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2014

27

Aug

Sofia Vergara Nipple Slip of the Day

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I saw this earlier and didn’t really care, before realizing that everyone fucking loves Sofia Vergara and I would not be doing my service to you assholes if I didn’t post it, even though we all know that showing her nipple is the least of things she’s done to be celebrating at these post-Emmy Party, while all the shameless shady things she’s done over the years to get from the ghetto to this level…make showing her nipple in a celebratory dance tame as fuck. I’m imagining cocaine bribes, blowjobs, gangbangs – maybe even her getting shit on…because hooking is how success happens for most immigrants I know…and it would only make sense if that applied to this lottery winner too….even if she wants you to think it’s all her hard work. Bullshit.

Posted in:Sofia Vergara

2014

27

Aug

Anastasia Ashley Bikini Snapshots in Ibiza for TheHeadHuntr of the Day

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My friends over at THEHEADHUNTR met up with international surf sensationand Sports Illustrated titty model – with fans everywhere because not only does she risk her life riding massive waves that make you look like a little bitch…but she’s also got a big round ass that you can appreciate even if you aren’t black…that’s why we call her An-Ass-Tasia..Ass is her name..literally.

I like to assume she’s an anal queen because when you’re built like this…you gotta use your natural abilities to their full capabilities…especially when you’re a competitive surfer who likes to win – but I guess I like to think every girl is an anal queen, because they grew up on porn, you can’t get pregnant with anal, and most importantly – it is the window into a girl’s soul…and if any girl, not just one with an amazing round surf ass didn’t use it, they’d be wasting their god given talent…

They were in Ibiza, I can only assume with Kate Moss, Liv Tyler, Miranda Kerr and Wyclef Jean…who were also in Ibiza…because why else would a surfer be in Ibiza, it’s not like people surf there…they just do hard drugs and dance…topless…

Either way, this point and shoot snapshot series…is what vacation photos are all about…if you have a tight body like this to go on vacation with. My vacation photos involve more fat wife eating obscene amounts of food – offending everyone near her….

Here’s Anastasia..

Posted in:Anastasia Ashley

2014

27

Aug

Lea Seydoux for Interview of the Day

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Lea Seydoux is a French actress from France, who has recently done this photoshoot for Interview magazine, that you know is ART because it is black and white, but that you know is disappointing because it is clothed – since just leaving your house in France leads to endless tits during the summer – I’m talking old, young, hot, scary….all topless…

Yet they get the actress who has a big movie where she’s having lesbian sex the entire time not naked…

Bummer…right…

Posted in:Léa Seydoux

2014

27

Aug

Genevieve Morton Cheesy Walmart Lookin Model of the Day

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Genevieve Morton is struggling hard to be relevant and I guess to pay her rent – because she’s working her ass off – but not literally, since she’s still fat, despite pretending she’s not..doing campaigns and photoshoots for anyone and everyone, even this shoot that looks like a cheesy as fuck Walmart brand…but that I assume pays…

I mean she’s shameless, she’s going for it, she’s getting old and hasn’t really made it yet…and I encourage her becasue it is step one of getting more and more and more naked…because every other tactic is failing…

Her only play has been Sports Illustrated – but now she’s doing this nonsense.

Here is a slutty pic she posted – where you can practically see her vagina on instagram – where slutty pics of vagina belong….she called it Part 1, I assume part 2 is when she loses weight….but or eats the bed sheets because she feels famished…

Posted in:Genevieve Morton

2014

27

Aug

Gigi Hadid Grabbing Her Tits for CR Fashion Book of the Day

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Gigi Hadid is making moves in her bullshit career, that I guess is still a career, even if it was given to her by her vain, rich, ridiculous looking father for a Christmas gift one year, because her rich ass already had a pony and modeling careers are way more in right now – it’s like a reason for her to do shoots for her instagram or some shit…

So she was sold off to Guess, because Guess are family friends….and being Guess girl led to SI, and now to this CR Fashion book where she’s hard nippled and grabbing her tits, making me wonder who got to ice her before the shoot, or if maybe her big tits just get hard naturally, ever since the implants…unless of course she doesn’t have implants…which I would doubt…because I assume they were the stocking stuffer the Christmas she got the modeling career…

These rich girl models confuse me…but they exist and I still like anyone who doesn’t need to get naked – getting naked.

Posted in:Gigi Hadid

2014

27

Aug

Sophie Tween Simmons for Galore of the Day

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My favorite magazine right now is GALORE ….

I think they are putting out some of the best stuff around, and I am not just saying that because I am friends with the person who shot this magazine, I am saying it because I genuinely think they know what’s up…and I’m not just saying it because I think Sophie Simmons, the girl you didn’t want to have sex with on the Gene Simmons Family show, because she was fat, unless you were a Gene Simmons Fan, into fucking anything that came out of his cock, even a jar of his semen, because he’s brain washed you that hard…

But I’m kinda into her leaner body, getting naughtier, posing in her panties, amongst black people…like the cream filling in an Oreo cookie that kinda makes me want to cream in her cookie….

Right?

[galore]

Posted in:Sophie Tween Simmons

2014

27

Aug

Liv Tyler Ibiza Bikini of the Day

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Liv Tyler was in Ibiza…on a yacht…because she was an unwanted rockstar daughter, who was lost, but then she was found, given tons of money to make-up for guilt and lost time, thanks to her whore groupie mom, before being sold off to modeling agencies and talent agencies to live out her dreams…because when your dad fronts Aerosmith, even if he doesn’t like the acknowlege being your dad…opportunities happen…

She’s old, I didn’t like her when she was an “it girl”…but I do think Daddy issues are cute enough for me to want to buy her used bikini on ebay, if she’s sellin’ it…

But then again, I’d buy anyone’s used bikini off ebay…if only I wasn’t broke.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Liv Tyler

2014

27

Aug

Hailey Clauson for Vogue Spain of the Day

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I’ve heard that Hailey Clauson is some fat hipster wannabe Kate Upton…that in person she’s some kind of monster, all big and scary, looking like she’s out to eat her way out of everything….but I don’t really see it….

I just see tits on a girl who had the balls to sue Urban Outfitters when she was 17 for sexualizing her, in some strategic publicity stunt that I guess worked, even though if I was a brand, I’d never hire her…she’s a liability.

She’s booked Vogue Spain, making moves and I guess a legit model…and I don’t really care because she’s not naked like she’s supposed to be…and when they aren’t naked…they don’t matter.

Posted in:Hailey Clauson

2014

27

Aug

Selena Gomez Dance Off of the Day

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Selena Gomez is dancing in a bra top, in her car, showing off her fake tits because that’s why she got them, even if they are smaller than most fake tits, they still have the same impact and effect on a girl who get’s them mind….

I have been with countless fake tit girls and all loved showing them off, letting you touch, or staging dance-offs as the new challenge to take the internet by storm…turning the entire world into one horrible high school class…filled with the famous, overly positive cheerleaders…and luckily ample autistic school shooters….

TO SEE PICS OF HER HIDING HER FACE BECAUSE SHE’S DRAMAIC CLICK HERE

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2014

27

Aug

Alena Blohm in LOU Lingerie of the Day

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Alena Blohm has ruined all the other girls for me.

I have officially broken up with all my imaginary model girlfriends, who don’t know I exist, so that I can focus my love on her.

I feel like when you see God…or the closest thing to God…you must fully commit to the cause – even if it doesn’t see you back, because the power of the universe will draw her to you…

This is the closest thing I’ve ever had to a spiritual experience, only with more half nakedness that makes me focus on her genital..and my intense interest in suffocating on them…

Serious fucking babe.

Posted in:Alena Blohm