DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

06

Jul

Eva Longoria’s Bikini Ass of the Day

Eva Longoria was in a bikini…and it reminded me that Eva Longoria exists..you know 30 something Mexicans who don’t look like they are 300 lbs corn tortilla addicts are an genetic glitch, some scientific advancement, or maybe it is that Eva Longoria, first generation America, over compensates as an Americam, and shits on Mexican culture, until she is asked to make statements about Mexican americans, like some kind of Figurehead or leader of a movement she knows nothing about, because she’s a fucking princess, who hires Mexicans to clean her fucking mansion…and even makes shews about the shit…

She’s so famous internationally, people fucking love her, except maybe the Jews, since she compared Trump to Hitler, and jews don’t like that, unless they are casting their next producion, in which case they don’t care, becasue Longoria fills seats…something that amazes me more than her average body…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Sarah Hyland in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Creepy Modern Family star, who looks like she’s 12, which makes those of you who jerk off to her Sex Offenders to me, because age of consent is 18, and even if she has the mental capacity of an adult, she speaks directly to the men who want to fuck young girls….like you..you fucking weirdo…

I always feel uncomfortable looking at her, but probably not as uncomfortable as the guys who actually fuck her, but I doubt they feel uncomfortable at all, like I don’t feel uncomfortable looking at this at all, it’s fair game dude, the law is on our side….she’s just been on hormone therapy to stay relevant on her show, and not old and disgusting…but more importantly, they are LA scenesters, producers and sexual deviants who she gets retraining orders from…

Meaning…Sarah Hyland looks like she’s going through puberty…at 30…and wants you to experience it too…a valuable life lesson she got from being raised by hooker Sofia Vergara…

Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Britney Spears Old Face hard Nipples of the Day

No Comments »

There’s nothing more American to a non American, than Britney Spears…

You know the white trash girl who was staged mom-ed hard…as a kid by her parents, turned into a commodity in a capitalist society…pushed to the massive corporation and sold off to produce vapid content the media loved…for many fucking years…probably a decade…before using the legal system to claim she’s not capable of handling herself so that they get to capitalize on her again..even though she’s a fucking adult…insane..

But she’s got hard nipples so who cares about any of that other bullshit…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Britney Spears|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Pretty Little Liars Do Fourth of July of the Day

No Comments »

Here’s the Pretty Little Liars on their own respective fourt of July actiivities…and the whole thing is hardly exciting, seeing as I’ve already seen the one I want to see topless, topless, while the other ones are just overrated…especailly the Canadian one….

But as a creepy motherfucker, I must maintain updates for you assholes who are the actual creepy ones who jerk off to these teen show acting 30 year olds…

I’m more interested in jerking off to vagina pics of girls from tinder…

Shay Mitchell is So Self INvolved of the Day, it happens when you’re Canadian and think you make it thanks to an insane amount of instagram followers…

A video posted by Shay Mitchell (@shaym) on Jul 4, 2015 at 1:49pm PDT

Lucy Hale is another one from the show, and she’s in a Bikini because it’s summer…and good for hits…

TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI PICS OF HER IN A BIKINI CLICK HERE

And here’s the best of the bunch, Ashley Benson, the thick one, and she’s rocking her big enough tits in a bikini, which is almost as good as when she banged Vanessa Hudgens in a pool in Spring breakers…

Posted in:Ashley Benson|Lucy Hale|SFW|Shay Mitchell

2015

06

Jul

Francia Raisa Shooting Guns and Wearing Bikinis in the Desert of the Day

No Comments »

Mexcian Francia Raisa – is actually American…and she’s tired of you categorizing her as anything but American…even though being the Hot Mexican girl worked for Alba and a few other actors…because you gotta reach that market, there are so many of them, they just keep reproducing…

Well she’s more American than all these work Visa holding, more successful actors than her….but she was on a TV show…saying my name….so I can jerk off to her pics listening to “Jesus Martinez” looping…over and over again…to her USA bikini…right…

And more importantly…she’s shooting guns and wearing USA bikinis…and there’s something very very hot about that…when you loop her saying my name over and over again..

Posted in:Francia Raisa|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Jojo Does Bathing Suits of the Day

No Comments »

Jojo’s bikini is some high waisted, crop top t-shirt….and that’s not quite revealing enough for me, but it is better than seeing her get fucked by black guys, which is what she did when her career basically disappeared…without realizing that white dudes, her audience, hate that shit…

I am against white girls getting fucked by black guys, I realize it’s a fetish, and I encourage girls I know to fuck black guys and to film it and to send me the videos…

I guess through exposure it has become a bit of a fetish….but only because it is want to incorporate into my marriage, not because I like love 14 inch black cocks, but I hate my wife, I find her disgusting and I feels like they’d fuck her because she’s white, even if they don’t want to, making her uninterested in me trying to fuck her…especially now that she knows I’m not actually impotent, that was just a lie to get her to leave me alone, a like that backfired, because she turned it into sitting on my face…horrible..

