I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

24

Aug

Helena Bonham Carter in Her Bathing Suit Scares Me of the Day

Remember this bitch from Fight Club? Well it looks like that her common law husband, Tim Burton turned her into one of the gothic monsters you’d find in one of his movies. Only I don’t remember Beetle Juice or Edward Scissor Hands or even Pee Wee’s big adventure being a sloppy fat bitch in a bikini….maybe he based this look off the movie Big Fish and he pulled it off by letting her on set of Charlie and the Chocolate factory…..cuz he got turned on shooting Planet of the Apes and wanted his woman to have the same fuckin’ body type as those motherfuckers…..

I always thought Goths liked to look more like dying corpses but I guess she is keepin it real since she looks like fuckin’ hell.

You liked that play on words didn’t you. I’m sure I coulda done better but it’s the end of the fuckin’ day, now stare at this cellulite ridden ass and have nightmares…that’s all Tim Burton wanted in makin her look like this….

Posted in:Bathing Suit|Helena Bonham Carter|Tim Burton

2009

24

Aug

Natasha Henstridge Goin’ Nuts on the Beach of the Day

I don’t know what the fuck Natasha Henstridge is all excited about, she looks like shit and she knows it, otherwise she wouldn’t be all covered up on the fuckin’ beach. Maybe she’s doing it as a distraction, like people will be too preoccupied watching her song and dance clown performance to realize how much she’s let herself go, or maybe she just wants us thinking she’s crazy and that she must be on brain meds that make her retain water or some shit, because compulsive eating isn’t as luxurious a disorder.


Here are some pics of her in her bikini from a year ago when she looked less like an eater and more like someone I wanted to fuck….
GO

Here are those pics of her acting a fool….

Posted in:Beach|Natasha Henstridge

2009

24

Aug

Rachel Zoe Looks Like a Wet Rat on the Beach of the Day

I was walking my dog the other day and I saw all these flies circling something on the ground. When I got closer I realized that it was some dead animal or its fetus that was hairless and weird lookin’. I am not sure what it was but it was really pink and hairless and looked like skin was pulled over a little skeleton. I thought about taking a picture to share with you, but I am a pussy when it comes to that shit and I started gagging, but thanks to Rachel Zoe I don’t have to because it pretty much looked like she does, just instead of wearing a black sheet on the beach, it wore maggots that were eating its organs….

As much as we can make fun of this rat of a woman, the truth is that she was a stylist at the peak of Lohan/Richie and all those other young slutty celebrities, and she is the reason they all got skinny, and in them getting skinny, they put a ton of pressure on the teenage girls of that era to be skinny, all of whom are around 18 now and all of whom are superficial little sluts who aren’t fat and dress half naked. So if anything Rachel Zoe deserves some fuckin’ love and we should be celebrating her as we watch her struggle on her walk on the beach because she feels weak from not eating, because it won’t be too long before its too late and she’s wheelchiar bound or dead from an anorexic heart attack, and no hero deserves to go down like that….

Posted in:Beach|Rachel Zoe

2009

24

Aug

Leanne Rimes the Cheating Whore with Psoriasis Workin’ Out of the Day

I used to bond with a dude, not in a gay way, but in a “we both have really fat wives” way. He was a lot younger and lived across the street from me and for a few months we’d run into each other at the store buying ice cream or chips for our wives late night, and eventually we’d laugh about the shit and start telling horror storries about our wives. It was like a “My wife’s so fat” marathon at least once a week, eventually we started drinking together and our bond was our hatred for the fact that we have to share a bed with a fuckin’ barn animal everynight. He moved and we didn’t keep in touch, cuz I don’t do that faggot penpal shit, but I ran into him the other day and he was with a fuckin’ model lookin chick. She was in spandex shorts like she just finished working out and her ass was incredible. It was like he pulled her out of a mail order catalog or saved her from Brazil or some shit and I pulled him aside and asked what the fuck happened and he turned to me and said “one day she just decided to stop eating shit and working out and that was the best day of my life”….I was blown the fuck away, this hot piece of ass was the ugly fat chick he married who pulled her shit together, it was fuckin’ impossible, beneath all that fat was a fucking supermodel who is stickin’ by his side because she actually loved him and believes he actually loves her because he was there was she was at her lowest, that shit doesn’t even happen in fuckin’ movies…but gives me hope….even though my wife would never try to lose weight and if she did, she’d be the kind of girl who would end up 10 times uglier and disproportionate like some kind of monster or cartoon character because that’s the kind of luck I have….

Here are some pics of Leanne Rimes jogging….all fit and ugly to look at for the diehard fans who still have pics of her when she was 16 on their computers to jerk off to……too bad no one photoshopped her face in these pics…I feel like I am watching a dude jog….

Posted in:Jogging|Leanne Rimes

2009

24

Aug

Jennifer Tilly’s Tits in Leopard Print Bathing Suit of the Day

Jennifer Tilly brought her sloppy lookin’ body out to the pool and all you fans of Jennifer Tilly’s tits should have been expecting this because 95% of the time a girl has retardedly big tits, the rest of her follows fuckin’ suit. At least she tried to be ironic by wearing an animal print, because she looks like she belongs in a fuckin’ barn and I feel like I am at the fuckin’ zoo watching a slob in its natural habitat, only next time she should go for the cowprint, to be a little more accurate.

