I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

12

Jun

Mariah Carey and Her Assistant Tend to Her Cunty Sore Back of the Day

It’s so typical that the half white girl would treat the all black husband as her fucking slave because white people are the devil. It makes things worse when you’re a younger dude and your wife is some kind of diva bitch who things the world works for her, making you the first officer in serving her cunt self.

These are pictures of Mariah Carey’s old weathered body beat up on set because she probably had to swim a lap, or throw a volleyball and now bitch is crying like she broke something because that’s why cunty spoiled brats do. The good news for her is that her bitch, fulltime personal assistant and husband is there to help her out, because it’s not like he’s got his own shit to do.

This job would be like winning the fuckin’ lottery after signing an agreement with the devil, taking you out of your poverty ridden shithole life, and bringing you to the life of luxury with the woman you lusted after when you were a teenager, and it all sounds pretty good, but within a year, you’ll be hanging from the rafters in your attic of your multi-million dollar home after killing youself because you just can’t take her shit anymore, so getting up into this shit when you’ve got your own money and hot younger bitches lined up is beyond me, but maybe Nick Cannon is a good little black kid who respects and serves his woman cuz his mom was an over-bearing Jesus freak in the projects.

I really don’t know, but I do know that his life with Mariah, despite all the superficial goodness seems like it’s just the worst job of his career and every minute of it fuckin’ sucks, even when jerking off to her while she’s asleep because she’s too tired doing nothing all day to put out.

Posted in:Back|Mariah Carey|Towel

2008

12

Jun

Mischa Barton’s Got a See Through Shirt of the Day

Mischa Barton’s sloppy legs have decided to take her body out for a walk and she’s wearing some American Apparel lookin’ sheer thin t-shirt with no bra, which is a good fucking strategy to distract us all from her legs. I never really had an issue with small tits, I figure as long as a bitch has nipples (sorry cancer survivors), she’s good to go, sure sometimes a bitch can be flatter than a teenage boy, but as long as there’s a pussy I am oay with it. The only problem that comes up is her jealousy and feelings of inadequacy compared to my spectacularly disgusting fat man tits.

I like to look at myself as the gateway to lesbianism, sure I claim to have a penis but it’s barely there and my tits, despite being disgusting are a solid b-cup, so I feel like there’s little difference between me and a fat hairy chick and for girls who are too scared of the social implications of rubbing cunt with their girlfriends, I make for a good time, and by good time I mean the personality behind the androgyny can make any girl turn off men. I think of it as a talent to help people come to terms with their sexuality and to overcome their fear, kinda like the snakes they throw into the tub to cure people of their fear of snakes, only without anything remotely comparable to a snake. I figure that analogy sucked, but you get what I’m sayin.

Posted in:Mischa Barton|See Through

2008

12

Jun

Elizabeth Hurley Doesn’t Like You of the Day

At first I thought this picture of Elizabeth Hurley was just her giving the paparazzi the finger because they are invasive cocksuckers who never seem to go away, kinda like herpes when you have a weak immune system, only the annoying immigrant that stalks and snaps off pics of you version.

The whole thing that bothers me about these cocksuckers is that they do spend money getting the pictures I post, but that money they spend is on stalking a bitch, I’m talking airline tickets, hotel rooms, car rentals and zoom lenses that to put the immigrant with a camera in the right place at the right time to capture the moment, but they don’t actually pay for the production of the pictures like a photoshoot would, and they aren’t paying the talent in the pictures, even though the illegal immigrant is the one who shouldn’t be getting paid and not the subject of the fucking picture, then they come to me demanding money or lawsuits for pictures they claim are theirs but never prove are theirs and it just doesn’t make sense to me.

But then I realized Liz Hurley isn’t giving the paparazzi the finger, she’s giving you the finger, because along with the rest of us, she hates you too.

Posted in:Elizabeth Hurley|Finger

2008

12

Jun

Amy Winehouse has a Hot Body of the Day

If there’s one thing we can learn from Amy Winehouse, it’s that exercise and diet aren’t the only way to lose some excess pounds, you can always turn to heroin because shit jacks you up so hard you can’t hold down anything you eat, except for maybe some popsicles because there just soothing on your rotting heroin mouth because the other good thing about heroin is that it’s so fucking good, you don’t need to wash or shower or really do anything that involves hygiene and despite that approach not working out so well for the smells that come out of my wife on a daily basis, it frees up a lot of time to do other things, like more heroin. I think she’s a modern day hero and girls angelic voice can only mean one thing and that is that she’s sent to us from god as the new mesiah and that we should follow her lead.

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Tits

2008

12

Jun

Christina Ricci Feeds the Meter and Not Herself of the Day

So Christina Ricci is wearing spandex and by the looks of her sloppy skinny body, she looks like she’s still got her eating disorder. So the only feeding that goes on in her life is when she feeds her meter, because let’s face getting a parking ticket is a way worse fate than dying of starvation or an anorexic induced heart attack.

The truth is that I support eating disorders, despite not having one of my own, unless overeating shit counts and an eating disorder, which I think it does, but my kind of eating disorder makes slipping into a pair of leggings a really embarassing thing and not just becaue I have a small penis.

