I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2011

14

Mar

Jenny McCarthy in her Bikini of the Day

I know I make fun of Jenny McCarthy because she’s old. Because she’s annoying. Because she’s got a stupid loud face that used to irritate me despite how big her fake tits were or how naked she was on TV…she was like Jersey Shore in overrated back in the 90s. The even gave her her own horrible sitcom…all because she got naked in Playboy…it made no sense…

I know I make fun of Jenny McCarthy for having an autistic baby, or a polluted womb that makes autistic babies, not because I think anything is wrong with autism and at times think I may be autistic, but because I think it is funny to see people’s reaction of how heartless I am, when autism isn’t a real disease, it’s a fucking blessing that will leave her little baby the next Mark Zuckerberg….cuz people are idiots…

And now I know, fake tits age niceley…shit almost looks like they grew there on their own….

Lookin’ good McCarthy, as long as you’re in pictures and I don’t have to hear or see your bad comedy act…when you should just stick to getting naked and/or half naked.

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Posted in:Jenny McCarthy

2011

14

Mar

Amanda Seyfried Walkin her Dog in a See Through Sweater of the Day

I’m still Amanda Seyfried’s unofficial fan club.

It’s got nothing to do with her bullshit career, from Mean Girls to Jennifer’s Body, see I use Wikipedia, it’s fully due to her nudity and sex scenes in Stripping Chloe .

Bitch is a fucking talent as far as I’m concerned and whether she’s boring or not in public, like she usually is, cuz she knows she’s got this thing on lockdown and doesn’t need to try to impress, cuz we’ll keep watching…

I think I can see through her sweater. Good Job. I feel like she’s doing it all for me…no I don’t. I’m not weird like that…I’m just weird enough to post pics of a bitch walking her fucking dog like some kind of creep…

Posted in:Amanda Seyfried

2011

14

Mar

Hayden Panettiere is a Midget in a Dress of the DAy

Hayden Panettiere looks pregnant, but maybe she just let her massive Russian fighter boyfriend cum inside her and hasn’t squeezed it out yet, like the bitch I just spent 10 minutes watching in some creampie porn, as a reference point, to see if my scientific theory actually makes sense….then again, she is kind of a midget, and maybe she’s just eaten a jelly bean or some shit and her little midget stomach looks round and full, or maybe she’s got fat, but I prefer thinking it’s caused by her circus freak show sex….

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere

2011

14

Mar

Kelly Bensimon Muscles in Her Bikini of the Day

I can’t figure out what the hell I’m looking at, I just know it is in a bikini. It could have a great career as the monster in a horror movie, but instead it is just the rich ex wife of some rich fashion guy who clearly has too much money on her hand so that she can afford botox, plastic surgery, trainers, health food and not working to achieve everything that is wrong with the rich tropy wife life. You know using your looks to get you so much, and trying to hold onto those looks cuz they all you have going for you, and who really cares why this middle age rich ex wife comeback tour happened, I just know that whatever it is, it looks like it’s coming to eat my babies and it’s freaking me the fuck out.

Posted in:Kelly Bensimon

2011

14

Mar

Shauna Sand Feeds Her Male Prostitute of the Day

It’s only fair, you know considering dude has to pretend to date this monster, and dude is probably shooting another sex tape with this monster, which means sticking his dick inside her scary, black, gaping pussy because that’s the only pay day the bitch has had, I mean other than when her soap star ex husband cuts her child support checks….cuz you know she’s such an involved and focused parent, an idol and inspiration to her kids, a role model as to what they shouldn’t do with their bodies, a reminder of their mom’s hooking to give them life luxuries so they don’t have to hook everytime she steps out of the house, going to clubs or laying on the beach half naked with multiple boy toys she hires to be her companion…

Hopefully, some of her time is spend analyzing her sex tape’s performance….to figure out how to do better next time around…cuz you know there’s going to be another one…cuz you can’t be a whore crying for attention without one.

I call this a pornstar in denial….No she’s not in denial, she should just be denied the opportunity to do porn…She’s the kind of bitch who shows up at the audition with a vagina on her face, that could probably double as one, cuz based on the dead animal in her panties, it probably would be the safer alternative, and more importantly just as fucking numb.

