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2023

11

Jul

Jessica Simpon’s 43rd Birthday Selfie is Terrifying of the Day

Here’s a picture that Jessica Simpson posted called “43 and Make-Up Free” according her bullshit caption.

It’s going viral because people looking at it see that she’s got lipstick or gloss on, or maybe it’s a face filter, or maybe it’s botox, fillers and photoshop., I don’t fucking know and I don’t fucking care, I just find it scary as shit…

It looks like some medicated psychopath all bug eyed coming to eat my fucking soul and not in a way that would make me cum.

It’s like I could imagine waking up after a car accident only to be held captive by something that looks like this, you know who pulled me out of the wreckage because she’s a big fan of my writing….MISERY shit…

It’s like some horse faced lunatic on meth trying to convince me to buy a blowjob from her….because Jessica Simpson without her big tits, especially at 43 and MAKE-UP free is not a good thing…

Here she is posing slutty, still scary faced, but more tolerable…

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2023

11

Jul

Things to Wear to the Beach Tuesday of the Day

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The bathing suit is pretty much the foundation of the internet, along with hardcore free porn, but as an accessible level of easy and shameless but not overly shameless that it’s scary to produce content from basically all bitches who go on vacation, the bathing suit is responsible for social media’s success…..because every dude friended colleagues and old friends to see them half naked….not to see their shitty kids, their shitty gossip or life wins and losses they whine about….but the vacation pics…

I may be more keen on bathing suits because I live in a place where the only bathing suits I see are on fat chicks tanning because they are too old to give a shit, and not the hot chicks going to the cooler places than what I am allowed to go, where they wear those bikinis…so I turn to the internet….to celebrate the only article of clothing that matters, that inspires, that you can jerk off to knowing it’s outdoor appropriate yet still so slutty for the average chick to put on, yet they ALL put it on with ease….even the most prude bitch is totally fine slipping into a fucking g-string so long as it’s a bikini….like the fact it is a bikini makes it ok….and I’m into keeping that trend going!

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Posted in:swimsuit

2023

10

Jul

Sofia Richie Ass in a Bikini of the Day

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Sofia Richie, who is Lionel’s actual kid, unlike that faker try hard Nicole….the one he found in the dumpster….is posting up shameless bikini pics of her ass.

She recently got married to someone we can assume is a fame whore, money grubber, with some good marketing skills, or negotiation skills, able to trick rich and famous girls into marrying him so that he never has to work again….

Which means, she can post her ass in a bikini without feeling as shameless as she probably did when she immersed herself in the world of Kardashian by having sex with 50 year old Scott Disick, in efforts to launch her instagram career, when she had access to all that Lionel money from all his hit songs and really didn’t need those monsters…and could have done it without their creepy co-sign….

Point of the story, the married ass looks good…and looks even better if you stare at it while listing to Lionel love songs…..HIT MAKER!

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Posted in:Sofia Richie

2023

10

Jul

Sharon Stone Fridge Raider of the Day

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Sharon Stone is a reminder of how far we have come as a people, because it wasn’t that long ago, I mean it was about 30 years ago which is a fucking long time ago, but it doesn’t feel like that long ago, when I was pressing pause on a VHS, hoping the tracking was clear enough to see her spread legged, uncrossed leg cunt, like some kind of weird fanboy pervert….even though I wasn’t a fanboy pervert, I was just a pervert who knew that was where I could see cunt in a mainstream movie. It was progressive and look where it led us as a people…

Looking at Sharon Stone now, rocking a one-piece, not spread-legged, while making shitty art is far less fun version of the bitch, but it slooks like if you zoom in far enough, there’s some only lady fat sticking out of her swimsuit crotch that could be part of her old lady cunt, you know a little fleshy pussy fat with lost elasticity thanks to her being a senior citizen for NOSTALGIA!

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Posted in:Sharon Stone|Sharon Stone

2023

10

Jul

Milf Monday of the Day

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Here some self proclaimed MILFS trying to have a good time, or at least get a little rush of excitement in their otherwise boring and routine lives, you know raising kids can be so boring, especially when you’re a self involved modern woman who finds the whole raising kids gets in the way of the whoring.

I guess it’s safe to say that it is summer vacation and that all you MILF fuckers out there, who aren’t the acting BULL in the relationship for the cuck husband to jerk off to, but rather the person picking up the table scraps the husband left in the divorce with your mouth and fingers, you’re probably about to get two weeks of free pussy, available to fuck daily, all energized with the kids with their dad, ready to fuck you in half with their near menopausal sex drive, only to remind you how much you prefer them every second weekend….

So here are some MILFS for you MILF fuckers about to go through it this month with the MILFs who have sent their kids to camp, or to dads, or anywhere that gives them the free time to be the annoying bitches you didn’t expect them to be when you first dove into the MILF fucking life…

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Posted in:Milf

2023

10

Jul

Noah Cyrus Nude Bikini of the Day

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Noah Cyrus is like the premise of any good old fashioned incest porn in the 70s, where the sister the dad doesn’t molest because she’s less appealing, goes out into the world with a complex about how even her own dad won’t fuck her because her sister gets all his attention and semen, forcing her to take on as many dicks as she can in hopes of finding validation….

