SFW Archives - Page 1084 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2015

02

Sep

Cindy Crawford in Flare Magazine of the Day

90s Supermodel Cindy Crawford is in some Canadian magazine where she’s showing off her legs, her million dollar legs, her long luxurious legs, that made her one of the most talked about models in her era, because I assume she’s trying to sell or promote some bullshit…

I like to think she’s also showing off that models, even in the 90s, used their position as models, highly coveted and fantasized about to prostitute themselves to billionaires…

Her husband is the Heir to Gerber baby food empire…who owns popular restaurants in LA…as rich people who like fucking hot girls do…

I am sure she tells people she would have fallen in love with him even if he had no money…

That’s sugar baby tactic because they know that’s impossible, the trust fund is too well managed…

Like when a dude says “I would have totally married her knowing she was going to gain 60 lbs and look like she was hit by a bus after a week out doing hard drugs everyday of her life”…They don’t mean it…it just makes us feel better about our shitty situations…

Cindy Crawford is not a shitty situation though, she’s pretty spectacular…even at 100

Posted in:Cindy Crawford|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Victoria Justice Bikini of the Day

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Victoria Justice is some aggressively marketed Disney Star, who I assume Disney released to the public as a sex symbol dudes everywhere love, it’s part of their PR vehicle behind pretty much everything they’ve created, from Britney to Lohan, to Selena..to Miley…they pretty much own everything, they have a monopoly on the media, and in having that power, they know how to market thing subtly and effectively, even young girls they’ve turned into commodities…

That said…

I don’t know if Victoria Justice is a Disney star, she may be on some other network doing the same thing…”Cast some old enough teen girl that dads will want to fuck, so that dads participate in the show with their kids, watching it and going to events and buying merch about that show”..pretty basic…

I mean if they aren’t behind her being this jailbait fantasy to middle aged men, how the fuck did her name come onto my radar…I don’t own a fucking TV…and if I did…I would never watch teen shows…so I assume it’s some kind of leak..

#illuminati…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Victoria Justice

2015

02

Sep

Lindsay Lohan’s Topless Picture of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan has falling off hard…and I wish I could catch her and taste all the horrible things she’s tainted her vagina with over the years…

She’s got this brand name…Lindsay Lohan…that no one wants much to do with, other than some instagram model campaigns, when she could have been a massive Romantic Comedy star…as we all know, that requires little to know acting skills…

So she’s been beat at her own game but Amanda Seyfried, and Anna Kendrick, and really every actor, including but not limited the guy in the local mattress store ads…because they may not have made more than her in a single pay day, but at least they get hired…

Well, she’s acting weird on instagram on a yacht… and this is the sequel to her DANCING IN BIKINI BOTTOMS VIDEO

I am a fan, a supporter, possibly still in love with everything Lohan, and by everything I mean her tits, that’s all she’s got going for her…

I believe in her comeback….I believe…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Miranda Kerr Demonstrates How To Retain the Billionaire of the Day

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DO MEDIA!!

As long as Miranda Kerr is in magazines, no matter what the magazine is, it will give said Billionaire she has trapped or is trying to trap, because she knows how to manipulate billionaires, the illusion that the people care about her, that she’s still a relevant model, hell she’s on the cover of a magazine…”my girl is on the cover of a magazine, and at my billionaire level, even if she costs 1 million a year I won’t even notice”….”take that other billionaires”….”Hey Warren Buffet is your wife on the cover of a magazine”….”what about you Bill Gates…is Melinda half naked sprreading her hooker vag out ther…Didn’t think so”…”what about you Zuckerberg…I’ve seen your creepy asian, she’s no Miranda”…

Kind of rich person thing…

Posted in:Miranda Kerr|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Monster Kardashian Round-Up of the Day

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I know we don’t care about the Kardashians and their fame whoring, but the media loves talking about them, brands love working with them, they public have turn them into this very rich and powerful…all while being tacky and trashy…expensive garbage…so as they are shoved down my throat, coming at me from every angle, a sex tape porn star that went totally wrong for us, but right for them….all of them….as they try to sell shitty product to us like the gypsy merchants they should have been…instead of this…

Well, it turns out that Kim and Bruce aren’t the only dudes who have an insane amount of plastic surgery and bad make up who dress like ladies in the Kardashian cult compound…there’s also the recently turned 18 hooker Kylie and the one we assume is from OJ named Khloe….

So here’s Khloe Kardashian Simpson…who even reformatted…is terrifying….

And the little one, who everyone was excisted about seeing turn 18, because I guess jailbait aficiandos take birth certificate dates to heart and they hold more importance than how busted and broken down said jailbait already looks…probably from a drug addiction, thanks to her parents having absolutely no soul, where that she’s just a player in their cast of trash…something she probably hates…even if the money is good…she knows, they all know, they’re fucking garbage..very very expensive garbage…and that the general public are just idiots..

That’s all I have to say about that, which as we know is way too much.

Posted in:Kardashians|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Kimberly Garner’s Ass in a Bikini of the Day

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Kimberly Garner is some reality star from the UK, who has been able to use the paparazzi to make her low level relevant..