You gotta see her sex tape – It’s hilarious…….

Posted in:Shauna Sand

2011

14

Mar

Jessica Alba’s Boring Pregnancy Continues of the Day

Apparently she hasn’t had an aboriton yet…Instead she decided to bore us with her happy growing family bullshit, when she should be boring us with her vagina, you know in an “oh Alba’s nude in another movie, god does she know how to do anything else” kind of way, but instead we gotta deal with this bullshit….So much wasted potential all thanks to an internal cumshot and a Catholic use of birth control…Disgusting.

You can see her pregnany milk producing mom nipples from far but not when close up.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

14

Mar

Ronaldo and Irina Shayk Pretending of the Day

Ronaldo pretends he’s not gay, Irina Shayk pretends she’s not pretending to be his girlfriend in exchange for an SI Swimsuit model career.

I don’t know what’s worse…that Ronaldo pretends to be straight, or that the millions of dudes around the world who have “non-sexual” crushes on the motherfucker, cuz you know, they really dig his soccer skills, pretend they are straight, cuz you see Ronaldo could just be a dainty little Euro, who actually fucks models who get on the cover of SI cuz they are dating him, sure he wears tight white pants and has real queer haircuts, but he is not the one obsessing over a dude, watching him run around in short shorts, and talking about him on his spare time.

Something to think about…cuz I know you are got nothing else to think about…

Posted in:Irina Shayk

2011

14

Mar

Morning Hangover Dump

Morning – Hangover – Caused By Alcoholism – Dump caused by Food Intolerance….

Here’s a Pair of Girls I Wish Were Sitting in in My Livingroom Right Now
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How To: Find the Perfect Cheerleaders
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Cam Sluts That Have the Right Moves
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47 Years of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit
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Check Out These Sexy Miss World Bikini Babes
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Usher has a Sex Tape – I assume with Beiber
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Pogo Stick Double Back Flip FAIL – VIDEO
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Charm Killings is Killing It – VIDEO
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Girlfriend and a Vibrator – VIDEO
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New Orleans Tells Bad Girls Club to Fuck Off and It’s Kinda Amazing
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Posted in:MHD

2011

14

Mar

Snooki is Disgusting But Someone Loves her of the Day

I will never understand Snooki or why she is famous. I will never understand how this happened, cuz she’s just a fat little ditch pig you’d expect to be rolling around in her own shit after a night of hard drinking in the privacy of her home town, and not on TV for the world to look at and try to make sense out of….You idiots made her a best selling author…I don’t think you realize how wrong that shit is….Just last year she was writing her name in period blood on her ex hook-ups bathroom mirror, cuz it was the only word she knew….It freaks me out.

Big tits lose their appeal when they are hanging over a big stomach. Trust me, I know this shit first hand cuz fat chicks like me enough since they have no one else….

Watching her make these faces in hopes of hiding her ugly, while looking like an idiotic myspace profile pout from the 2000s, is kinda funny….

There is nothing hot about this….

This post was inspired by this bikini picture…

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Posted in:Snooki

2011

14

Mar

stepNEWS of the Day

What’s Japan? Oh, that boring place that’s dominating our news, and making us miss such critical stories. Good thing I am here with the real news….Global natural disasters that kill tens of thousands of people haven’t got shit on these useless stories….I guess I’m just doing my part to keep America focused….I don’t think Japan appreciates this joke….

Man has 82 Julia Roberts tattoos

Student Says He was Cuffed to Cabinet
A former Grady High student claims in a new lawsuit that he was handcuffed to a filing cabinet at the school for about seven hours.

Student Hospitalized after Paddling
A 14-year old Mississippi high school student was rushed to LeBonheur Children’s Hospital for surgery Friday after he blacked out following a school paddling Thursday.

Video Catches Felon Punching Elderly Man
A Rosemont man who police say is a convicted felon was caught on camera shoving and punching an elderly man as he waited to use a restroom at a Northwest Side grocery last month.

Shocking Hit-and-Run Caught on Tape
Dallas police are still looking for the driver who struck a woman as she was crossing the street in a busy entertainment district. But this time they have shocking surveillance video that will help them prosecute their case.

Posted in:stepNEWS