DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

Sabrina Carpenter’s Shapewear Lets Her Down of the Day

Jay-Z’s Rihanna Gets Her Ass Rubbed Down of the Day

Diddy’s Girlfriend J.Lo Showing Thigh on TV of the Day

Iggy Azalea Titty of the Day

Chanelle Hayes Bikini tits of the Day

2016

Feb

New York Fashion Week is On of the Day

No Comments »

Like clockwork, every February, New York hosts fashion week….which is not that exciting, because Paris, London and Milan also host a fashion week….actually pretty much every single city does fashion weeks..because rich people like fashion…it gives them something to spend their money on, it gives them some material good to try to feel superior to other rich people or at least on par with other rich people…because how could they survive a life where they have last season’s outfits…

The reality is…none of this fashion shit fucking matters. It’s just noise designed to make people who pay attention feel inadequate, while making the people selling people who own closets of perfectly good clothing, the latest clothing…pretentious, over consumption, disgusting…and what better way to solidify that than to use vapid shitty models and Emily Ratajkowski at some AIDS charity event that probably costs more than it raises for AIDS..even though AIDS is a myth and not a death sentence anymore…

Garbage…I’d name them off as their levels of irrelevance…but I’m too busy laughing at Adriana Lima’s clearly photoshopped in all her VS campaigns belly….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:NYFW|SFW

2016

Feb

Dakota Johnson Panties for Marie Claire of the Day

No Comments »

Dakota Johnson is a very important actress who defied all odds of being Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith’s daughter, Antonio Banderas’ stepdaughter, Tippi Hedren’s granddaughter, enough to make her rich, and third generation vapid, self involved, “Actress”…that could have just as easily just been drug addiction, rehab stints, and jail time due to missing probation, but not that much jail time, she’s a rich kid of famous people…they don’t go to jail..

She’s managed to break down that really big wall we call the barrier of entry into Hollywood, by getting in 50 Shades of Grey, and now she’s in magazines in panties and/or lingerie perfect for Valentine’s day….romantic…

I true story of overcoming adversity….

Posted in:Dakota Johnson|SFW

2016

Feb

Nicola Griffin the 56 Year Old Bikini Model and the Other Rookies of the Day

No Comments »

I feel like Sports Illustrated Swimsuit is trolling us…

They’ve been using fat models for a while, pretending they were skinny, and now they are using Morbidly Obese models celebrating being Morbidly Obese because it is the PC generation…and body shaming is bad, even though being fat is an eating disorder, not genetics and laziness….I don’t care what these fat bitches say about genetics, they are fat and lazy, of course they’ll say that..

That said, that wasn’t enough for them, so they booked Nicola Griffin, who is 56 years old, and not Christie BRinkley 60, but granny at the bake sale 60, also fat, droopy, disgusting…but also old…and the PC police are fucking cumming themselves with all this inclusion…

I don’t love fat chicks in bikinis, we fuck them when they are drunk and same goes for Menopausal women, who hormonally, or based on their egg count, aren’t even fucking women anymore..

I don’t understand how a bathing suit special issue of a Sports Magazine for men, or sports fans, has become a shopping guide that is friendly to women, in fact, the content has become designed for women…and that’s fucking weird…

Here are some Sports Illustrated Immigrants Try to Prounouce “Rookie” of the Day, they don’t only use old an fat slobs in their shoots anymore…

Barbara Palvin, the big and tall model that was used to divert Miranda Kerr having sex with Bieber despite being married. THe brand threw the Hungarian on the “bomb”…like it was WWII…not quite a Rookie, she’s been around for a while, but thank god she got that SI Swimsuit stamp of approval..right…

Bo Krsmanovic also known as Bojana….straight from the mean streets of Belgrade….Serbia is one of my favorite countries to recruit the hottest yet down on their luck women to fuck….it is up the other Baltic countries where girls you probably jerk off to on webcam are from….

Sofia Resing straight from Brazil….amazing like the other Brazilians…..who aren’t trannies….

Posted in:Nicola Griffin|SFW

2016

Feb

Chloe Moretz Bikini Tit of the Day

No Comments »

Chloe Moretz is overrated, but she’s in a bikini laying in the grass, with her belly hanging out, which to some would be confirmation of her being overrated, but the reality is when a tit is in a bikini, battling it out with Gravity Waves in some weird “spooning” position, I can appreciate her, even if none of the movies she’s done have been interesting to me, but in her defense, I don’t care about 14 year old girls in spandex superhero outfits, it’s not really my thing…but bikinis…in selfies…I can handle…

Posted in:Bikini|Chloe Moretz

2016

Feb

Christina Aguilera’s Mom Tits in Women’s Health of the Day

No Comments »

These were released over 10 days ago…and no one fucking noticed….

Possibly because Women’s Health is a nothing magazine with zero impact on the world….or maybe Christina Aguilera is just past her prime…which you can probably make out for yourself when looking at these pictures that scream anything but health…

I remember when she was a tiny little singing machine, sure her voice was irritating, but that big voice was impression out of a little breast implanted frame, but that loses its appeal when she really looks like a 35 year old mom…she’s juste decided to say fuck it to trying to be hot and Hollywood, and just embraced “I’ll sing and be fat, because that’s what my mentors, big black women, do”….

