DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2020

28

Jul

The Matrix Reloaded of the Day

Definitely not the MATRIX official, there’s no Keanu Reeves, plus I never saw the Matrix and have no idea if there’s some PVC Fetish gear weraing big titty slut who titty jiggles in it, I mean maybe this is more an Edward Scissor Hand moment, I don’t know…I just know it happened in a parking long at for the PVC lover out there I once got a life home with who told me all his creepy PVC fantasies and all his PVC dresses he makes the random girls he fucks wear….this is for him….for the rest of you…it’s a titty jiggle…in some Men In Black glasses…I mean so many movie references from someone who never makes movie references… it must be some illuminati brainwashing shit..

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Posted in:Featured Post

2020

28

Jul

Public Flasher Tuesday of the Day

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Here’s a compilation of girls flashing in various public places because girls, at least some of them, are exhibitionist fucks who get thrills out of being naughty teases….I think it’s some primal level instinct of wanting to get pregnant….you know to keep the species alive, but I’m not a scientist, I’m just here for the tits.

I realize that some of these aren’t officially in public, some may even be old recycled shit some loser nerd uploaded to his flashing fetish site, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth taking 2 seconds of your life to appreciate the efforts…

I know flashing on a hiking trail where there’s a 5% chance of being caught is hardly that thrilling, but we get the same effect and you know maybe that’s the gateway to fisting yourself in the Frozen Turkey section of Walmart.

So this is a celebration of girls, in a time of COVID when being in public is rumored to be deadly, putting in some effort to let you know how wild and daring they are….so risking their ACTUAL lives here just to flash a camera to upload to the internet so that they KNOW it happened…or that they know people saw that it happened, it’s about the clout….

I don’t know, or really care about you, but I am all for girls being sluts, being naked, being flashers, being perverted….even when they aren’t that hot, so I figure in a time when being in public is rumored to be dangerous, and getting caught is far less likely because the level of traffic in these public places is a fraction of what it was, it’s a great opportunity for other girls to get a taste of the flashing bug…like it is it’s own kind of virus…the flasher virus…jump on the trend girls out there on the fence of flashing, but needing that extra push of other girls flashing to make you think “I can do that too”.

This kind of flashing isn’t quite as offensive as when dudes flash in public, dick out, usually in inappropriate places that can get them arrested as sex offenders…the only thing criminal about this kind of flashing is that not every girl is doing it….daily…instead they slut out in different instagram ways that are less fun…losers.

Some videos after the more….click more….MORE…

(more…)

Posted in:FLASHER

2020

28

Jul

Paris Hilton Bikini of the Day

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Paris Hilton may be an iconic figure of “famous for doing nothing” that paved the way and that could very possibly be the mastermind behind the whole Kim Kardashian empire, because I’ve met people who know Paris and despite her love for drugs, they claim she’s brilliant and if she’s brilliant, she would have seen an opportunity in her groupie, thirsty, attention seeking assistant and packaged her to be the earner so that Paris can go back to making millions doing nothing off her merchandise and off-shoot business, you know outsource the work, divert the focus from her, still get paid….but who knows…she’s blocked me on all social media without me ever even following her, so I guess I’ll never know.

What I do know is that these pics that are rumored to be shot through a Nintendo 64, but that I think may be from the Wii, or maybe even a toaster oven, have some Paris hilton ass at 40 or 42, because she’s been eating stem cells from abortions for 2 decades, some call in Andrenochrome and still looks pretty much the same as she did at 30…..

Despite being blocked by Paris Hilton and despite her being the first notably famous for just existing and despite me holding her accountable for Kim Kardashian and family’s existence, I am sure if it wasn’t her, it would have been someone else…so no hate for the “iconic” heiress…and the love she’s found with her rich boyfriend, even though dating Paris now vs then, is a bit of a table scraps situation since there are many…many younger pussies for his rich ass….but maybe love doesn’t care about younger pussy…when it’s already fucked a lot of younger pussy…and since breeding due to Paris’ ovaries are laying their last eggs so it is on the menu….

Either way, Paris Hilton ass at 40.

These photos of Paris Hilton on the beach look like they were taken on a N64 but it’s apparently her in a thong.

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Posted in:Paris Hilton

2020

28

Jul

Lucy Hale Pussy Print of the Day

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Lucy Hale has her fitness pants jacked up her pussy like all the fat pussy moms in the grocery store, not that I’d know, I gave up on that in-store experience despite it being the only contact I had with the outside world and I guess the only pussy that I’d interact with that wasn’t on a screen…I don’t miss it…and throught the quarantine, I never understood why people were so mad about being locked in, as far as I’m concerned that shit is heaven, even with the constant sounds of my fat wife eating her baked goods and constant smells radiating from a 300 pound 5 foot tall woman, because we’ve accepted and grown used to our mutual hatred of each other, the annoyance happened 20 years ago and now we just cruise in the 500 squsre foot basement apartment….but enough about my life as the brokest internet website with an email list of 150,000 people I never send emails to….you know my kind of self help starts and ends with “if you need self help, kill yourself, because trying is for fucking losers”…..

