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2013

10

May

Kate Upton for Vogue June 2013 of the Day

Kate Upton is so overrated that talking about how fat and overrated she is is already played the fuck out….you know what more can be said about a doughy looking sloppy 19 year old, who got popular for having abnormal sized tits, that I always knew the rest of her would catch up to, but I guess no one cared about that, because we are an instant gratification generation, who can’t bother worrying about her weird gut and hips, and saggers while still teen, they just wanted her cleavage….

I guess every generation needs an Anna Nicole Smith….busty and fat….I don’t know why we’d need that…but her viral success that’s got her up in fashion magazines like Vogue….tell me a different story…

I’ve always been the guy to say leave the pig in the barn, even when everyone else says, bring the pig out, dress her up, put some lipstick on her, and let’s have a good old fashion pig gangbang.

I’m right and doing the right thing, the humane thing, but they are the masses and they are loving this pig, eagerly waiting hard to have sex with the pig….in an “if everyone’s doing it” kind of way….while I’m happy to sit this one out and be the outsider on this one….

Even if this pig everyone wants a piece of happens to be a busty model making millions…maybe I’m the idiot…but I stand by my morals and values…

All this to say, thank god for photoshop….If you know what I mean….

Here is the video…

Posted in:Kate Upton

2013

10

May

Kirsten Dunst in her Underwear on Set of the Day

Here are some seriously shit quality pics of Kirsten Dunst on her movie making comeback tour – on the set of Anchorman 2 – and she’s in her underwear….at least that is what I am told…it looks more like some weird looking dress , or maybe some vintage lingerie that she got back when her career was relevant, 50 fucking years aog….

It’s the kind of underwear that you’d think that I can’t really masturbate to….but luckily…I can masturbate to anything…especially a silly toothed, big titty, mental health issue ridden, addict who was once an “It girl” everyone loved, despite her inability to shower, who is still trying despite being old, tired, damaged and in pixelated lingerie from another era…..

If you throw it my way, if I’ll take on that masturbation challenge….it’s the only thing I know.


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Posted in:Kirsten Dunst

2013

10

May

Barbara Palvin’s Behind the Scenes Lingerie Pics of the Day

I guess this Victoria’s Secret recruited 18 year old from a Eastern European country, that I can only assume is part of the human trafficking trade, because how else does an 18 year old girl from an Eastern European country end up in America working for top brands….I mean all the Eastern European girls I know are on webcam sites hiding their bruises while being watched by their handlers so they don’t cry for help…..

Whatever the reason for Barbara Palvin, she’s here, she’s not all that hot, she’s modeling for Intimissimi Lingerie, because I guess Victoria’s Secret likes to share her, you know lend her to other companies, to build her resume and portfolio and fanbase, before locking her down, and these are the behind the scenes pics. Inspiring. I know.

Posted in:Barbara Palvin

2013

10

May

Miranda Kerr, Candice Swanepoel, Behati Prinsloo Half Naked Pics for Social Media of the Day

Miranda Kerr and Candice Swanepoel posted these pics to their instagram and the world liked the shit out of them because Miranda Kerr and Candice Swanepoel are big fucking bikini and lingerie model stars….that all the 17 year old girls and white trash women who shop at Victoria’s Secret look up to as idols….”look there it’s the girl in the store in the bra i’m wearing paw”….you know real important idols because the world needs more bitches trying to get fit and half naked…rather than wanting to achieve other things in life that actual matter….and that works for me…because I like half nakedness on babes…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|Miranda Kerr

2013

10

May

Kylie Minogue Slaps Her Own Ass on Twitter of the Day

Kylie Minogue posted this stupid picture of her slapping her own ass, in what I call Technology making triplet fantasies come true for those bitches who aren’t triplets but who you wish were, except there’s not enough eating herself out or fucking herself with a strap on to really make it count…remember it’s not incest if you’re from the same litter, it’s masturbation and it is definitely not incest if you were photoshopped to look this way….

Boring, I know. Posting it anyway. Deal.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue

2013

10

May

Catherine Zeta Jones and Rooney Mara’s Lesbian Kiss of the Day

This clip is from a movie called Side Effects, that Rooney Mara gets naked in ….but that more importantly…Catherine Zeta Jones tongues.

It may be acting, but I believe their pussies are dripping while shooting this, it makes it better that way. You know, all crazy bi-polar chicks are sexual deviants…it’s all part of their insanity…which is why if you ever get a chance to fuck a bi-polar, do it, it is a lot of fucking fun…even if you may fear your life at times dealing with their crazy….Schizo’s are pretty fun too, it’s like an orgy, multiple people in the body of one person, that sometimes starts out normal, moves onto baby voices, turns into a sexual porn chick dirty talker, and ends up crying like an abused puppy, all in the span of 15 minutes. Fun.

Either way, I guess this was the natural progression for Zeta Jones, you know since she is married to ELLEN….

Posted in:Catherine Zeta-Jones|Rooney Mara

2013

10

May

Some Model Named Cecile Naked for Purple of the Day

Fashion magazine PURPLE.fr put out these pics of some model named Cecile, and they are quite lovely…because they remind me that fashion magazines trick girls who would never really be getting naked in pictures, like if I asked her to get naked for pictures for me, she’d say no, but when these magazines come along, they think “opportunity, I am the next kate moss, here’s my pussy, do you need me to spread it”…..and I love it….meaning I need fashion magazines and the fashion industry more than I need porn…because the fashion magazines get the thin, hot girls who would otherwise never be naked, naked….and that’s what I fucking live for…

Posted in:Cecile|NSFW

2013

10

May

Lily Aldridge in Some Lingerie Catalog Pics of the Day

Here are some inspirational catalog pictures that really capture the natural beauty of the subject, you know really setting a mood that is exactly the fucking same as every other Victoria’s Secret catalog picture I have posted the last decade, yet that I continue to post, even if they aren’t inspiring, interesting, or even hot, because these evil corporations have me brain washed….

They’re like here’s some LA Rich kid, who’s mom did Playboy and who’s dad did Beatles album art, who decided to be a Tampon commercial model before somehow tricking Victoria’s Secret into letting her into their VIP club … posing like all the other immigrant models they’ve got….and I’m buying into it….all because I have a penis and like looking at half naked girls.

Posted in:Lily Aldridge

2013

10

May

Mariah Carey’s Motorcycle Erotica of the Day

I have heard that older chicks love riding motorbikes because they make them cum. All the machinery, adrenaline, vibrations just hit their tired vaginas better than any man could, you know since it’s some massive hitachi magic wand, with more than just a plug in, with it’s massive engine….but usually biker chicks are disgusting, and the idea of their soaked through panties disgusts me, you know because their tattooed up, white trash tattoos scare me….

But for some reason, seeing mom Mariah making a comeback in her 40s, like she was 20, dressed in skimpy clothes, doing twerks, simulating orgasm and grinding up on the motorbike, isn’t as fat or aggressive as I’d think, and she’s actually lookin’ hot…and that just weirds me out.

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2013

10

May

Coco’s Inspirational Workout Pic of the Day

I don’t know about you, but when I need to feel inspired and get motivated in the morning by looking at fitness pics of girls working out…saying “shit I love fitness, health and all these other things I don’t have in my life but probably need”….Coco is not who I turn to…you know she’s not my thinspiration, if anything, all the attention her fat ass has got has turned otherwise anorexic looking girls into curvy monsters…because she basically says “if you eat, rappers will like you, rappers are rich, lock it town hooker’….and the people listen….despite how irrelevant Coco is…unless I’m just reading into things too much…and girls are just fatter assed across the board…..which is probably the case…

Posted in:Coco