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Ozempic Katy Perry Finds the Only Audience Who Likes Her of the Day

Rita Ora in a Bikini of the Day

Jenna Ortega’s Ceiling Eyes Beetlejuice Promo Erotica of the Day

Dua Lipa in a Bikini with Balloons of the Day

Julianne Hough is a Mormon Gone Wild in a Tight Dress of the Day

2011

Jan

Selena Gomez Airport Security Porn of the Day

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I’ve already done a Selena Gomez Felt Up By Airport Security post this past week…I guess that officially makes watching little 18 year old bitches who fuck Beiber walking through airport secuirty officially a fetish and this site is the hub….maybe this is the big break I’ve always needed to become a household name, making me lots of money so that I can spend my days going through airport security to experience this fetish first hand, but I figure as an uneducated pervert, I’ll be better off just applying for a job working for TSA…you know since that’s pretty much their job requirement….and seeing everyone naked is mine…so it’ll be a blessed union…

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2011

Jan

Diane Kruger Leg of the Day

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I don’t know who Diane Kruger is, but I can assume she’s Freddie’s daughter, who got her face mangled by his when she was a child acting out of line…I also know that her name is German and she looks pretty aryan, and that germans like getting shit on, making her lots of fun at parties, especially if she shows off her legs, cuz that way you don’t need to really worry about being distracted by that hard face of hers and losing your erection, you can just focus on the task at hand, shitting down her motherfucking throat….

Unless that whole German scat thing is a lie, overhyped to make people like me excited about a culture, you know some Tourism Munich campaign to get hotel sales up or some shit…

And really who fucking cares.

Posted in:Diane Kruger

2011

Jan

Snooki has Multiplied of the Day

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Her name is Dena Cortese and she’s on Jersey Shore, I never heard of her, cuz I don’t watch Jersey Shore and I never will, but it does explain why she’s channeling Snooki and that’s because they are the same fucking person…

Like the gremlin you’d expect Snooki to be, someone must have got this bitch wet or fed her after midnight or maybe she just got herself wet and fed herself after midnight, cuz based on Snooki’s size and shape, that’s probably how it usually goes down…and she multiplied

But unfortunately, with all mainstream crap, all the people involved in the specific scene are pretty much the exact fucking same, cookie cutter version of their boring, obvious, useless, selves in the way they dress, the way they talk, the way they act, the music they like and everything about them, and I guess these trash pictures prove that.

I hate giving Jersey Shore more attention that I have to…but sometimes I slip up and the good news is that no one reads my site…so it’s like i”m talking to my fucking self in the corner…only damaging to me.

What a fucking pig of a person this bitch is….Will this ever end…..

Posted in:Deena Cortese|Snooki

2011

Jan

Jordana Brewster’s Pussy Puppy of the Day

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I’ve been seeing a lot more amateur videos of young girls on webcam with their dogs. I’m talking at least 5 videos in the last 3 months of different girls getting their pussies licked by their dogs. Shit starts as normal masturbation, next thing you know, bitch is getting eaten out by the family pet. It must be a new trend in masturbation…

Just the other day, I saw a video of a bitch laying back in panties and her dog started going at her underwear and she didn’t stop him while her boyfriend roared laughing. It’s like Dogs are the new sex toy….maybe cuz they clean up the orgasm mess after you are done…maybe cuz they can’t talk and therefore can’t tell on you…maybe cuz they do have great licking abilities…but the whole thing weirds me out…

I used to know a girl who used her dog to lick the cum out of her pussy after I fucked her and that never sat right with me….I didn’t realize she wasn’t alone in her weirdness, and as surprised as I was that young people are getting up on this..nothing ever really suprises me….our world is fucked…

Now this Jordana Brewster bitch isn’t helping me get past these recent traumatic events…there is no reason for this got to be on her lap…except maybe if he starts wagging his tail…it looks strategically placed…unlike this camera man who’s fucking up my chances of lookin’ up bitches skirt…

Now pass the ketchup bitch.

PS who the fuck are you?

Posted in:Jordana Brewster

2011

Jan

Tara Reid’s Discoball of Love in her Uterus of the Day

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Either Tara Reid’s has let her anorexia go, pill popping, appetite supressing hangover go and is finally allowing the calories from her hard drinking to catch up with her, or she’s growing a discoball of love in her uterus of her her own.

I am always amazed by Tara Reid’s ability to not be dead, from having the two decade long spring break party, and think she is well equipped to be a mother as she really gets what today’s youth is all about, as long as their is a keg close by.

I don’t know what I’m getting at her, but I do think she’s knocked up, and it’s nice that she found herself an immigrant “business man” to help maintain and continue the party that is her life…

I could be wrong, this is all based on her bloated stomach, which could be just a distended stomach like she was out of ethiopia, or her period, or even some heroin fueled constapation and really, who fucking cares….

Posted in:Tara Reid

2011

Jan

Amanda Seyfried’s Goodwill Publicity Stunt of the Day

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If I had known Amanda Seyfried was giving stuff away, I would have caught the next flight to LA to intercept the Goodwill drop off, so that I could masturbate on each and every item she once owned….before deeming it trash good enough for poor people…that would make for a good opportunity to have the paparazzi take pics of her…cuz she realizes that the more the paparazzi care about her…the more she gets paid…and that would probably also explain her Ryan Philippe relationship…but I assume his abs probably have something to do with that decision making process too…cuz girls like abs, and I know this for a fact, cuz girls don’t like me…but who needs girls when you have a box of crap once owned by girls…it’s the basis of my laundromat dirty laundry stealing hustle…cuz cumming on inanimate things owned by bitches who wont fuck you, it hotter than cumming on the bitches who do want to fuck you, cuz the fact they’d fuck you just makes them weird….and probably very unattractive…not that it matters…now stare at these shorts…this girl is a winner according to me….even if she’s boring in her day to day bullshit…since most people are…

Posted in:Amanda Seyfried

2011

Jan

Rachel Bilson is a Boring Shopper of the Day

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What the fuck am I supposed to write about some cunt celebrity in boring clothes shopping, other than that I want want to fuck her cuz she’s been marketed to me properly….especially since I The OC got me laid….cuz college girls are pretty easy…when you date rape them….

She’s not in her underwear, or in some exclusive sex videos Star Wars ex-husband put together in order to stay relevant when he realized that without him kidnapper her and locking her up in Canada, pretending it was a serious relationship, he’s just the dude who played Darth Vader who no one wants to hire and who no one cares about…

So she’s just boring at best, especailly in these pics…..and I can only hope she’s the kind of boring who let’s fucking loose in the bedroom to make up for how much she sucks in person…cuz it won’t belong before bitterness and desperation to pay the bills sets in for Star Wars and motherfucker delivers the goods…and until that happens, you’re stuck with this…and when it does happen, I hope it’s good enough to masturbate to cuz this fucking isn’t.

Posted in:Rachel Bilson

2011

Jan

Some Screen Actors Guild Awards Highlights of the Day

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I hate Hollywood. I hate celebrity. I hate the movies they are making. I hate the TV shows they are making. But more importantly I hate the actors….especially when they are at events created by themselves to celebrate themselves and legitimize their bullshit existence…

Here are the 10 most important things we learned from the Screen Actor’s Guild awards that took place the other night…

1- Jean Luc Picard has busty femal friends unlike all the people who grew up obsessed with his Star Trek captaining….

2- Paz de la Heurta has a Trophy I can only assue is for being a thickest bush exposed on TV – cuz this bitch doesn’t really act,
Paz de la Huerta just get naked all the time.

3 – Natale Portman could star in some ready to drop porn fetishes….unfortuately you all died on the inside…because despite not knowing a thing about this bitch…like that she’s a fucking annoying loser…you think you love her….making jerking off to her birthing impossible cuz you want nothing to do with admitting she’s even pregnant – Weirdo…

4- Sofia Vergara has overrated Tits….cuz she’s old and an immigrant…who should be cleaning hotel rooms…but isn’t…cuz she’s got a good throat…a lesson all girls know…

5- But not as overrated as Christina Hendricks….cuz she’s fat and fat girls don’t deserve any praise…ever…no matter how big their tits are…

6- They allowed pornstars to attend this year…

7- Sarah Hyland looks young but is 20…making it not illegal to jerk off to her while pretending she’s 12 for the sake of your fantasy….

8- Angie Harmom cuz Baywatch Nights never is eternal…

9 – Precious has a twin sister….

10 – That the Screen Actors Guild award is a mastubatory fest that was a waste of everyone’s time and that I am happy I didn’t watch or know what going down…

Posted in:Screen Actors Guild

2011

Jan

Some Thong Bikini Dancing on the Beach of the Day

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Who cares about celebrities when you have inbred faced white girls with decent asses dancing on the beach in some creeper video…I mean this is the shit life is about….watching overpaid cunts you shouldn’t care about frolick around in the water is alright…but I’m more into real life bitches…with hot asses…That I can actually approach cuz they don’t have security guards and a totally fabricated importance…cuz all you motherfuckers gave them an ego.

Fuck Hollywood. It’s boring…They are running out of ideas….and the insecure pussy they hire isn’t as hot as cool bitches frolicking the streets who don’t know they are hot and who don’t have this self-righteous bullshit importance…

Real life is where it’s fucking at and here is an ass in dance on the beach.

Posted in:Thong Bikini

2011

Jan

Irina Shayk is the Number 1 in DT Magazine of the Day

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Irina Shayk proves that with some looks, a willingness to get topless for photographers, and access to one of the biggest soccer stars who needs someone like her to help snuff out the homo rumors, becoming famous is easy…

She has been named the top hot bitch by DT magazine of the year…and her winning formula I call being a hooker latch on cunt for the right people, the people who the media care about and riding that shit to the top…

It is the Samantha Ronson piggy back on Lohan and she’s not even hot strategy that got her 50,000 dollars a gig, even though she didn’t know how to DJ and didn’t deserve any stardom, only in Irina Shayk’s case, she knows how to show off her hot little body and she’s pretty talented, so she’s just getting the recognitionshe deserves…she just needed the famous gay athlete to get her there….Good hustle.

Even though these lists are total bullshit lies paid off by publicists…

Some other contenders..

Number 2 – Some Bitch I never heard of….

The rest were just obvious…

Posted in:Irina Shayk