SFW Archives - Page 271 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2018

17

Dec

Bella Thorne is a Christmas Troll of the Day

I saw a ginger kid – a weird beady eyed ginger kid, dressed like Harry Potter the other day and I realized something I always knew and that being a ginger is a birth defect, or disability, or retardation. It is hard not to be terrifying when you are a ginger. The only hope is hot body, hot tits, and slutty behavior to distract us all…seriously…

Bella Thorne is lucky she’s got a hot young body she exploits like all the social media girls…cuz it makes her less creepy than that Harry Potter looking ginger with the bug eyes totally genetically fucked up I saw this weekend…you know more fuckable….

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2018

17

Dec

Emma Roberts Bikini Book Club of the Day

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Eric Roberts daughter who I actually like as an actress even though I hate all actors….especially rich kids from cone heads who aren’t heavily connected to the Industry…who don’t need to put much effort into their acting careers since acting is a joke and who can just leverage their names to get jobs….

But Emma Roberts is skinny, in a bikini, accessible hot, fashionable, cool and smart you know cuz she reads books like an 8 year old with their Harry Potter…books and bikinis a new porn site idea thanks Emma Roberts.

Posted in:Emma Roberts|SFW

2018

17

Dec

LeeAnn Rimes Tries to Make her Fake Titties Bounce of the Day

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If you’re like me, you’re addicted to this time of you, the hope and happiness, the good will towards men, the Christmas Carols to tap into that level of nostalgia and good old fashioned family values…some of the songs are by country superstar turned weird homewrecking slut LeeAnn Rimes, who may not be very Christmas in these workout pics of her making her titties bounce…but that represents all that is good with good Christian girls following temptation and turning into really rich hooker looking chicks…which is really what all women look like thanks to face injections.

The muppet is real.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:LeeAnn Rimes|SFW

2018

15

Dec

Big Ol Girl Iskra Lawrence Bikini of the Day

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Nothing says working on the weekend, using my skills to pay the bills, being addicted to this blog, like a fat chick in a bikini who I know is just a fat chick angling being fat and not actually a fat chick, because fat chicks are lazy….too lazy to whore down on social media or build a personal brand…they don’t travel to luxurious places cuz they hate themselves and the two seats they take up on the planes.

The only fat chick hyped on being a fat chick is a skinny chick who got fat to have a career cuz she’s not hot enough to be a regular model…

Fat Face like Black Face…in a bikini cashing in.

Here she is in her tight jeans

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Posted in:Iskra lawrence|SFW

2018

15

Dec

Lottie Moss Topless of the Day

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Lottie Moss on vacation in St Lucia looks nothing like her sister Kate Moss, but rides her name harder than she rides whatever dick is going to get her more attention because she is the fat ass Instagram version of Kate moss, with that doughy muppet face, documenting her rich cunt life, without actually accomplishing shit but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t matter…because the internet is a bunch of groupie fucks into following rich people being slutty…

Here she is on vacation showing off her horrible tattoos

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Posted in:Lottie Moss|SFW

2018

15

Dec

Reese Witherspoon Tight Leggings of the Day

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When a website you’ve been writing for 14 years breaks and you think you lost it all, you have to realize what is really actual important, especially this holiday time of year, and as it turns out – what is actually important – is Reese Witherspoon taking a jog..

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Posted in:Reese Witherspoon|SFW

2018

13

Dec

Kate Beckinsale’s Tongue of the Day

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Hey sick fucks. Here is Kate Beckinsale getting her tongue out there because she knows her pervert fans are so into her that it is on a weird level and in being so into her just the most insignificany thing she does makes them jack off…

From Underworld vampire nonsense to eternal life as the chick in Underworld who ages well thanks to science.

She as a 19 year old kid….which means 19 years for her Pussy to recover…so get in on it before menopause makes her gross to jack off to.

Not that you care about gross.

Posted in:Kate Beckinsale|SFW

2018

13

Dec

Lais Ribeiro Wet Bikini of the Day

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Here is a single mom who didn’t end up stripping to pay for her baby formula because she was hot. She did not end up a street Hooker in Brazil to pay the rent because she is hot. She instead became a panty model for a mall brand which is a lot like sex work for the rich, because now that she has money, her johns are higher level, deeper pocket…sex work becomes transactional relationships with rich guys who want to buy a Victoria’s Secret model.

Romance.

This is her in a bikini.

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Posted in:Lais Ribeiro|SFW

2018

13

Dec

Natalie Portman Legs for the Virgin Losers of the Day

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Natalie Portman is iconic to the virgin losers of the world…from Star Wars to Judaism…she’s an awkward maybe autistic 40 year old dudes dream…the kind of guy who jacks off to Star Wars…and who goes nutty over her Black Swan lesbian shit…cuz it’s juat too intense for them…who still like her at 40 and who see her legs on tv…because they still have tv…and the use the opportunity to put a fresh coat of sperm on their Natalie Portman statue made of sperm these dudes make…it’s a thing.

Posted in:Natalie Portman|SFW

2018

12

Dec

Slutty Christina Aguilera of the Day

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Christina Aguilera brought out the goods to remind you that 40 years old is pretty fucking old, but not too old to be slutty on Instagram because she’s Christina Aguilera and she is at the level of fame that is untouchable, which is probably why she’s allowed herself to get fat, it’s the marriage syndrome the celeb edition, you eventually give up on everything because you can. The people are trapped! If you are fans of her and her fat tits cuz she was the hotter pop star, early slutty, and we support her for that.

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Posted in:Christina Aguilera|SFW

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