Posted in:Christina Ricci|Meter

2008

12

Jun

Bijou Phillips Flashes Traffic of the Day

Bijou Phillips won’t add me to facebook, I am guessing it’s got something to do with her having no idea who I am and her delusions of being someone famous make her defensive or some shit, but I like to think it’s because I personally offended her all the times I called her an Aids slut. I used to say how she’s from that hipster, art scene, coke slut, rich kid in New York scene where the chicks are models or hang with models and the dudes are artists, djs and photographers and none of them shower, not because they don’t have a shower, because their Manhatten lofts are pretty luxurious, but because it takes away from whatever the fuck they are trying to project. They dress like they are homeless despite having lots of money and the ratty clothes they rock are all desigher and they have nothing better to do with her time than get fucked up all night and sleep all day but somehow always make time to have unprotected sex.

She’s been fucking that Danny Masterson motherfucker from Malcom in the Middle for a long time because he has no taste in women and because she’s kinda locked him in by giving him whatever the fuck she had growing in her busted up cunt, making it hard for him to fuck his other groupies because of a guilty conscious of giving whatever it is she gave him to them, but I guess in her spare time, which she has a lot of, she’s out flashing Freeways because it’s so wild, funny, and obscure like a scene in the movie Kids.

I hate her and hope you do too.

Posted in:Bijou Phillips|Traffic Flasher

2008

12

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

Some motherfucker tried to make fun of me today, what he realizes is that I have no self esteem and only get offended when girls refuse to flash me on the internet. So sticks and stones may break my bones, but getting girls on cam who won’t get naked for me is what really breaks me….on the inside.

Here are my links, I lied when I said there wouldn’t be many today, it’ll give you something to do when I go out drinking.


Purple Man – Revenge of the Cheerleader
GO

Jessica Simpson Shows Off Some Tit
GO

Kendra Wilkinson’s Tits Support the Lakers
GO

Pam Anderson Has Fan
GO

Aisleyne Horgan Wallace is Topless Still
GO

Which team has the hotter chicks Celtics or Lakers?
GO

Kate Hudson Heads to the View Lookin Like The Slut She Is
GO

Snoop Dogg Made a Funny DVD
GO

Top 10 Hottest Sideline Reporters
GO

Zoo Weekly’s 2008 Euro Strip Off Where Sluts from European Countries Strip Off…
GO

Japanese Game Show Fun of the Day
GO

Charity Hodges Wants to Show You Her Bikini
GO

The Sex Dolls of Hollywood
GO

Choose the Right Lube for Sex, If You Ever Lose Your Virginity
GO

House of Wax
GO

Censor Bar Art Leaves Little to the Imagination
GO

Sky Dive Suicide Lands on House
GO

Some Angelina Jolie Pics I Had Never Seen Before and Almost Gave me a Boner
GO

Angry Prick Pummels a Group of Girls
GO

Wheelchair-Escalator Mishap That is Really Fucking Bad
GO

Indian Wall of Death Brings New Meaning to Fair Fun
GO

Gabriela’s DD’s Are Mind Boggling
GO

Trina and Sabrina Play with a Fucking Machine
GO

Fine Girls to Fuck, Because Fucking is Fun
GO

Nancy is Hot and Has a Nipple Piercing
GO

Naomi Campbell Takes a Fall
GO

Lily Allen and Her Pink Hair that Matches her Empty Womb…
GO

Jessica Simpson is Doing Something or Another
GO

Kid Rock’s Poll Dancers are Busted as Fuck – I Guess His Budget’s Been Scaled Down Since He Sucks
GO

Reese Whitherspoon is Boring and Looks 12
GO

Holly Did WHAT For Hugh Hefner?
GO

Butterface Has an Amazing Body
GO

Does Anyone Else See Anything Wrong With Mel Gibson Offering Britney Guidance?
GO

Jillian Beyor looks hot in red
GO

More Excuses for Me NOT to Work Out
GO

Pole Dancing Sluts on the Subway THROWBACK
GO

Use This to Get Sex and Enjoy Mating Activities With Someone Who Isn’t Your Hand
GO

Dual Dildo Ass Fuck
GO

And That’s Why You Don’t Do Drugs
GO

Breaking News – Paris Hilton Buys Capt’n’Crunch
GO

Marky Mark Hates the Beckhams
GO

Kid Fails Driving Test. Five Times
GO

X-Tina’s Husband is Starting to HAte Her as Much As I Do
GO

Man, What the FUCK Happened to Little Kim?
GO

New iPhone Explained in 60 seconds instead of 107 Minutes
GO

Jesus Walks on Water
GO

Brooke Hogan Hates That Her Mom is a Cougar
GO

Front Magazines Famous Five is Easy on the Eyes
GO

Some Daria Werbowy Beach Throwback
GO

Some Asian Slut Photocopies Her Boobs
GO

These Slags Get Naked and You Watch. It’s Really That Simple
GO

Caught on the Job
GO

Alyssa Milano Magazine Throwback
GO

Some Girls Who Showed Up at the Euro
GO

Jamie Lynn Spears’ Baby Joy Turns to Baby Tears Because Being 16 Is Rough
GO

Kelly Rowland is Showing Off her Legs
GO

Some Man Dressed Like a Penis Encourages People to Have Sex
GO

Some Naked Man Dances on a Car Naked After Running Through the Gas Pumps and is Amazing
GO

Some Fashion Model Named Judith Bedard Shows Her Pussy Before She Became Famous
GO

Here’s a Poll I Influenced and Want to Know the Answer to
GO

Some Retardedly Obese Dude Takes a Stand for His Wedding
GO

Some Dude’s Giant Woman Fetish
GO

SOME PORN REVIEWS

Big But Movie Club
GO

Curry Creampie
GO

Mommy Got Boobs
GO

Leg Sex
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Some Fat Black Chick’s Vagina
GO

Some Party Chicks and Ugly Chick Shows Her Tits
GO

BONUS Club Sluts Want You To See How Good They Look
GO

ANOTHER BONUS – Getting Laid Virtually is Better Then Getting AIDS
GO

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

11

Jun

Eva Herzigova in Her Bikini of the Day

I was never a fan of Eva Herzigova when she was modeling in the 90s, but that’s just because I wasn’t into skinny chicks back then and if I was, I probably wouldn’t be married to a very large vat full off fucking rancid pudding that is my wife, but I am into skinny chicks now and rightfully so, I guess I just evolve with the times like high fashion but not as expensive.

When I look at Eva Herzigova, I think of a time when I was a little smarter and instead of spending my days writing a website badly, I had big plans for myself. I had spent time with hookers and heard about this Mail Order bride service from communist countries and was doing everything I could to get up in that because as you know, I know a lot of desperate dudes would would be more than happy to buy happiness and by happiness I mean a permanent whore that they can call their wife.

I got so far as to meeting a few guys from the local Russian mob who were down to support my venture and would provide the girls who would be willing to be smuggled into America, the promised land of opportunity, if I set up the infrastructure. Now the word infrastructure in and of itself was intimidating because I am a lazy dude, so I just flaked out and went back to drinking but I heard they did really well with it, and even with the fall of communism, which I was hoping would put a damper on the business I like to think I was a forefather of but didn’t see a dime for, shit’s still going strong.

An elderly Eva Herzigova is probably the reason why, they just don’t make girls like this overhear, but they do make great fast food, so I guess it’s a trade off.

Posted in:Bikini|Eva Herzigova

2008

11

Jun

Ashlee Simpson’s Pregancy Tits of the Day

One of life’s recent great mysteries is how Ashlee Simpson got pregnant when the person she married has a vagina. I guess another one of life’s great mysteries will be when her kid subtracts his birthday by his parent’s wedding day and realizes that there are a couple months missing leading the little unfortunate fucker to knowing that he was an accident and that his good little Christian family is just fronting for the media because everyone knows Christians don’t fuck before marriage, especially with some cocksucker who may not be the anti-christ but is such a piece of garbage as a person tha you could only assume is something Satan shat up after eating too much Mexican food.

I guess the good news is that with pregnancy comes a newfound sluttiness because girls know it’s the end of them as they were and from now on are either pregnant or chicks with baggage when they are back on the market because their little girl husbands decide to fuck off with the pool boy after spending 6 months showing him his asymetric hair down there, and by down their I mean on his asshole.

Either way, she’s got solid cleavage and that’s good enough for me and probably good enough for you.

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Pregnancy|Tits

2008

11

Jun

Throwback Carmen Elecrta Nude in Some Photoshoot of the Day

I am tired of posting recent shit becaue the world has gone to shit and I am more interested in a simplier time, so this is Carmen Electra in some unknown photoshoot from a long time ago, spreading her legs and showing us her tits, both things that we’ve seen before and are happy to see again.

I guess you could say that she is nothing but a one-trick pony, except she will never turn tricks for you or ride you like a pony, you sick beastiality fuck, despite what your imagination that you believe is reality because you are insane and don’t get away from the computer might tell you.

On a happier note, the sheet she has between her legs gets a lot more pussy than you, but not a lot more pussy than the soiled piece of fabric I use as a sheet, but that’s got nothing to do with my skills in seducing ladies and more to do with my wife’s skill of having the biggest, stickiest vagina out of any girl I’ve met and manages to get that sheet up between the crevaces of her lips on the daily.

Eithery way, I heard this sheet for is available on e-bay and that may be the closest you ever get to her vagina, or any vagina at all so you should considering busting open that piggy bank and spending your vacation fund on it, but it may not be worth it considering how Comicon has always been a dream of yours.

Speaking of vaginas, i have a box of rubber ones sitting in my fridge that i found in some alley behind a sex shop that went bankrupt. I don’t really know what I was doing there or if the whole thing was a mirage (because the only water i drink is out of puddles) and but there is a box rubber vaginas sitting in my fridge because I like to keep the fresh and since i already adopted one because my wife’s is dead and I like to practice eating out pussy, the others are looking for love and homes too, so I am planning on giving them away with no guarantee that they have never been used and that they won’t give you aids, a guarantee that also comes with Carmen Electra’s pussy.

Posted in:Carmen Electra|Nude|Photoshoot