So Lady Gaga did a good job distracting me from her busted up weird lookin’ face in another weird costume that is probably going over well in the science fiction clubs across america, because she’s looks like a science project gone wrong, or one of the robot women they fantasize about marrying because they can be programmed to do anything. I don’t know who this bitche’s target market is, but I assume it is teenage girls, because there’s no way grown ups can stomach her garbage music, so let’s just assume a lot of 16 year old girls will finally be walking around in their panties once summer hits, trying to be just like their weak chin, permanently opened mouth idol. I’ve been waiting for this day to come pretty much all my life, so we should thank Gaga for that, once it happens, which it will.
Shit, I missed the tampon string making a quick escape, I guess it’s because I didn’t think this monkey wore tampons…because I just assumed she was the kind of guy with a penis and not a vagina…
Here are some pictures of Lady Gaga in her space age outfits that she thinks are so fucking fashionable, which makes sense, because with a face like that, the only explanation I am willing to accept is that she’s from another planet. They didn’t quite get it right when making her take on the human form, you know with the weak chin and inability to close her mouth. I am not much of a Science Fiction person, but I know you are, so maybe you should be jerking off to this post as she takes over the human race over the radio airwaves with horrible music.
Bonus – Here she is taking over the human race with her vagina….
If you’re wondering why Lady Gaga wears this outrageous hipster lookin’ outfits you’d expect to see at some electro party in a warehouse, it is because she’s not a natural beauty, in fact, she’s not even an artificial beauty, her weak chin and asymmetrical face means you need to take a whole other approach to get people to swoon over you and think you’re someone they want to associate with and Gaga does it with attitude and crazy clothes.
I also found out that Lady Gaga is a rich kid. She went to the same high school as Caroline Kennedy and the Hilton sisters, and I never bothered looking her up before because of the whole weak chin thing. I guess I should have known she came from a rich family, you know lookin’ like that and having a career, only means one thing and that thing is that there is money behind her. The only thing coming out of the middle class or lower class is hot chicks that broke free, the ugly chicks who find fame are always rich, I mean otherwise they’d be working in cubicles hating their lonely lives wishing they could find a man to knock them up or some shit.
Either way, I should have known she was a rich kid though, I mean she always pushes this fashion and art thing. She always has to say how into art and fashion and music she is to make sure we don’t forget and confuse her for some kind of popstar and for the most part that repetition usually works and when people hear her name brought up they drop useless facts in conversation like “I hear she’s into fashion and art” eventually making us all forget that she’s a little rich kid trying too hard.
She’s even labeled her shitty pop music as it’s own genre of progressive electro pop or some shit, to keep the street cred she tried so hard to maintain all those nights spent in the Lower East Side listening to the best New York Electro DJs and fully absorbing herself into their world, by learning everything she could about the fashion and art to not seem like the fucking poser she is.
Truth is that it happens all the time, the rich become the fashion/art fanatics, because the poor are too busy being poor and having jobs to pay off debt and just don’t have time to try to find something real to identify with because we are already living it and like the rich kids, hate everything about our lives, but not able to find a way out because we’re trapped, but the rich can buy vintage clothes, go out on weeknights, take art classes, go to museums and openings with with other rich people who are trying to denounce being rich kids, and who end up producing random shit all day before getting their disappointed parents to bankroll their careers and nurture their talents leading to number one selling albums, popular t-shirt lines and celebrity DJ careers.
I don’t know if that rant makes sense, but to simplify it, the hipster electro scene is made up of rich kids trying to ignore being rich by living this bohemian cocaine fueled life where they are out in clubs every night, in ratty clothes, sucking dj dick and living in artist lofts, eventually getting daddy to invest in their side projects that they ripped off from a poor person, and he agrees because they dropped out of college and he doesn’t want embarrassing kids, that will lead to getting the same street cred as the real talent in the scene they’ve attached themselves to. Not that any of that matters, it’s just fucking lame.
Here are some pictures of her somewhere recent with stupid hair:
Lady Gaga was out without pants again. I guess it’s her new fashion statement or some shit because of all the hype she got from her stunt on Leno. Maybe she’s been doing this all along and I just didn’t notice because I don’t usually keep on top of Lady Gaga clothing choices since I find her ugly, or only started to bother recently because I have no fucking standards and her ass is pretty fat making it worth making fun of, or jerking off to, depending on your taste.
I met a girl with a crazy body at the bus station the other day. We didn’t actually meet, but her ass was ridiculous in a pair of spandex pants and white gogo boots. It was pretty clear that whatever it was that she did in life, it involved stripping and that she was probably in town to make some more money than she used to in her small town where she’s from. You know, a stripper with a hustle in her step and a crazy fucking body in her spandex. The problem was that like Lady Gaga her face looked like it was mutilated by an angry exboyfriend with a shovel, and despite that not mattering all too much in my enjoyment, I knew it would make all the difference in her attempt to climb the porn industry bed post. I knew that she was going to be the bottom feeder, underpaid and doing the dirtiest fucking scenes possible and I almost felt bad for her, until reminding myself that I should never feel bad for sluts, and should get in line to take advantage of them.
Here’s a slut who thinks she’s an artist at what looks like an airport in a pair of those leather leggings all the sluts are wearing, only unlike the sluts I know, she’s got some serious Kim Kardashian fat booty and like all bitches with fat booty, she’s very popular in the hip hop clubs…..sure, I like a nice fat ass as much as a brother, but I have trouble seeing part her broken crack use lookin’ face to appreciate all her Italian family dinners gave her.
If you’re wondering what having a real fat ass….here’s a little glimpse…
Lady Gaga performed her Let’s Dance song on Leno, and being the modern artist she pretends to be, something a local stripper used to tell me she was every time I grabbed her tits for 10 dollars a song, she decided to wear a pair of pantyhose over a black/dark colored lacy thong. Well besides it reminding me of my mom getting ready to go to to a big meeting back in the 80s, I thought it was a pretty bold move. Not because it was daring and the censor’s probably should have cut it, but because she showed her world her big ol’ ass, something most girls try to hide.
Maybe she’s pulling the whole giving the audience everything angle, like that she’s opened her soul to us and invited us into her bedroom looking like my grandmother getting ready for church on a Sunday Morning in her skin toned pantyhose, maybe she’s trying to appeal to pantyhose fetishist, maybe she spilled something her her skirt that she was supposed to wear over her hose and got inspired thinking it was a sign from god, maybe it doesn’t matter why or how this happened and what matters is that she doesn’t take her own advice and just Dance, because if she danced a little more she’d probably be a whole lot better to jerk off to and whole lot less black guys would be swooning over her, because in case you didn’t know girls, black dudes swooning over you is a sure sign you gotta go on a diet because Black dudes love meaty bitches and by meaty I mean fat.
Either way, watch the video, take it in and count the days before Aguilera incorporates this into her act. Only to switch it up, she plans on showing off her pregnancy bulge from her loose cunt. True story.
