DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

20

Jul

Pregnant Jessica Alba in a Bikini of the Day

I wonder if you knocked up or seemingly knocked up Jessica Alba and built a billion dollar company off her back, would you insist on a paternity test to make sure that her cheating vagina, because she’s ultimately hollywood obsessed and there is no way she doesn’t bang other celebrities, producers, or directors….at least according to my friend…who seems to know all about these things…like a Asspergers when it comes to celebrity cunt….

Or do you just accept the little white jewish looking kid as your own….

I mean I know none of those questions matter and you just focus on the breast feeding…a mom of three addicted to breeding…maybe she can’t abort…who cares…she doesn’t look so bad…I’m into it…

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Karlie Kloss in a Swimsuit of the Day

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Taylor Swift’s real life Barbie Doll that she plays with on the regular…Karlie Kloss…is on the beach in Miami because it is Swim Week…

The only thing interesting about her is that she was sold by Victoria’s Secret to Taylor Swift in some marketing endorsement deal that helped increase her profile as a promo model, from being a fashion model, because she’s tall as fuck…but also boring as fuck…

I don’t understand how she made it as a Lingerie or Swim model, she’s long and tall, sure, but that’s not what I want in my lingerie or swim models….it’s just weird looking…

I guess the only thing interesting about this is that Taylor Swift let her out of her cage to have a trip in Miami…what a nice Taylor Swift…despite being a demon from hell….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Karlie Kloss|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Christina Milian Nipple of the Day

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I don’t even know if I am looking at a nipple or not…I am just gonna assume that I am…because it makes my day feel like it has more purpose…than when I do posts that don’t involve nipple…not because I think nipples are this sacred thing or that I can even jerk off to a nipple like I was 12 years old….but because I figure looking at a picture of Christina Milian only matters with nipples…

She confuses me because she’s a one hit wonder turned knocked up sugar baby, turned credited song writer who gets paid..but still whores herself the hell out….which is so crazy….but girls are girls are girls.

Posted in:Christina Milian|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Bella Hadid Titties in Kendall Jenner Face of the Day

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Bella Hadid posted a pictures of her shoving her tit in Kendall Jenner’s face because of #illuminati.

This is how these rich girls conceptualize their world takeover and thank each other for helping each other trick the world into thinking they are relevant…because apparently they are…..

It’s a little “titties in your face, we won at life, cuz our parents are rich and our siblings paved the way for us, all thanks to your help BFF”…

Pretty garbage, but still a tits…

Posted in:Bella Hadid|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Rat Cow See Through of the Day

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Rat Cow is out there making a lot of moves in the media crying about her tits being so big that people don’t want to work with her. Stop big tit shaming. Poor victim being being alienated or oppressed because of her tits…bullshit…

She wants to say tits as much as she can because it is the only reason she matters…it’s her way of doing reminders…over and over and over…..TITS TITS TITS TITS..

Take any angle you can, the world is fucking retarded and buy into any and all nonsense because they are retards…

Posted in:Rat Cow

2017

20

Jul

Hilary Duff Does Bathing Suit Booty Stunts in Canada of the Day

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Hilary Duff is in Canada, maybe she’s filming her, maybe she’s at the family cottage in northern Ontario because her baby’s grand parents are billionaires who own the trashy nationwide furniture store, allowing for the good life up in nature, and really who cares about any of that, I’m more into her thick mom ass doing handstands and dives, like some kind of slutty circus freak, showing off the dance moves her mom made her learn as a kid before going to auditions in Hollywood…

I am a fan.

Her feet are somewhere in these videos for you real pervs…

Posted in:Hilary Duff|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Elsa Hosk is Obsess with Victoria’s Secret of the Day

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Elsa Hosk has a fucking hard on for Victoria’s Secret. All her posts are Victoria’s Secret this and Victoria’s Secret that. We get it…they gave her the stamp of approval, told her she’s good enough after she likely whined to everyone in her way, since it was a dream of hers, pictures on her vision board, something she’d fight as hard as she can fight to get in there….

I guess they probably pay her for this, or maybe she works for them for free because it gives her all kinds of other work and credibility….but before VS she was just a titty model…who got naked for editiorials for free and at 27…when Candice was pregnant, they needed a stand in and she made the cut….because it’s never too late to live your dreams or some shit….or to get in panties on the internet…

Elsa Hosk – Was at an Event in a Bra Top

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Elsa Hosk|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Alexis Ren is Seductive and has 10 Million Followers of the Day

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Alexis Ren hit 10 million followers … all she’s got going for her really…which is why she’s so fucking excited about the 10 million mark…this shit means she will continue to get paid as 10 million followers is a lot…I am sure it has a lot to do with her ridiculous body, her shameless softcore porno approach….even showing nipples last week…because people are perverts…men and women alike and they love porn…but that’s still 10 million people to potentially sell product to..and as the Kardashians have proved…big brands don’t mind endorsing porn stars if the pornstars can convert sales..

I don’t know if Alexis Ren is that person, if she has the power to make me buy lip plumper, or to jack up my face with injections to look like a muppet, in what is so fucking weird, like ugly Armenian girls making a world of white girls want to look like them…what kind of illuminati shit is that…

That’s like an obese woman telling all the skinny girls to be fat and all the skinny girls becoming fat because DONUTS are good…which I guess is also happening in society…

Weird times, but at least Alexis Ren and her jacked up tits one of her daddy’s bought her look tight bodied enough for 10 million people to love her enough to click FOLLOW…on Instagram…and app I hope dies a terrible death..

Posted in:Alexis Ren|SFW

2017

20

Jul

Wonder Woman XXX Preview of the Day

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You Gang of Herbs love the nerdy shit…all that super hero shit…the only thing that makes money in Hollywood because of Asia….like Wonder Woman…which is apparently a story of Woman Empowerment at least that’s what I saw in all the media because it was a woman directed movie about a woman to appease Hollywood’s knee jerk reaction to equality…trying to be FAIR…

NOTHING MORE EXCITING OR EMPOWERING THAN SUPER HEROS YOU CAN MASTURBATE TO…

So the good people at The good people at VIVID (who I released some porn parody clicks with HERE ) have put together what should be your favorite version of Wonder Woman…Wonder Woman XXX…..and they sent me an exclusive trailer to get you all excited…

Because the only good thing happening in Porn, is Parody….all this internet throat fucking clips is nonsense…I want the OLD TIMES BACK…and this is as close as we get…

This is some masterful work by Axel Braun the Vivid XXX Superheroes expert….

TO FIND OUT MORE…. CLICK HERE

Posted in:Videos

2017

20

Jul

Celine Dion Freaking Me Out of the Day

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Celine Dion is a Quebec / Canada success story that I am sure all the slutty french girls who have anal on the first date that doesn’t need to be a first date look to – maybe even worship – like they have some kind of shrine set up in their houses – because she is the only thing that has crawled out of the chain smoking, cheap beer drinking, poutine filled trailer park they all get teen pregnant in….

She made it…and all it took was fucking a 40 year old Lebanese man at 14….after he mortgaged his house and got a divorce for you….

It’s really the only way.

This is for vogue and it’s creepy as fuck…good way to start the day…never…

Posted in:Celine Dion|SFW