DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

22

Mar

Hilary Duff Promotes Mattresses of the Day

Hilary Duff posted this picture of her thighs on a mattress, that we can assume is reinforced to support her strong and sturdy body, that we can also assume is an ad, even though it doesn’t say it’s an ad and the FDA should fight her on this, sue her for this, misleading us like this….because she brags about how good the mattress is…tagging the mattress..but does she really believe it – or is she just a spokemodel getting paid…who knows..

What I do know is that she’s having some kind of sexual breakthrough, fucking all kinds of people pretty much publicly…multiple trips with multiple dudes and that alone makes this mattress sponsorship make more sense..

What doesn’t make sense is that there is no mention on how absorbent said mattress is when it comes to her high sex drive squirting…you know…squirt squirt…

All this to say, I appreciate her sturdiness…

Posted in:Hilary Duff|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Gwyneth Paltrow’s Bikini pic for Women’s Health of the Day

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Gwyneth Paltrow is a bikini covergirl for some Women’s Health magazine despite being 100 years old and more importantly a cunt…

She’s so detached from reality, spoiled, delusional, rich as fuck, and living her spoiled brat bubble….but at least she’s got abs…at 100 years old…while being a mom..that’s pretty good…I guess…I mean she’s also got nothing better to do with herself than eat clean and workout…especially while being LA based where the majority of these vapid cunts who think they have substance and depth…when really they are just annoying…as fuck…in their bullshit pretentious bullshit…But at least she’s got abs…

I didn’t find her hot when she was supposed to be hot…and I don’t find her hot now…but I respect a skinny bitch in an era of fat as fuck everywhere I look…

Posted in:gwyneth paltrow|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Amanda Cerny Erotica of the DAy

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Amanda Cerny was a playboy chick everyone seemed to forget was a playboy chick the second she started doing vine as the hot chick – despite not being that hot – but rather just good at simple humor with her friends she made who dominated that app with their stupidity….and now she’s an instagram star since vine is no more…and she secures brand deals – hefty brand deals that make her money…but that doesn’t mean she’s not the big tits she made money with because that’s how she got her very important start….and here she is bringing back the tits…for some shoot, whatever that may be.

These are fetish photos…

Posted in:Amanda Cerny|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Fashion Blogger Nipple Picture of the Day

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Chiara Ferragni is an overrated fashion blogger…which is basically a special kind of person who in the mid 2000s started a blog where they posted their overpriced outfits and got picked up by the fashion magazines and started to exist…because fashion magazines tried to stay relevant….and fashion brands thought they’d make the best avon ladies – selling product to their fans…making them a lot of fucking money…

So this one, made a ton of fucking money, built an empire of a silly self involved idea and is rich as fuck because of it…

Allowing her to go to Miami and get paparazzied like the low level that she is….

But it feeds her ego, so she gets in slutty poses, to try to take her shit to the next level….her narcissism needs it.

So she doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of the world, but she thinks she does and here’s her nip slip intentional for marketing purposes to propel her brand….

Posted in:TheBlondeSalad

2017

22

Mar

Joanna Krupa’s Ass…and Tits for Attention of the Day

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Joanna Krupa may be a washed up attention seeking Glamour Model who somehow got into reality TV because they needed a body…but she’s also a Polish immigrant who was able to polarize being Polish to get work back in Poland as the Polish girl who made it…which I guess allows her to get paid very little becuase Poland, but still feel relevant amongst her people…very important for an ego that has based it’s life on being hot as it nears 40….however…her body, at least based on this video is still pretty fucking hot, so whatever…I’ll keep staring if se keeps bringing it…whatever “it” may be…

Posted in:Joanna Krupa|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Constance Jablonski in a Bikini of the Day

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Constance Jablonski is one of those well known models no one actually know or cares about, but she gets fucking paid, stealing your American jobs, not interested in making America great, just leaching off the system……

Not that this shoot is for an American brand, it’s for Zara, straight from the slums of europe, which is also just stealing American dollars, but infiltrating their malls….

This isn’t really something you can jerk off to, at least not top level, but I think you have the ability jerk off anything and part of my job is throwing masturbation obstacles at you…

Posted in:Constance Jablonski|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Barbara Palvin See Through Photoshoot of the Day

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Barbara Palvin has nipples…fascinating…considering she’s a human and they all have nipples.

You perverts need to stop sexualizing women, and you need to realize that this slut shaming girls who are too hot to fuck you, is outdated and your body shaming these women who objectify themselves and get paid tens of thousands of dollars a day to be a body that sells product is not progressive at all. It is outdated thinking that goes against supporting women, or allowing them to be empowered while brands pay them a lot of money to be the body that sells product for them…not that Palvin gets that much work, she’s too big…but she is in the media in this shoot and that counts for something…only because of the nipples…..because I sexualize nipples…thanks to being a man.

Posted in:Barbara Palvin

2017

22

Mar

Bella Hadid Shows 10 Percent Maybe 15 Percent of her Tit While Selena Gomez Dances of the Day

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Overrated Bella Hadid – the model who everyone likes to work with except The Weeknd because he upgrated to a SELENA Gomez….who can be seen here with her new face that he fucks…which is substantially hotter…

While Bella Hadid posted a picture of her overpaid tranny looking face to her social media – without turning her back to what she’s got going for her – because there’s 10 – 15% of her tits….which some may find exciting…if you’re really into cleavage…like a 7 year old boy who’s never seen porn….

I guess this is her low level attention seeking, cuz she’s a basic rich girl who is randomly celebrated because her sister went VIRAL with the Kardashians and this is the trickle down effect of LAZY bookers booking…

“We can’t get a Jenner, or that other Hadid, they are too expensive, go with her straggler latch on sister, riding the coattails and taking the spilloverwork”……because we live in a world of groupies who just want to be as close to whatever is deemed the action….

Posted in:Bella Hadid|Selena Gomez|SFW

2017

22

Mar

Slutty Model Sisters Leveraging that they are Sisters to Make Their Topless Shoot Go Further of the Day

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Sarah Halpin and Joanna Halpin are sisters…who are making moves, very slowly, as models who get naked – both doing the same hustle because both come from the same household and have the same moral and value system – but who know above all and most importantly – as the Budwesier Twins and the Playboy Twins of our era….knew…that two is better than one – and when girls get naked together – while related – even if it’s not a big deal – and they aren’t eating each other out…magic gets set off in our soul….

This is as trashy as all the other TWINS….but it’s the instagram era…where the quality and posing of images is less trashy…it’s soft lit, soft focus, posted romantically but the underlying message is still the same…trash…and if this is TRASH I am happy to be both the garbage man picking it up, or the homeless man digging through it for food scraps to sustain….

Posted in:Joanna Halpin|Sarah Halpin

2017

22

Mar

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Hard Nipples in a Bikini for Love Magazine’s Spring Video of the Day

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Love Magazine had so much success with their YOUTUBE channel – that they finally decided to go POOTIE PIE…and create more hot content for YOUTUBE….fashion porn that GOOGLE can run ads on…because that’s where the eyeballs are and the idea of trying to trick people to go to your site to run ads….is a dying art…while giving into the corporate monster by giving them your content to make money off you is the only answer…or way to get famous..

So what was once a fashion magazine, is now a Youtube / Google employee…./ Instagram / Facebook Employee…because the WEB is dead….but youtube is the fucking answer….at least when they get their March “Spring Break Series” up with Alessandra Ambrosio and her big old fake tits and hard nipples..

She also did a photoshoot…for some other bullshit…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW