2009
04
May
Vanessa Hudgens was out in shorts. Rumor (willis) is that Zac Effron picked them out for her while he was buying himself ladies underwear because he prefers how they don’t bunch up in his jeans while making him look and feel prettier than ever. You know as a thank you for being such a good cover for his homosexuality.
Posted in:Shorts|Vanessa Hudgens
2009
20
Apr
I uploaded a ton of Elle Macpherson pics last week, I have no idea why, but I do know that I didn’t post them. I guess I was giving a little love back to the girl who introduced the SI Swimsuit edition to my masturbation, not that I get down like that anymore, but it was the 80s and porn access was limited, espectially when you live with psycho Christians who would strip search you everytime you came home, because they thought you were up to no good, and molesters for the sake of Jesus, not that it matters, I don’t need to air out my dirty laundry with you, even though I have a lot of it, but that’s just because my wife is a lazy cunt who doesn’t know how to be a fucking wife, but she does know how to eat a hot dog and not in the good kind of way, but in the obese all you can eat buffet kind of way.
HERE SHE IS RIDING A BIKE…..
BONUS – SOME PICTURES OF HER IN A SEE THROUGH DRESS THAT ISN”T SEE THROUGH AT ALL
Here’s that 1989 SI Shoot – I Fell in Love With…In Hindsight, She’s Got Shoulders Only a Gay Guy Could Love….But I was an immigrant, had lower standards, was hornier and 19.
Posted in:Elle Macpherson|See Through|Shorts|Vacation
2009
17
Apr
If you’ve been wondering about what Haylie Duff’s been up to and god fucking knows why you would be wondering anything like that, because she’s just Hilary Duff’s ugly latch-on older sister, who hasn’t done much and if she has even done anything, it’s all been handouts from her successful human lookin’ sister.
I guess the funny thing in all this is that Haylie doesn’t really know her place in the world, it’s like the older sister is supposed to be the one guiding the younger one, that is how nature wanted it to be, and there’s that cloud lurking over her head knowing that she isn’t as pretty, talented, smart as her little sister, and has to be reminded everyday that her parents got it right the second time around, and that she was just batting practice that should have ended up on the abortion clinic floor.
So I hear whenever these thoughts take over, she heads out to the stable to visit the only thing she can really relate to because her family let her down, but her horses are always there to remind her of where she came from.
Posted in:Barn|Farm|Haylie Duff|Shorts|Stable
2009
30
Mar
Vanessa Hudgens was wearing shorts, when fans started throwing Q-Tips at them, only to have one land in her hair. My god. The scandal. This is such a big fucking deal, it’s like the time I took a shit and saw a condom floating in the toilet. I couldn’t figure out if it was something I ate, or something that was left behind after getting a little too carried away with that tranny prositute, or maybe it was just something that was “floating” around in the toilet before I ended up on it. I mean, maybe my condom story is a little worse, because of that whole AIDS thing, and this Q-Tip is some candy-coated Hollywood bullshit, but that doesn’t change the fact that I wouldn’t use a condom with Hudgens, or Effron for that matter. Not because I’m gay, but because he is….
Posted in:Hair|Legs|Q-Tip|Shorts|Vanessa Hudgens
2009
27
Mar
Megan Fox was out wearing shorts the other day and virgins everywhere got excited about the shit because they think she’s the hottest piece of ass in Hollywood. They think she’s got it all going on especially since she was in their favorite movie of all time, the Transformers, shit, they were waiting for that movie to come out since the 80s and it finally did, and this whore was in it, it’s like they were meant to be, at least that’s how it plays out in their fantasies, when they save her from world domination in some spacesuit they invented in their mom’s basement, because of those tits, just look at those tits….
I don’t mean to objectify the girl of your dreams but I just can’t help it, all girls are just a series of vaginas and breasts and assholes, but I don’t know what it is about Megan Fox that I just can’t get into, I think I’m the kind of guy who can’t find a bitch hot when I find out just how fucking retarded she is, and I just can’t respect anyone who fucks Brian Austin Green and I feel bad for the virgins out there who are or who have ever been envious of that motherfucker, but not as disappointed as I feel for the pussy he feeds his dick to.
2009
24
Mar
Everyone is freaking out about Hayden Panettiere’s haircut, you know cuz it’s short and closer to the brush cut she had when she didn’t pretend to be a girl and embraced her penis…I just wanted to say that I am not one of those people.
Posted in:Haircut|Hayden Panettiere|Shorts
2009
20
Mar
Fergie got married and now she’s a whole new person. She’s got different color hair, she dresses pretty conservative like a mom and I am not just saying that because her uterus seems to be busting out of the front of her shorts.
To think that a girl who used to miss her period for months at a time because of all the hard drug use, partying, malnourishment and random sex with HPV when she fell from her Disney channel big break, could manage to salvage the broken pieces and put it all together.
Maybe there’s hope for all of us. Fergie is inspiring.
2009
16
Mar
I used to hate fat chicks because I married one and she turns me off, and despite Jessica Simpson being obese in the entertainment world, she’s really not that bad. She’s got the body a black man would eat the fuck up, but since Bitch is into Country music, that will never happen for my brothers out there, because once you get 10 feet away from the bitch, you get a burlap sack thrown over your mother fuckin’ head and hog tied like it was the county fair, before being hooked up to the back of a pick-up and driven around the block. True story.
Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Shorts
2009
10
Mar
Jordan rocked a bunch of towels the other day at the beach. I thought that it had something to do with her body being sloppy, saggy and scarred up. Maybe it had to do with her being insecure about her tits since they aren’t as big as they once were, I mean who the fuck knows what the fuck goes through a woman like Jordan’s mind, other than the complex thought of how to use her tits to peddle more product and make more money because she wasn’t satsified getting 10 dollars a song like the other strippers out there and I think above all it reflects how fucked our society is and what we really put importance on.
That said, here she is at a tanning salon getting a tan, because I guess her shade of orange is fading and needs to be retouched and that’s probably the real reason for the Towel Bikini….
2009
09
Mar
I like fat chicks because they are easy, you know because of all that competing with the good looking girl, that makes them willing to go above and beyond while never commanding respect, a relationship or pretty much anything but for you to pull out because her mom won’t let her get on the pill.
I don’t think Jessica Simpson is one of those kinds of fat chicks, since she’s busty and not offensively fat, but she is a budding country music star playing a barn near year and I’ve seen Brokeback Mountain, I know how that Cowboy shit works out, you know leaving you dead in NYC after a prescription drug overdose…
Here she is in concert….
Posted in:Corset|Country Music|Jessica Simpson|Shorts|Tits