I’m doing. I need a fucking nap.