This is about Lucy Hale and the fact that I’ve been told she has herpes from a reputable source, in a “But Jesus, doesn’t every pussy in Hollywood have herpes, it’s part of being ruthless, moraless, pieces of shit who are just trying to get ahead and are willing to fuck to make it happen”…I mean she’s had at least 3 CW shows since Pretty Little Liars, the show that made her, ended…she’s obviously someone they like to sell, or they like to hire….herpes and all…herpes that aren’t bleeding through these pants because they have VALTREX and other anti-virals for that…you know so she can live like the non-herpe normals and not fear hopping in the ocean during an outbreak…THE STING…..THE STING…..

All this to say, she may not have herpes, but she does like jacking her pants up in her, I bet she can cum like that if she walks enough steps…it’s just physics really…I knew a girl in High School who’d cum in class on Command by just crossing her legs…LEGENDS and that bitch wasn’t even a Hollywood actress trying to impress people, she was just a victim of abuse and the only release that made her life worth living was the orgasm….a primitive and far funnier form of cutting, especially when she’s soak the seat….

MORE PICS OF LUCY HALE’S PUSSY PRINT CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Lucy Hale

2020

28

Jul

Lily Allen Bikini of the Day

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Unfortunately Lily Allen didn’t die in Childbirth and has managed to continue living…because even when she at her hottest in her career with her lame songs that we only knew of because she had rich paretns who basically paid for her celebrity….she wasn’t hot.

So now that she’s bred and I guess found a way to manage her over-eating disorder, because she was fat….she’s figured out that bikini pics get good conversion and when you’re the kind of narcissist rich kid who thinks you deserve to be a popstar and force your parents to buy you a record deal…shoving her singing down our throats….you’re the kind of narcissist who likes getting that dopamine release, or mini orgasm from likes and follows on social media….and bikini pics is the easiest way to do that, I mean besides posting up pics of her post pregnancy mom asshole that we can assume is riddled with sentinel piles…which makes sense or seems fitting since she looks like a sentinel pile…RIGHT?!

Here is the nipple shot

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Posted in:Lily Allen

2020

28

Jul

Frida Aasen Topless of the Day

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Frida Aasen is another Scandinavia model from one of those Nordic countries where they clearly breed hot fucking women, at least I assume they all look like this because every Swedish, Norwegian, Danish (except for Nina Agdal), models are babes…it almost makes you want to move out there, in part because they didn’t make Masks mandatory, in fact Sweden didn’t even shut down business, I guess they wanted all their meatball suppliers and IKEA and VOLVO to keep trucking for their world domination…..at least in safe cars and cheap shit make it yourself furniture….not that Frida Aasen is Swedish, but I just did a post on Elsa Hosk, the hotter version of Frida Aasen and still have Sweden on the brain….while this one’s actually from Norway…same same to all you Americans who didn’t learn World Geography and don’t even know where Canada is, you’re not about to know where Scandinavia is. I have no faith in you.

Anyway, like Elsa Hosk, the ultimate in Swedish Models, this one works for Victoria’s Secret, is 25 and someone you’ll likely want to fuck.

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Posted in:Frida Aasen

2020

28

Jul

Elsa Hosk Nipples of the Day

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I may have already posted these pics of Elsa Hosk’s tits, but since she’s my favorite Victoria’s Secret model, not that that’s saying much because I generally hate everything and think it’s all just a bunch of sex worker bullshit…which it is…

But sometimes, very fucking rarely, but sometimes hot pussy slips through the cracks and manage to not be overly offensive with their narcissism and entitlement….and just role with being hot in pictures, realize it’s a lottery win and barely work and maybe even think the whole thing is a silly joke because of the way they look.

That’s not to say Elsa Hosk hasn’t let it get to her head, I’m sure she’s a horrible person, but since I don’t do social media, and haven’t seen her say or do dumb shit, I just assume she’s just living the hot life which is something you can’t hate on….cuz if you weren’t a troll fuck, you’d do the same.

What I am trying to say is that Victoria’s Secret may be going broke, but she snuck through the cracks to get that branded stamp of promo model approval so people know she’s not just an influencer faking the whole model thing, but rather legit….cuz there’s nothing worse than these people who have decided they are worth of being models and doing the instagram thing…making some money and acting like they are top models because 1,000,000 people follow them….

