DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

17

Mar

Nicole Trunfio’s Bikini of the Day

Nicole Trunfio is some Australian TITTY MODEL who lives or lived in the States where she tried to get famous enough to be in Victoria’s Secret or some shit, but who instead got Famous back home, where she booked a TV hosting gig, because America doesn’t need Australia, it has too many immigrants from other places to steal the Jobs from their own, to afford another…

So in ways, Nicole Trunfio has taken her tits and really made something of herself, in other ways she’s a complete failure who couldn’t cut it in Hollywood, but still has all the time in the world, at least before turning 30 to make it happen, now with Australian TV experience to get her a gig…and I guess all that matters is that she’s in a bikini…and that her boyfriend is black..yes white fans…black penis has desecrated this, but I am sure based on her look and eagerness to win at life, a lot worse has been up in her…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Nicole Trunfio

2014

17

Mar

Jojo Levesque in Some Bra Top of the Day

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I remember when Jojo was jailbait…you know straight for the mall tour to MTV…where creeps everywhere embraced her. Then she turned 18, got a black boyfriend, disappeared and spent all her month for what was probably 10 years…but now she’s back, showing her tits and ass to get noticed…because when you’ve thrown away your window of opportunity, tits and ass is the only way to get it back.

So here she is on the road at SXSW…in a bra top she performed in and showing her asshole in a fuck position to just enough exhibitonism to keep the fans wanting a little more sliding it to the side to fuck her…

Posted in:JoJo

2014

17

Mar

Dani Thorne in a Sports Bra of the Day

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I don’t know who Dani Thorne, but I assume she’s a raver, at least based on her raver outfit. I also assume she’s related to jailbait Bella Thorne and older sister hipster, naked for art or high concept Thorne…and I don’t know why I am bothering with this pic oh right…her shirt is like a bra and I guess that means something to me…just not very much…but I’m posting it anyway cuz bras may be the devil, but are better than shirts…

Posted in:Dani Thorne

2014

17

Mar

Rosamund Pike in a Bikini in Hawaii of the Day

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I don’t know who Rosamund Pike is…I guess I could google her…but what would that really accomplish or change…I mean someone felt she was important enough to paparazzi, and who would I be to not recognize her bikini body as being something more important than actual hot under 40 girls in bikini I can see on instagram…

So here she is, her vagina looks weird, but her abs look weirder…fun.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rosamund Pike

2014

17

Mar

Hot Ride of the Day

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I feel like this is what Kate Upton’s boyfriend feels like every time they have sex…and if you don’t like that…here’s a dude eating like Kate Upton probably eats…

I don’t know why I dedicated today’s videos to the Grand Daughter of the founder of Whirlpool…who made a career out of her rich girl tits…but I guess I am brainwashed by her sloppy tits too…drinking the sloppy tit koolaid… deal with it.

Posted in:Videos

2014

17

Mar

Jessica Alba Walking of the Day

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I started the site in a time when Jessica Alba was the biggest deal, even though she can hardly act, and never got nude in movies, making her pretty useless as far as my very astute taste in women goes..it’s like either give me talent or titties…this filler shit that looks alright cuz it isn’t fat and has a nice enough Mexican face is ok, but I don’t celebrate shit unless I see her tits…and that was before being a mom of two…

So I guess I am posting this as a memory of what was, or maybe to say she’s not so great, or maybe to speak to you old timers who haven’t moved the fuck on, or as a reminder to the new comers who don’t remember who Jessica Alba was because she hasn’t mattered the last 10 years…that she doesn’t matter, even when in clown pants and her corporate mom site shirt…but people like me will post it anyway…even though they are the worst paparazzi pics pretty much ever…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2014

17

Mar

Sara Sampaio Does a Springbreak Party of the Day

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Sara Sampaio is some Portuguese Victoria’s Secret model, who I guess has to contractually go to some of their shitty events because otherwise they’d just recruit some other immigrant willing to whore out the brand harder in exchange for a USA work visa…

The event was some Spring Break party, where a bunch of ugly mainstream college kids got drunk, before getting herpes or pregnant, so thirsty for someone hot, famous and not fat, that when Sara Sampaio came out, everyone went nuts, like the ginger.