I know some of you get excited about big tits, so I guess she deserves a post, even if her body really deserves a fuckin’ personal trainer and diet plan….


Posted in:Uncategorized

2009

24

Aug

Ice T and Coco’s Tits Go Shopping of the Day

Ice T was out shopping with his permanent hooker wife. You see all he has to do is pay her in a nice lifestyle, buy her whatever she wants, pay for her plastic surgery addiction, pay the black magazines to feature her ass on the cover in some kind of ad deal, she sticks the fuck around and plays wife. That means she doesn’t have to strip ever again. That also means she refuses business from other John’s, unless Ice T feels gangster and decides to pimp her out, since he’s the boss and she does what he wants cuz that’s all part of the deal and the beauty is that he can’t go to jail for soliciting sex from her, since they are married. He’s got it all figured out, the whole plan is bulletproof if you are the kind of guy who only gets off to fuckin’ whores but don’t like the risk of fuckin’ whores……here she is with her tits getting paid…..

Posted in:Coco|Ice T|Tits

2009

24

Aug

Carla Bruni is Still in Her Bikini of the Day

I live near French people and they are lazy as fuck. They never seem to be working. They are always at lunch, drinking wine, eating cheese and bread and nothing ever gets done. It’s that whole livin’ the good life bullshit, but the last 2 weeks the President of the fuckin’ country has been chilling in his bathing suit with his hot assed power hungry/fuck her way to the top slut he is using as arm candy leading me to believe he’s a fuckin’ slacker, more interested in living out some romance on the French countryside, having picnics in the field under a tree and riding their bikes to the sea to skinny dip before making love on the fuckin’ rocks and less into running his fuckin’ country. I’d be mad if I was from France, but they probably have no idea what’s going on, because they are all out doin the same fuckin’ thing…I live in the wrong country….and here’s Carla Bruni and her hot ass in a bikini in pics cuz it’s better than nothing…..

Here’s Sarkozy waving to his people, thanking them for giving him the good life, and givin the rest of us a big fuck you, reminding us of that good life that we’re not livin

Posted in:Bikini|Carla Bruni

2009

24

Aug

Geri Halliwell Shows Off Some Leg of the Day

Here are pictures of Geri wearing a shirt for a dress like she just finished getting fucked by some business man she met at some expensive bar that she was looking for a husband at and who she instead ended up going back to a luxury hotel room with and she didn’t really have anything else to wear around while her cum covered dress was hanging in the bathroom drying.

I figured there would be other pictures that hit with a little more pussy in the shit, so I was prepping for it, but I don’t think they are, so I’ll post these anyway cuz we all like legs, except for my amputee fetishists, but I don’t write the site for you….

I guess the highlight of the pictures is how much her boyfriend looks like a fuckin’ cartoon character…

Posted in:Geri Halliwell|Legs

2009

24

Aug

Kate Gosselin’s Lesbian Ass in her Gym Clothes of the Day

Like all good single people, Kate Gosselin is heading home from the gym in spandex shorts because I guess she’s tryin to get the last of her freak baby making uterus fat toned the fuck up to land top quality pussy at the lesbian bars, which almost surprises me because I thought lesbians were more accepting of fat chicks.
I mean based on her show and the way she bossed Jon around like a fucking drill sergeant, I feel like she’s the kind of dyke who likes to wear the pants and have the big biceps no one wants to fuck with. You know the one with the strap on dildo strapped on at all fucking time….
Or maybe she just wants to be in top physical fitness because there’s a lot of pussy out there that isn’t going to lick itself that she’s been missing on all these years she sold her soul to television by pretending to be straight for a paycheck.
Or maybe she has more pressure on her in the lesbian world because she’s gone out and had so many fuckin’ babies and to lesbian’s that’s a whole lot of fuckin’ baggage, but at least they won’t have to go thru the whole gay couple adoption process if they settle with her but more importantly, they will probably appreciate the good life breeding provided for her, you know overdosing on fertility drugs, finding a sperm donor after pitching a show to TLC and having a dozen kids has made enough money to buy even the most expensive construction boots and plaid shirts on the market….
I guess it all works out in the end, now stare at this babymaking lesbian ass while it pumps gas with it’s lesbian haircut and lesbian ankle tattoo into its lesbian SUV….which isn’t very new age tree-huggin’ lesbian of her, but I guess she’s gotta fit all the kids inside her, like her vagina fits 4 lesbian fists inside her at all the lesbian parties, something she thanks breeding for everytime the other girls get excited about her talent….

Posted in:Kate Gosselin|Spandex

2009

24

Aug

Grandma Rape Story of the Day

Some grandmother in detroit is accusing her grandson of raping her. She is 47 years old, so it is safe to say that she’s a piece of fucking trash, because to have a grandson old enough to rape you, means he comes from a lineage of sluts who get knocked up at 16, so instead of complaining, she should just accept her fuckin’ fate, because it is the life she made for herself, and appreciate the dick inside her that she loves so much because dick got her in this mess to begin with and if anything try to get knocked up, because bitch still hasn’t hit menopause and trashy families love incest. Wht it all comes down to is that this give a whole new meaning to “My grandma’s got the best tasting cookie”…..

Posted in:Grandma|Rape