Elsa Hosk only made 3 obligatory “Black Lives Matter” posts so the people don’t think she’s racist, then went back to her self promotion, which I can appreciate.

Not to mention, I’m old school and like when hot pussy is brought to me from the media or brands, rather than social media and themselves self promoting…even though Elsa Hosk is killing it on social media also, I’m sure.

Point being, this 30 year old Promo Model is a babe and she’s out here hustling to get more famous…tits out….people are noticing, she’s repped by CAA and will probably hop into movies because acting is a joke and easy to fake…and we’ll have Elsa Hosk the next decade into her 40s, being that old hot mom model people seem to like jerking off to, at least based on all these 30-50 year old women in bikini selfies getting hype.

Here’s a couple pics of her face…because why not…better to fantasize about giving her a facial….since you know it’ll probably never happy, not even with a desperate street whore, even though all these girls grew up on porn and the facial is the finishing fucking move…so many girls are still so uptight about it but lucky for you, you’ve got that color printer and that laminator that allows you to cum on her face DAILY….take that ELSA HOSK…it’s called a CUM TRIBUTE – as if she didn’t know…

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Posted in:Elsa Hosk

2020

28

Jul

Carmen Electra Still Alive in a Bikini of the Day

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When you look at a Carmen Electra thirst trap because being a Playboy chick who gets naked is all she really knows, despite having a bit of a mainstream career as a host thanks to being a Playboy chick, she’s still always going to be that Playboy chick who gets naked or uses her body to get all the good things she’s done got…but that all changes when a bitch hits 40, I mean it technically changes at 30, but if you work hard enough at it, you can make it to your 40s and still be something tight bodied and worth jerking off to….

So when she produces content for the fans, who are loyal and want to see her half naked because she’s Carmen Electra, a fucking pro….and knows keep your face out of it, and really keep the body out of it too, or keep it under water so that people don’t see all the damage from being Carmen Electra…I mean can you imagine the things her pussy’s seen over the years….well traveled to say the least, her pussy like some sort of Travel Journalist at his retirement party….where they lay out all the adventures he’s been on to which he says “shit, I did all that”…

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Posted in:Carmem Electra

2020

28

Jul

Jessica Lowndes Bikini of the Day

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Jessica Lowndes is a Canadian success story in fake titties. The Vancouver born and raised actress, if you can even call her that, she dropped out of High School at 16 to move to LA to become an actress, which I guess worked out fo her because she’s done basically one TV show (90210 – The New Class) with AnaLynne McCord, which worked out to be a serious pile of shit that got rightfully cancelled, but that wasn’t enough of a pile of shit to not get this one paid because despite not working since, she’s still in LA, still living off that 90210 money…..which could very likely be more to do with her working as a prostitute in LA, where the fact she was on TV allows her to charge her clients more, not that I have any issue with prostitutes, I just have issue with prostitutes who don’t know they are prostitutes because we are all fucking prostitutes in some way or another, women are just better at it because they actually take dick in their twats for cash, where the rest of us do things we don’t really like for money.

ANYWAY….she’s real low level, but in a bikini, with her fake tits…and sometimes that’s all you really need to do.

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Posted in:Jessica Lowndes

2020

28

Jul

Sammi Hanratty Mask of the Day

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Sammi Hanratty was on Shameless for less than a season, I wouldn’t know because I only watched the first season of Shameless and started hating it because it was trying too hard to be edgy and was clearly written by nerds who moved to Hollywood to work in the entertainment industry and had zero level of edgy in them…you know the kind of pussy faking being a degenerate for the sake of writing…appropriating it if you will and basically mocking the life of a degenerate in a Hollywood way that will never get exposed because rich people playing ghetto ass poor people is accepted, as long as the rich people playing poor people are the right race, otherwise that’d be offensive…but when a motherfucker like William H Macy’s out here playing a low life drunken addict and terrible father, when in real life is buying his kid’s education and sending his wife to Jail because he’s too much of a pussy for it, it kind of makes watching the whole thing painful….then throw in Emmy Rossum, a dog shit actress who isn’t even hot, but who is also an entitled rich kid, related to VERA WANG of all people, doing her best attempt at poverty, basically mocking poverty, I get annoyed….not because I don’t grasp acting as a concept even if I think it’s lame…but because the show sucks…hire real crackheads to write it…make it legit.

HOWEVER, in an attempt to endorse or support the show’s move to drop ROSSUM, because she cried for more money despite the show basically having made her, I watched the most recent season….and it sucked but was better than previous seasons with no ROSSUM….

So what I am saying is that I have no idea who this one is because her only acting role ever was that show….and has been trying to milk that gig to increase her celebrity….at least on social media and I have no idea how that’s working out for her, but here she is with her very boring clickbait…

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Posted in:Sammi Hanratty