What I an trying to say is that when I see Jojo in a horrible bikini….I am reminded of my horrible life…thanks for that…

Posted in:JoJo|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Emmy Rossum in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Emmy Rossum is constantly doing nude scenes in Shameless, I assume the show is still being produced, but I don’t actually watch it…it’s not that I don’t like and can’t relate to the story, I just find it cheesy and bullshit, and more interesting if it was a real family and a real documentary on them, rather that just a bunch of faggot overpaid actors playing make-belief like they are either insane…especially since they consider it art…or childish…because that’s what little kids do…

What I am getting at is that along with acting being a joke, so is Emmy Rossum, because she’s an actor…but she makes a lot of money, which is more than we can say about me…

But this isn’t about me, it’s about Emmy, and how her bikini pics for the fourth of July don’t matter…because I’ve seen her simulate sex like she was a softcore pornstar, only in 2010s, which means it’s cable programming….

All this to say, every one taking selfies, or acting, are pretty much whores seeking attention, I just prefer when they are actual whores that I can afford to piss on their faces…cuz you know for the right amount of money…they’d all do it…

My vow to you is that when I become a dot com billionaire for the drunkenstepfather app, I will spend 10 million dollars a year to piss on celebrity faces…

Posted in:Emmy Rossum|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Charissa Thompson’s Amazing Body of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t really know who Charissa Thompson is…but wikipedia does, so I guess that means I now do too…

This is an example of the misuse of the wealth of information available to us…

It’s like, if this was two decades ago, I wouldn’t see this picture, unless it was published in a magazine, and even if it was published in a magazine, I wouldn’t know who I was looking at, I’d be like here’s some low level bikini pic of some amazing bodied 30 something girl…but I wouldn’t be able to really dig deeper into her existence with a wikipedia we can assume her hired publicist set up for he….

It’s like, why use the internet to congregate and change the world, or educate ourselves to be the smartest generation of human who really change the world…let’s use it for selfies and to look at pics of some trick who is the co-host of Extra with Mario Lopez, I guess the replacement tits for Maria Menounos, because tits get hits…pretty much the same reason I’m posting this…make me money Charissa Thompson….like the hooker you are…a hooker presented as a presenter because she went to some bullshit college class for it…fuck off…you’re on DrunkenStepfather. You’ve made it.

Posted in:Charissa Thompson|SFW

2015

06

Jul

ELsa Pataky Bikini Ass Picker of the Day

No Comments »

Elsa Pataky is old as fuck…she’s from Spain, which means she has a “Hope Solo” USA! USA! USA! pussy … because I haven’t met a Spanish girl with an inny pussy…but maybe I just hang out with moms of two or more..

Not that this is about her pussy, but rather her old as fuck ass, in a bikini, on Vacation with her green card Chris Hemsworth…who she has a dozen or more kids with…it’s a Spanish thing….and who wasn’t the first actor she burned through, and probably not her last…

I don’t think this is exciting stuff, but I figure she sued a magazine for publishing her tit pics from a paparazzi, and she won 310,000 Euros for it, meaning she either loves or hates paparazzi, as it makes her more money than her bullshit acting job, she was in the Fast and Furious movies to reach a hispanic audience…who cares… so she’s out there reaching for another win…this time about to finger her asshole invasion of privacy..who cares…I guess I do…but only because I’m in this deep so here it is…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Elsa Pataky|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Nicola Peltz in Shorts of the Day

No Comments »

Nicola Peltz is one of the more interesting daughter of a multi-billionaire, because she’s from Upstate New York rich and not from LA rich, which makes her fame whoring a lot more subtle than her LA counterparts, who she is probably friends with, as they all meet at the Wealthy Summer Parties that you assholes aren’t allowed to go to…where they wear little shorts for their fans, who are just a bunch of nerd losers who jerk off to Transformers, as that’s all she’s been in, probably because her dad is one of Michael Bay’s financiers for his shitty high budget movies, and putting his daughter in a talentless role as the hot chick, someting good for ego and business meetings at the country club conversation, is a pretty easy clause to sign off on, because she’s kind of hot..

Either way, this is like hip hop wars of the 90s, east VS west, but the only person who gets shot is all these girls, in the face by dudes they are using to cope with their daddy issues with…dudes who aren’t you or me…but you can still jerk off to her ass if you want…that’s the power of the internet.

Posted in:Nicola Peltz|SFW