Her name is Rihanna, she’s pretty much the biggest thing in music, I mean unless you count Beyonce’s fat ass, but that’s a different kind of big that comes from eating too much Popeye’s chicken, the same Popeye’s chicken that lead to Beyonce’s husband running off to the islands to find new pussy that doesn’t looks and smell like cottage cheese and instead he molded this superstar.
So I guess I should be thanking Popeye’s chicken for making Rihanna happen and for making Beyonce fall from her throne because she broke the fucking thing at a family function. I usually try my best to not thank fast food companies, since they are the devil and ruined my wife’s ass and in turn my sex life, but I guess Rihanna and my wife’s premature impending death proves that they do some good, so don’t believe all the negative publicity they get….and look at Rihanna’s cleavage.
His name is Paul Daniels and you have no idea who he is because he is from the UK and that’s like another planet to your ignorant ass. Don’t take it personally because I didn’t know who he was either, but that’s not saying much, because sometimes I don’t even know who’s lookin’ back at me when I look in the mirror. I am just being dramatic. It happens. But if you wanted to know, he’s some magician, you know, something you’d expect to be a virgin’s sport, and he’s managed to get pretty rich off the shit. At least rich enough to cheat on his first wife with his assistant named Debbie McGee who is in the pictures with him.
I did a little Wikipedia search as I do and found out that he’s got something to prove, you know with being a magician and all, and he has been spoken openly about his sexual conquests, stating that he’s banged over 300 women, and letting us all know he’s gone a long way from practicing magic tricks throughout highschool, when other people were getting their dick sucked in their horse drawn carriages.
He also made this statement about his wife that I’d like to leave you with as you click on her picture to get a better look at her and her teeth…
“Once I got upstairs, Debbie was lying stark naked on the bed – eat your heart out fellas! She was wearing the sort of sleeping blindfold you get on long-haul flights. Printed on it was Do Not Disturb. But further down her body she had a sign that said Disturb”
Disturbed is right…..at least it’s what I am feeling right now and that may or may not have anything to do with these pictures, it seems to be a daily activity of mine, so I’m not pointing any fingers here. I’m just glad he didn’t talk about pulling a rabbit out of her cunt
Coleen Rooney is still chubby in her bikini on her permanent vacation. I got nothing to say about this doughy bitch, other than that I haven’t eaten all day, I’ve been too fucking lazy, something I have a feeling she’s never too lazy to do despite how lazy she may look.
I am in Canada and by being in Canada, surrounded by ice, there’s really only one sport that can get me off and that’s Figure Skating. A few years ago, I found a TV in the dumpster, brought it home, plugged it in and got one channel. During the cold, dark, winter months, the only thing I could jerk off to was their programming. Unfortunately, I was left hanging for a good part of the week, but I knew that when the weekend rolled around, I’d have some solid figure skating competitions to jerk off to. I’d watch these girls spin around in their elaborate costumes, parading their thick skating panties and ass cheeks to the world to appreciate when there was nothing better to appreciate out there. This love affair went on a good couple of years before I got drunk and threw the TV out the window because the show that was on was violating me in ways figure skaters never did, but I will always remember those shameful afternoons, with my dick in my hand watching the ice dance…no matter how bad I wanted it, not once did a bitch’s nipple come out of her dress, but yesterday, that all changed as this Russian skater showed the world her tit, 8 years too late….
DJ AM, Hayley Wood, Girlfriend
DJ AM’s New Girlfriend of the Day
If you are wondering who Gayer Than Bicycle Shorts and richer than he should be DJ AM is fucking now that he and Mandy Moore have broken up, and I know you are, it’s some American Apparel model named Hayley Wood.
I emailed Dov Charney, the guy behind American Apparel to tell me stories about this whore, because I know from some of the girls who have modeled for him for free over the years, that he normally gets them naked, sometimes makes them use sex toys and often times jerks off with them. I was looking for some exclusive Hayley Wood smut and stories, because I figure if DJ AM gets to see her pussy, so should we. He didn’t answer me.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think she’s worth bringing home to your parents, I don’t even think she’s worth dating or admitting to your friends that you know her, but she’s definitely the kind of hipster girl who is so hungry to get ahead and seen, that you could easily make her take it up the ass for promises of a legitmate career or some recognition. All so that she can get out of the retail world and into the celebrity world she’s tried so hard to get into…so hard that she’s even lowered herself to fuck DJ AM and that is some fucked up shit.
If you’re wondering why I am writing about DJ AM, it is because I have a long running hatred for this cocksucker even though he’s a fucking joke he can’t seem to take one.
Here are some straight from Facebook pics….
If you want to see this slut in American Apparel glory, follow this link and scroll down until you find “Hayley”. Their shit is ghetto and you can’t zoom in to see the real goods, but it’s good enough for you to get the idea of what’s going on… GO
If you want to add her to myspace and send her hate mail, I assume this is her profile, I mean unless some kind of loser faked a nobody’s myspace… GO
Here’s a shitty video and some picture of Nina Hartley’s ass. If you don’t know who Nina Hartley is, then you are an idiot. She is a 50 year old Jewish old school pornstar who has some crazy fucking booty. She is one of the longest running pornstars who seems to like what she’s doing, she hasn’t killed herself with a drug overdose and she hasn’t got the AIDS virus, so she’s the kind of experience slut all you young sluts should look up to as your idol.
She is educated, she is a feminist who thinks sex is something women give to men and she’s on some kind of quest to legitimize what she does and make it have a bigger purpose, even though no matter how many words she says to explain herself, I just can’t make out what she’s saying because her mouth is full of cock.
I don’t want to underestimate her life work, but let’s be real for a minute, you get fucked on camera, you have been getting fucked on camera for close to 3 decades and that makes you a slut, whether you are smart or intellectual about shit or not.
Here are the pics to make up for the shitty video, speaking of video Nina Hartley is still in “Mature Porn” and produces some instructional videos, because if there’s anything this bitch knows, it’s how to take a cock and eat some serious pussy…,
So I don’t know if this video is available, but it was sent to me by someone legit and I figured I’d post it. It’s supposed to be a leaked clip of former Miss USA and NBC’s Passions star Kelli McCarty’s porn called Faithless that’s coming out in a couple of weeks from Vivid.
I have a thing for good girls following their vagina’s demands and taking getting fucked to new levels. I figure that this bitch was a run of the mill kind of girl, who was relatively prude or at least pretended to be, because sluts aren’t supposed to be named Miss USA, boring chicks are. I figure her mother pressured into pageants as a kid and always made her stand up straight and say all the right things, leading her to some kind of teenage rebellion that only hit the year she turns 40 because it’s an awkward time in a woman’s life where you want to make sure you are fucked on camera before no one wants to see you fucked on camera and that rebellion is called being desperate for money, because last time I checked Passions killed Timmy and isn’t on the air anymore, and getting fucked on camera is pretty fucking easy money.
Now, I know this isn’t Kelli showing the world her real talent portion of the Miss USA Pageant that happened off camera in the Judge’s dressing room with her mouth and his dick, but it’s her tits and there aint nothing wrong with tits, unless of course they are lopsided, saggy or amputated.
Check out the official site to find more clips/info/pictures/whatever GO
BONUS – Here’s her Swimsuit Competition from 1991, Try Not to Jerk off the Dick Clark or her JC Penny Ghetto one-peice bathing suit….
The economic crisis has finally hit close to home, sure I am broker than shit and was happy to hear about the fall of the rich and powerful because I figured finally I’d have common ground with people who aren’t homeless, but it’s finally affected the site. Today I got notice that the one person advertising on the site is pulling their shit off because of “budget cuts”. I am trying to convince them not to go, because I pretty much need them to survive so if they do in fact leave, I will flame the fuck out of them as much as I can before the servers behind the site get turned off because they aren’t getting paid. I won’t give up easy, but I will give up.
If you or anyone you know do advertising sales or advertise online, it would be a good time to hit me up, because shit’s getting pretty fucking desperate. I may have to eat my wife’s flesh to survive, at least it will last about 10 years, she’s packing lots of meat.
The other news on the site is that I sold my soul to the paparazzi because I was tired of being threatened with law suits, knowing I didn’t have the right to host pics, so you’ll see an ad appear on the images, it’s a small price to pay for me to keep the site up, and I don’t think it’ll suck too hard for you, but if it does, let me know and I’ll go back to putting my ass on the line for your enjoyment you fucking asshole.
In the meantime, I will still be here as long as I can and here are my stepLINKS.
Help make me Survive Another Day while making yourself cum all over your belly….With Sluts Who Know Their Place in Life GO
The Only Thing Brooke Hogan Has Going For Her is Those Fake Tits
And Even Those Don’t Help That Much GO
Dolce and Gabbana Want Us to Think Scarlette Johansson is Marilyn Monroe GO
Looks Like Lohan’s Been Sniffing Some Kind of Drug….Told Ya So…Bitch is So Unstable She Contacts Me When She’s Fucked Up…Apologies in Advance for the Source. GO
Fran Drescher has been seducing me since her days back on the Nanny, sure, I used to jerk off to that shit and I’m not ashamed. The fantasy of being a rich man who hires a street whore to take care of your annoying kids while servicing you whenever you give her the command is what a life of luxury is all about. Just the thought of her her laugh raped my ears and sounded like my muslim friends raping their family’s chicken’s egg hole gets me all worked up by thinking about the grunts and screeches she’d make if I were to ever rape her egg hole, there may be laughs but I’d be aiming for cries, if you know what I mean….which I hope you do, because I have no idea what I mean, this is just a filler post. Deal with it and look at her seducing poses and bra I wish was my mouth slip….
