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2014

05

May

Anastasia Ashley Cliff Jumping of the Day

Anastasia Ashley is my girlfirned, she just doesn’t know it yet, probably because she’s too busy booking Carl’s Jr campaign and running off to Mexico posing her hot fit surfer body on the beach…to read my love letters…it happens with all the girls I like.

This is a video she posted of her jumping off a cliff, a jump I would try to catch her from if she let me be her hero everytime she falled, but apparently, she’s doing a good enough job being a hero on her own…proving, without even trying, that she is best there is, and I think it’s impossible to not get behind whatever she’s selling or whatever she’s about…because there’s nothing to laugh at or make fun of…there’s nothing negative or shitty…she’s just having a good time…and maybe that’s the lesson she’s teaching us uptight, angry, miserable fucks…just stop taking yourself so fucking seriously and have a good time…that or that surfer ass is pretty magical…

Posted in:Anastasia Ashley

2014

05

May

Hilary Duff Gets Her Tit Grabbed By Alanna Masterson of the Day

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Scientologists be crazy….

Here’s Hilary Duff, who I don’t really know if she’s a Scientologist or not, getting her titty grabbed by one….but not just any scientologist, but rather the cute, lovely and sweet Alanna Masterson, who once followed me on instagram before realizing I am a depraved weirdo…who unlike her, doesn’t post pics of me grabbing Hilary Duff tits on the internet, not that I wouldn’t if I had the opportunity to, but I’d be much more into releasing the unprotected anal sex tape…

I guess I’m more of a romantic than Alanna, you know into penetration, not just the silly tease…but what it comes down to is that I am glad this pictures happened…Keep up the good work girls…keeping experimentation with lesbianism fun, casual and amazing…one titty grab

Posted in:Hilary Duff

2014

05

May

Emily Ratajkowski Butt Shot of the DAy

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I wonder if Emily Ratajkowski realizes she’s a one hit wonder..like that she made all her dreams come true last year…and now there’s no where to go from here…it’s like everyone has seen her tits, everyone cared and though “Oh, She’s So Hot”…but now she’s old news, we’ve seen everything and don’t care if she can act or if she can sing or dance…we don’t care if she books Playboy or fucking Victoria’s Secret…she didn’t even win the Sports Illustrated Rookie of the Year award that was paid for by the people at Guess? and the Hadid household…

Is this ass pic a “hey cry for attention, I’m still here”…or is she just the exhibitionist she always was….

Who cares, I just hope she gets desperate and starts calling like she used to…it will happen, because it always does…the more desperate he girl is for attention the more Facebook messages I get…and they are welcomed because I would still let her suffocate me by sitting on my face.

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski

2014

05

May

Christina Milian’s Bikini Bullshit of the Day

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Christina Milian is on some serious self produced bikini hustle. This is the third or fourth bikini this week…maybe it’s because she knows being the live show host of some shitty show like the Voice is a shitty gig, because she has to be reminded that she’s not the actual host, while Carson Daly is…to some a fate worse than death…but more importantly, she is on a show starring and produced by Adam Avril Lavigne…also a fate worse than death…and that motherfucker posted a pic of his blonde hair, drawing attention to himself, even ending up as a trending story on Facebook, even though he doesn’t matter as a person, in fact he’s the fucking worst, yet people still buy into his pop music bullshit…and I guess getting half naked is how she competes…I’m into it, even though I’m not into her.

Posted in:Christina Milian

2014

05

May

Kate Upton and the Rest of her Vogue Shoot of the Day

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I hate bikini pictures, maybe it is because I am not a real man, or maybe it is because I have been looking at them for the last fucking decade…and eventually they all become the same, no matter who the girl is in the pics…it’s like eating pizza every night for the last 10 years, no matter the flavor it’s still fucking pizza….