Hardly news, hardly interesting…if anything it makes me wonder why I didn’t go on Spring Break this year to creep on all these young idiot girls who don’t know better and are willing to make bad decisions…but ultimately, in doesn’t interest me at all…if anything, it scares me.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS OF HER IN BIKINI CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sara Sampaio

2014

17

Mar

Welfare Dude of the Day

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I live in Canada so I am used to people on Welfare and figure it’s just part of life, but it always makes me laugh at how mad Americans, especially that rich get about people on Welfare, it’s a system that is in place, people use it, deal with it…but for some reason they find it so fucking offensive that people get 180 dollars in food stamps and they call it piggy backing on the tax dollars of the nation…like the host really thinks that this dude is stealing 5 cents out of his motherfucking pocket, instead of looking at how corrupt the actual government is, in terms of Salary the officials get, in terms of travel expenses, in terms of the government being a fucking scam…

I also like how dude suggests he works at In and Out Burger, then follows up saying how much he likes In and Out burger, because he’s probably paid by in and out burger…when no one over the age of 16 wants to work at In and Out Burger…

The whole thing seems like a SNL Skit, it’s funny on a lot of levels…watch.

Posted in:Videos

2014

17

Mar

Scarlett Johansson Full Frontal from Some Movie of the Day

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So these “nude” pics of Scarlett Johansson are being spread around the internet in some sort of marketing stunt for some movie she’s in….and I guess it’s a big deal to those of you who love Scarlett Johansson and never saw her fully nude in the selfies that got hacked out of her email a few years ago…

I am a constant asshole about Scarlett Johansson being overrated, dumpy, fat, whatever, but that’s just because I like my women anorexic, near death and too weak to run….

For normal people who are into girls with ass, tits, and belly that is reminiscent of a Marilyn Monroe, who Scarlett Johansson likes to channel…all the time…while playing the same role in movies…all the time…you’ll probably like these low quality, hard to make out, nudes….

I am more interested in what she said about Woody Allen raping a 7 year old…

“I’m unaware that there’s been a backlash. I think he’ll continue to know what he knows about the situation, and I’m sure the other people involved have their own experience with it. It’s not like this is somebody that’s been prosecuted and found guilty of something, and you can then go, ‘I don’t support this lifestyle or whatever.’ I mean, it’s all guesswork.”

“I don’t know anything about it. It would be ridiculous for me to make any kind of assumption one way or the other.”

Because it is a relevant statement, and it reminds me of the shit I’ve been saying about Terry Richardson.

The world is conditioned to side with the “victim” without any proof that the victim is a victim. Without fair trial, or even a conviction, or even an arrest.

It’s like just because some asshole makes a claim, the world sides with that claim as fact, Tried by the media, and that’s a scary state of affairs.

That’s like if you get backed into a corner because some girl at a bar tells the bouncer you grabbed her tits, and you get beat up for it. Or if some girl who you reject from sex because you are married, tells your wife she fucked you…

People fucking lie, we have a court system for a reason…

Not that this has anything to do with Scarlett Johansson’s full frontal…but these pics do…even if uneventful

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2014

17

Mar

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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Every St Patrick’s Day, I take the day off drinking, partially because I hate St Patricks Day and all it represents, with crowds of middle of the road 9-5, dumpy looking bitches I don’t want to fuck, who hate their suburban lives, and partially because I like to do the opposite of everyone else, just to confirm I hate the masses…

So today, I am not hungover, this is the Morning Clear Thinking Dump of the Day…it happens once a year…take it in.

That said, when I hear about an Earthquake hitting LA, I always hope for the best, if you know what I mean…and if you don’t, I mean that it takes out some of the evil the media shoves down our throats…

13 Epic Drunk Moments
GO

Amanda Seyfried Brings Knvies on Planes
GO

Scarlett Johansson Defends Woody Allen
GO

No Name Attention Seeker Ass Flash
GO

Madonna Does the Game of the Thrones
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Alessandra Ambrosio’s Side Boob Dress
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These Sluts Will Do ANything – You Won’t Believe it
GO

The Best NBA Players Under 25
GO

Drunk or Yoga
GO

SXSW Lie About Fake Bands
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS