DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2018

31

Dec

Kendall Jenner and Kourtney Kardashian Trying Their Best of the Day

As an aspirational – New Years Resolution post – Let’s collectively hope for an end of the Kardashians in 2019.

We have made them far too much money, made them feel far too important, continue to pander to their nonsense even though we collectively hate them…in one of those why hasn’t anyone eliminated them yet…no fundamental Christian who hates all the damage they’ve done to the world through their influence….no natural disaster…like an Avalanche in this pic of them doing SNOWY bikini selfies to inspire all the snowbound sluts that snow can’t get in the way of being a whore….just own it girl…feminism yay…

They are dumb, uninspiring, garbage…and we can only hope their being the top of the celebrity ladder eventually topples over…it doesn’t make sense to me that they’ve run this scam as long as they have and had it workout….maybe it’s just jealousy since every scam I run hasn’t worked out…they are still shit though.

Here is Kourtney Kardashain giving her best

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|Kourtney Kardashian|SFW

2018

31

Dec

Lily Rose Depp Bikini Nipples of the Day

No Comments »

Lily Rose Depp is the future – and I figure New Years Eve is the key time to celebrate the future…since the future is about to slap us in the motherfucking face in a few hours…I mean I guess it is already 2019 in a bunch of places in the world now…so here’s the future is here…now…hard nippled in a bikini….rich kid in a bikini….struggling through life as a rich kid….famous by extension of her dad….

What I am trying to say is that Lily Rose Depp is 2019….

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Lily Rose Depp|SFW

2018

31

Dec

Christie Brinkley is in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Christie Brinkley is on vacation at her luxury, 10 million dollar home in Turks and Caicos where she’s brought out the bikini model body in its 60s to tell other 60 year old women that they aint shit…because when you’re Christie Brinkley and can afford a 10 million dollar home…getting some maintenance updated body and face with injections and modern advancements in technology isn’t that hard to pull off..

I am not buying that any of this is natural..but it’s still probably worth jacking off to…because let’s face it….you’ve jacked off to way worse..

Posted in:Christie Brinkley

2018

31

Dec

Nina Agdal is Topless of the Day

No Comments »

Nina Agdal is on vacation with her husband in training, who happens to be Christie Brinkley’s son, who I guess they met at some Sports Illustrated events, since Sports Illustrated is all that either of them have done, I mean besides sex with rich guys…cuz these bikini models who get a start and really only work for Sports Illustrated are almost escorts. They don’t ever really get that many paid gigs, maybe here and there and occasional campaigns to justify their existence and to make them feel like they are less whore than they are…but it is almost always just a conduit or vehicle for them to get rich dudes to knock them up and provide that rich dude life for them….pretty standard stuff and Nina Agdal is pretty old now, body still looking good enough, face still looking full retard…but the only hope for her now is to play the Girlfriend, give the Girlfriend experience to a dude with a hefty bank balance who can provide her that good life and who understands the whore that is the bikini model…cuz his old tired mom was one…..Romance.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Nina Agdal|SFW

2018

31

Dec

Nina Dobrev Tits in a Mormon Sacrifice Ritual with Julianne Hough of the Day

No Comments »

Nina Dobrev is hanging out with Julianne Hough the Mormon who was sexualized at a young age – sent off to Europe for her dance…possibly molested by her trainers and /or her gay brother who wasn’t allowed to be gay in the Mormon church so they’d make him practice on his sister….and now Nina, the Canadian immigrant, now an American Immigrant, because I guess that’s the easiest way to manipulate your way into a Green Card, is hanging with the mormon and participating in her weird Mormon sex games that John Smith the Mormon founder with 7 wives would be proud of…

This is some Sister Wife Baptism ritual in a bikini cuz they are modern…and it’s weird.

Here she is spreading her legs

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Nina Dobrev|SFW

2018

31

Dec

Salma Hayek Got Them Titties On of the Day

No Comments »

Salma Hayek may be old as fuck…but her tits are still big and that’s what people care about when it comes to Mexican imports who are stealing their jobs.

You know all that build the wall concept of fuck immigrants who sneak in and stay, who cost the governement 20 billion dollars a year, when a wall would be a one time payment of 5 billion and would keep the bad people and their drugs out….that whole propaganda machine around illegals killing and raping citizens of the country…even though they are often times illegals who flew in via airplane and not walking across any wall….like the recent one of the Jamaican illegal who did some shit…dude didn’t cross any walls to get to America….

All this to say, none of this applies to tits…cuz we’re all like “BRING IN MORE TITS FROM ANYWHERE YOU CAN CUZ WE DON’T HAVE ENOUGH TITS HERE”….since we all love tits…so all that ILLEGALS shit only applies to the uglies…the way it is meant to be.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Salma Hayek|SFW

2018

31

Dec

Tallulah Willis Pussy Dance of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t know about you – but all that arguing as the whether Die Hard was a Christmas Movie or not – has forced me to watch Bruce Willis’ daughter dancing it out a week after the fact in her bikini being a weirdo – because when you’re a rich kid…being a weirdo is all you’ve got to find a sense of self…and the good news is that there are no consequences for her actions cuz she’s a Willis motherfuckers…so she can just keep doing whatever it is she does…which I think is just posting random content with lesbian nudist undertones on her social media feed during her perpetual vacation that is her life….cuz Daddy Died Hard for Christmas all those years ago and has been a serious fucking earner ever since….plus there’s her stepdaddy dot com billionaire who probably had her throw some money into his funding of all kinds of apps when apps were a thing and people could become billionaires overnight…none of those people were me…imagine that..being on the internet with a website since 2004 and not coming up with an app or money making scheme during all that time…I mean the real loser is the one writing this….about the real winner which is this bikini girl….who doesn’t need to be a winner cuz she was born already won….

The takeaway from all this is that she’s skinny with some titties in a bikini with a fat ass that has no cellulite…I’m into it.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:SFW|Tallulah Willis

2018

31

Dec

Sarah Hyland Titty Grab of the Day

No Comments »

Sarah Hyland and her double Kidney Transplant…has embraced life in all it’s Glory…where instead of having any reservations or insecurities or anger issues…she’s decided to really live…cuz life is short…so fucking live….and she does that the way all the other girls on the social media are doing that and that is by getting half naked and slutty….it’s this grey area porno where people are posting shit that is as close to NSFW as it can get….while being quirky weirdo mainstream celebs…making it far less pornographic than it is….

The whole thing is very weird….

Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2018

31

Dec

Nikki Valentina Rose Clown Tits of the Day

No Comments »

I have never heard of Nikki Valentina Rose….but now I have…

She’s got the body of someone with some really fucked up body dysmorphia…trying to fill some kind of void….looking really fucking disgusting but thinking she looks awesome…because that is how crazy works…when the implants get to be this size for attention and to get noticed…they are nothing short of amazing.

This is severe body modification….like some real fucking deep rooted issues exist in each of these implants and I find that all so much amazing….because broken women who live their lives like this…trying to accomplish whatever they can by having stupid fucking implants…on another level of stupid fucking implants…that make you wonder if she thought this one through at all…and she probably didn’t…making it even better..

Nikki Valentina for President…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Nikki Valentina Rose

2018

31

Dec

Iggy Azalea Slutty as Her Dancer Dies in the Background of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t give a fuck about Iggy Azalea. I don’t find her interesting, compelling, hot….I find her career a lie, a joke, a scam really….flimsy at best. She saw an opportunity and ran with it and that opportunity involved getting a jacked up face and ass injections after sucking all the fat out of her stomach to give her a more hourglass body…forgetting that she’s middle class white suburban from Australia…and speaking with a fake ghetto drawl like she’s some hood bitch…it’s comedy…but not as comedic as her continuing to dance, shaking that fat ass, while her back-up dancer died on stage next to her….

There’s a fetish in this for sure.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Iggy Azalea|SFW