But I am all about science…and special effects…and the fact that Vogue made Kate Upton look this good, makes me believe in one thing, smoke and fucking mirrors…

The fact a Sports Illustrated chubby chick is even in Vogue is funny enough to begin with, but when they take a gut we’ve all seen and turn it into this, it’s just even more ridiculous, like it is a parody of itself, and when tits are involved, I guess I am reminded that “it’s still fucking pizza” doesn’t have to be a bad thing, especially when you’re Kate Upton, cuz bitch will eat anything you throw at her…

Posted in:Kate Upton

2014

05

May

Izabel Goulart Fitness Erotica of the Day

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Izabel Goulart, like Jane Fonda, and really every exercise workout queen before her, except maybe Richard Simmons, has made fitness pornographic…and I think it’s a positive thing for the youth, because it allows them to look up to people like her who spend days and hours in the gym, while girls like Kate Upton, who may be more famous, thanks to being more sloppy, spend hours eating donuts….

I just think in terms of role model, this is a better image the media should buy into, because low body fat, high muscle mass, leads to a healthy and happy life..while the Kate Upton, embrace my obesity angle, leads to premature death…

I guess the more I fuck around on instagram them happier I am to see fitness is coming back as hard as these pics make me, which isn’t all that hard, considering…I don’t do fitness, I have diabetes, I am obese and haven’t had an erection in years…not due to castration due to sex offence, but due to unhealthy…but I still know these are hot

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

05

May

McKayla Maroney Riding Her Bike Seat Hard of the Day

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Sometimes you meet girls in clubs or bars who are 15 years old , but who look and act like they are 25, and who think are 25, until you caught chatting them up or buying them liquor and you get in trouble…

Sometimes you meet girls who are over 18, who look and act like they are 12, fucking annoying and unsexy at least to me…playing up their young looks and body in a way that is just creepy, yet legal, attracting all the fucking male attention from the perverts who, unlike me, love young teens….while I just find their body and their energy annoying…I mean every time I walk in a starbucks I want to kill myself….

McKayla Maroney is one of the over 18, who looks and act 12, and who plays it up because she knows that’s why she has an audience, like in these pics of her grinding a bike seat, knowing exactly what she’s doing, but playing it up like she’s not doing it, which I guess is the premise of every teen category porno ever produced…

She’s fucking with your minds, and you’re buying into it, because you are into this shit..and I just like calling a girl out on her hustle to get more fans…

Posted in:McKayla Maroney

2014

05

May

Elle Fanning for Interview May of the Day

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Elle Fanning is 16…but never too young to be featured in Interview magazine, you know to discuss what being a young actress means to her, or whatever the generic bullshit questions they got her answering, whether it was about her childhood, her famous sister, her stage parents or losing her virginity…as riveting or controversial as it was or is, because I haven’t read the shit, I think it was just a good excuse to get her in a bikini and not seem like a bunch of creepers at the beach in sunglasses, setting up their chairs next to young girls in Brazilian cut bikini bottoms tanning, taking selfies and wrestling…not that I’d know anything about that, even though it’s what I did all day yesterday….

Posted in:Elle Fanning

2014

05

May

Sonya Gorelova Amazing in Numero of the Day

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Sonya Gorelova is a Ukrainian model and she’s in this issue of Numero magazine and girl looks good…

Maybe I’m into bright colored bikinis, fish nets, or just soviets walking around in heels and a bikini, like a bunch of tacky sex workers, looking for a husband…to help them escape the rationed bread hell that is about to get taken over by Russia a second time…at least that’s what I assume is happening from my ignorant, don’t watch the news perspective, a perspective I am sure Sonya Gorelova shares with me, cuz she’s probably in America popping bottles with rappers like other models, and forgets what the Ukraine even is, because she’s too busy tanning on yachts..

Posted in:Sonya Gorelova

2014

05

May

Isabeli Fontana in Porter Magazine of the Day

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There was a time – when Isabeli Fontana was an underage lingerie model from Brazil, who booked a Victoria’s secret campaign, a dream for all models, before ever graduating from high school, or even before having a driver’s license…yet Victoria’s Secret, never went to jail for this underage lingerie shoots…either did their photographers…since like Disney before them, they’ve been able to beat the legal system when it comes to these things…Sex Offending and inappropriate photoshoots with teen girls, is for poor people….

She’s 30 now, has a bunch of kids, is doing this shoot for some magazine and I think she’s amazing….even though I should hate her as much as her uterus does for doing this to her…even though she still looks awesome!

Posted in:Isabeli Fontana