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Dua Lipa’s Ass Walking of the Day
Dua Lipa’s Ass Walking of the Day
Jojo Drops a Shit Song of the Day
Jojo Drops a Shit Song of the Day
Kristin Cavallari Fake Titty of the Day
Kristin Cavallari Fake Titty of the Day
Jessica Alba and Other Useless Celebs Do Political Endorsements of the Day
Jessica Alba and Other Useless Celebs Do Political Endorsements of the Day
Ella Hunt’s Titties of the Day
Ella Hunt’s Titties of the Day

2014

03

Jun

Sara Malakul Lane for Galore Magazine of the Day

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Her name is SARA MALAKUL LANE . You know her because instead of becoming a child prostitute for twisted westerners in her home country of Thailand, she took the harder road…of becoming a local celebrity there, starring on some hit show called “cooking is fun”…Fame that she left behind to go to America and live the American dream, since she was American…booking a bunch of movies and being featured on this site a bunch of times…

Now, I am not sure whether getting into a bathtub I helped fill with Ramen noodles for THE HEAD HUNTR and GALORE MAGAZINE was really part of that dream, but it sure as fuck was part of my dream….I even bottled that bathtub soup and still have some in the fridge if you want some. I also have the Hello Kitty kid’s bathing suit, I like souvenirs…I’m normal like that

More importantly, I am familiar with Ramen, and on a budget, because being broke and an alcoholic comes with very complex decision making in terms of where to spend the very little money. Booze and hookers always seems to win…but hat confuses me about that though is how I am still obese …fascinating…Not that this is about me, it is about Sara Malakul Lane and how I wish she took the thai hooker route…instead of this Hollywood acting, Ramen Noodle fashion erotica route…even though it’s pretty fucking amazing…

Source GALORE MAGAZINE and THE HEAD HUNTR

Posted in:Sara Malakul Lane

2014

03

Jun

Lindsay Lohan Jogging cuz She’s a Fitness Icon of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan may be an unstable crackhead, addicted to countless pills as well as illegal drugs and alcohol…you know a walking disaster who I’ve been with at least once after she locked herself in her hotel room with her friend to “do party tricks”…before coming out and doing a dance show…

She’s a broken girl and I just don’t think she has it in her spoiled brat soul…to ever grow the fuck up, realize what she has, and focus on doing good things, producing good product, or whatever other opportunity that comes to an under 30 who looked 60 with her level of fame…

But throughout all the hard times, the emaciated half dead to the chubbier faced filled better years…she’s always been one thing to me…a fitness guru…

So seeing her post her fitness on her instagram, is just as insane as she is….and for some reason it is a fitness program I would sign up to…because I am sure it’s like a fucking horrible circus.

I am into whatever the fuck this is.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2014

03

Jun

Luci Ford is the Greatest thing I’ve Ever Seen Ever of the Day

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I am in love with LUCI FORD …I know very little about her, other than that I just followed her on Instagram, which happens to be the place I find all my girlfriends who ultimately end up blocking me because they misinterpret my love letters and requests for a date, or wedding and baby emoji’s saying that our future is so bright…as being creepy…

Girls just don’t understand true love. They all want it – in theory – but none actually embrace when someone is open enough to give it…

I have a feeling that Luci Ford is the future, I just don’t know in what, I just know that if she wears those shorts, it sure as hell better be long walks up stairs in front of me…That kind of shit is worth having a heart attack over…

All this to say, I’m in love.

Posted in:Luci Ford

2014

03

Jun

Jessica Hart for Harper’s Australia of the Day

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Jessica Hart is a busty, hot, Austrilian model gold digger who is dating, possibly engaged to Stavros, who likely has herpes from all the girl his Billionaire playboy dick has fucked…from Paris Hilton…to all the other hot famous girls he fucked…who don’t quite matter as much as Paris Hilton, since we all know she has herpes…her Valtrex was posted on the internet years ago…she has herpes…

I’ve interacted with Stavros at least once or twice. THe first was when I got his phone number from the same cellphone hack that gave us Paris Hilton’s Herpes prescription…and we texted back and forth for at least a month or two…He even got me into random parties – thinking I was some other friend of his who I guess had the same area code. It was jokes.

Then last year, I got invited by a friend, who probably shouldn’t have invited me, but invited me anyway, to his hotel room party…and Jessica Hart was no where around…in fact no girls were around…not even hookers…just a bunch of billionaire playboys from all over the world…dancing with each other to bad music…and the whole thing…was pretty fucking strange, but I was told when you’re a billionaire, and girls like Jessica Hart flock to you…you kind of want nothing to do with them in your downtime…but I do…i want everything to do with her, herpes and all…dripping off my face…after she sits on it.

Posted in:Jessica Hart

2014

03

Jun

Rihanna’s Big Ass Nipples at the CFDA Event of the Day

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I don’t’ realize why everyone is so concerned about Rihanna showing her nipples and ass crack at some CFDA event. This is not the 90s or the early 2000s at the Superbowl when Janet Jackson decided to show the world her tit to help Justin Timberlake’s solo career. This is not Lohan or Britney flashing their vaginas outside a night club when medicated….This is Rihanna. Some Bajan hooker turned popstar, who has shown her nipple and ass countless times before. Not to mention, this is the porn generation where nipples and ass aren’t a thing, and hardcore double anal is the only thing she could do to be shocking…I mean Miley, or anyone else showing nipples doesn’t even phase us….

Not that I am complaining, I don’t think exhibitionism is ever played out and I think all girls should show me their ass cracks and nipples, whether it is in some classy fashion event way, for some cause like Demi Moore’s forgotten daughter, or while sitting on my face….it all works for me. I don’t discriminate. Nipples aren’t porn and one day the conservative ad agencies will get that.

Either way, nipples or not..she’s hot…


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Posted in:Rihanna

2014

03

Jun

Heidi Klum Implied Nudity with a Purse of the Day

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Heidi Klum decided to model nude with some expensive bag because she likes to come out of the woodwork, even though she’s 100 fucking years old, since it is good for her ego and for her to feel relevant…and I would be okay with that if her implied nudity was more spread eagled nudity as most girls tend to not give a fuck about their naked asses being out there when they hit a certain age, because they’ve pretty much given up on dignity and realize that naked or not, no one actually cares, but I guess in Heidi Klum’s case, it’s best to keep that vagina under wraps. She’s had countless children, but more importantly is German, an Aryan, and was fucking Seal a Black guy with scarred up face, not necessarily the kind of guy any one would fuck, even if he was the sweetest man or greatest singer around, but rather because he’s got a massive fucking penis and man-handles her like he was the farm hand…on the family farm…back during Nazi germany…

All this to say, the bag is in a good spot, because shit has gone into and out of that vagina, that would probably make it best kept secret- especially at 50 fucking years old…

Posted in:Heidi Klum

2014

03

Jun

Lily Aldridge Boring for Glamour Magazine of the Day

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I like to think that Lily Aldridge scammed the fucking system. She’s one of these entitled LA rich kid scenesters who grew up around the cool kids who “ran shit” in her city…and in doing so she got VIP and backstage at all the events…always dating the guy in the band, whether it was Kings of Leon or some other shitty act…like Maroon 5…you can’t hide your past…all while booking commercials…like tampon ads…

Then one day, she tricked a booker at the right agency to pull her out of commercial modelling she was only getting because she knew the right people, to actual modelling, because no commercial model really likes being referred to as a commercial model, but all models want to be Victoria’s Secret girls…so I guess the team at Victoria’s Secret factored in the fact her Husband was in a huge band, and the fact that she’s not that bad looking, even if she’s short, and her implants were small enough to fit in with the other girls, so book her in…it’s not like they even had to pay her.

I am convinced, she is a volunteer working for them. I am also convinced she’s a horrible person…the only interesting thing about her is that her mom was a Playmate in the 60s and I’m all looking at bids of anyone raised by pornstars of their generation…even if I think they suck.

Posted in:Lily Aldridge

2014

03

Jun

Victoria Justice Shopping Cart Porn of the Day

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I don’t really know who Victoria Justice. I know she had a TV show based on her that creeper dad’s fell into because she played the underage girl, who was the focal point of the show, leading to being the one they wanted to bang when forced to watch it with their kids, because guys are like that, we sexualize hot little fame whores sluts on their own show, if their pants are tight enough, whether they are role playing as a teen, or a college girl, we just don’t care, it just makes stomaching her shitty fucking smutty, brain washing garbage we have no choice but to watch, more tolerable…

I do want to know who her stylist is, because she’s bending over a shopping cart in a “we’re normals too, just like you peasants, we shop”…and in doing that her full ass is exposed and that turns me on….it makes me want to grocery shop…and not for the normal reason I like grocery shopping…like the sad single girls I can target based on their order….

That said, her name is Madison Guest. She’s a “fashion stylist’…this is her INSTAGRAM …or you can just masturbate to these pictures I’ve pulled from it to save you the work…but

She’s not all that great…but you can masturbate to anything – that’s all you have going for you.

Posted in:Victoria Justice

2014

03

Jun

Erica Candice for Cake Magazine of the Day

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OMG…more young models trying to get ahead by getting naked. I love the fucking world….or at least that aspect of the world…where everyone wants to be a Victoria’s Secret model. Where everyone wants to be on camera. Where the world is so porned-up and sexualized, that showing a little tit isn’t a big deal. I mean young girls are in braless sheer tops and shorts that show off their asses practically everywhere I fucking go…this a new thing, one built from the internet that has been going on in Europe since the 60s…and that I think needs to be celebrated…because topless modelling isn’t a career breaker, even a pig like Kim Kardashian who was a human urinal on camera for money is now making 100 million a year for her family…it’s just the way things work…so girls…keep getting naked.

This models name is ERICA CANDICE , you’ve never heard of her and either have I….the photographer Karl Rothenberger and the reality is these could have been topless selfies sent to my snap chat, I’d still be into them…

Posted in:Erica Candice

2014

03

Jun

Torrie Wilson in a Green Bikini of the Day

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Torrie Wilson was a wrestler, but not the kind of wrestler I like, you know the drunk slutty single mother who wants to make the 150 dollar prize money at the local bar mud wrestling event to pay for her babies formula…the easier kind of wrestler to leg lock or get choked out by – because she’s pretty much given up, even when she’s too white trash to realize she’s given up…

Torrie Wilson is more of a wrestler who was hired as more of a model or Glamour girl that the WWF threw into the mix to make watching wrestling a less gay experience…

It was like – put girls in the mix, get the more homophobic trailer park dwellers something to justify the boners they get watching wrestling because they “aren’t fucking fags”…according to them, even though watching wrestling is some faggy ass behavior…

I mean, I know a lot of gay guys who would be able to masturbate to that shit, but in their defence all the gay guys I know are fucking perverts who can masturbate to anything with at least one testicle…

Either way, Torrie Wilson, is on the beach in a bikini and not fat. Awesome…or is it?

Posted in:Torrie Wilson