I like to think her claim to fame was when she followed me on twitter or instagram or some shit…before realizing that I wasn’t someone she wanted as a friend because I’ve said things like :

” her Inner thighs, in all their fuzzy glory, are the gateway to her soul….a soul that she can thank for whatever successes she has….and by soul I mean her pussys…and by success I mean rich dudes willing to fuck her…”

But I guess her real claim to fame is this body…it’s like she’s a total nobody, at least in North America, but in a bikini, people care…and by people I mean perverts who like girls with bodies like this…

I mean if you’ve ever met British women, in all their brown teeth face rot, you’ll understand how this one got on TV…

To See Kimberly Garner in a Bikini… CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kimberly Garner|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Demi Lovato’s Ass in Shorts of the Day

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I assume these pictures are from a couple of days ago, and I guess like a PC back in the 90s, shit is obsolete and anyone who cares about seeing Demi Lovato in tight short shorts, has already seen Demi Lovato in short shorts, even if from an objective vantage point, there’s nothing hot about some 30 year old pop tart who creates shitty music and build like a bull dyke ready to wrestle dressed seductively, I’d be happier seeing her her ill fitting jeans and flannel…you know like a farmer…probably one of the roll playing games she plays while slamming FES from that 70s show up the ass with a strap on, in what they call “Migrant Worker Misbehaving’….but as you all know, it’s not gay of you’re getting rammed up the ass my a lesbian…

That said, she’s ridiculously famous, she’s played the media so perfectly, she’s even turned her addiction, partying, lesbianism, and eating disorder into profit…

Most people I know with those things, just end up like Lindsay Lohan…aka dead.

Now I must pollute you with her songs…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Demi Lovato|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Kayley Cuoco Tits in a Bikini of the Day

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Kayley Cuoco is not only going to be worth over 100 million dollars thanks to positioning herself as the accessible hot girl on a nerd based sitcom…in a world where you’d think the sitcom wouldn’t exist unless as a parody…but that apparently is still advertiser friendly and gets ratings from idiots who actually watch network TV, probably because they are over 50, or because they are in a contract with the cable company that they can’t get out of…

So as the Jennifer Aniston in her Nerd version of Freinds…with formulaic jokes and stories…she’s fucking set…

But I still think she peaked when her nude pics were leaked and she owned them…thanks to probably being behind the links…as she’s a girl with Breast implants who loves her implants so much she’s said this about her implants…

“I had no boobs! And it really was the best thing ever! I always felt ill-proportioned. My implants made me feel more confident in my body. It wasn’t about trying to be a porn star or wanting to look hot and sexy

And from my experience, any girl in love with her implants wants you to see her implants…but I’d be happier if they had more hard nipple…it’s more relevant like that.

To See Kayley Cuoco’s Big Tits Leaving the Gym CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kayley Cuoco|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Hailey Baldwin’s Ass From the Front of the Day

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Hailey Baldwin is the 19 year old daughter of weird, Christian now that he’s no longer an addict, Stephen Baldwin and some brazilian he married in the 90s….and I guess his fame whoring from suing Kevin Costner, to fighting adult stores in his home town, to tattooing Hannah Montana on him to get on Miley’s TV show that he never booked…to doing reality show after reality show…since filing for bankruptcy…

From Barney Rubble to poverty, to famewhoring daughter, who has been making the rounds, and I don’t mean with her vagina, or ass you can see from the front thanks to short shorts and the hormones in the food, but because she hangs with Kardashians and Jenners and Biebers…and her cousin Ireland and probably Taylor Swift since Taylor Swift owns everyone…even Bieber pussy due to the solidarity she has with Selena Gomez….in some weird fucking cult I don’t understand…

But who cares about that when you can see her ass from the front…in shorts…at 19 and lovely..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Hailey Baldwin|SFW

2015

02

Sep

Cameron Diaz Creepy in Love with a Clown of the Day

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It is debatable whether Cameron Diaz is one of the hottest actresses, or whether she was one of the hottest actresses…..

It is debatable whether Caameron Diaz is a talented actress, but in her defence, acting requires 90 percent ego/confidence and 10 percent ability to not think you’re an asshole playing make-belief.

But one thing that is for sure…is that this relationship with a bro, we call them cheese dicks, up on some male Avril Lavigne, was in a band for a minute in the 90s, probably one of the worst bands, that I assume is huge in South American or some reason….makes no sense….

I mean we can assume that his drop crotch pants are to house a massive penis that she is blinded by, or maybe, he’s just a master manipulator, I mean he must be for even having a record label invest in his suburban mall garbage….

But now he’s taken his brainwashing skills to a nice, lean, very successful actress, I’m talking one of the richest actresses around, and he’s tapped into her insecurities and has made her feel secure, like she can trust him old friend…

So instead of dating a dot com billionaire, or any exec, who dresses like an adult…and who isn’t using his 10 million dollar or less fortune as a door opener to her fortune….so that he can K-Fed her…only let’s be honest, K-fed had more fucking swag….

She’s married to this, and based on this pic she’s creepily smiling and obsessed with him…like a kid trying to understand a circus clown….only in this case she married him and will probably have his kids…

I don’t care when a hot girl, even when she’s old and washed up herself, marries or fucks some clown….I don’t care who or what girls in my actual life put in them….and I don’t care that this is going down…but I do find it intriguing…hilarious…awkward…confusing…but I guess it all boils down to a broken girl…with dreams of real love and a guy who sees a babe and dollar signs who accepts his Paris Hilton parasites…..in this incestuous…celebrity…mental disorder world…

Posted in:Cameron Diaz|SFW

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