I guess babies, quitting coke too many times, eating disorders and not working while sitting on your pile of money, makes retiring and looking like a retired momma ok…

This isn’t really my thing, mainly because there are younger hotter women….pretty much everywhere you look.

Oh and there’s a VIDEO!

Posted in:Christina Aguilera|SFW

2016

Feb

Sophie Simmons Bra Flash VS Anna Kendrick Cleavage of the Day

No Comments »

Sophie Simmons is a chubby heir to the KISS billion dollar empire, provided Gene Simmons ever dies…

She has managed to decide that despite being offered all the resources to do anything in the world, she’s chosen to be an instagram model…you know get those followers that are just spillover followers from her dad, and flash them your tits, because they’ll do anything for KISS related merch..

It’s like she was made in the testicles of their GOD and that makes her their leader…and gives her the illusion of success…it’s just weird, but I guess not as weird as her flashing her tits for no reason other than craving to be hot..

That said, here’s Anna Kendrick, who has one of the most disturbing mouths in Hollywood, but more interesting, has one of the most disturbing fan base that wants to fuck her. I find nothing appealing about her, not even the tits…If anything she just annoys me as I try to figure out why she exists, even though I don’t actually spend anytime doing that, it was a hypothetical annoyance…as none of this shit matters…

Posted in:Anna Kendrick|SFW|Sophie Simmons

2016

Feb

Kirsten Dunst Tooth of the Day

No Comments »

There was a time when Kirsten Dunst was a huge fucking deal…it was close to 20 years ago now…meaning she’s been through a lot…

From being a hot hot actress with a skinny frame and big tits that dudes everywhere wanted to fuck…

To being old and tired news…washed up and shat out by the entertainment industry by 30…..

To being admitted to rehab at least once…

All while never being to an orthodontist…

That’s not to say I don’t think her scraggle snaggle tooth is lovely, endearing, cute, beautiful, amazing….or that it doesn’t feel like home, a familiar friend I once jerked off to…

It’s just to say Hollywood is usually way more vain than this and you’d assume they would have forced her to change what has become what she is known for, a tooth, which says a lot about her career…that I guess is barely eventful…but that happened…I’ve got the DVDs somewhere to prove it.

Here she is spread legged….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kirsten Dunst|SFW

2016

Feb

Tallulah Willis Cameltoe in Fitness Gear of the Day

No Comments »

Tallulah Willis is the hipster or was the hipster Willis sister, but I guess that’s a given for an early 20s trust fund kid trying to find herself in a world where being a photographer / artist at the fashion events makes them feel like they have more substance than just the sperm and ovary that made them…

I guess she’s more into health goth now, it’s a trend the hipsters have slowly morphed into as they near 30 and quit coke.

I guess what I am trying to say is – at least she’s not Rumer, her potato headed sister..

Posted in:SFW|Tallulah Willis

2016

Feb

Ashley Benson Big Tits in a Bra of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t know what’s going on with Ashley Benson’s face, but yes, you’re a dude and you’re thinking “who’s looking at her face”…because you’re basic…

You see, because her claim is being 10-15 pounds overweight, so not that offensively fat, like a Kate Upton who’s tits you have to question when set against her massive back, in a “are these tits worth all that comes with it, maybe I’d prefer a smaller tit on a smaller body”….

Where as Benson is more the “she’s young, on a hit show, has a big following, and looks like most 20 year olds I meet in a Bar”….

But that face, there’s something weird about it, like it is elongated, or she has fillers, or is growing still…and not quite the cute face it was in Springbreakers…and I wonder how that happens…growing up, hormones, who knows…but it’s weird….but at least she still has tits to stuff into a push-up bra…and that’s all that matters.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ashley Benson|SFW

2016

Feb

Kendall Jenner Can Do It thanks to Kim K’s Tits of the Day

No Comments »

Kendall Jenner was dressed like the lesbian in the wartime “We Can Do It” campaign – featuring Geraldine Doyle – who only worked in a factory for a few weeks…because she could do it, but was more into quitting doing it to marry a dentist and have 6 kids….

The “We Can Do It” poster was designed to encourage laborers to not strike, but in the roaring 80s…it was brought back as a Feminist image for equal rights for women in the workplace….

In 2015…they have taken that imagery of “woman power”, even if it wasn’t intended as a Women’s Power campaign in the 40s when it happened, and pretty much shit on the memory and purpose of the 75 year old image, by having some vapid rich kid who has never worked a day in her life because her sister got fucked by a black dude on camera and her rich family was able to leverage that into a trainwreck with great ratings…who has only taught the young women of tomorrow that being a vapid cunt is fun, especially when you go to the cool parties and drive a Range Rover or G Wagon or Rolls Royce….and that all you have to do is pander to men using your sexuality or even fuck them on camera and the good life filled with NOT ACTUALLY working can be yours….people will just pay you to live because “we can do it”….

The plight of the feminsits of the 60s had this vision in mind when they fought their fight….they said – fuck equal pay, let’s make sluts famous for acting slutty and having no soul, no substance or values…

The whore thing is offensive..SCAB,.

Instead of doing a separate post on the source of all this evil, or at least the first of the daughters to take the hooker mother’s lead and tyrant rich bitch values, to create a clan of “real life soap opera basic america love”…shit…Kim Kardashian in a bra – with a hard nipple because she wants to be remembered…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW