SFW Archives - Page 1124 of 1171 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2015

13

Jul

Olivia Jordan is Miss USA from Oklahoma and an Blue Movie Actress of the Day

We all know two very basic things…the first is that any Pageant is a fucking scam for strippers who are too Christian to strip to try to either get a free education or get some press so that they have a long lasting career as an actor, or model, or whatever….

Normally, the Pageant girls are cheesy as fuck, not all that hot and just kind of desperate cocktail waitress types…

We also know that Hollywood is a pretty hard place to break into. If you go to LA, you’ll see amazing fucking girls everywhere you look, 99 percent of them are not working actresses or models, but rather just instagram whores who have sugar daddies, the guys who run Hollywood, and /or the occassional 1000 dollar campaign or promo model appearance…all while trying to break out…and be the star they know they are…

So it would only make sense that a girl like Olivia Jordan, who won Miss Usa las night, would move to LA to try to get famous because she knows or feels she’s a talent, hell she joined Miss USA after failing in Hollywood and won it…so she’s obviously got an ego, confidence, or delusions…and I guess it was a good strategy, because before Miss USA, her Hollywood legacy was shoving her vagina in some dude’s face….for some movie called Murder in the First…probably her only career..

So Miss USA brings the lessons to the next generation as a positive leader to the youth…that if you move to Hollywood and get a gig that requires sex and nudity, do it because you have rent to pay and when it doesn’t lead to better opportunity or jobs..join Miss USA…

I guess what I am saying is that they are all fucking hookers, actors, models, pageant girls…anyone using their bodies to get rich….and I don’t mind watching…

Posted in:Olivia Jordan|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Nicky Hilton Wedding Upskirt of the Day

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Apparently Nicky Hilton got married this past weekend, I can assume no one cared, there was no real buzz around it, because she’s always been the quiet, less interesting sister in the shadow of her evil sister Paris, but I guess that doesn’t mean she couldn’t take a lesson from her sister, in one last attempt to make some noise and say “Hey Look At Me”…since she know the wedding alone wasn’t good enough….so she flashed her panties in typical Hilton fashion…only I guess in Paris’ case,her panties are more toxic and sometimes made of labia…..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Nicky Hilton|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Ashley Tisdale is Slutty for Some Photoshoot of the DAy

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Ashley Tisdale is a girl I’ve slandered for a long time and I really had no reason for it…I guess I just feel the need to slander girls who are over-celebrated, when I don’t think they deserve to be celebrated…..like when I looked at her face years ago and saw her win a Teen Choice award or an MTV award….or maybe it was an Oscar for her great acting…and for being “the hottest girl of the year”…and I just said “attack these media lies”….you see I don’t go after big pharma, or corporations, or even Facebook for distracting and dividing us so that we don’t make progress in the world, or have the government admit to Aliens..I go after actors who I don’t find hot…but who win awards for being hot…because that’s a nobel fight worth fighting…right?

Well, it turns out that making fun of her was just a shitty, boring angle, when I should just stare at her little tits…because who cares about a bad face if the girl isn’t fat…Words of wisdom to live by…

All this to say…this is the kind of work I think all girls should partake in…

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Charlotte McKinney Going to the Gym of the Day

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Everyone’s favorite bootleg hooters girls from South Florida with the tits…was working out for the Paparazzi, because she’s at the level of famous that call the paparazzi, it’s the only way she has managed to get to this level of relevance…which is really not any level of relevance…if you ask anyone…they probably won’t know who she is…unless they are white trash who watch Dancing with the Stars…or dudes who visit sites like this…who like really big tits…tits so big that they make her garbage face disappear…

She has done very little career wise, she wasn’t a star when Dancing With the Stars Cast her, it was just part of the lie that she is probably paying someone whether through sex or through sex…to set up for her..

This set up for the paparazzi is so fucking weak, but bit tits, short shorts, lean body…bent over…works..even if Charlotte McKinney doesn’t and never has.

TO SEE THE REST CLICK HERE

Posted in:Charlotte McKinney|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Kristen Stewart Thighs for Marie Claire of the Day

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Kristen Stewart was rumored to be a lesbian, thanks to her mom saying she’s a lesbian…

I can’t imagine anyone being shocked, you know with the fact that she looks like she’d be a lesbian…but not any lesbian, the kind of lesbian who wears a strap on dick so that she can feel like she has a cock every time she grabs her crotch lesbian…that or some inbred, unshowered hick who has been fucked by her dad as it is their family tradition…which I am not sure whether the two are related or not…but let’s just assume they are….

Well, here’s her upper thigh for Marie Claire, the same upper thigh she either wraps around her bitch’s neck and/or that she uses to scissor with…because lesbians only have two moves…

Posted in:Kristen Stewart|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Tiffany Trump is the Future of the Day

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Tiffany Trump is the Trump that no one pays attention to, despite being the one who is still 21 and making noise around herself, and not just with her shitty song:

But with her Instagram modeling, that has led her to hang out with other LA rich kids, who go by the name “rich kids of instagram”….because Trumps are always classy like that…you know shameless, loud, flaunting assholes who like to brag because American Royalty is still white trash…obviously…

I always encourage the future President’s daughters to post butt shots on the internet, but I guess I encourage all girls to post butt shots on the internet, and when your mom is Marla Maples, a Gold Digger, like so many Gold Diggers before her, you’re a little more Kim Kardashian…than you are anything else..

That said, her body is good, her face mangled…a little chin implant, or maybe it is dental work, is all she needs to be the kind of girl I would pay 50 dollars to plug my skinny tea product on her social media…

All this to say, who cares about washed up Ivanka…Tiffany is the future and she’s already got the obnoxious stripper name for it…I’m in love

Posted in:SFW|Tiffany Trump

2015

13

Jul

Looking Up Demi Lovato’s Skirt of the Day

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Demi Lovato posted a couple of slutty pics to instagram…I mean they are barely slutty compared to the other things on instagram, and probably barely slutty when compared to other things Demi Lovato has done throughout her career, but probably slutty enough for anyone who thinks Demi Lovato is hot or someone who you would want to see up their skirt…

I don’t know if that is Wilmer, her boyfriend and celebrity tween de-virginizer hired by the Disney execs to break in the girl so they don’t feel so bad about it…but I do know that I’ve heard rumors that she’s a huge lesbian, which is not shocking based on the fact that she looks like a lesbian…

That’s all I have to say about that.

TO SEE SOME PICS OF HER IN A CROP TOP – GOD KNOWS WHY YOU’D WANT TO – CLICK HERE

Posted in:Demi Lovato|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Hannah Ferguson Re-Run of the Day

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These pictures of Hannah Ferguson from last summer…have made a comeback, I have no idea why, maybe it’s summer and re-run season, who fucking knows..I just know I posted them over a year ago…and I guess here they are again…

I wrote:

Hannah Ferguson is the 45 year old looking model, who I’ve been told is very nice, because I guess when you’re 45 and you’re finally making it in the world as a bikini model, you’ve seen some shit and have been through some shit and experiences that have allowed you to get to a place where people think she’s 24…

You know…one of those “if I’m really sweet and nice and fun, they won’t ask for ID, they’ll just want to take pics of me, and pretend my hard face is from sun damage, because I’m that committed to bikini modeling and my body is hot, that’s all they care about, just be pleasant, keep the smile on, don’t let them have any reason to doubt me”….

Or maybe I’m just an asshole…I mean I can assure you that she’ll think I’m an asshole..all while I think she’s got pretty great tits…

I stand by everything I said….I would like to add that I am pretty amazing, I never re-read my posts but read that and it’s on point…shit I should have a TV show or a book deal or something…what the fuck is this injustice in the workd…

And that was the re-run of the day

Posted in:Hannah Ferguson|SFW

2015

13

Jul

People are Excited by Mick Foley’s Daughter of the Day

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I have been seeing the name Noelle Foley pop up on a bunch of websites the last couple of days, because apparently she’s the “instagram” model daughter of some wrestler or wrestling legend named Mick Folley, who I guess people who like Wrestling, and used to get boners for her dad, are pretty happy to see he has a daughter they can jerk off to, so that they feel less like faggots who watch men grind each other in spandex for make-belief….

Anyway, I figured I’d do my investigative journalism and visit the girl Noelle Foley’s instagram to see just what kind of instagram model she is…

Turns our, a pretty fucking bad one, and luckily for her, she has her Dad’s fan base to make her feel relevant…and they will, because they are a simple people who just need fake blonde hair and tits to get off…that’s probably why she works in wrestling, no one else wants her….

Her pictures look like shit, she needs a photographer, or lessons in selfie, I know 18 year old girls who don’t want to be instagram models who are better than this, she looks like the kind of stripper who her wrestling groupie mom probably is, you know as wrestlers don’t really attract the babes…but they do attract the cheesy stripper implants…they go hand in hand…

That’s all I have to say about this scam garbage…

Posted in:Noelle Foley|SFW

2015

12

Jul

Verne Troyer Mini Me Drunken Fall of the Day

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I still think the best Verne Troyer moment was when he was pulling his Turkey….no…that’s not code for midget jerking off…her was actually pulling a fucking turkey..

But seeing him drunk and falling into the club owner’s arms in Miami recently is worth watching…because everyone likes a freakish dwarf with a hooker and alcohol problem in his element…because you know that he’s crawled into a girl’s pussy at least once and that in and of itself is magic…and I believe in magic…

Posted in:SFW|Verne Troyer

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