You know ugly duckling sister syndrome thanks to having Miley Cyrus as the sister she has to try to live up to, but never will, there are too few Miley’s out there, and all Noah can do is just ride the association to Miley which makes her more important than you and me, but that probably eats away at whatever is left of her everytime she says “do you know who my sister is?”…

She’s recently engaged, probably to a guy trying to get closer to Miley, or even Billy Ray, since you know he’s not there for her, she’s just the OPEN DOOR to all his dreams….

So like all recently engaged girls, she posting up half naked selfies…

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Posted in:noah cyrus

2023

10

Jul

Maria Menounos Bikini Abs of the Day

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Maria Menounos is the 45 year old bitch from Extra or Access Hollywood or Entertainment Tonight type of bullshit shows, who was smart enough to leave that shit, after decades of being jerked off to because of that shit, since men were forced to sit through that shit, while their fat wives watched that shit during dinner, only to handle that shit by staring at the Greek Goddesses tits, while knowing she does anal….GREEK SHIT (glazed with olive oil and semen)….

While Maria Menounos had some kind of cancer a while ago, she decided it was time for a geriatric pregnancy, but then got some other kind of cancer she’s either actually got, or is pretending to have, because it gets her in the media for the female hive mind to get all sad about, and I guess this is her showing off her scars and her pregnancy bump thanks to buying herself a baby via a surrogate….why put the body through nature’s birthing process when you can just pay for it and keep that pussy as pristine as it is, thanks to the whole being greek and using the asshole as primary hole…..

Anyway, as it turns out, you can jerk off to cancer, but anyone who has been to the cancer ward already knows that!

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Posted in:Maria Menounos|Maria Menounos

2023

10

Jul

Medical Worker Monday of the Day

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I like to hate on nurses who get naked on the job, mainly because I find it totally inappropriate to see a professional reduce herself to some low level stripper begging for attention on the internet, because having a professional career with a high salary isn’t enough in the “dudes jerking off to you” department, that you gotta level the fuck up….

But the truth is, I like all girls who let their true woman colors shine through, especially when they are trying to be taken seriously in their work, you know just as a reminder of “you can send a bitch to college, you can give her the right to vote, you can let her have her own opinion” but she’ll always just be a baboon walking through her tribe of baboons with her drippy, swollen baboon cunt, trying to get the best, strongest and richest baboon to cum up inside it…..to keep the baboon species going….

If you know what I mean…

I figure if I look at chicks as sluts, having them deliver from places they are no supposed to be sluts, is just that pat on my back I need to validate my opinion I didn’t need validated because I am always right…but you get what I mean….

If I was in hospital, getting enemas and whatever other treatments since I’m likely dying, I’d be right there with these medical workers, directing them, or at least expecting to be THIS kind of medical worker anyway. It’s called SEXUALIZING everything with a vagina bro…

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Posted in:NURSES

2023

10

Jul

Emily Alyn Lind Topless of the Day

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I posted the fatter Alyn Lind sister the other day, she was getting out of the pool and had some fat tits, I’d link it, but that requires effort, I’m lazy, and don’t get paid for this shit, so many you should just keep this site open so that you can click refresh over and over, documenting my work, my writing, my jokes, my everything, like a little fucking ARCHIVIST….because you know these words are meaningful historically and the AI needs a database of all my jokes so that I can keep this site going without actually being involved because it’s boring.

Anyway, like all other sisters of the more famous sister, born in the industry, and probably worked in the industry, or got worked by creeper dudes in the industry at the family parties like she was Hayden Panettiere, she’s got her shirt off…she’s edgy, she’s smoking, EVEN though smoking kills….rocking what I call the ASHTRAY pussy, since someone told me decades ago that women who smoke get grey vaginas…..and the whole thing is so artsy, so inspired, so creative, so dead in the eyes….the way you like it..

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Posted in:emily alyn lind

2023

10

Jul

Milky Boobs Monday of the Day

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I saw at least 6 different lesbian couples over the weekend….and I wasn’t out there seeking lesbian couples over the weekend….they are just a trend that is anti-humanity, because civilization requires women to get fucked in order to make babies in their womb come into existence in order to cry for attention by breast feeding in public, rather than cuddling with another woman, or having a picnic, all too romantically….at least for someone who’s only real experience in fake lesbianism has been on porn sets or at the club after too many drinks and girl wants attention…

Yes, I know lesbians can ingest sperm they buy on craigslist into their womb to make said baby, so they don’t actually need to fuck a man, but rather use a turkey baster while a they looking bitch eats her out, but that’s not really HOW we are wired, you revamping the human experience trend following fucks…

Here’s some breast feeding to get hyped on some trad wife using the milk tits to be jerked off to since it’s a thing tits do naturally…besides getting cummed on….who knew!

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Posted in:Lactating